“I know that, and maybe you know that. But does Rah know that?” Chance says, pulling up to Pizza by the Slice.
“Yes, he knows that,” I say, lying through my teeth. “And you know what? All of that is irrelevant. I asked you about Jeremy and Tania, so give it up.” I open my door and step out. The smell of the pizza makes me instantly hungry. I never made up for the Snickers I missed earlier this week at lunch, so I'm going to tear my slice up. I notice Jeremy's Mustang parked on the other side of the cramped lot, next to Tania's BMW. No, this trick isn't here with my man.
“Oh, it's on,” I say, slamming the car door shut and marching toward the front door. I've had enough of being kept in the dark, especially when I already know the truth. Ever since he told me he loved me last weekend, we haven't had any time to ourselves for very long. I've been looking forward to us kicking it all day, and now this heffa's messing up my moment. Following my gaze across the parking lot, Chance notices the Roadster and grabs my arm, not knowing he's causing me pain.
“Let go of me,” I say, snatching my now throbbing arm out of his hand and marching toward the restaurant. Chance's phone rings, causing him to stay behind while I march in, ready to attack.
The hot, aroma-filled air hits me like a wave but not hard enough to distract me from my mission: finding Jeremy. As I walk toward the cozy booths lining the place, I see Tania and her crew, Nellie included.
“Hey, Jayd,” Tania says. Nellie looks up from her bottled water and gives me a fake smile. She looks like she's lost about ten pounds in the past week. She didn't eat much before, and I bet since hangin' out with these girls, it's even less now.
“What's up, Nellie?” I say, ignoring Tania completely. I know it's no coincidence she's here at the same time as Jeremy, no matter how it may appear. “Have you checked your messages lately?”
“I've just been really busy. You know, homecoming stuff,” she says, sounding like the bitch she's become.
“Homecoming's over, Nellie,” I say, tired of her mantra. “Tell her, Tania. Y'all do this every year,” I say, repeating what Ms. Toni told me earlier. Someone has to open Nellie's eyes before she really gets hurt. “You take on a couple of clueless wannabes and haze them until you get bored. Isn't that right, Laura?” I say, redirecting my venom at Reid's girlfriend. They've been setting up Nellie from jump, and I'm going to prove it.
“You're just a hater,” Laura says in her worst Black-girl imitation ever. “Why don't you get over yourself and go back to the CPT or whatever you guys call it.” She tosses her long brown hair over her slightly freckled shoulders. Oh, no, this bitch didn't just dis my hometown. I want to slap the shit out of her, but she's not my immediate concernâNellie's dim-witted ass is.
“Nellie, what the hell is wrong with you?” I yell, now causing a scene. I see Jeremy coming from the bathroom headed our way. I better wrap this up so I can get back to my main priorityâhe and Tania. “This trick just insulted our home, and you still sitting here? They're playing you, girl. Can't you see that?”
“You're embarrassing me,” Nellie says between her teeth. She looks mortified, like I just walked in the spot with my house shoes on and rollers in my hair, in my bathrobe, spitting sunflower seeds on the floor.
“Embarrassing you? Have you looked in the mirror lately? You look like Whitney after Bobby, and I'm sick of your attitude,” I say as Jeremy walks up to the booth. Chance is still on the phone outside, totally unaware of the scene I've just caused. But these heffas are stringing my best friend along, and I just can't stand by and watch. Not when Tania's the one doing it. This is war, and I'm ready for battle.
“Hey, baby,” Jeremy says, putting his arm around my waist and kissing my cheek. “What's all the commotion about?”
“I'm trying to convince my girl here that Tania's a scheming bitch who's only out to hurt her,” I say, staring Nellie down and ignoring Tania's reaction. Where's Mickey when we need her? She lives for fronting chicks. “By the way,” I say, redirecting my gaze at the ringleader, “I know you're after my man.”
“Oh, sweetie,” I've already had him, remember?” she says, taking a bread stick from the basket on the table and biting the tip. I lunge at her, snatching it out of her mouth and throwing it in her face.
