Gena/Finn (8 page)

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Authors: Kat Helgeson

BOOK: Gena/Finn
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I just told my mom I was
taking a chem class...?

Feb 18, 1:19 AM

lol what imdrunk

Feb 18, 3:25 AM

ha nevermind

why ru awake?

okay so i'm sorry but i don't get it. are we seriously just expected to forgive jake now just because he cried his way into making tyler say it? jake STABBED HIM IN THE BACK, you cant actually be one of the crazy people saying thats okay. write a fix-it fic? please? for me?

--mallory

ugh, seriously? He didn't stab him in the back. I'm like blue in the fingers from defending him on this one, I can't believe it's still necessary. In his heart he was on Tyler's side the whole time, but he HAD to trust Evanson's people over Ty's or both him AND tyler would have been totally fucked, and if tyler had known he was doing it to defend him he would have stopped him and tried to protect him. jake had to act like he'd actually decided to go against him. they needed an in and jake was the one willing to be the bad guy for a while for the sake of saving their asses. thank GOD tyler isn't still pissed at him, and I can't believe fandom still is, tbh. No fix-it.

--eve

is it so much to ask that you step out of your jakegirl comfort zone just ONCE? we're hurting over this one. there's way more of us than you, your audience could be way bigger.

cry me a fucking river.

TALK TO ME ABOUT THAT EPISODE because i am dying of feelings and also of fucking TYLERGIRL NEGATIVITY. remind me that i don't hate fandom, please.

how's things? you're not mad at me for implying charlie's boring, are you? i seriously didn't mean to. i read over my message later and hated myself.

--eve

I totally hate fandom sometimes.

Do you follow popstotheweasel at all? She's this tylergirl whose journal I read, mostly because she reads mine. Well, the episode wasn't even over and she already had a post up about how ABUSIVE Jake is to Tyler and how inconsiderate of his feelings and how he's just holding Tyler back in everything they do.

I mean, this episode was yesterday. I haven't even organized my thoughts yet. I don't know how people summon up that much hatred that fast for a thing they supposedly love.

Please don't beat yourself up about the Charlie thing. He is boring :)

boring can be nice! (so no secret internet life, then?)

i want to say some kind of “can't we all just get along” thing but the truth is i say shit about tyler that's as bad as what they're saying about jake sometimes but like...it's JAKE, you know? he's this fucking brave kid who's always had tyler there to clean up his messes but NEVER let himself get complacent, and he's got all this courage to strike out on his own and DEFEND tyler and just be the big damn hero tyler always wanted him to never have to be and just...seriously, Show, what? this is almost as bad as the girls who just watch hoping they'll take their shirts off. don't get me started.

Secret internet life, such as it is, apparently consists of playing Warcraft and not exchanging names with a bunch of gamers. He says the only thing they talk about is stuff like PvP stats and goblin keep sieges.

I guess it makes sense. That stuff doesn't integrate with his regular life the way fandom does, I think. I mean, a lot of the guys he plays with are people he knows in real life, but they also hang out and do other stuff and there are whole days where the game doesn't even come up. Whereas I've kind of always got Jake in the back of my mind.

Is that pathetic? It's just that Jake gives me all these FEELINGS, you know? Like, the other day I was at work and incredibly bored and I started thinking about that time in season one when Jake got caught in that rope in the water and Tyler had to jump in after him even though he can't swim, and Jake was so vulnerable and sweet wrapped up in Tyler's stupid flannel jacket...were tylergirls not watching that episode?

they probably blame jake for getting tyler all cold and wet, poor baby. (although i kind of like when my favorite characters are miserable? i promise i don't want ACTUAL PEOPLE to be miserable. but then tyler takes care of him and it's so nice...)

goddddd that episode, i don't know if i love you or hate you for reminding me.

i can't really imagine my life without fandom at this point, and maybe i should mention that to my shrink or something but like...it doesn't feel like a problem. it's a thing that i do. my whole life is little things that i do. sorry, aforementioned shrink made me all melancholy and introspective. it's okay.

tell me about you, how's life?

I love when Tyler gets all caretakery. It's something about the purity of that bond, you know? The way he'd do anything for Jake, literally. As complicated as their lives are, that's this really simple thing they can fall back on.

I don't know why you'd need to mention that to your shrink, but...
I've never been to one, so I don't know whereof I speak, here. This isn't me saying I'm too sane for therapy or anything (ha!), it's just not something I've ever done. What's it like? Do you hate it? I feel like I would hate it.

Wow, shut up, Finn. You really don't have to answer ANY of that, I'm sorry.

Life's the same. Charlie's at work until 4 am and I'm staying up to wait for him because otherwise we never see each other. But I really can't complain, because he's paying 70% of the rent on this place. Even though the fact that our rent is as high as it is, is completely his fault, because he ABSOLUTELY HAD to have a two-bedroom in case we get guests or a dog we decide we don't want to see or something.

no no it's cool. what i do isn't exactly therapy--i did that for a while, but that's more of a weekly thing where you go and talk about your feelings and shit. not knocking that, but right now i don't really have feelings worth discussing. what i do is, i go in once a month, she asks me to rate my mood one to ten and am i seeing things or whatever, i say no, we smile at each other, she writes the prescription. it's ten minutes tops.

so finn is such a badass nickname. do you use it in real life? eve's not my real name. technically it could be a nickname of my full name, i guess, but it's not one i use. i didn't even do that on purpose, _evenif just kind of morphed into that when people were talking to me.

I do, yeah. There were three Stephanies in my fifth grade class and I was sick of being Steph B. My mom haaaates it. She says it's a boy's name and she won't use it, but I've had it so long that anything else just doesn't sound like me.

So...what's your name, then? Obviously, you don't have to tell me if you don't want.

(Can we just establish a you-don't-have-to-tell-me policy so I don't have to say it every time?)

i don't know if i'm private really, i'm just not used to having to tell people things, or like small talk or whatever. my class has 41 kids in it and most of us have been here since the beginning of middle school. we're so bad at talking to anyone who doesn't already know everything about us, it's ridiculous. you should hear us trying to make phone calls.

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