Gambit (18 page)

Again, he didn’t pretend ignorance. She couldn’t read him, but her mind had to be broadcasting her frustration on every level. “It will fade.” His soft voice echoed in the vast space. “Dull, as we continue to deny it.”

Chae stopped at the end of a great bed. Her fingers traced over the gnarled carving of the black wood posts supporting the red silk canopy. She closed her eyes and focused her thoughts on the feel of the intricate wood under her fingertips. The twist of pain tightened in her gut. Her mother had suffered worse. She’d lost the man she’d found.

Tears burned her eyes and Chae willed them back. “And that’ll be it.” She let out a slow breath, finding her throat tight. “Undo this damn thing.”

She bit her lip at the light touch of his fingers against her spine. The sharp pain in her bottom lip didn’t distract from the knowledge that Daned was undressing her, his movements slow and precise as he unfastened hooks and loosened intricate lacing. His knuckles drew a line between her shoulder blades, and the ached-for contact was a bolt of electricity under her skin. Heat pooled between her thighs. How the hell could she ignore this need? Her body screamed that it was right. That he was right. Meant for her.

Daned paused and in the heavy silence of the carved crystal room his breathing ran too fast. The bodice eased and she pulled in her first deep lungful of air for hours…and it pushed her aching breasts against the tough inner frame of the bodice. His hands didn’t leave her.

Chae gripped the bedpost, the carving of the wood biting against her palm. Cool air kissed her skin where he’d parted the tight laces of the corset. “Daned.” His name broke from her, a warning, a plea, she didn’t know. He’d just said they had to ignore their desire and let it dull. How the fuck was she supposed to do that with his teasing touch tracing down the length of her spine? “I don’t think—”

His lips ghosted over her neck and she gasped. She pressed her thighs together, but the delicious and forbidden ache only deepened and made her heart pound. She swallowed and willed herself to breathe. “Are you testing me?”

He didn’t answer, only parted the bodice and pushed the bronze fabric free of her shoulders. His lips touched the curve of her neck, the warm, smooth skin of his cheek and his cool hair brushing against her skin. Her nipples peaked and she couldn’t help the low groan that escaped her. Another kiss and another formed points of wicked fire along her shoulder, and Chae crushed her eyes against them. Damn him, he would make her come from something so simple, so innocent.

His large hot palms stroked under the fabric, pushing it from her body before he gripped the top of her arms. Daned pressed his fingers into her flesh, holding her, the feel of him so close her skin tingled. His mind was a blank wall. Chae told herself that didn’t matter, that his touch was all she craved. It was a lie.

“My hot, almost naked pilot.” His breath caressed her skin, his fingers flexing around her arms. “We could lose hours,
days
together. One more sharing of our bodies and you would’ve been mine.” Even with his mind closed to her, she felt the push of his regret. “I want to taste you. Fuck you.”

Curses ran hot and fast through her thoughts. It wasn’t fair for him to play with her like this. “And if we did? If we got naked and sweaty right now?” She wet her lips, her body far too willing to act. “What then?”

“Then we would have accepted permanence.”

“And that means?”

Daned sighed against her skin and his hands left her shoulders. He stepped back but the imprint of his body, his fingers, burned. “It would not be worth it.”

His words spiked though her chest, catching her desire and twisting it into a sharp pain. Anger rode her and her hands itched. Fuck it, from now on she was wearing a gun. She was going to use her imperial advisor as target practice. “Fine.” She bit out the word, not turning to look at him. She pushed the loosened material back onto her shoulders and fisted her hand in the full skirts before she cut out across the room. She wanted proper clothes.

Chae pressed her palm against the panel and the soft hum of first-grade tech filled the tense silence. She willed herself to focus on the screen, flipping through the choice of trousers, tunics and boots. She gritted her teeth. Did nothing come without silk and lace and tight corseting?

She stabbed at her selection and the hum deepened as the production unit wove her clothes. Seconds dragged and she resisted the need to turn, to glare at Daned, to demand what exactly wasn’t worth it. A soft flare of light and the lip of the machine filled with her choices. When he told her, she’d probably shoot him.

