From the Ashes (23 page)

Like an idiot, Jesse had never programmed Tomas’s parents’ number in his phone. “But I’ll be at their place soon.” The train pulled up to the station closest to Tomas’s house, and Jesse stepped off.

“Why are you going to your boyfriend’s parents’ house? I thought you were heading home.” Michael sounded distracted, as if he was listening to the radio more closely than he was Jesse.

That’s why Jesse didn’t feel guilty for answering just as absentmindedly, “Their place is home.”

Chapter Nineteen

Jesse walked through the backyard to Tomas’s parents’ house. He petted Chardonnay as he went, his fingers tangling in her damp fur to reach the warm skin underneath.

Chilled, Jesse pulled his jacket tighter around his shoulders. The drizzle they’d had all day was kicking up to actual rain, and though he’d dried off a bit on the train, Jesse was wet all over again. He knocked before he could lose his nerve.

The door opened, and Diego stood on the threshold. His face—so like his brother’s—was tense. He stepped his feet apart.

“Is your mom home?” Jesse lifted his chin. “Does she know about the shootings this afternoon?”

Diego’s gaze flickered. His eyes were hard, unforgiving, but they were also dark and long-lashed like his brother’s. “Go away.” Diego ground his teeth.

Jesse rubbed his arms, so annoyed he wanted to shove Diego out of the way. He would have too, if Diego didn’t outweigh him by forty pounds. “No. I want to find out if Tomas is okay. Does your mom know anything?”

He saw it then, in the way Diego pinched his lips together and how his brown skin grayed. Mrs. Perez didn’t know if Tomas was okay. If she did, Diego wouldn’t be so scared.

“Why can’t you leave my brother alone?” Diego leaned forward as if he might advance on Jesse and throw a punch, but in the end he held steady in the doorway. Apparently, guarding his house against the gay threat was more important than beating Jesse up.

“He asked me to live with him.” Jesse stepped closer, well and truly pissed that Diego was being so deliberately stupid. “And you think I was the first guy he’s been with?” Maybe that was cutting too close to the bone, but Jesse didn’t care. “Tomas is twenty-five. Believe me, he hadn’t been keeping it in his pants his whole life.”

Diego snarled, evidently in disgust, but he didn’t contradict Jesse.

“So, you haven’t heard anything about the shooting?” It was all over Diego’s face, but Jesse still had to ask.

“No.” Diego backed away a step and reached for the door like he’d slam it.

Jesse wedged his foot against the weather stripping. “Let me in.”

For a split second Diego looked mutinous. Jesse was pretty sure Diego was under strict orders not to beat the shit out of him, but he looked close to losing his temper.

Luckily, Maria took that moment to come into the kitchen behind Diego and saw them standing in the doorway. “Oh, Jesse.” She pushed past her brother and dragged Jesse into a hug.

He nearly tripped on the step as she tugged him into the house. When his arm brushed Diego’s front, it was like he was touching Tomas, but not. Jesse shivered involuntarily.
Ew.

The television was on in the living room, set to the news, the volume cranked. Leaning forward on the couch, Mr. Perez watched the screen. Tomas’s mother was on the phone.

“Here.” Maria drew a couple chairs away from the dining room table and set them in front of the TV.

Grateful, Jesse fell into the chair. He wasn’t sure he was up to sitting on the couch, especially since Diego grumpily took a seat next to his father. Once Diego had stopped glaring and started watching the news, Jesse could see that Diego and his father tilted their head to the exact same angle.

“So…” Jesse leaned into Maria’s side to whisper. “No news yet?”

Maria shook her head. “Whenever things like this happen, the fire department’s lines get swamped.” She helped herself to a handful of the potato chips that were open on the table and took a sip from a can of soda. “A lot of times we hear from Tomas before we get through to the station.”

Jesse let out a breath. Maria’s laid-back attitude calmed him a little. “So this happens sometimes? I mean, it’s happened before?”

“Well, yeah. Every once in a while. Maybe once a year, sometimes twice, we hear about a firefighter injured on the scene, and we worry.” She gave Jesse a quick rub on the arm. “But at least we worry together.”

