Gifted Curse (Curse Trilogy) (16 page)

He sighs out, and takes another bite before turning back to me with pain tinting his perfectly light eyes.

“Was I really that bad?” he asks pitifully.

I really feel like a piece of shit again now.

“No.  You were actually amazing… when you were there.  Until the last two years of our relationship, you were the best thing I could have imagined.  Then you started disappearing more and more, and you never told me the truth about where you were going.  I spent six months thinking you were cheating on me.  I spent the other eighteen months thinking you were done with me, but you didn’t know how to tell me.  It sucked,” I murmur wearily as all those painful memories flood back.

He exhales loudly, and then he pulls my barstool closer so that my knees are between his legs.

“Araya, I never cheated on you.  I never wanted to spend a minute away from you.  I sure as hell didn’t want out.  I loved you more than I ever showed you, and that’s where I fucked up the worst.  I wish I could go back and fix it, but I can’t.  I’d love a fresh start though.”

The sincerity in his tone leaves me with chill bumps.

“It wasn’t the blood,” I mumble, and then I turn away with tears in my eyes.

“What wasn’t?” he asks with bemusement.

“Earlier, when we were… you know… it wasn’t the blood the last time.  I wasn’t under the effects,” I whimper out.

He sighs out loudly, and then takes a sip of his drink before saying, “I know.”

“Then why did you say I was?  I thought you were playing it honest.”

“I wasn’t lying to you to hide anything or be deceitful.  I could tell you felt guilty, and I didn’t want you hating me.”

His eyes stare down at the plate he appears to be done with, and I stand up to wrap my arms around him.  He pulls me tightly to his body, and I kiss his cheek before pulling back.

“Thank you, but this still can’t work.  Please do one more thing for me, and I swear I’ll stop asking for stuff,” I murmur as I stare into the glistening eyes anxiously awaiting the words about to come out of my mouth.

“You haven’t asked me for anything yet, and I’ll do anything you want me to,” he says, and his grip tightens around my waist.

“You have to stop chasing after me.  I want to be friends with you because I think you really have changed somewhat, but I can’t go through what I already did… ever again.  That possibility will always haunt me, and I would rather us try this arrangement in order to keep me from having to leave.  I don’t have a home, friends, or anything else to go back to right now, so I sort of have to stay here.  If you can’t just be my friend, I’ll have to leave.”

He tightens his lips, and then his arms release me when he hears the bomb I just dropped.

“Okay.  I told you I would do anything, and if this is what you want, then okay.”

I can hear the pain tickling the back of his throat, and he stands to toss the rest of his food into the trash before gently placing the plate in the sink.

“Thank you,” I murmur, and now that he’s acting a little icier, I almost regret saying anything.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

He forces a smile, and then he heads to the bedroom.  Within a breath, he walks back out with a pillow and blanket to make a bed on the couch.

“So I
am
sleeping on the couch now,” I tease.

“No,” he snickers out, “I am.  You take the bed, and leave the door open so I can hear you if you need me.”

Oh.

“I’d rather it if you just stayed in there with me.  I’d feel bad if you had to sleep on your own couch,” I grumble.

I’m officially a loon.  One second I tell him to stay in the friend territory only, and the next I’m asking him to sleep with me.

“I’ll be fine.  Just let me know if you need anything,” he murmurs, his eyes averting me as they have since my cold request..

“Okay,” I mumble, and then I place my empty plate in the sink before walking to the bedroom.

He doesn’t look up, speak, or even acknowledge I’m walking by.  I lean against the doorframe, and then I try not to sound like a spoiled, indecisive teen.

“Should I go?”

He finally looks up, his eyes still not catching mine, and shakes his head.

“Definitely not.  It’s too easy to relapse this early on, and you were gone before you knew you were going the last time.  Each time it gets worse.”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with this after what I just said.  I can go stay with Clay,” I murmur while fighting back tears, and I swish over to the barely fixed door to leave.

