From Brooding Boss to Adoring Dad (8 page)

“Huge ethical problem, because I don’t lie. Won’t lie. But it makes me wonder what I’d have done, or said, if I’d known for sure that his heart murmur was serious. I don’t want to be put in a position that I’d ever have to violate any kind of medical ethic, but what about the child who clearly doesn’t have the kind of advocacy he or she needs? Would I go against my ethics to take care of that child?” He stared directly at her, the deep concern showing in his eyes. “You’re a pediatrician, Red. Would you do what you had to in order to protect a child, even if it did, in some way, go against what we’ve learned is ethical in the practice of medicine?”

“To save a child?” She didn’t even have to think. Her adoptive father had gone against convention to save her. Because of him, in her life the children always came first. That’s why she was here, in Jamaica. “I’d do what I had to do. My father has always believed that our duty to our fellow man is a privilege and an honor, but he’s always said that privilege and honor don’t come without sacrifices. To save a child, I would … will … make the sacrifices I have to.” She thanked God every day of her life that her father had done what he had to do to save her.

“Wise man,” Adam said, almost reverently.

“He is.” And there was still need for Algernon Glover’s wisdom, even if he didn’t believe it to be so.

“And I’ll bet he’s patient, too. Not like me, because I’m so damned angry that someone could be so irresponsible I want to kick something.” He eyed the palm tree, opted not to. “It doesn’t make sense to me.”

“It happens, though,” Erin said. “Parents, guardians. adults in general don’t always act in the best interests of their children. But for Tadeo, we’ve got to find a way around it. This Trinique … would she have some influence with Miss Reyes?”

“Trinique has her own influence with the people in her little corner of the world. But would she convince Pabla that Tadeo needs some medical tests? Hell, I don’t know. And it’s an irrelevant point anyway, because I don’t think she’s coming back for a while. Davion said his aunt has taken a turn for the worse and Trinique’s going to stay there for as long as she has to. Meaning.” He shrugged. “I don’t even know what that means except that, besides the two of us, there’s no one here to fight for Tadeo.”

“You really care for him, don’t you?”

“He’s a good kid. Reminds me of myself when I was his age. Always underfoot, always inquisitive. I have great
parents, but they were away a lot when I was a kid. My dad traveled on business, my mom was a surgeon and on call most of the time. So my grandfather stepped in. He was the one who answered the questions, taught me how to get along in the world. In fact, when I think back on my childhood, it’s my grandfather who comes to mind first, because he was my greatest influence. Like I said, my parents were great, but to me they were always off in the background somewhere. So it was my grandfather’s solid influence I needed, he was my best friend. And I don’t think Tadeo has that anywhere, from anyone. Definitely not from Pabla.”

“He has that from you, Coulson. And you may have to fight Pabla to maintain that place in his life. So, are you willing to do that for him? ”

Adam nodded. “Whatever it takes, because it’s like he’s out there in the world, trying to figure it out on his own. I know Pabla lets him wander around all hours of the day and night. Probably doesn’t have any idea where he is, and probably doesn’t even care. Half the time, when I’m tending bar at Trinique’s, Tadeo will be waiting outside on the step for me when I get off work, or he’ll be sleeping in the hammock I have strung up at my cottage.”

Then it was a good thing he had Coulson because somehow, some way, she trusted with all her heart that Coulson would come through for the boy no matter what else happened. It made her feel better believing in that. “I think the only thing we can do at this point is watch him. If we see symptoms of
anything
happening, then we try talking to Pabla again. Or contact the authorities if she won’t cooperate.”

“Not we, Red. Like I said before, you’re not involved in this. And dealing with Pabla could get ugly.”

That stung. Especially since she was already so emotionally
involved. “But I am involved, Coulson. You drew me in and what do you expect me to do? Just stand back and watch a bad situation get worse? Watch it and not do anything to fix it? Because that’s not me.”

“I know it’s not you. And this isn’t anything personal. But I’m a solo act here, Red, and I want to keep it that way.”

“Even after you were the one who wanted me to work in your clinic, and even go with you to talk to Pabla?”

“Even after all that. And I appreciate it. But we’re not attached at the hip. We have our separate ways to go. And like I said, Pabla has a reputation for getting … ugly.”

“I don’t need someone protecting me, Coulson, if that’s what you’re trying to do. I can take care of myself with Pabla Reyes. Probably as well as I can set up a hospital and run it. So don’t worry about me, because I’m not about to attach myself to anybody’s hip. Least of all yours!” Still, she did see his side of it, and he was right. As much as she wanted to be involved with Tadeo, Coulson was better suited to handle the situation. So maybe it was time she put up her own dividing line because it was so easy to get drawn over to his side. Otherwise she’d never finish what she’d come here to start. Did Coulson see that in her? Did he see how easily she got emotionally involved? Or was him pushing her back to her own work a sign of him softening toward the hospital? She certainly hoped so. “Oh, and just so you know, the architects will be here day after tomorrow and, with any luck, we’ll be starting renovations within the next couple of weeks. So you won’t have to worry about me getting too close to your hip again as I’ll be pretty busy with my own concerns. The first one being the transformation of the hospital building.”