In the kitchen, Mrs. Perez was talking into the phone. She covered the mouthpiece with her hand and shouted into the living room in Spanish. Immediately, Mr. Perez lowered the volume. Mrs. Perez spoke to the person on the other end of the line in Spanish, but the relief in her voice was obvious. Hand over her heart, she closed her eyes. “
Gracias. Muchas gracias.
”

She told the room what they already knew from her expression, that Tomas was fine. Jesse didn’t even notice which language she was speaking because he understood her every word.

Maria threw her arms around him, and Jesse hugged her back. On the couch, Diego leaned forward, elbows on his knees and head in his hands. His father rubbed his back a couple times, and then held his palm between Diego’s shoulder blades.

From his backpack, Jesse’s phone buzzed. He unzipped his outer pocket and checked. It was from Tomas.

Sorry I missed your text. Slammed this shift. Miss you. Breakfast tomorrow?

Jesse smiled at the screen.

“Was that him?” Diego’s eyes were pure challenge, but his voice was nervous.

“Yeah.” Jesse felt a little guilty Tomas had texted him before his mother. Maybe Tomas hadn’t known how worried everyone was. Jesse bet that things were different when you were in the thick of things than when you were on the outside waiting.

Predictably, Mrs. Perez scowled at her phone. “I must have missed his call.” She sniffed, obviously hurt that her youngest son hadn’t thought to contact her first.

Jesse fell against the backrest, exhausted from the rapid hit of relief. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a couple small faces peeking from behind the corner.

“
Mi’jo
,” Maria said, holding out her arms. “It’s okay. You can come in now.”

Pedro and Nelson walked somberly into the room. Jesse guessed they’d been banished to one of the bedrooms to watch cartoons while the adults waited to hear about Tomas.

Maria pulled Nelson onto her lap and cuddled Pedro close to her side. She kissed them both. “
Tio
’s fine.”

Nelson’s eyes were wide and scared, but Pedro shrugged and looked in Jesse’s direction. “You still got that dog?”

Diego tensed, though Jesse did his best to ignore it. “Yep. She’s been a lot better lately too. We could see if you could pet her if you want.”

Subtly, Jesse checked Diego’s posture to see if he was about to start yelling. Diego didn’t acknowledge Jesse’s existence, but he didn’t fly into a rage, either. He seemed to have decided that Jesse was a fixture, like an ugly rug you wished were gone but you live with because you need something to cover a spot on the floor.

“That’s a great idea. I’ll help.” Maria pushed out of her seat, lifting Nelson as she rose. To the room at large, she said, “We’ll be outside.”

Jesse followed Maria out.

When the door closed behind them, she said, “You know, I’m glad you stayed. After the fight, I mean.”

Jesse checked the windows of the Perez house. The shades were down, making the glass look like two closed eyes. Head down, he untangled Char’s leash. “Seems like you’re the only one.”

“No way.” Maria led the kids closer. “Tomas wants you here. So do I.”

When Jesse squatted to hold tight on Char’s neck, Nelson, Pedro and Maria squatted too.

Maria held her palm under Char’s muzzle, letting the big dog sniff her hand. “We’re all glad you’re here. Even Diego.” She glanced up, her gaze full of mischief. “Really deep down somewhere inside.”

Jesse narrowed his eyes, though his lip twitched up at the edge. Even if Maria was full of shit, he appreciated that she was trying. “Yeah, I doubt that.”

The boys scooted closer, out from behind Maria. “She’s so big.” Nelson’s eyes were wide.

Smiling, Jesse ruffled Nelson’s hair. “Yeah, she’s big, but she’s also a scaredy cat.”

Chardonnay rubbed her nose into Jesse’s side, her tongue lolling out. Whenever the kids eased closer, she’d scoot away.

“Here, hold your hand out like this.” Jesse reached for Nelson’s hand and turned it palm up. He did his best to open Nelson’s curled baby fingers. “Let her smell you.”

With tentative steps, Char worked her way out from behind Jesse’s back. She lifted her big nose, smelling her way. When she snuffled onto Nelson’s hand, she made this whimpering sound and started licking his fingers.

“Why’s she doing that?” Nelson giggled.

Jesse grinned. “Did you wash your hands after dinner?”

Nelson shook his head.