“Araya,” he growls, and he jerks me around to face him.  “Damn it, you’re staying here.  Go get in my bed and get some sleep.  You’re not hurting a damn thing, and I’m not letting you leave just because you don’t want to be with me.”

I don’t fight him when he ushers me back to the bedroom.  I just flop onto the bed, sinking into my own web of fucked-up-ness.  I watch as he climbs onto the couch in the living area, and I sigh as turn over on my side. 
What a fucking day.

Chapter 5

A Full Circle
 

I wake up to the light blaring through the enormous window of the room, feeling an arm wrapped around me in a comforting embrace.  I turn to face Hale, and I’m a little confused.  My leg wraps around his waist, my hand strides through his hair, and my lips almost touch his.  I quickly withdraw when he stirs, keeping my touch a secret.

His eyes flutter open, and he stares into mine for a brief second before withdrawing from his embracing position.

“Sorry,” he murmurs while sitting up and avoiding further eye contact with me.

“It’s fine.  Did something happen?” I worry, and I climb to my knees to gauge his odd reaction.

“You started screaming for me in your sleep.  The only time you would stop is when I was holding you,” he mutters, and then he stands to his feet.

Oh fuck.  I thought that was just a dream.

“I’m so sorry,” I grumble, and my head flops down in my hands.

“You’ve had a traumatic loss.  There’s nothing to be sorry for.  You hungry?” he asks while walking out.

“Not really.  This meeting has me a little too nervous to eat.”

“I feel the same way,” he exhales, and then he returns with a glass of orange juice for me instead.  “I called Wendy to see if there were any other rooms available, but we’re a little overbooked due to all the damages we received to the east half.  Her room is too small for you to stay with her unless you don’t mind sleeping on the floor or sharing a twin size bed with her.  She only has a chair there, and I doubt that would be comfortable.  Clay has… a guest staying with him,” he chuckles out, and then he turns more serious.  “Just stay here until we can make other arrangements, and I’ll keep sleeping on the couch.  It’s very comfortable believe it or not, though I didn’t actually sleep on it long.”

I slide over closer to him, and he stands up just before my bare leg grazes his hand.

“I’m going to send Wendy to collect your clothes.  Is there anything else you want her to get while she’s there?” he asks very stiffly.

“My makeup, toothbrush, and other essentials.  She’ll know what a girl needs,” I sigh out.

“You’re not going to argue with me about staying here?” he asks skeptically.

“I trust you’re being honest with your reasoning, and I don’t really see a better option,” I say with a shrug, and I’m praying I’m not transparent.

He’s doing exactly what I asked him to, and now I’m fucking pissed that he doesn’t seem the least bit interested.  His body looks too damn good not to touch, and his lips are too soft not to feel on some part of my body.

I just broke up with Brazen.  I have to stop this.

He almost smiles, but he catches himself.  He starts to turn to leave, and I stare down at the black opal on my hand.  I fight off the tears as I remove it for the first time.

“Hale?” I whimper, and he quickly rejoins me.  “Will you have Wendy leave this behind?” I murmur softly.

“I will,” he says gently, and my arms wrap around him in the embrace I need right now.

He returns the embrace with one of compassion, though its mingled with rigid posture.  I feel as though I’ve destroyed his feelings for me with one sharp, cutting delivery.

“I need to go catch up with her before the meeting,” he shakily replies, and I realize my shirt has lifted slightly too far when I wrapped my arms around him, leaving my bare lower half exposed while pressed against him.

I just nod as he walks out, and then I sigh as I stare at the picture of me above the bed.  So long ago I could just love him without any reservations.  Now, I’ve got him and Brazen fucking with my mind.

I pull on my high-waist
, black pencil
skirt
,
and I leave the top two buttons of my crisp white shirt undone.  I smirk as I fluff my hair, and then I very leisurely strut through the rest of Hale’s home to find him.

I’m curious where he is when I don’t see him, and I look out the window overlooking the back side of the compound to see him talking with several construction workers beside the hybrid school.  Tears start to whelp up, and I start fanning to dry them up before they drench my eyes.