“You're a twisted broad, aren't you, Tania?” I say as Jeremy holds me back and Chance runs in to see what all the fuss is about.
“What the hell happened in here?” Chance says.
“I'm going to file a complaint against your little ghetto ass!” Tania yells. “First my Blackberry, now this? Anger management might do you some good.”
“Shut the hell up talking to me, Tania,” I say as Jeremy leads me away from the booth toward the front door. I guess our pizza date is ruined. “Nellie, don't trust them. They're not your real friends!”
“Can you believe that trick?” I say, breaking free of Jeremy's tight grip as we walk toward Chance's car.
“What happened?” Chance says, jogging the short distance to his car and grabbing my bags. He knows Jeremy's pissed, and Chance wants to get away from the crime scene now. He really doesn't have to leave. But I guess he wants to eat in peace. And seeing Nellie with those heffas can't be peaceful for him. He really has it bad for my girl and hates to see her with them, even if he doesn't react like me. I feel like I'm doing both our jobs.
“For what it's worth,” Chance says, walking us to Jeremy's car, “I'm with you, Jayd. Those broads aren't good for my Nellie.” He leans up against the Mustang and lights a cigarette. I hate the smell of those things. At least he's on the driver's side, next to the witch's broomstick. I wish I could make my mind key Tania's car. Lucky for her my powers don't work like that.
“What's wrong with you?” Jeremy says, opening the car door and forcing me inside. “Why can't you control your temper?” He grabs my bags from a very amused Chance.
“We'll find a way to save Nellie, don't worry,” Chance says, coming around to my side and giving me a hug. “Don't ever change, girl. And I hope Nellie realizes what a good friend she has in you.” Chance is one of my first friends at South Bay, and I love him like a brother.
“Thanks, man, and we'll talk later,” Jeremy says, opening the driver's-side door and getting in.
“No prob. And you knew you had a fiery one. That's why you like her, so don't trip too hard, bro,” Chance says, heading back across the small lot toward his car, defending me like a good big brother does. Judging Jeremy's facial expressions, it doesn't look like Chance's words had much of an impact on him. He looks hotter than I feel. But I'm still hungry.
“Since you made me leave, can we at least stop and get something else to eat?” I pout. I'm in no mood to argue with Jeremy now. And I still want to get the truth out of him about his run-in with Tania the other day, so I've got to calm his ass down, and that starts by me chilling out, which can't happen if I'm hungry.
“Not until you tell me what the hell that was all about back there,” he says, speeding down Pacific Coast Highway toward Inglewood. “What is it with you and being loud?”
“Now you're just being mean,” I say. “You can't keep me from eating. You ain't my daddy.”
“I know that. But, Jayd, for real: every time you feel like mouthing off at someone, you can't,” he says, pulling up to Fatburgers. Aw, hell, yeah. A turkey cheeseburger will definitely hit the spot.
“Why not?” I say, practically jumping out of the car. “If someone's disrespectful, they must be checked.” As we enter the packed restaurant, the loud seventies music booming out of the jukebox on the wall keeps us from finishing our conversation. Jeremy places our orders, and I find a seat outside. The moist fog actually feels good on my warm skin. I'm still flustered from our run-in and need to cool off.
“Here's your strawberry shake,” Jeremy says, handing me the oversize indulgence. “Now what are we going to do about this temper of yours?” He sounds less angry but still annoyed. “It's not good for you, nor is it always called for. You can't let Tania get a rise out of you. That's what she lives for. You've got to know how to play her. Otherwise she wins.” He sips his root beer and takes a seat.
“I don't give a damn about her rules. I just want her out of my life,” I say, sucking my thick shake through the fat straw. A chill goes down my spine, causing me to sit up straight and take note of the thought I just put into motion. That I wish Tania gone aren't just empty words. I mean them. I want her gone, just like that trick Trecee who caused all that drama with KJ. And according to my dream about Tania moving to New York, she should be on her way out.
“She will be, soon enough,” Jeremy says, almost telling me what he knows. He looks sullen, like someone just stole his bike. So he does know about the baby. But I still want him to tell me the truth.
