Fractured Hearts (Shattered Lives, Book Three) (6 page)

Strolling into their room with a swagger in his step, Gunther headed straight for the bed, where Quinn was thumbing through a book.

“What are you reading, my love?”

Holding up the book, she murmured, “The life cycle of a frog.”

“Is it compelling?”

“Absolutely.” She smirked. He plopped his big body down next to her, grabbing her face and kissing her. “Stop. I’m busy,” she mumbled against his lips.

He yanked the book out of her hands, throwing it aside. “Nope. Looks like you are doing nothing to me.” He leaned in and tried kissing her again, but she pushed him away. Her reaction scared him. “What’s wrong?”

“As much as I enjoy our intimacy, I can’t do it all the time. It’s been exhausting for me. Morning, night, sometimes in between… Just because you have a hard-on doesn’t mean you have to use it.” Gunther sat back looking somewhat crushed. “Don’t be like that, Gun.”

“Sorry if I’m extremely attracted to you. Besides, there’s nothing better to do,” he mumbled.

She sighed at him. “You’re making this difficult.”

“What?”

“This.” She waved between them and he sat straight up, panic written all over his face.

“I didn’t realize there was an issue. Could you fill me in?”

“Remember? Josie walked in on us.”

“Yes. It was embarrassing for both of us, but how is that an issue between us?”

“I don’t know. I feel like our relationship is turning out to be just about sex. Even though, I will freely admit, it is pretty mind-blowing.”

Gunther grinned with pride. “I’m glad you enjoy it because it’s you who makes me want to make it that way,” he murmured in Quinn’s ear, playing with her hair. Knowing his cool breath and seductive voice would make her insides stir, he continued, “When I see you come over and over again, it makes me feel good it’s me who sends you to that special place.”

Sitting forward, she moved away from him before she fell for his antics. “Okay, I understand that, but we have to do other things besides sex.”

“Like what?” he muttered with irritation. “Go out to dinner, the movies, for a stroll around the Eiffel Tower? Maybe a trip on the London Eye? Kill some undeads in candlelight?”

“Stop. You’re not funny.”

“Sorry. I didn’t… I was just… I don’t know,” he mumbled.

“Just figure something out. What else do you like to do?”

He shrugged, then muttered, “Workout.”

“Yeah, I figured that out.” She laughed, squeezing his bicep. “What else? There has to be something else.” Gunther looked down and frowned. “What?”

“I used to love to cook, but that’s not an option right now. I would love to cook you an amazing meal.”

“Really? I wish you could, too. There isn’t anything else you like to do?”

“Not really,” he sighed. “Why is this all on me?”

“I just want to know what else you like to do. Next time, I pick.”

“I was good at fucking, cooking, and fighting. That’s about it.”

Quinn thought for a moment. “Teach me how to fight.”

He looked at her like she was insane. “Fight? You want to learn how to fight? Like kickboxing?”

“Yeah. It would be useful. I only know how to pull a trigger.”

He perked up and felt a bit excited about the new task in front of him. “Well, let’s go to that little gym then.”

They got up, excited about doing something new, and walked hand-in-hand to the gym.

Gunther opened the door of the dark, shadowy gym. Pulling out the small flashlight he always carried in his pocket, he depressed the button and grumbled, “Fucking batteries.”

After scanning the room with the narrow swath of yellowing light, he found several candles, matches sitting by one.

The room wasn’t much, but there were gym mats, a couple racks of free weights, a bench, and a few pieces of power equipment, which weren’t of much use at the moment. There was also a mini gym set to work out legs and arms, and do squats. It was all basic, but necessary exercises.

“This will do. I’m going to teach you how to fight in the candlelight. It will be very romantic,” Gunther laughed, as Quinn smacked him on the arm.

They walked around and lit all the candles, then placed his Sig on the weight bench. Quinn followed suit. Slow and taunting, he took off his shirt.

“Show off.”

“What?” The innocent act wasn’t working on her.

She laughed. “You know you look good.”

“I’ve worked bloody hard to look this way, love,” he murmured, trying to pull off a nonchalant flex of his pecks.

“I bet, stud puppy.”

“Can it, bird.” She stuck her tongue out at him. “Okay, I’m going to teach you the basics of Krav Maga.”

“Uh…say what?”

