Fur Magic Boxed Set: Talisman, Sage, Fawn, Lola: Paranormal Romantic Comedy (26 page)

Chapter 14

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Dagda croaked. “I came all the way out here for this?” She brought the end of the broomstick down on top of Bianca’s head. A resounding crack followed and Dagda cursed under her breath. She’d managed to break the end of her broomstick in two.

That’s going to leave a mark.
I couldn’t help the mirth which twisted inside me. I was worried about Penelope, worried sick actually, but Dagda was a force to be reckoned with. An amusing force. A butt ugly force. But a savior nonetheless.

We could create a theoretical equation. The strength of a broomstick is equal to and no greater than the force applied added to the density of the top of Bianca’s cranium.

That might be the best joke you’ve ever told me.
I licked my lips and stifled a chuckle.

Bianca gripped her head between her palms and groaned. “Okay, lady, you have no idea who you’re dealing with.” Her warning was delivered in a low whine of pain.

“No, sweet cheeks, you’ve got no idea. That’s what’s so shocking. What do they teach young witches nowadays? Does history mean nothing? Defer to your elders whippersnapper!” Dagda waggled the broken end of the broomstick, then tossed it aside. It clattered against the trunk of a tree and fell to the ground.

“You’re a witch,” Bianca hissed, sitting a little straighter. “Perhaps you can help me. I’m running from an evil witch named Penelope DeLacroix. I just managed to escape by the skin of my teeth. She’s back there in my mansion. Surely, you can cast a spell on her and stop her before she gets away with her wicked mission?”

“Your mansion?” Dagda asked, folding her arms and tapping her foot. She obviously had hip problems, because the tap was more of a patter.

“Yes, it’s right up the hill.” Bianca pointed, without the foggiest idea that she’d just dug her already deep grave, ten feet deeper.

“I think you mean Arwen Silverchime’s mansion,” Dagda replied, coolly.

Bianca’s eyes widened in the dark and she let go of her head. “All right, who are you? How do you know Arwen Silverchime?”

“Dagda Cerridwyn. For heaven’s sakes. I said that already. And I’m here to stop you, not help you, wretched Chokecherry. You’re coming with me.” Dagda reached down and grabbed Bianca by the elbow.

She dragged Bianca to her feet and marched her forward a few steps. She was pretty strong for an old lady. I just stood back and admired the fireworks. Bianca’s eyes flashing daggers, her chest rising and falling with her angry breaths.

I stepped out of the darkness and joined her. Sage landed beside me.

Where are you going to take her?
I had to ask Dagda the question and hoped she’d take pity on her unlikely sidekick and let me and Sage in on the gag.

The ancient witch met my gaze. “Back to my place first. For cauldron and chill.”

Bianca gasped.

“I’m kidding, relax,” she said with a wrinkly smile. Who knew the old bat had a sarcastic sense of humor underneath the miles of gray skin. “You wicked witches never have a good sense of humor. I don’t know why I bother.” Dagda wiggled her by the arm and Bianca jerked around, still in her semi-dazed state. The spell and the broomstick bashing had served to turn her into a marionette without the strings.

That’s a doll.
Sage put in.
Not unlike the white furry one whose butt you sniff.

Huh?

A marionette without strings.

Seriously?

Dagda turned back to me. “I’m taking her to the council. She must go before them and be tried for her crimes. Depending on their decision, she’ll be stripped of her magic or banished from Shadowcreek for good. Or both. I will testify. And so will you, feline.”

She pointed a craggy finger at me.

That’s the best news I’ve had in years.

I sat down. Relief rushed through my chest. Now I could focus on Penelope’s health and safety. Hopefully, Lola had completed her task and Penelope was already okay.

“Are you seriously talking to a cat, right now?” Bianca asked, shaking her head. “And thinking he’s going to answer you? You’re a psycho.”

“Just you wait till I get my hands on that Grandmother of yours. Then we’ll see who’s a psycho,” Dagda replied. “Come on you, let’s go. You’ve got a trial to attend to. Prison orange will exactly match the shade of your Nice & Easy hairdo.”

“I don’t think so.” Damien stepped from beneath the trees, tall, meaty, everything that would probably stop Dagda Cerridwyn.

Dagda cackled.

Was that confidence or arrogance?

“And you think you can stop me, beef wagon?” Dagda asked.

Beef wagon, that’s a good one. I call dibs on that
, I sent to Sage. I frowned and glanced left. Sage was gone. You hear me, Sage?

Uh, I’m kind of in the middle of something right now.
His thoughts had that tinge of fear. Sage’s fear was special. It was iron strong and rough around the edges.

I looked over at Damien and my insides went squiggly.

Damien had his grimy hands around Sage’s body. He started to squeeze, his eyes resting on Dagda’s face. “You’re next.”

“Let go of the majestic bird, you cretin. If you know what’s good for you. But then again, I’ve heard things. Things about the level of your intelligence. Low levels,” she taunted as she made a clucking noise with her tongue.

