Fractured Memory (8 page)

EIGHT

T
he motion of the litter lurching along the cliff face caused Julia’s stomach to roll with nausea. Before they started their drive into the mountains, they had eaten lunch, but the energy she expended to get the three of them out of the SUV had used up every last calorie. She had been starving until the wind started knocking the basket into the canyon wall.

Ben placed a reassuring hand on her forearm. She began to shiver uncontrollably.

How is it possible to be so cold...so tired?

Her body begged for sleep. When would that be possible? What was the next step?

The litter pummeled against the rock. Bits of stone showered her body. Ben removed his hand and gripped the side of the litter and planted his feet against the rock, which further steadied the motion. Julia nervously brushed the pebbles from her face.

“What happened on the road?” Ben asked.

She practiced this tactic every ER shift. Get patients to talk about anything to serve as a distraction from the emotional trauma they were experiencing. Did knowing the tactic make it any less effective?

The litter swayed and tilted Julia’s head higher than her feet. She grabbed the sides of the basket.

“You’re not going to fall. I promise.”

Julia closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths.

Just trust him. He knows what he’s doing.

“I don’t know,” she said. “Eli couldn’t control the vehicle. Nothing he did worked. He couldn’t even turn the wheel.”

“Like someone else was driving?”

Another jerk. Julia tried to calm her shaking. “Yes.”

“The SUV could have been remotely controlled.”

Julia’s heart sank further. “How?”

“All that’s required is a laptop. The person doesn’t even have to be close.”

If that was true...how could she be safe...ever?

“How can we find out for sure?” Julia asked.

“If your car was remotely controlled by someone else, it would be one of the first known cases for the make and model of the SUV you were driving. It’s been demonstrated that vehicles can be hacked into. One well-known carmaker recently had a recall for this very thing. We can search for signals to trace, and try to search the vehicle.” Ben glanced over his shoulder and grinned. “Might be difficult with where Eli parked it. Hang on...we’re almost there.”

Hands grabbed Julia and lifted the litter over the edge of the rock face. They set her down by an awaiting ambulance. The team released her and helped her stand up, offering her a blanket and a bottle of water. They assisted her to the ambulance gurney and she sat down—feeling better with a few small comforts. The blanket wrapped her with relief.

Ben kneeled down next to her. His black hair plastered to the top of his forehead, but his green eyes held her with determination. “It’s amazing what you did, Julia. I never thought I’d see the three of you alive again. Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For sparing me from having to tell all your families that you were gone. That’s...the hardest thing anyone has to do. Something tells me you know what I’m talking about.”

Julia bit into her lip. She wanted to be strong, but her mind reeled back to one of the many times she had sat with a family as a physician or chaplain delivered devastating news. A child—maybe five or six—hearing that she had been the only survivor of a house fire. That her father had died trying to rescue her younger siblings from the hot, all-consuming flames.

And then Julia’s own parents when she learned of their deaths months after they had been buried. When she grasped what had happened and was physically able to visit their graves, her grandfather was the only thing that held her upright when she nearly collapsed.

“You’re a survivor, Julia. This is nothing compared to what you’ve already been through. Will is going to wait with you. I’m going back down to help get Eli and Jace up.”

She nodded but couldn’t speak.

Ben turned and left. Would she, though? Be fine? Considering Ben had suggested it was probable the car was remotely controlled by someone?

* * *

Eli and Julia sat knee to knee—both on their own ambulance gurney—huddled in blankets and drinking water. Eli thought he’d never want anything to do with water again, but every cell in his body cried out for hydration and he found himself guzzling through three bottles.

“Can I have that?” Eli asked Ben after spotting the water bottle he was holding.

“I already started drinking out of it,” Ben said.

“I don’t mind.” Eli reached his hand out.

Ben surrendered the bottle. “Fine. You can drink it on your way to the hospital.”

“I’m not going to the hospital,” Eli said.

From the look on Julia’s face, he could tell she was none too pleased with him. It didn’t really matter. He had to separate his feelings for Julia, his wanting to please her, from his duty to do his job and keep her safe.

“That’s the dumbest decision you could make,” Ben interjected, who stood near them. The haunting flashes of white and red lights the only thing that broke the settling darkness. They were still waiting for the alpine rescue team to retrieve Jace.

“Well, you haven’t known me that long. I’m sure there will be more.”