“It’s a type of self-defense or fighting technique. It’s what they used to use for training in the Israeli army. In no time, you will be able to flip me.” She laughed. “I’m being serious.”

“Oh, okay… Sorry,” she said, trying to stifle a giggle.

Gunther shook his head and chuckled. “Whatever am I going to do with you?”

He went on to show Quinn the basics. She learned all the weak points of the human body, and the basic moves. Her quick progression, strength, and fitness level really impressed him. Then he showed her the technique behind the flip. She was the target, and he talked her through the steps a few times.

“Your turn,” he said with a smirk.

He stood in front of Quinn, his hands on his hips. She sized him up, noting that his shorts had slid down and were barely hanging on. “But you are so much bigger than I am,” she murmured with a lusty stare.

“You can do this.” He drew his bottom lip into his teeth and chomped down. Just thinking about her attempting to take control was making him thicken in his shorts.

“Okay,” Quinn sighed. “If you insist.”

Several highly unsuccessful attempts later, they both fell to the mat. The laughter went on for several minutes until they were out of breath.

“Maybe we should save that for when you can show me how to do it on someone else,” Quinn said as she pushed herself up onto her elbows.

A bead of sweat traveled down her forehead. Gunther reached out and swiped it away. “You look so fucking sexy right now,” he said in a low growl.

“Are you mental?”

“I thought we already established that.” He crawled in closer, like a big cat stalking its prey. “I love that you’re all hot and sweaty. Turns me the fuck on.”

“A hole in the wall would turn you on.”

He sighed. “Not nice.” As he nuzzled Quinn’s ear with his nose, goose bumps rose on her skin. He shifted, moving to within millimeters of her lips. He was so close, an electric feel moved between them.

Gunther pounced on her like a hungry animal. He pulled off her clothes and kicked off his shorts in record time. He pushed her down, kissing her, momentarily pinning her shoulders to the mat before his hands frantically roamed all over her body.

She returned each kiss, running her hands down his pronounced chest, past his abdomen. A groan filled the room when she reached his aching shaft. His fingers walked down her body and weaved their way between her folds. She was ready for him, he was going to fuck her until she screamed again and again.

There was no tenderness when he slammed into her, a deep growl escaping his chest. “Jesus fucking Christ…,” he yelled, his body shuddering.

Quinn cried out so loudly, her throat burned and tears formed in her eyes. His thrusts were vigorous and he wasn’t letting up. He wasn’t being his usual self, but she let herself go when she realized the pain was exhilarating. He was fucking her harder than he ever had and she loved every second of it.

“Harder,” she whispered in Gunther’s ear.

Every vicious thrust was met eagerly, each time forcing himself into her harder and deeper than the last. He gripped the edge of the mat with both hands, holding his upper body taut so he could focus all his energy into his lower body. His abs burned with fatigue and he wanted to give in, but he had to get them to that pot of gold. She dug her nails into his back and sides, causing him to bark out more obscenities.

She cried out again. His size and power hurt her terribly, but her moans and movements between her screams told him she loved the feeling. A groan rumbled from his chest as she trembled beneath his big body.

As he drove her right over the edge like a runaway freight train, Quinn peaked. She went limp and had nothing left to give. Gunther finished seconds later, kicking hard inside her, hissing each time his seed pulsed out. When he fell on top of her, they were a sloppy, wearied mass of sweaty limbs and bodies, robbed of breath.

Her fingertips traveled up and down his back. He moaned with pleasure and found the little energy he needed to roll off of her and onto his back. “Holy shit,” Gunther said between breaths. “I had no idea you liked it that way.”

“I didn’t, either, but I loved it.” He smiled. “I love that wild, untamed beast lingering under the surface. You have brought new meaning to sex…fucking…making love.”

Gunther reached over and took her hand. “I figured I would just go for it and you would tell me to stop if it was too much.” Turning on his side, he nuzzled her ear again.

They lay on the floor, fully exposed, until the candles started extinguishing one-by-one.

Hand-in-hand, Quinn and Gunther walked to the cafeteria to get a bottle of water. It was turning out to be the common gathering spot for everyone.

Nick and Josie were entertaining the kids, Kate sitting in the chair and plucking the guitar strings. “Be right back,” he said and kissed Quinn’s forehead. She smiled as he headed for the kids.