Help him!
I yelled at Dagda.
Help Sage before Damien turns him into owl jelly.

Thank you for that wonderful image, Talisman. I can always rely on you to make me feel better about my current situation.

I’m coming, Sage!

Maybe I could at least slow down the impending avian execution with a little bit of the Stout treatment.

“Don’t bother,” Dagda said.

I didn’t heed her advice this time. I scrambled across the forest floor and pounced. I dug my claws into Damien Chokecherry’s muscly forearm and dragged him down. He yelped and let go of Sage with one hand, but he didn’t release him fully.

Peck him! Help a cat out here.

Sage made his best attempt at attacking Damien’s flesh, but it was no use. The man was too strong, and Sage’s time had almost run out.

It was an honor, Talisman. An honor.

No!

“Oh for heaven’s sake,” Dagda said, then sighed. “Enough with the dramatics. It’s like the circus, with smaller elephants.” She pointed her finger at Damien.

He froze, wide-eyed, then took two steps back, gasping for air. He clawed at his throat and looked around.

“What did you do?” Bianca yelled. “What did you do to my brother?”

“Everyone needs to take a Valium. I just knocked the air from his lungs and it isn’t permanent. Relax, it will go away in a second,” Dagda replied, then turned a heated gaze on Damien, “but only if he gets far enough away from the owl. I’m kind of becoming attached to that birdbrain.”

Damien dropped Sage, who landed with a
fa-lump
on a pile of dirt and leaves. He thrashed around, getting his bearings.

“What?” Bianca echoed.

Damien simply pointed at his throat and choked.

“That’s right,” Dagda said, and cackled again. “I didn’t put a spell on him. I put a protection spell on the bird. He comes near the owl and he won’t be able to breathe properly. He’ll get just enough oxygen to stay alive, but will constantly feel like he’s choking to death. It’s kind of like a restraining order. For douche bags.”

How do you know about restraining orders? Aren’t you ancient?
I asked, while hurrying over to check on Sage.

“I might be old, but I manage to keep in touch with the laws of my country, thank you very much,” Dagda replied, waggling her magic finger at me in reprimand.

The owl straightened and ruffled his feathers, then turned to Damien.
I think I’m going to follow him around from now on.

Damien had heard it all, at least the human spoken bits of it. He looked from Dagda to the Sage, and paled. Maybe he saw the wicked intent in the owl’s eyes.

“And so, the hunter shall become the hunted,” Dagda said, with a grand sweeping gesture.

Damien had had enough, he turned and trotted off into the woods.

I batted Sage lightly on the wing.
Go get ‘em tiger.

You may call me, raptor.

Like the dinosaur?

No, like the bird of prey.

And with that, Sage took off and flew after Damien, giving a joyous hoot of revenge.

Chapter 15

I bounded through the back door of the Chokecherry mansion and up the stairs. Whatever magic Bianca had implemented had faded slightly, but it was still there, and I got the feeling it would stay. Not because it was her magic, but because it belong to Lucinda.

The woman had filled the mansion with hatred and that was the kind of negative cloak that stuck.

I hurried down the hall and into the room at the end.

Penelope was still there, lying on the floor, and Amelia sat with Pen’s head in her lap, rocking back and forth, tears streaming down her face.

She looked up at me and gasped. Then the tension released from her shoulders. “Oh, Talisman, it’s just you.” She trembled and clung to Penelope.

Clearly, Amelia didn’t know what to do or where to get help. The lines around her wrists and arms spoke of being bound for more than just a couple hours. Bianca had probably tied her to the table the minute they’d gotten her back to the house.

“I don’t know what to do, she’s not waking up.” Amelia rocked her back and forth, then tapped her on the face. “Penelope, wake up!”

Penelope groaned and her eyelids flickered. “Who –?”

“Penelope, it’s me, you’re safe.”

Safe was a relative term, in this instance. But relief flooded me anyway. Penelope was alive. That stunning spell stunt she’d pulled hadn’t killed her.

I padded over to her and gave her a lick on the nose, then paused.

No, she wasn’t dead, but she was too weak to move. Penelope was on the precipice. Not really dead but not alive either. Darkness yawned before her and if she took one step too far, she’d fall over the edge and I’d never be able to reach her again.

“Can you hear me?” Amelia asked, stroking the hair back from Pen’s forehead. “You were so brave, Pen, you –”

“Penelope!” Dr. Luke burst into the room with Lola in tow.

That’s my girl!

He was already on the way here when I ran into him. I just herded him around the back.
Lola thought. She hurried over to me and rubbed against my side, purring softly. I nuzzled her silky fur. Just touching her made me feel more centered than I had all day.

Penelope was in danger of falling into the abyss and the only man who could stop it had just entered the room, lips pressed into a thin line when they should have been full and lush. Ripe for kissing. In order to get all of us the hell out of this sordid mess.

Dr. Luke pulled up short and stared at Penelope on the floor. He went white as a sheet, then rushed over and dropped to his knees. He took Penelope from Amelia, and stared into her face.