Julia’s searched his face. It was unsettling how she seemed to read his thoughts with a glance of her brown eyes. He forced himself to keep her gaze even though his insides squished like melted jelly. It was as if her eyes could know his every thought without him uttering a word. There hadn’t been any other woman that affected him this way.

Finally, she spoke. “Eli, you drowned. You died. You have to go to the hospital—”

“It doesn’t matter what you tell me. I’m not going.” He turned to Ben. “Now we need to rethink exactly where we’re going. Until we can figure out—”

Julia stood up, the blanket dropping from her shoulders. “I’m not done talking. I’m the medical professional here, and you’re going to listen to what I have to say. You’re not out of the woods. The dirty, scummy river water that flooded your lungs could cause infection and fluid to build up, making it hard for you to breathe. You need to be monitored in a hospital setting for at least twenty-four hours.”

Eli’s heart jumped. The way her eyes implored him, the stern directness of her words, it was more than a nurse concerned for his safety. He put his hands up and motioned her to sit back down. “I get it. I understand what you’re saying, but right now it’s not going to happen.”

“Then we have to think of a compromise,” Ben said. “Somewhere you think Julia can be safe but you still get medical attention.”

“The ER doctor you met... James. He lives up here—some huge cabin. Let me call him and see if we can stay with him a few days until the two of you get things figured out,” Julia suggested.

Eli drank more water as he considered her offer.

“And he can keep his eye on you, which will make me a much more cooperative, compliant witness.”

Ben chuckled as if Julia’s suggestion was something impossible for her to accomplish.

“Call him,” Eli said. Julia wandered away to borrow a cell phone.

Eli knew he could trust only himself and wanted everyone else out of the picture. On the other hand, Julia was right. He was tired. More tired than he dreamed possible. And there was no denying the ache and slight rattle in his chest. What was he risking by not going to the hospital?

Applause drew Eli’s attention up the road where several rescuers were pulling Jace over the edge to safety. They eased him from the litter and handed him the same cursory threadbare blanket and water to drink. Jace looked as wiped as Eli felt. The river had its fun with them and only spat them out because Julia insisted upon it. If he could go his whole life without needing another paramedic, firefighter or ropes expert, it would still be a day too soon.

Julia walked back to the group. “He was home. He says it’s fine and they have plenty of room for all of us. They’ll be waiting with some home-cooked food to celebrate us being freed from the clutches of death.” Julia frowned at their response. “Any humor, people? We’re all alive. It’s something to celebrate. And ER people always celebrate with food. Have none of you heard about the obligatory chocolate drawer?”

Eli stood from the gurney—the ache spreading through his chest. He coughed several times. “This is the plan, and I’m the senior agent here, so I don’t want grief from any of you. Ben, you’re going with Jace to the hospital to get him checked out and then you’re going home for a good night’s rest.” He searched for Will, who stood just beyond the reach of the light that drifted from the inner compartment of the ambulance. “Will, you and I are going to take Ben’s car to this doctor’s house. You can take a quick nap, but then you’ll be up keeping an eye on things overnight. One night’s rest, and I’ll be good to go. We still have a job to do.”

Eli looked at Ben, whose mouth gaped open in protest. Eli shook his head to keep Ben silent.

The man refused to heed his warning. “Honestly, Eli, you’re in no condition to make any decisions. All three of you need to go to a hospital for evaluation—”

“Julia’s friend can look us over. You said yourself we needed a compromise, and this is it.” Eli coughed into his hand.

Ben crossed his arms over his chest. “You can’t physically protect her right now. I say you and Jace go to the hospital and take a few days off. I’ll take Julia to the doctor’s house with Will and we’ll keep her there until she’s rested and we develop another game plan.”

Eli pulled Ben away from the group into the periphery just beyond the reach of the rescue lights. He didn’t want Julia to hear what he was going to say. He needed Julia to trust him, and so far he hadn’t done much to instill that trust in her. Protecting her from the threat on her life was his primary goal, and separating himself from her would only weaken his position of trust in her mind. “I don’t want an argument with you. Right now the only one I fully trust is myself—”

“And evidently Will,” Ben said.

“I’ve worked with him longer. This isn’t a judgment against you or the job I think you can do. After all, you rescued us. Ultimately, she’s my responsibility.”