Chae shucked off her dress, the crystal-cooled air wrapping around her bare skin. A sound startled her and she turned to stare at Daned. He’d pulled in a sharp breath. She glanced down at her body, realizing that she stood before him in slippers and skimpy silk underwear. Shit. She’d forgotten. He’d made her forget…Her gaze moved automatically to the worst of her scars, the constant reminder of how she’d failed her mentor, Loxias. The one that cut down her back in a jagged line. Light caught on the long rough scar drawing her skin from the curve of her fourth right rib down to the curve of her arse. “Think the princes will appreciate this scar on their empress?”

His gaze almost raked her flesh. He was unreadable. Did he hold the usual disgust and pity? Was she making him rethink his lack of scarring? The strafing was one thing, but the silver puckered skin following the jagged cut had horrified her lovers. Their reaction had driven her into choosing flesh-pets. They’d never judged her destroyed skin.

“You got it in a knife attack in your hangar when you were sixteen. The attack that killed your mentor,” he murmured. “You blinded one attacker and broke the kneecaps of the other.”

Chae looked away. Shit. He really did know everything about her. She pressed her fingers against her eyelids. Jobal she’d saved with hardly any effort. But Loxias…She’d fought, kicked, punched…but that hadn’t been enough to stop him from dying. She hated that fact as much as she hated the unsightly scar on her back.

“I wasn’t looking at your scar.”

Chae tugged on the loose dark tunic and it fell midthigh. “Yes, you were.” She pulled on trousers and stamped into her boots. “I felt the disgust of the princes. I wonder if they’ve already read the file you have on me.”

“Majesty…”

Damn it, she’d forgotten how much her scars affected men. She’d wrapped herself in blissful ignorance, choosing only flesh that wanted to give her pleasure. Living gold had formed another mask, making her forget in the overriding rush of lust.

Chae stalked toward the thin windows, eager to move away from Daned, from the pain of her thoughts, to find a way to distract herself. The thin frames parted before her. Cold mountain air rushed her and she sucked in a quick, startled breath.

A balcony stretched the length of the windows, scores in the black marble giving her boots grip. The knot of anger and disappointment tightened in her belly. She gripped the white marble balustrade, her fingers tight against the cold stone. Afternoon sunlight washed down over the first city of Ara far below her. It nestled in a valley surrounded by the jagged black mountains. Copper roofs gleamed and her gaze followed the sinuous curves of unfamiliar architecture. She pulled in a deeper, chilled breath.

She’d escaped the industrial stink of Arkhengai, found more wealth—and status—than she could ever dream of…but something about it just wasn’t enough. And it should be. She was still just who she’d been only a few days before. A runner, sarcastic and scarred, and too used to flesh-pets and not to real flesh-and-blood men. With their reactions.

Chae ran her fingers though her loose, clean hair and teased the line of her tunic straight across her shoulders. Nothing seemed to clear her thoughts. She wanted Daned. More than wanted. She needed him. Just a short time ago, they were supposed to have a permanent arrangement, where he provided her with incredible sex. Now she had the unwanted attention of nine princes…and not the man she craved. Wonderful.

She strode back into the vast bedroom, the thick soles of her boots silent against the deep rugs. She couldn’t hide out on the balcony. The winds bit at her skin.

“Majesty.” Daned stood just inside the room.

Chae cursed, her hand leaping to the Sel-9 no longer strapped to her thigh. She glared at Daned. The high windows closed behind her, wood thunking into the frame, the sound dull and hollow. “Just because you can sneak up on me, Daned, doesn’t mean you should.”

He gave that irritating nod again, his face a mask of calm, his mind gleaming…and very closed. “The ceremony will begin in an hour.”

That fact stopped her feet and her stomach churned. “And I have to have sex with them all? The crystal sliver is just a Ladaian way of taking a number?”

The little vein started to jump in his temple again. “Yes, Majesty.”

Curses ripped through her thoughts. “Gold,” she muttered. She rubbed at her jaw and hated to admit that the only way she was going to get through the nightmare was by binding each man in gold. Her fingers curled into her palms at the thought of having to trace the living metal around their naked bodies and seal it in place with a kiss. But that hardship would remove the horror of having sex with them. The gold would burn lust under her skin just as much as it charged them and, though the memory wouldn’t be pleasant, the experience wouldn’t fill her with complete repugnance. “I want them wrapped in Igasho gold.”