“What do you mean by that?” I ask, readjusting myself in the hard, wire chair. Between the shake and the cool air, I'm starting to get uncomfortable.
“Nothing. Are you cold?” Jeremy asks, instinctively removing his poncho and momentarily revealing his tight stomach and chest before his Nike T-shirt falls back down over the top of his jeans. “Here.”
“Thank you,” I say, placing it over my head. It's so warm and smells like Irish Spring, just like him. “What did you mean about Tania being gone soon? Where's she going?” I hope he says New York.
“I just mean she'll have no time to be bothered with all this nonsense soon,” he says, expertly evading my question. “I'll check to see if our food's ready.” He leaves me alone to my thoughts. This dude is too good, but I know he knows. I'll have to redirect my efforts in another direction to get me some inside info. But how? Maybe after some good food I'll come up with some better ideas. For now, I'm going to enjoy my juicy burger, fries and my man.
4
The Other Side
“Here is something you can't understand/
How I can just kill a man.”
âCYPRESS HILL
B
efore dropping me off at my mom's last night, Jeremy and I had an impromptu make-out session at the beach. Needless to say, we didn't get much talking done. And with me working all day and him night-surfing with his brothers tonight, we won't get to chat too much today either. Rah wants me to come through this evening's session. I know I probably shouldn't, especially since the last time I saw him, he had me in a lip-lock. But I'm definitely going to think about it.
“Excuse me, miss. Is this seat taken?” this nice-looking elder sister says to me. The bus is packed for a Saturday morning. I wish my mom would wake up early and take me to work, but I know that's asking for a bit much. She has to get up early Monday through Friday, so the weekends are her days to sleep in.
“No, it's not,” I say, readjusting myself in the small double seat, making extra room for her. My stop's coming up soon. Thank goodness Simply Wholesome isn't far from Inglewood. I don't want to be on this cramped bus any longer than necessary.
“I gotta shake it off,”
Mariah sings, announcing a phone call from Rah. What's he doing up at seven in the morning? Usually he'd just be wrapping up a session right about now.
“What's up?” I say, instantly annoying the lady sitting next to me. She gives me a look as if to say she's disgusted with my entire generation for talking on our cells in public. Well, at least I'm not like the loud dudes at the back of the bus, cussing like sailors and not caring who hears. Mama taught me better than that. But talking on my cell's a whole other thing.
“Nothing. Just calling to see what you're doing today,” he says. Damn, he sounds good in the morning.
“I'm on my way to work,” I say. I reach up and grab the alarm string, signaling the driver to stop at La Brea and Overhill, right in front of my job. I have a few minutes to spare before clocking in, so I can catch up with him for a sec.
“Why haven't you returned my calls from yesterday? White boy keeping you busy?” he says, sounding jealous. I have to admit, I love keeping Rah on his toes with Jeremy. Being a recent victim of game playing, I should know better, but I'm sure Rah understands what he's getting himself into with me.
“You've got some nerve trying to grill me,” I say, exiting the bus. I glance back through the window, watching the old lady stretch across both sides of the seat, relieved to have the space all to herself. I know just how she feels. “How's Trish?” I say, doing a little grilling of my own.
“She's fine,” Rah says. “But not as fine as you.” Rah thinks his game is tight, but he knows the shit don't work on me.
“Whatever, Rah. Why are you calling me so early? Shouldn't you just be falling asleep?” I say, taking a seat on the bench outside the front door. I can see Alonzo and Sarah chilling in his car before we start our day. I nod a quick “what's up” at the two of them. The time always goes by faster with my two favorite coworkers working the same shift as me.
“I just wanted to get your day started off with me on your mind.” I didn't need him to call for that to happen. He's on my mind more often than not lately. Even while I was chilling last night with Jeremy, I kept thinking how Rah would have handled the situation with Tania. He would have had my back one hundred and ten percent. And Rah loves my fiery side, unlike Jeremy. I think he was about as embarrassed as Nellie looked yesterday, and if that's the case, we have a bigger problem than Tania's spawn.