“Mr. Gunther!” Silas yelled.

“Hey, mate!” Silas jumped up and hugged him. Carefully picking away on the guitar strings, Kate played a few chords. “That sounds great, Kate. Much better than I could ever do.”

“Thank you, sir.” Her voice was soft and low, still a bit shy around Gunther.

“She said her dad used to play and she always wanted to learn, so I thought I’d teach her,” Nick said with a smile, excited to have a purpose and something else to focus on.

Gunther scooped up Callie and tickled her, making her giggle. Quinn watched the scene from afar with such pride because of how far he had come with his ability to feel compassion and genuinely care about others.

He’s a pro
, she thought, watching him dance around with Callie.

When Cora and Elaina walked through the door, Cora stopped and glared at Gunther with a furrowed brow. Quinn went to her.

“He only wants them to be happy. He adores them.” Quinn swallowed hard. “He wants nothing more than to be a father, but I can’t give that to him.”

“I see that,” Cora said with an air of a broken heart. “Since we’ve all been together, he has shown them more fatherly love than Peter ever did. He wasn’t the hands-on type. I guess it just hurts seeing how affectionate he is, and they aren’t even his.”

Quinn took Cora’s hand. “I want to thank you.”

“Me?” Cora tilted her head in confusion. “Why?”

“Gunther has had an
extremely
rough life. Up until a couple years ago, he endured a lot of physical and mental abuse. When I say a lot, I mean on a daily basis. He has come a long way. He spent many days and nights hating himself, thinking he wasn’t allowed to love or be loved.”

“That’s so sad,” Cora said as she held her hand over her mouth, eyes welling with guilty tears.

“It’s been a struggle for me to get through to him that he is
so
worthy of being loved, but those kids have really been a world of help for him. I haven’t seen him this happy…ever.”

“I had no idea. I feel terrible for slapping him and yelling. I need to go apologize.” Cora headed over to Gunther.

One more turn around with Callie and he saw Cora walking up to them. Gunther tried to hand Callie to her and escape. “I’m sorry. Here.”

Holding up her hands, she said, “No. Please continue. She’s happy with what you’re doing…and that makes
me
happy.” He gazed at her curiously. With a smile, she touched his arm. “I would like to say I’m sorry for my terrible behavior. I understand what you are trying to do for my kids, and I appreciate it. You have been such a blessing for my children, and I cannot thank you enough.”

Cheeks flushing from the kind words he rarely heard from anyone other than Quinn, he turned away and whispered, “Thank you.” His voice was rough, fighting the lump rising in his throat. “That means a lot to me.”

After a quick embrace, Cora focused her attention on Kate, who was taking her lesson seriously. Gunther picked up Silas and danced around the room with both the kids. Watching from a distance, Quinn smiled, enjoying seeing him so happy.

Nick invited Josie back to his room. She sat in a chair, as he planted himself on top of the desk. Hanging out with her was the first time he had been able to laugh since Claire and Willow passed. They talked about their favorite songs and how much they missed the internet, going to the movies, and all the unnoticed music that used to surround them.

“I still can’t believe you never had a lesson. That blows my mind. I took lessons for a while, but I grew tired of the lame chord sessions. So I started working hard on my own, developing my own style.”

“That would bore me to death. My guitar was a gift from an uncle. I had no idea if I would even like it, but he said he bought it for me because of the pure joy music gave me. Messing around with it for hours at a time, I was finally able to play by ear. I can’t read a lick of music, though.”

Hopping down from the desk, Josie threw Nick a nervous glance. “Don’t be nervous.” He reached out for her hand. “Dance with me.”

With her hand in his, she rose to her feet. A tender touch and a gentle grace in his movements, he wrapped his arms around her. Hesitantly, she put her arms around his neck, then rested her head on his chest. He hummed her favorite song as they swayed together. Josie didn’t want the moment to end.

It felt good to hold her—to hold someone. “This is wonderful…doing this with you,” he whispered.

She peered up at him and was mesmerized by his gaze. Slowly, he leaned down and kissed her. Trying to be a gentleman and act accordingly, his lips traveled effortlessly over hers. But then, with a slight tilt of his head, his kisses turned greedier. He ran his hands down her sides and groaned when she pressed her body against his.