He straightens his tie before walking back toward the massive building we’re in, and then I take a deep breath.  He’s fast, so he’ll be here any second.  I check the mirror to make sure my makeup hasn’t smudged, and then the door creaks open to reveal the man I can’t get out of my head.

“You ready?” he asks before his eyes find mine.

“No, but I don’t think it matters,” I sigh out, and he swallows hard while adjusting his tie.

“Are you sure you want to look like that with Brazen in the room?” he asks, and I smirk a little deviously.

“It’s a business meeting, and this is business attire.  I’m not sure what else I should be wearing,” I say with coy demeanor, and I turn to hide the smile I can’t stifle.

“You bringing your coffee?” he asks while holding the door, and I just nod as we make our way out.

Knots, nerves, and anxiety wad up in the pit of my stomach to emphasize the magnitude of the situation we’re in.  I hate anyone outside of our species knowing about our secrets.  They already think we’re beneath them, and they think we’re savage enough as it is. 
Our kind
has enough shit to deal with without adding this on top of the pile, and it’s all my fault.

“It’s going to be okay.  The worst that could happen is they withdraw their alliance and leave the compound.  We’re stronger than they are,” he whispers, and his hand takes my free one as we walk into the room.

I almost fall forward when I see Brazen sitting across the table with his hands steepled in front of his face.  His eyes burn against me, and he finally looks away as Clay draws everyone’s attention to him.

Hale pulls out my chair, and I can see Brazen’s jaw clenching.  It wasn’t too long ago this was all in reverse, and now I feel all the more nauseated.

“We’ll just cut right to the chase.  I know you’re all confused about what happened last night, and I hope you can understand our gifts and our heritage come with consequences.  We’ve been ostracized, shunned, and hated by the humans and full bloods since we came into existence.  We’ve never had parents waiting at home to console us, and there has never been an easy day in our lives.  It has forced an evolution upon our species that we actually refer to as a devolution.  When we’re emotionally drained our species finds solace within our own kind to keep from experiencing the trauma life continues to deal us.

“The first phase is usually harmless-”
unless you’re as strong as I am
“-and it’s fairly easy to control if you catch it early on.  As you saw, Hale was able to coax Araya to follow him, and he convinced her to take more of the olophine to completely subdue the trance.  She returned promptly, and now she sits here completely alert, aware, and lucid,” Clay says, and I can tell he’s hoping his limited tidbit is enough to appease the full blood audience.

“Why Hale?” Brazen asks very coldly, and my eyes stare into his while his hands keep their steepled stance.

“Gifted hybrids have counterparts - the one they’re meant to be with.  Hale is hers.  She feels safe with him, and security is a big deal within that phase,” Clay asserts very gently to lighten the blow.

“You keep saying
this
phase.  Does that mean there are others?” a man asks, and I see Clay’s eyes trying to drop in dismay.

As commander, he has to tell the truth or it could cost him his life.

“Yes.  There are others, but it’s rather hard to explain them without you seeing for yourself,” Clay says in diversion.

“That doesn’t really sound so bad,” a full blood muses.

Brazen’s eyes lock with mine once more.  I tune out the rest of the conversations animating the room, and Hale leans over to take my hand in his.

“You ready?” he asks, and I’m almost startled out of my trance.

“Yeah.  Very.  Let’s get out of here,” I shiver out.

He pulls me to the door, and I hear the full bloods talking amongst themselves.

“We need to have a private meeting right now about issues regarding last night’s events.  Would you please stay, Commander?  I believe your input on the situation would be useful,” a man murmurs, and now I’m worried Brazen is in trouble for attacking Hale.

Hale continues pulling me away from the room, and I whisper to him.

“Is Brazen in trouble?”

“No.  The full bloods just want to make sure that this isn’t going to cause a problem.  I already assured them I wouldn’t hold it against him.  They don’t need us to leave and join the unaligned considering our strength, so they’re smoothing things over.”