“Eli, you keep convincing yourself you’re being professional, but you’re not. It’s obvious this case is too personal for you and it’s affecting your judgment. This is the perfect example.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because you’re physically wasted, and you still think you can perform your duties. This choice is putting her at risk.”

“It is the best course of action to take.”

Ben pressed his lips together and nodded. “Fine. We’ll see if she’s still alive by morning.” He turned on his heel and paced back to the group.

Eli crushed the flimsy water bottle in his fist and threw it to the ground. If Ben was proven right, that Julia died because Eli couldn’t defend her in his weakened state, he didn’t know if he could ever forgive himself. He needed space and time to think.

Hopefully, this remote location wasn’t exactly what the hit man was hoping for.

NINE

W
hile waiting for a response to their knock at the door, Julia could hear a trickle of water moving over smooth river stones at the small creek that wound its way around the fairy tale log cabin. If only that had been the body of water she’d been thrust into.

Laura Solan, Dr. James Solan’s wife, opened the door and immediately gathered Julia into a warm hug and in that moment, Julia broke down. Laura squeezed her tighter, smoothing her hand over her dry, crusted hair in an effort to ease her sobs. In that hold was everything that Julia missed from her mother. The sweet, tangy smell of perfume. The quiet, calming, swooshing of Laura’s heartbeat in her ear.

“Sweet Julia. What a day you’ve had.” Laura eased Julia back and placed a lightly fisted hand under her chin to lift it up. “You’re safe here. We’re going to take good care of you.”

Laura’s tender light green eyes offered the dose of compassion that Julia needed. Laura brushed her reddish brown bangs from her eyes and offered an open hand to Julia. “Come in. James, they’re here!”

Julia felt Eli’s hand rest in the middle of her back and edge her into the foyer. His touch lingered far beyond the steps she needed to take, and when he withdrew it, it felt as if a small hole opened in her chest.

“I can’t thank you enough for taking us in,” Julia said.

“If I can say anything, it’s that this tragedy happened at a good time. I’m off for several days and there’s nothing I’d like to do more than to take care of you and your friends.”

The three of them were standing in the magnificent entryway when Dr. James Solan walked toward them. Julia’s eyes were drawn to the three-level open foyer with windows that held a magnificent view of the mountains. The Solans’ home was situated in a valley surrounded by the tall granite peaks Colorado was known for.

“Julia, I’m happy to see you again so soon, but not under these circumstances.” He reached his hand out and shook Eli’s hand. “Why don’t you and I—”

Eli coughed into his hand, and Julia’s nursing intuition threw up a red flag.

“This is Agent Will Sullivan,” Eli said.

James shook his hand, as well. “Will, it doesn’t look like you need to freshen up, so I’ll put you in the kitchen with some fresh coffee.”

“Is there a couch I could crash on for a few hours?” Will asked. “I’ll be our night watchman.”

“Absolutely,” James said. “I’ll show you to a quiet spot and then, Eli—you’re with me. Looks like your head needs a few stitches. After that a hot shower and dry clothes. You look to be around the size of one of our two sons, and we’ve got some boxes with his old clothes that we never got around to donating. Won’t be perfect, but at least something better than what you’re wearing.”

“And you’re with me,” Laura said to Julia. “In the master bath. Big Jacuzzi tub waiting for you and then a nice hot meal.”

Her generosity brought more tears to Julia’s face, and she allowed Laura to take her like a child anywhere Laura wanted her to go.

Up the curved staircase and into a master bedroom that filled half the top level. A two-sided fireplace was situated between the master bedroom and the bathroom, and Laura had turned it on to warm the bathroom.

Laura motioned to the things that she had set aside for her. A lush navy blue towel. Several options of body washes and shampoos. She laughed to herself. “A girl can never have too many choices, right?”

Julia smiled. She’d met Laura on a few occasions during parties that the emergency medicine doctors would host at Christmas. Laura was the epitome of a soft place to land. Julia yanked a tissue from a nearby box and covered her eyes.

What a mess I am! The first ounce of kindness that someone shows me and I’m ready to fall to pieces. I’m an ER nurse. I’m used to handling a crisis without being so emotional. What’s wrong with me?

Laura motioned to have her sit with her on the side of the tub, and she wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “Julia, do you need to talk?”

At first, all she could do was cry. How could she explain what she felt? Was this what her life was going to be like from now on? Never being able to have a place she could call home again? Was the existence she’d had before, depending only on herself and living completely isolated from everyone except her grandfather, really living?