The feel of his body reacting to her made her insides scream for attention. She wondered if he realized it was her, not Claire. The pull deep inside her body was looking to be relieved. Something she had never really felt from a man before.

Nick picked her up and carried her to the bed. Before he settled on top of her, her eyes wandered around his body. He was beautiful, lean, and trim. As her eyes traveled south, she could see he was hard and ready, trapped behind the zipper of his dingy jeans. He pulled off his shirt and she shimmied out of her hoodie, exposing the worn white tank top underneath.

This was all new to Josie. She was freaking out, but she didn’t want to show it.

His lips passed over her jawline and trailed down her neck, working his way down to her chest. He ran his hand under her tank top, cupping her breast, feeling her warm, supple skin under his coolness. His thumb brushed and traced circles around her already hard nipple. A quiet moan escaped her lips as the pull intensified. Nick dipped his head down and, through her shirt, pulled her nipple into his mouth. She let out a gasp, making him smile against her breast.

Taking a chance, Josie reached down and touched him through his jeans. He closed his eyes and a breath escaped his parted lips. She unzipped him and allowed her hand to travel inside, feeling what she did to him. Unsure of what to do, but doing what felt natural, she griped him and stroked, feeling the enticing smooth skin and each protruding vein run through her fist. Her thumb ran over his tip, spreading around the moisture beading up.

His breath hitched. “Shit… Oh fuck, that feels good,” he moaned, moving his hips in time with Josie’s hand.

A sickening feeling in the pit of Nick’s stomach bloomed tenfold, stretching through the length of his whole body. Regret and guilt crept into his mind. Pressure built in his chest. Claire hadn’t been gone too long and there he was, getting ready to have sex with somebody else. He couldn’t do that to the love of his life…not yet. He wasn’t ready to push her aside.

Balanced above Josie, he went still, his forehead pressed to hers. Concerned about his reaction, Josie stopped. She took his face in her hands. “Nick? Did I do something wrong?”

When he opened his eyes, the sadness overwhelmed her to the point she gasped. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this right now. I didn’t mean to mislead you.” Nick rolled off of her and zipped his jeans.

“Okay. I can leave,” Josie muttered as she sat up to grab her hoodie.

“No. I want you to stay. Stay with me and let me hold you. Please,” he whimpered. “I need you next to me.”

Confusion struck her. “I can do that, if that’s what you want.”

He apologized again and kept saying he wasn’t emotionally ready yet. She understood, but the hurt was still there. Face-to-face, she lay with him curled around her, his arm lazily wrapped around her slim waist, face buried in the crook of her neck.

Being there with him was comfortable.

Nick’s body had steadied, and she knew he’d fallen asleep. Josie played with his black, shaggy hair while listening to him breathe.

The emotions ran rampant and she did her best to hide the tears leaking from her eyes. Even though they only just started interacting with each other, she was falling for him, but she knew he would never be able to give it back to her. He was stuck, and she felt devastated for him.

Nick’s heart was buried with Claire and Willow. It could never follow another.

Sleeping while Henry was detoxing was not an option for Elaina. Watching him go through the shakes, tremors, profuse sweating, and the endless rounds of vomiting, even when there was nothing left to give, brought new meaning to scary and painful. With all the tears and hallucinations, it was an endless unpleasant sensory onslaught on both sides of the fence.

After a full night of hell for Elaina, he finally fell asleep as the sun was peeking over the horizon. She wished she could’ve done the same, but was too worried about him to even think about it.

She still couldn’t believe he did this to himself. It killed her to see him so sick. Her greatest fear? What if she didn’t catch him before he turned? She continued to peel open his eyelids and check the color of his irises. Moaning, he would swat at her hands every time.

Feeling the need for nourishment, Elaina decided to head out to the cafeteria. As she shuffled to the door, a light knock sounded. Quinn… She was always there for everyone.

“Hey,” Elaina said, feeling an admiration for her that went far deeper than she could express. Someday, she hoped to be even half the woman Quinn was.

“I was just checking on him. How’s it going?” she asked, brushing her fingers over Elaina’s cheek.

Elaina opened the door all the way and let her in, figuring Henry wouldn’t mind.

Battling her emotions, she tried not to shatter in front of Quinn. The angry and melancholy tears rode the edges of her lids. Quinn sensed the struggle and pulled her into an embrace. “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay,” she soothed in Elaina’s ear. “You two will get through this.”