I breathe out a sigh of relief, and he opens the door to his home for me.  I want to just curl up in his lap when he sits down on the couch, but I refrain and head to the bedroom instead.

“Where are you going?” he asks curiously.

“To change back into something else.  I just want to sleep the day away now that this is over, and I don’t want to wear a skirt while doing so,” I grumble.

“Do you need me to get you anything?”

You.

“No.  I’m fine,” I mumble, and I almost want to slap myself right now for feeling so vulnerable.

I sigh as I pull on a pair of very short shorts, and then I pull on a tiny little top that just gives a barely-there peek at my belly while the neckline offers a grand view of my cleavage.  Hale’s eyes widen when I walk back through, but he quickly cuts them away.

I plop down on the couch beside him, and I lean against him as he watches an old movie from the days before the virus spread.

“Go to sleep,” he murmurs, and the curtains draw once he presses a button beside the couch.

“I want to watch this with you,” I yawn out, and he gives me a faint smirk before my eyes become too heavy to hold open any longer.

“Araya, are you coming?” Hale
asks in a slightly agitated tone.

“I am,” I huff, and I look in the mirror at the far too tight dress that almost drapes the floor.  The plummeting neckline barely hides any of my secrets, and it continues on to my navel for a larger peepshow than I intended to give.  “Remind me to never trust Wendy with picking me out a dress again,” I growl.

The blood red hue of the dress makes my hair look even darker as it swishes around my shoulders.  The hidden details are what make the dress beautiful, but also a little too… sexy.

“I’m sure it’s fine.  We really have to go,” he grumbles.

He’s been ill for two weeks.  I’m sure he’s ready to get me out of his apartment, and I know I’m going crazy too.  We’ve been locked up together like two horny caged animals, but there’s never any sex because of me and my big mouth.

The more I get to know him now, the more I wish I had just let him keep chasing me.

“I wish you weren’t so cranky.  As soon as there is a room available, I promise I’ll be gone,” I harp through the door.

“I don’t want you gone, I just don’t want to be late.  I’m the captain.  It would look bad,” he sighs.

“Go on without me.  I’ll just come down when I summon up the courage to let everyone see me in this.”

I twitch nervously as I spin around again, and the damn back is completely transparent through the lace of the dress.  Thankfully, the transparency doesn’t extend past my rear, but it’s still pretty damn slinky.

“I don’t want to leave you behind.”

“Then the captain will be late.”  I stare a moment longer at the dress I should toss in the trash rather than wear, and another dreadful sigh escapes.  “Just go.  I’ll be fine,” I grumble.

“Very well.  Come find me when you get there, and I’ll make sure Brazen doesn’t mess with you.  I know that’s why you’re not ready.  You’ll have to face him sooner or later.  You can’t hide in my home forever.”

“I can hide here until I have a home of my own again.  I’m looking into the Hershian compound.  They need a good interrogator, and I sent over my résumé yesterday.”

He doesn’t say a word, and I feel like a fool because he’s probably already gone.

I just roll my eyes, and then I let out a slight squeal when I hear, “You’re leaving?”

I turn to face the pitiful eyes staring into mine, and I shrug as if they don’t affect me - even though the do.

“I thought it might be good for me to get a fresh start… again.  I can’t go back to Javeline, I hate Hartwood, and
Selma has far too many people I know.”

“Seminole could use a good interrogator too,” he murmurs sadly.

“Seminole has you, and you’re just as good as I am.”

“You said you wouldn’t leave if I quit chasing you, and I have.  I actually prefer our new arrangement of friendship,” he says softly, and he moves to sit on the edge of the bed.

His words almost sting me even though it’s exactly what I asked him to do.  I never expected him to quit me so easily.

“It’s just a thought.  Besides, we can be friends from anywhere,” I almost huff out, and then I walk into the bathroom and shut the door behind me.  “Go on down.  I’ll be there in a minute.  They’ll be expecting you to start the cadet selection ceremony, and I’m sure the newbies are getting stir crazy,” I say with lightheartedness.