“She probably smells your food.” Maria kept an arm around Nelson’s tiny shoulders.

“She’s licking me.” Nelson wriggled closer to the dog. “Does that mean she likes me?”

Pedro gathered closer, pushing his hand under Chardonnay’s face. Maria kept a watchful eye, but since it was clear Char wasn’t about to start barking, Maria backed away a couple steps.

“Does she like me?” Pedro tickled under Chardonnay’s muzzle. His eyes were hard like his father’s, but his grin was pure childish happiness.

Jesse whispered, “Yeah, that means she likes you,
mi’jo
.” He probably sounded like an idiot slipping in Spanish like Tomas’s family did, but around the little boys he didn’t feel quite so stupid.

“Can I throw the ball for her?” Pedro rubbed his slobbery hand on his jeans.

“Sure thing.” Jesse let go of her collar.

Chardonnay kissed the boys’ faces, and they giggled like crazy.

Tomas unhooked the Bluetooth from his ear when he got home. Not having had a chance to make any calls until morning, he’d spent the entire drive calming his mother.

Exhausted, he rubbed his eyes. The morning sun tracked low on the horizon, dim enough he’d have no trouble falling asleep. At the end of the walkway, his parents’ door was slightly ajar. An invitation for him to come inside. But he didn’t want to go to his parents’ house, not even to reassure his mother. Tomas only wanted to see Jesse.

When he’d heard that there’d been a shooting at a U District coffee shop, he’d been so fucking scared. Sure, it had been in the afternoon, and Jesse usually worked mornings, but Jesse could have been at Speedy Coffee for all kinds of reasons. Filling in for someone else, visiting friends.

Michael wasn’t Tomas’s best friend or anything, but he would have been sad if the guy had been shot. Or Henri. They were part of Tomas’s life now, for better or worse, and Tomas hadn’t wanted to lose either of them.

Quietly, he opened his front door. It was Jesse’s day off, and he didn’t want to wake him.

“You’re home.” Jesse came out of the bathroom, his cheeks pink and his hair damp from a shower. He wore a T-shirt he’d borrowed from Tomas right after the fire and never given back. Under that, he had on nothing but a pair of loose gray boxer briefs. Laying a hand on Tomas’s chest, Jesse smiled. “You’re okay.”

“Of course.” Tomas tried to smile, but the sight of Jesse overwhelmed him. “I was so worried about you.” Tomas pulled Jesse close and covered Jesse’s mouth with his own.

Jesse tasted like toothpaste, and his body was slim and supple. His cock pressed into Tomas’s hip.

Kissing Jesse the whole time, Tomas pushed off his jacket. He backed Jesse toward the bed, dragging off his shirt and unbuckling his belt. Jesse helped, tugging at Tomas’s jeans, getting his dick free.

“Oh God. Don’t stop,” Jesse said, falling back onto the bed.

Tomas crawled on top and lifted Jesse’s shirt. Pulling it above Jesse’s nipples, Tomas lapped each one. Jesse’s chest was smooth and pale, and flushed near his neck. Tomas got the fabric up over his head but kept the shirt stretched across the back of his shoulders.

He pressed their chests together. Emotions crashed over him—relief, love, desire. Until that day, he’d been scared to tell Jesse he loved him, but hearing about that shooting, those few, panicked minutes when Tomas hadn’t known the name of the coffee shop, he’d prayed like a little boy that Jesse was okay. All he could think about was how he’d never said the words. At least not when Jesse was awake enough to hear them.

“Jess.” He raised his head so he could look into Jesse’s eyes. They were blown wide with lust, but still so sweet. “You know I love you, right?”

Jesse nodded, blinking hard as if he might cry. His voice cracked when he said, “I love you too.” Jesse ran his hands up and down Tomas’s sides. His palms were warm and dry.

“You talked to your mom, right?” Jesse said.

It was a testament to how turned on he was that Tomas’s erection didn’t falter at the mention of his mother. “Yeah.” He kissed Jesse’s neck, hoping Jesse would shut up about his family when they were about to have sex.

“Oh, okay. She was worried.” Jesse wrapped his legs around Tomas’s back and grabbed his ass.

“You spoke to her?” Tomas rolled them onto their sides.