“It’s so hard to see him this way, knowing he did this to himself.”

“I understand,” Quinn murmured.

Cutting through the sniffles and choked sobs, Henry mumbled Elaina’s name. She turned and gazed at him. He was shivering, even though the blanket was pulled up to his chin.

Elaina’s voice echoed through my head.

She was talking to someone, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying. The need for her to hold me was so immense, my body was wracked with tremors and cold sweats. The pain and craving for a drink stung with such intensity, I was close to losing ground.

Between that and knowing how I fucked things up between us, I wanted to curl into a ball and die. I needed to apologize for everything I had done to us. It shouldn’t have been this way.

I needed to be her hero, the love of her life, healthy enough so I could take care of her. In return, I just wanted her to fucking love me. That was all.

There was still a little hope lingering she would accept me and not just pretend to love me. Not appease me. She had to be feeling pity. I just needed her to love me like the man I used to be. I needed to get back to that…body, mind, and soul.

My throat was dry, my lips drier. My eyelids were still shut tight because there was no way I could open them. I couldn’t take the light or the look of shame and pity on her face. I tried to call for her, but she must not have heard me.
Try again.
I needed her to hold me because I was falling to bits.

Again, I called out to her. “L-laina…” Still no response. Maybe it was a dream, or maybe she left me for good. Knowing it was going to hurt, I belted out a scream. “Elaina!”

Two sets of feet ran toward me. Maybe they didn’t know if I was awake or having a night terror. All I needed was to feel her touch. Her warm, delicate fingertips on my drenched skin. Her heated body against the chill of mine.

“Elaina!” I bellowed once more.

“I’m here, lover,” she said, her tender words stroking my ears.

“Don’t go… Don’t leave me,” I whispered through the ache in my throat.

“I’m right here with you.”

She sat next to me and I rolled over, putting my face in her lap, clawing at her body and clutching onto her torso, trying to keep her right where she was. I used all the strength I had left.

She pushed her fingers through my dampened hair. A voice cut through, one that took me a moment to figure out. “Let me get you something to clean him up.”

Quinn… Oh god. She was witnessing me melting down. More humiliation.

“Laina…,” I whispered.

She repeated, “I’m here with you.”

From the crack in her voice, she was fighting her emotions as much as I was. The blanket, wet from my sweat, was peeled back from my body. A rush of cold hit me, sending an uncontrollable shiver coursing through my body. Then a wet cloth touched my skin, circling around my neck and upper back.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled to her.

“What, lover?” she asked, leaning down and trying to hear my muffled voice.

“I’m sorry…,” I said louder. “I’m so sorry.” Then I shattered, the sobs tearing out of my throat. “Elaina…” My whole body quaked.

“Shh… We’ll get through this.” Her voice shook. “You and me.”

Her words seemed unsure. I needed her to find more strength. It was all we had left.

“If you need anything, come and get me,” Quinn murmured as she walked out the door.

As soon as she closed it, Elaina held me. I continued to cry, “I’m so sorry I did this to us. It’s me. I’m sorry.”

“Henry…” I nuzzled my face into her abdomen. After lifting my arm and wrapping it around her waist, she murmured, “It’s going to be okay.”

“Just hold me. My body hurts so badly,” I cried as tremor after tremor tormented my diseased body. “Don’t leave me. I beg you.”

“Lover, I’m right here for you. I’m not going anywhere.” Her voice hitched as she fought not to cry. That was the last thing I needed. She had to be strong, but I sucked the life right out of her, leaving her just as barren as me.

She continued to wipe the sweat that seemed to be an endless leak from my pores. “I’m sorry,” I said again.

“Let me see your eyes.” Tipping my head back, Elaina pulled open one eyelid. “You need another fix?” I nodded. “Let me go get someone to hook me up.”

I hesitated, then allowed her to help me back to the pillow. When she left the bed, I felt alone in every way possible, fearful she wouldn’t come back. If I lost Elaina, I was done with it all. Giving up and letting it all go would be the only answer.

One bullet and one pull of the trigger was all it would take. No longer would I be a burden, and the pain would no longer haunt me. The world would be better off without me running through it. The more I thought about it, the more the temptation grew.