He flinched visibly. “Meaning?”

“Meaning blue, for starters. Kids deserve blue, not white.”

“You’re not serious … blue?”

“Very serious, and very blue. Studies show that it’s the favorite color among children, and while I haven’t decided the exact shade of blue I want to use, I thinking something bright, happy. And each of the outbuildings … red, purple, green, orange, yellow. I’m very serious about that, too! Shortly your plain old white is going to turn into a rainbow.” Spinning, she strolled off in the direction of her medical compound, feeling a little optimistic that Coulson’s sentiment toward the hospital really was changing for the better. Still, seeing his reaction to the colors she’d chosen did sting a little as she didn’t want her decisions to slap him, but that’s exactly what she’d done, and she didn’t feel good about it. In the end, no matter what she did, he was always going to look at her as the person who had stolen his dream. There might be easy moments between them from time to time, maybe even times when they worked together again. But overall they were at such great odds she couldn’t see much of a truce in the offing. He kept saying it wasn’t personal. But it was. This situation with Adam Coulson was very personal.

T
HREE
days, three nights and they’d avoided each other, not so much by design but by happenstance. Which was hard to do, considering how they lived on the same plot of land, separated by only a few palm trees and some sand. But she was keeping to her side of the imaginary line and he to his. He’d taken down the ropes, even though that line between them was still implied. At least, it was to him, and she was doing a good job of observing it, too. Of course, she had no reason to come over to his side, and while he might have been interested in watching the progress to her hospital, he just couldn’t look because … blue! Selling the hospital was one thing, but painting it blue. He cringed thinking about it. The thing was, he didn’t hate blue. It was the color of the ocean, of the sky … nice color. But on a hospital?

Actually, it was more the symbolism of painting the hospital blue than it was the color, but it just struck him as wrong. Or maybe wrong because he’d always seen the hospital as white, couldn’t imagine it being anything other than what it was, couldn’t see it being any color other than what it was. OK, so maybe he was being stubborn about this. But he didn’t have to like blue.

Although being white, the way it was now, it was also doomed to being empty. Sure, he was overreacting to the
changes. Especially as she was doing a noble thing, turning an empty building into something good and useful. Misguided but noble, and deep down he was cheering her on. But she was getting to him. Making him think about her. Making him wish for things he knew he couldn’t or shouldn’t have. The honest truth was, Erin Glover fascinated him and he’d caught himself watching her from afar too many times now. Not a good sign. He’d pushed her away all those days ago for his own good, not hers. She distracted him and he caught himself wanting to be distracted. Caught himself not minding being attached at the hip. And he was certainly aware enough to know that the color blue was only a symptom for something else he couldn’t diagnose. Something he didn’t even want to think about, except it kept pelting him from every direction. No matter where he went, Erin’s influence was already there. No matter where he looked, something there reminded him of her. Categorically, he denied interest, romance, love or anything like it. He wasn’t even interested in her that way. Not now, not in the future. But she was the flame, he was the moth—a situation out of his control. One that made him grumpy as hell.

“It’s only a color,” Davion said. He was sitting cross-legged in the sand with a medical text spread out in front of him. Adam was sprawled in a red-and-orange-striped canvas cabana chair, his back to the hospital, more specifically to Erin, working with Davion on basic pharmacology.

“A color I’ll have to look at every time I set foot out my door. Or look out the clinic window.”

“I’ve heard people talking about it. They like it. Say it’s different. The consensus is it’s a nice color, better than the boring white.” He grinned. “You’re the only one around here who hates it.”

“Well, everybody else can like it all they want but I’m
entitled to my opinion. And I may have to dock my boat to the south and live on it so I won’t have to look at it.” He wanted to glance over his shoulder, wanted to catch a glimpse of the progress. Or of Erin. A habit he had to stop, he thought as he purposely twisted in his chair and took one quick peek in that direction, trying to be sly about it then immediately chiding himself for doing so. Moth to the flame, damn it!

Davion chuckled. “You can look all you want, but she’s not over there.”

“Who?” he snapped. “And I’m not looking at anything.”

“Erin. She’s not over there right now. And I’ve seen you looking for her every time you think I’m not watching. But just so you know, I think she was going back to my mother’s house to get her things. She’s moving into one of the cottages, taking her belongings over there a few at a time. Tadeo’s helping her.”

“She takes my hospital
and
Tadeo!”

Grinning, Davion shook his head. “She’s really getting to you, isn’t she?”