“Well, thank you for the shout-out. It's much appreciated.” Shahid's immaculate black Jaguar pulls up in front of the restaurant, with Summer not far behind. I'm so glad our new shift manager, Marty, isn't here yet. She irks the hell out of us all. But apparently she is the best person for the jobâbusinesswiseâor at least that's what the employees were told.
“Will we see you tonight at the session?” Rah says. I can hear his little brother Kamal in the background asking for me. It's hard to turn both of them down, but I've had all the drama I can handle for the week. I need some peace.
“It depends,” I say, giving him a hard time. “Who's this âwe' you're talking about?”
“Me, Kamal, Nigel and your girl,” Rah says, referring to Mickey. “We get good shit done when y'all are around. For real, y'all got good vibes, especially you, Jayd. You gotta come through. It's the only time I get to kick it with you now, unless it's some sort of function coming up you need an escort for.” I'm going to do my best to keep him from coming to the Masquerade Ball. Although if Nigel's going to be there, I'm sure Rah already has a costume picked out. I know Jeremy won't be going, after all we went through with him not accompanying me to homecoming. And that's where Rah made his best moves, other than the kiss last weekend.
“I really have a lot of spirit work I need to catch up on, not to mention my English portfolio's due at our next meeting,” I say. And I'm telling the truth. Although I don't plan on being at the meeting, I do plan on turning in my completed notebook to Mrs. Malone in class that morning. I'll just tell her I have another club meeting or a counseling session or something. She'll let me slide as long as the portfolio's in good order.
“Oh. Well, you know a nigga don't want to intrude on your work and all. But if you could fit me in your schedule, holla at your boy,” Rah says, making me giggle. He can be so silly sometimes.
“I will. Now let me get to work,” I say, actually beginning to dread the long day. If I didn't have to deal with customers, it would be all right. But these bougie-ass people around here work the hell out of my nerves sometimes. A few of them are cool, though.
“All right, shawty. Get at me if you want a ride home,” he says. Now, I might just take him up on his offer.
“I'll do that,” I say before hanging up and following Shahid and Summer in.
“Good morning, Jayd,” they say simultaneously. For two people who aren't a couple, they sure do behave like one.
“Good morning,” I say as Sarah and Alonzo join us, ready to start the day. Supreme, the opener for the store, is already in the back taking inventory. We're ready to get it cracking. I'm going to call Jeremy at lunch just to see what's up with him. It sucks that we won't have time to kick it today. I really do miss our extended coffeeshop talks or just hanging out with him. I'll just have to wait until tomorrow to see him. He's supposed to pick me up from my mom's and take me to his house for dinner, but we'll see. It'll be the first time he takes me all the way home to Mama's house.
Â
After this morning's surprise call from Rah, I've been wondering if I should just go on and go to the session tonight. I can probably get a ride from Nigel or Mickey, if I really want to. But right now I want to talk to my man while I still have some time left on my lunch. Before I can dial, the phone rings, signaling a call from my dad. Here we go.
“Hey, Daddy,” I say in a voice that lets him know I'm glad he's alive and now we can hang up.
“Hey, Jayd,” he says, sounding almost the same. At least the feeling's mutual. I know I'm his least favorite kid because I'm different in his eyes. And he hates the fact that I show more loyalty to my mother's folks than his. But what else am I supposed to do? I've lived with them all my life because my parents can't get it together, and he's the main reason why. I'm sure we could use some sort of counseling or something, but it's not just anger. We'd need a whole exorcism to get rid of these family demons.
“What's up, Daddy? I'm just clocking in to work,” I say, literally taking my time card and punching it in. I put my wannabe-Coach bag under the register and grab my apron from the wall before washing my hands in the sink.
“Yeah, I forgot today was a workday for you. Listen, did you still want to take driving lessons?” he says, like we just had this conversation yesterday. I asked him if he would pay for those lessons when I turned sixteen in March, and that was months ago. What the hell?
“Uh, yeah. That was what I wanted for my sixteenth birthday present,” I remind him. “I thought you forgot.”