“Things are such a mess,” Julia said.

Laura rubbed her shoulder. “If even half of what James told me has happened, then you have every reason to be crying your eyes out. Has someone really put a hit out on your life?”

“I can’t help but believe it’s true because ever since I was taken into protective custody, all these strange events have been taking place.”

“Did you know Eli before this happened?”

Julia tapped her heels against the side of the tub, her feet still wet and sticky from her dunk in the river. How to answer that question? It was clear that Eli had been significantly involved in her past as far as the Hangman’s case was concerned. Did it go beyond that? The flashes she began to have seemed like memories cresting the surface of her consciousness. Was Eli the trigger? Or was it just the trauma of what she had lived through that caused her normal defense mechanisms to break down and the events to surface?

“He was the detective on my case after my accident.”

“It was hardly an accident. You were almost murdered.” Laura sighed. “It’s just this look he has in his eye whenever he glances your way. Even in the few moments I saw him with you, I could tell he didn’t want you out of his sight.”

“He’s doing a job. It’s nothing more than that.”

A coy smiled played on Laura’s lips. “Julia, it’s so much more than that. It’s the same look James gave me when I knew he fell in love with me.”

Julia’s heart skipped a beat. The word so foreign in her mind when all she’d felt was lost love over the past couple of years. Her parents. Nearly losing her career.

“We can contemplate all that when you’re rested.” Laura reached behind Julia and turned the water on. “I’m slightly more round and shorter than you are, but this pair of sweats should get you through the night at least. When you come down, leave what you’re wearing in here and I’ll run it through the wash and have it ready for you by morning. All I want you to do tonight is eat and sleep and not get up at any particular time. Nurse’s orders.”

Julia smiled. If she was one—she had also better listen to one. Though Laura’s specialty had been the neonatal ICU.

“Lotion and a hair dryer are by the sink. New toothbrush and toothpaste, as well. Living up here, you never know who’s going to stop in stranded with few if any of their belongings.” She stood. “It’s been a long time since I’ve gotten to chat with you. I always felt like you were the kind of girl who could be the daughter I never had, and I know you lost your own mother, so take this with the love it’s meant to convey.” Laura ran her fingers through the water, testing the temperature, and then adjusted the knobs slightly. “I know things have been hard for you, Julia, but there are people here to help you. You are not going to go through this alone. I won’t allow it.”

All Julia could offer in response was a tired smile. “I can’t thank—”

“Saying thank you is generous and not necessary. James says you’re family and you can stay here as long as you need to.”

And with those words she left Julia alone.

Julia stood in front of the mirror. Her clothes, now dry, stuck to her in a wrinkled mash of crusty fabric. Her hair was matted with leaves, and branches stuck in the tangles. She reached her arms out, noting the deep purple bruises that dotted areas on her lower forearms. Nothing that wouldn’t heal. Nothing that would leave a scar.

At least a physical one.

She brushed her fingers over the scars on her neck, new tears coursing down her cheeks. Would she ever stop crying? The scarf she’d been wearing was long gone. Both of Eli’s shoes were claimed by the river. Though the act was generous, the clothes that Laura had left her were not going to cover up what she most wanted to hide. Even when her clothes were washed, these scars would be exposed. People would see. People would ask her. She’d have to share her story.

Would that crush her or save her?

* * *

The table was set to evoke peaceful solace. Eli felt almost human. The expected muscle soreness hedged with a hefty dose of ibuprofen. Dr. Solan had numbed up the cut on his forehead, washed it out and closed it with five stitches. He was clean and dressed in dry clothes that fit better than expected. Will, having not had a free rafting trip, remained in his business suit and sat next to Eli. Julia sat across from him in a loose-fitting pair of sweats.

Would she ever drop her hand from her throat?

The smell of bacon and earthy corn from Laura’s chowder caused Eli’s stomach to turn over with anticipation. Even the fresh, cold water was taking the edges off his exhaustion.

James sat at the head of the table. “Shall we say grace?”

Julia dutifully dropped her head. Eli looked down, his hands settled in his lap. These moments felt strange to him. He longed for connectedness—this type of connectedness. Friends and family sharing a meal together. He had family, but they were distant. Rarely did they communicate unless there was an emergency.