“She’s disrupting my routine. Bothering me.”

“Seems to me she’s been staying out of your way these past few days.”

“Whose side are you on?” Adam snapped. “I’ve already lost Tadeo, but you, too?”

“I wasn’t aware there were sides to choose. Oh, and just so you’ll know, I promised to help her paint later on.
Blue.”

“Et tu,
Davion?”

Davion chuckled. “Weren’t we talking about beta-blockers?”

Beta-blockers—a class of drug used for the management of cardiac arrhythmias and cardio-protection after
a myocardial infarction … heart attack. Also used in treatment of hypertension. Which he was going to suffer if he kept on fretting over Erin. “OK, beta-blocker or, as they’re sometimes referred to, beta-adrenergic blocking agents, beta-adrenergic antagonists, or …”

“Beta antagonists,” Davion supplied.

Adam nodded, and smiled in spite of his bad mood. “Good. You’ve been doing your reading.”

“Trying to. Sometimes it’s not easy, with so many things going on. And.” He frowned.

“And what?”

Davion shook his head. “Nothing.”

“Tell me what it is, Davion.”

“It’s you. You’re so … preoccupied. Sometimes I feel like I’m interrupting you, maybe wasting your time.”

Adam shut his eyes, drew in a deep breath. Davion was right. He’d been fixed on the color blue, obsessed with being grumpy, for three days now, almost to the exclusion of everything else. “I’m not a very flexible person,” he admitted, knowing that was a huge understatement. He was the proverbial immoveable force. Once he fixed on something, he didn’t often budge. Which had brought about the demise of his marriage, and he admitted that freely. At all costs, he’d wanted to be a doctor in Jamaica. Had wanted that since his student days when he’d come here with a traveling medical group. And the cost of getting what he wanted had been huge. But being inflexible … Davion was too important to him to get caught up in that.

“Look, I’m sorry. None of this should be affecting you. Right now you need to be concentrating on your studies so you’ll be ahead by the time you get to medical school. And I think that scholarship will be coming through sooner than we thought. So study fast.” That’s how he had to tame his grumpiness. Look at that ugly blue building and think of
Davion in medical school because of it. Think about the kind of doctor Davion was going to be and the amazing things he would accomplish in his career. In a situation where
he
wasn’t going to get everything he wanted, getting Davion to medical school made all his grumblings seem pretty damned lame. Which meant it was time to embrace blue and everything it stood for. For Davion’s sake, even for his own sake. Fix himself on the things he could have, the things he could do, and let the rest of it go.

Drawing in a deep breath, Adam gritted his teeth toward his newfound determination. “So, beta-blockers reduce the effects of adrenaline and other stress hormones occurring in the body.” He reeled off a list of some of the best examples on the market. “Any questions?”

Davion nodded. “When are you going to really fix things with Erin? Quit being so back and forth about the hospital and just get on with it? You need to, since you’re going to be living right next door to each other. If you don’t, you’re going to need to take a beta-blocker yourself with the way you twist yourself into a knot every time she makes a change to the hospital.”

“The one next door to me? That’s the cabin she took?” he asked, trying to feign disinterest when all he could think about now was Erin stepping out her cottage door, standing on the porch, morning sun catching her hair … Damn, what an image! Moth to flame.

Davion nodded. “And she’s going to paint it yellow, by the way.”

“Yellow, not white?”
Next-door neighbors.
Of all the other cabins she owned, why that one? Why the one he would see every time he looked out his bedroom window into … her bedroom window? “OK, so I can live with yellow.” But he was going to have to hang blinds in his window or plant a hedge row to obstruct the view.

Davion shut his book, picked it up, and stood. “Let’s do this later, when you’re not so preoccupied.”

“I’m not preoccupied,” he protested.

“In your list of beta-blockers, you left out carvedilol. That’s one of the better examples, and I don’t think you’d be forgetting it if you weren’t so.” he grinned “… preoccupied.” Davion sauntered off, in the direction of the clinic, humming a tune. Halfway there, he turned back, shouted to Adam, “It’s showing on you. No hiding it.” Then he disappeared into the clinic.

“Hiding what?” Erin asked, stepping up behind him.

Adam glanced up, drew in a sharp breath. “The fact that I hate blue.”

“You’re still fixed on that?” She stood above him, casting her shadow over his face.

“Trying not to be, but every time I look over there the color jumps out and bites me like it’s a sand flea. You know it’s there, hiding in the sand, waiting to get you. You don’t really think that it will, though, but then, out of nowhere, you feel the bite, see the red blister pop up. It’s not a major thing but it’s annoying as hell.”

“And I’m sorry about the sand flea, Coulson. That’s why I’m here, hopefully to prevent you from getting bitten again. I’m taking a walk, trying to figure out where I can build a riding stable, and I wanted to apologize.”

“Apologize for what?”