“What happened?” he asked, glancing at Amelia, and touching the backs of his fingers to Pen’s cheek.

I nudged him, but no amount of bumping and purring would make him understand that he had to pucker up to save her. They had always been on their own schedule when it came to romance, and that fact remained true, even now.

“It was, uh, it was Bianca Chokecherry,” Amelia said, then fell quiet. Clearly, she wasn’t willing to out Penelope as a witch, even to her one true love. Granted, Amelia had no idea that Dr. Luke was Penelope’s one true love.

Wait a second.

What?
Lola asked, sitting at my side. I could feel the fear from her. She didn’t want to lose a second owner, a second mistress. What would happen to the animals without Penelope around to protect them?

Pen groaned and turned her head.

Amelia saw the page in the book about breaking a spell with love’s true kiss. I just might be able to
– I hurried forward and nudged Amelia, she looked down at me and frowned.

I nudged her again.

She clicked her tongue this time.

I ran to Penelope, batted her on the head, then moved to Dr. Luke and batted him on the arm. Then I repeated the motion. Again, and again as the two of them watched in consternation.

“What’s he doing?” Dr. Luke asked. “Maybe the trauma has caused him to go mad. I wish I had a sedative with me.”

“I have no idea,” Amelia replied, scratching her forehead. “Tali, stop it. Penelope’s sick. This isn’t the time for games.”

Humans can be so thick sometimes.
I didn’t stop going through the motions, patting Pen, then Dr. Luke and glancing up at Amelia to see if she understood.
Help me out here, will you, babe?

Anything for you, Tali.
Lola hurried over and mimicked my actions, exactly in time. Pat, pat, look. Pat, pat, look.

“What the hell?” Dr. Luke’s eyes went round, but he didn’t move out of reach of our gentle pats. “Did Bianca slip them a mickey? They’ve lost it.”

Amelia gasped.

Oh, I think she got it.
I looked at her and felt nothing but triumph.

Amelia nodded at me, as if she understood my meaning, then looked directly at Dr. Luke. “Well, this is kind of awkward.”

I nudged Lola so she’d stop doing the ‘love’s true kiss’ dance.

You can dance for me later, doll. When we’re alone. I like the way your tail gyrates.

You’re on.

“What is?” Dr. Luke said, watching Lola and I retreat a short way to enjoy the show.

Penelope’s eyelids flickered open and she looked up at him with a soft smile. Dr. Luke returned it.

“Remember Sleeping Beauty? You have to kiss her, I think,” Amelia said. “It’s the only thing that will, uh. Okay, you have to kiss her and that’s it. Please, just try.”

“What?!” Dr. Luke gulped and licked his lips. “Not without her permission.”

“Kiss her,” Amelia insisted, glancing at Lola and me. “Kiss her now.”

“I’m not going to kiss her. I mean, I’ve thought about it and I really want to, but not now. Not like this. She’s sick, I don’t want to make it worse.” Dr. Luke’s words came out in stutters.

“If you don’t kiss her, she’ll die.”

“That’s crazy,” he replied.

Penelope’s wan hand lifted, achingly slow, and rested on Dr. Luke’s cheek. The only strength she had left had gone into that gesture and the small smile on her lips. “Kiss me, Luke.”

That was all the permission Dr. Lucas Collier needed.

PDA incoming.
I warned Lola.

Dr. Luke bent slowly and placed his lips on Penelope’s. He kissed her with true tenderness and emotion, gripping her to his chest and stroking one hand down her cheek and then up into her hair.

They parted and Penelope sucked in a shallow gasp. “Oh, Luke,” she said, and her eyes brightened, as if she’d never seen him before.

There was an audible crack, then a pop, and the room flooded with wind again. This time it was white and blue energy swirling in circles. It streamed through the window, the door, hell, even through the cracks in the floorboards.

Whatever Lucinda had taken, came rushing right back.

It entered Penelope’s body in filaments of light, gushing into her and invigorating her skin. Blush returned to her complexion, her eyes were glassy and bright, her hair even more lustrous than usual.

Dr. Luke stared, shaking his head and caught up in the wonder of the energy swirling around him.

Finally.
A weight lifted off my shoulders. The curse lifted off Penelope’s. My task was done. My mistress was happy and her true powers had returned. Never again would I have to help her solve a mysterious case of failed love spells. My remaining lives were safe. Now, I could get back to lapping coffee grounds and courting my girlfriend.

But what about Lucinda, Tali? Isn’t she still out there? She’s going to come looking for revenge along with her evil spawn.

Save those questions for another time, lover. Let’s focus on celebrating now.

Penelope rose from the floor, brushing off her blouse and jeans. Amelia stayed where she was, still weak from the entrapment in the mansion.

And Dr. Luke, well, he was glued to the spot, staring up at Pen, his expression a mixture of wonderment and adoration.

“Okay, what just happened?” he asked.

Penelope shared a glance with Amelia, then cracked up laughing. “That,” she said, “is a very long story.”

Dr. Luke stood and walked to the woman he loved. “And I’ve got all the time in the world.”