“Father, we thank You for keeping Eli and Julia safe today. Bless our time together. Thank You for providing Eli and Will to be watchful protectors over Julia and allow them to bring to justice this criminal who threatens Julia’s life. Amen.”

Julia repeated the Amen. Eli lifted his eyes. Laura began to scoop full ladles of the soup into their bowls. A basket of homemade white dinner rolls passed by, and Eli hoped taking three wouldn’t seem too aggressive. Next was the soft, real butter that he slathered on, followed by cherry jelly.

If only all was perfect.

What Eli couldn’t deny was the ceaseless tightness and pain in his chest. Between each bite of chowder he coughed. At one point, he brought a clean white napkin to his lips and hacked into it. Bringing it away, he noticed a slight pink tinge.

Julia glanced his way at just the right moment and saw it, as well.

“James,” Julia said, motioning to Eli. “Can you check Eli out? I think he might be getting some fluid buildup in his lungs.”

“What?” Eli shook his head in defiance. “Really, I’m fine. Just coughing up some of that extra river water that’s camped out. Nothing to worry about.” Again, he was racked by a coughing fit.

James stood from the table. “Nonsense. I think Julia’s excellent nursing judgment is at play here. Come with me.”

Will clambered to his feet. “Eli, seems like a good time to do a perimeter check.”

“Good idea.” Eli stood, as well. “A terrific meal, Laura. Thanks so much for making us feel so welcome.”

James motioned for Julia to follow. “I’ll need you, too, Julia—an extra set of medical hands will be nice and Laura tends to freak out about any patient over ten pounds.”

Laura rolled her eyes. “And you tend to freak out at anything less than ten pounds, so we’re even. Take Eli up to the loft. All your medical gear is up there and it’s where I was going to settle Eli and Julia for the night anyway.”

Once they crested the staircase, James motioned for him to sit on the couch that sat along the wall. The ceiling, planked with simply stained pine boards, narrowed into a peak. French doors led to a deck that overlooked the gentle brook that looped through their property.

“Really, Dr. Solan. I’m fine.” Eli clenched his teeth to keep from coughing, but despite his best efforts more spasms racked his chest.

“When did you start to feel this way?” James asked.

Eli glanced Julia’s way—there was that look again. One eye slightly narrowed with a slight smirk to her face. That look was more effective at keeping him truthful than being connected to a lie detector. “Not long after coming out of the water—definitely once we made it out of the canyon.”

James pulled an orange trauma pack from the closet, zipped open a small compartment, fished out a small device and placed it on Eli’s finger. “Let’s see where your oxygen level is at.”

Julia sat on a chair across from him. “I don’t know how long he wasn’t breathing. It took less than a minute of CPR to get bring him back to me.”

Eli straightened a little bit at her statement and saw a faint rush of crimson color her cheeks. It was an odd way to phrase what had happened unless she had something beyond just a need for protection from him. Did she have feelings for him? Could she?

James pulled out a stethoscope and looped it around his neck. “Eli, you nearly drowned, and we only say that you nearly drowned because you didn’t die. The fluid in your lungs is filling up the tiny air sacks. It’s why you’re coughing so much.” He laid the stethoscope against his chest. “Take a deep breath.”

Eli complied. James frowned. The monitor on his finger began to beep.

Julia stood up and looked at the reading. “Eighty-six percent.”

James crossed his arms over his chest. “That’s not good, Eli. Even at altitude, we’d want you higher than that. Your lungs sound junky—a very official medical term for stuff being there that shouldn’t. A hospital is the safest place for you to be.”

How could he make them understand? He wouldn’t go. “That’s not possible. I need to stay here with Julia.”

James turned to Julia. “I’m willing to start treating him here if you’ll help watch over him, but I can’t stay up all night because I have to drive down to work in the morning.”

“I’ll do what needs to be done unless he gets too sick,” Julia said. “But, Eli, if I say you have to go to the hospital, then you can’t argue with me.”

For her, he was willing to do it. To be sick as long as they weren’t separated.

James faced Eli. “I work with volunteer rescue up here, so I have items on hand that will help with this problem. I’ll only institute treatment if you promise me that you won’t give Julia grief if she says you’re too sick to stay here. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“Here’s the plan. A dose of a diuretic. This will pull the extra fluid from your lungs. I’ll let Julia repeat the dose one time if she feels like you need it in six hours. I’m putting you on some oxygen until your levels can be normal on room air.”