“For getting in your way. I should have come here and told you what I was planning before jumping in with both feet. You know, soften the blow. So I wanted to mention that I’m going to be putting in a riding stable, but not on this side of the property. Thought you might have an opinion on where it should go since you live so close. So it won’t be another sand flea waiting to get you.”

“If I give you my opinion, will you actually take it?”

She smiled. “Maybe. And maybe I should have asked for your opinion on some of the other things I’m doing since they will have an impact on you, too, and I’m sorry I didn’t. But … when I saw the property advertised for sale, it was an answer to everything I’d hoped for, and from that moment on it was like I had to start pushing and push hard because I finally had my opportunity. This hospital is so important to me, Coulson. In one way or another, I’ve been planning it since I was a little girl.
The Algernon Glover Hospital for Children.
I learned a long time ago that if you want something, you shouldn’t wait to go after it because, if you do, you might lose it. Or lose something more important while you’re waiting. Anyway, I didn’t want to lose this chance and I think my inclination is always to leap first, then look. But I should have been more respectful of your feelings because I do know that the beginning of my dream is the ending of yours, and for that I truly am sorry.”

“Enough to paint the building white again?” he teased.

“You’re so traditional.”

“In most ways, I guess I am.” The funny thing was, he’d never considered himself traditional, but now that Erin was pointing it out to him, he could see it. He could also see how being so traditional made him inflexible. Or boring. At least, in comparison to Erin. “And I’m the one who should be apologizing to you. You stepped into this deal with the expectation that I would be somewhat pleasant about it, and I’ve been nothing but a jerk. But I’ve meant it when I’ve told you it’s not personal, because it’s not, Red. I think your idea is admirable, though I still think this is the wrong place to put your dream.”

“You don’t know my dream, Coulson. It’s so much more than … than a traditional hospital.”

“You mean a hospital with a riding stable? I’ll admit that’s a twist I wouldn’t have expected.”

She nodded. “That’s only a small part of it. I also want bicycle paths and a boat that’s worthy of an ocean adventure. I want a beach where the children can go wading in the ocean and have a picnic. Maybe even a little petting zoo of sorts where the children can be involved with animals.”

“It sounds more like you’re creating a park, than a hospital.”

“I
am … we
are, my father and me. This hospital isn’t about being sick. It’s a place where long-term, chronically ill children can come and be normal kids. They’ll receive the best medical care, but they won’t be confined to a typical institutional room and have only hospital corridors to wander through and starched white uniforms to look at. They’ll have all of this … a place to play, a place to find peace of mind. A place to be children. Most of all, a place where being sick doesn’t occupy every breath they take every last minute of the day. This hospital is a retreat as much as it is a hospital and I knew, the minute I saw the photos, this was the perfect place for it.”

Well, he hadn’t expected that. Not at all. And he did have to admit, at first impression, it sounded like a good idea. Made him feel quite sheepish for the way he’d been acting. “Why didn’t you tell me all this before?” he asked.

“When I was a little girl … let’s just say that I didn’t have a normal life for a while, and every time I made a wish or had plans, and talked about something I wanted, it didn’t happen. Didn’t come true. After a while I learned that if I wanted something badly enough to keep it to myself. It’s a silly eccentricity, I know. But I didn’t want anything to jinx this because.” She paused, bit her lip, shut her eyes. Drew in a ragged breath. “Because it’s important.”

There was something more to it. He could see it, feel it. “Why, Red? Why is it so important. And urgent?”

“Because I want my father to see the bronze name plaque on the hospital. I want him to see what his influence has done.”

All sorts of things were running through his mind, none with a good outcome. “Is he sick?” he asked, gently. “Your father, is he …?”

She shook her head. “Not sick. But going blind. Soon. When I was a little girl, my circumstances were difficult. My parents gave me up, and for a couple of years I was pretty much lost. When I met my father, he wasn’t looking to adopt a little girl but over time that became his focus. Only it wasn’t easy. In this modern age, there are still prejudices. Single man adopting a little girl. Black man adopting a white girl. He fought the system for two years, trying to make it happen, and our social worker, Mrs Meecham, kept telling him that she had faith it would. But my father, who’s a bit of a pragmatist, and somewhat traditional, the way you are, kept telling her he’d have to see it to believe it, that he’d learned never to believe anything until he set eyes on it and saw it for himself. He had to
see
the adoption papers. And I know he has to see this hospital, see his name on it, because if he doesn’t.” She cleared her throat. “He’s sad right now. Sits in a dark room, doesn’t get involved any more. He’s helping do some of the administrative work for the hospital, making phone calls and arrangements, whatever he can do from his study, and I’d hoped that would make it real for him, but so far it hasn’t. He’s not involved the way he should be, the way I’d hoped he would be. And I’m afraid he’s giving up, little by little.”