“Nah, I didn't forget. And you need to mind your sass, little girl,” he says, making me roll my eyes. I can't wait until I don't need money from my parents anymore. I wish I could start my own business now and just support myself. I'd move out of Mama's, get my own spot and just work and go to school. That would be heaven. But who am I kidding? Mama will never let me move now. “Well, I set it up for the next month through the company I used to work for. So give them a call and give them your schedule,” he says, taking me off guard. That's my daddy though. And, also like him, I'm sure there's a price to be paid.
“Why now? What's the catch?” I say, suspicious of his good deeds, as usual. Mama taught me well.
“Well, I just want you to get your license, that's all. Then maybe we could see a little more of you over here.” I knew it. He wants to be able to tell his family he's a great dad and that I owe him my driving freedom because he paid for it. I know it. But, whatever. If it'll get me off the bus and keep me from being dependant on others for my ride, then so be it.
“Cool. Thanks,” I say, trying to sound appreciative. “If you could just leave the info on my voice mail, I'll call when I get off.”
“Why can't you write it down now?” he says, conveniently forgetting I'm at work, even if I am on my lunch.
“Because I don't have a pen right now,” I say, telling the truth. And, this barbecue veggie burger is too messy and damned good for me to stop eating and write anything.
“Okay, Jayd. But you're getting too spoiled,” he says before hanging up. I wish that were the case. If my dad only knew all the shit I do on a daily basis. And then I work all weekend, too. If this is spoiled, then I'd rather be ripe. I think I'll call Rah for that ride after all.
“Jayd, you plan on working today?” Marty says, ruining my whole vibe. Why does she have to sweat me so hard? They're aren't even any customers right now, and I still have five minutes left before clocking back in.
“Yes, when it's my time to work,” I say, returning to making my quick phone call to Rah.
“Jayd,” she says, leaning up against the unstable metal table, making my smoothie tilt slightly, dripping on its side. “You're going to have to learn to work as a team if you want to grow here.” Is this trick serious? Like it's my life's aspiration to be a cashierâplease. Both Summer and Shahid want us all to rise above the norm.
“Look, maybe this is the job you prayed for when you were a little girl,” I say, picking up the napkin next to my cup and wiping up her mess. “But not me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I still have four more minutes left, and I have another call to make.” I push Rah's name on my phone, ignoring Marty completely. She has no choice but to leave me alone now, or so I think.
“We're going to have to talk more about your attitude, Jayd,” she says, finally walking away and giving me some privacy. Damn, she makes my butt itch.
“Jayd, what's cracking?” Rah says, sounding like I woke him from a good nap.
“I'm sorry. I was just taking you up on your offer, but if you're asleep, it's all good,” I say, feeling bad for calling. I know he's a nocturnal being.
“Nah, girl. I just dozed off for a sec,” he says. “Yeah, I got you, girl. Call me right before you get off and I'll be there.”
“Thanks, boo. Now get back to sleep,” I say. I'm so thankful Rah's back in my life, even if we can be only friends. The thing about staying friends is that there's no danger in crossing over to the other side of love: hate. I never felt both emotions so strong until I met Rah. Besides, they say the grass is always greener, or in this case, the water's bluer on the other side. But I don't know. If Rah didn't have a girlfriend and I wasn't with Jeremy, who knows where we'd be.
“Yeah, I'll see you later, shawty. Peace,” he says, hanging up the phone. Now I have to get back to work. I can't wait until my shift is over in a few hours so I can see Rah. It feels like it's been forever. I hope he's doesn't try to kiss me again. I'll try to resist, but I can't make any promises.
As I walk back into the restaurant, the line is very long, and Sarah looks like she's about to snap. That's Simply Wholesome. It's never without customers for long, and that's also what makes the day go by fast. Hopefully it'll stay busy until I get off at five. That way, Marty won't have a chance to get on me for stupid crap, and I won't have a chance to think about Rah kissing me again.
Â
It's a quarter to five, and I already sent Rah a text saying it's time to wake up and get here soon. The rest of the day flew by, thank God. And now I'm ready to shower and chill for a while.