Daned blinked. “Majesty…?”

“You found it before. I’m sure the Igasho can be persuaded to part with more.” She winced. “Though it would have to be thoroughly sterilized after each—”

“No.”

Chae gritted her teeth. Fuck it, who was the empress here? She strode toward him. “You and the bloody chair keep reminding me of tradition and my lack of choice.” She stopped only centimeters from him. Light cut across him and thickened shadow over his face. “I have to fuck them, but the memories are
not
going to eat at me. I need the gold.”

“The princes will not agree to being bound.”

Chae let out a harsh laugh. “I think you’re underestimating how eager they are at the prospect of fathering my successor.” She lifted her eyebrow. “And I’m sure they’ll be as grateful as me. I felt their…distaste.”

For a moment, he wasn’t focused on her and she felt the push of his thoughts. “Our agent with the Igasho has been informed of your need, Majesty.”

She wiped a hand over her mouth, hating his compliance even though she’d demanded it. Her life was screwed. She moved past him and stopped at the foot of her vast bed. Her fingers stroked the crimson silk, rough skin catching on its smoothness. No, she would not do it here. She needed neutral ground. A room she would have sealed after. Yes, there was
that
room. An antechamber off the throne room, but the sunder-seld stopped her memories at the blank wall. Damn it, the chair had her memory peppered with holes. “Will it be one after the other, or—”

“Majesty, the sunder-seld holds that knowledge.”

The sudden pressure in his voice brought a wry smile to her lips. “The throne has no secrets from its imperial advisor.” Hell, she sounded like the chair now and unbidden, uncomfortable memories rose of one of the early empresses fucking princes in front of her whole court. Chae’s stomach twisted. Damn it, she needed a warning for shit like that. No, she was having that small room, sound shielded and absolutely no witnesses. “The empress Arial—”

“I am not standing witness.”

Disgust broke from him, swamping Chae, and his anger burned over her. It flared her own emotions, whipping them and shooting heat under her skin. She tried to clamp her will on the sudden surge but telepathy, empathy, was still too new and she couldn’t construct barriers. Why the hell had she been envious of the skill? She turned to face him, fighting the need to lash words. Her fingers curled into tight fists. “We’ve both accepted this, Daned.”

His mind was a metal shutter again. Yes, he had the experience to protect his thoughts, and after a few seconds even the thin tightness of his mouth eased. His pliant mask was back. “Yes, it’s tradition, Majesty.”

His statement rushed her emotions. She stared at Daned. Damn him. His mild tone suggested she’d simply talked about the weather and hell, he sounded like bought flesh. Heat beat hard in her face as her anger rose. “What’s going on here? Really?”

He tapped his fingers against the plate of the production unit and a gleaming sheet of metal appeared on the black lip. He held up an agenda, images shining on the slender device. “I have confirmation of your audiences with the Houses—”

“No.” Chae cut the word through his…acceptance. Enough. She wanted him to say no, for him to admit to as much horror as she had for what was about to happen. Hell, he was the only man who could say no to her. If he broke his stupid need for duty, she’d follow him and fuck the consequences. Didn’t he know? Didn’t he realize she loved him? The fire of that secret and surprising admission burned up from her gut and drove power through her flesh. She closed the distance between them.

The heavy shutter still protected his mind. Daned met her gaze, his calm and unruffled, and that only spurred the fury tearing up hot and wild from her gut. Time to break him. “Is it that I got to sit on sunder-seld? Did I thwart some dark ambition of yours?” She poked her finger into his chest. “Is that what’s eating you?”

“I never wanted to be emperor.”

She laughed. “Yeah, right. You’re pissed off that a fifth caste sat on your precious throne.”

Daned let out a soft sigh. “The sunder-seld chose you. I have no problem with that.”

The patronizing little sigh had the fury pounding at her thoughts so hard that she almost missed it. There, the betraying little flicker of his eyes. Shit, was it envy after all? Was his attraction simply lust? Had he wanted the throne? She lifted her chin and clamped her will onto the twist of too many conflicting and painful emotions. She had to know the final truth before she went and got naked with a bunch of degenerate strangers. Was it her title or her that had his anger breaking free?