Going All In (20 page)

He wrapped his free arm over her and squeezed, pulling her into the tight embrace of his arms, trying to ward off her chill the way she had his. “I guess that’s why they say ‘love is blind.’”

Lost to their thoughts, they fell into a surprisingly comfortable silence. After a moment, she said, “Have you dated much since then?”

His quiet comfort turned choppy with tension and his stomach churned. She was so damned inquisitive he’d expected her line of questioning to end up here, but he still stiffened in response. “I haven’t
dated
anyone since Miranda.”

Her fingers stilled, and after a moment, when he didn’t volunteer more information, she quietly said, “I pretty much already know, so you might as well go ahead and tell me.”

His breath seized in his chest and he blinked hard a couple of times, trying to clear the thick, black cloud descending over their serenity. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve overheard conversations between Marianne and Sam. They don’t spend all day talking about you, but I’ve picked up on things here and there. They care about you and are worried.”

What the fuck?
Should he be pissed that his sex life was a hot topic of conversation, or feel all warm and fuzzy because Sam and Marianne cared enough to worry?

And if Callie already knew…

Is that why she’s with me?

She’d admitted to wanting to expand her boundaries and experience new things… Fuck, was she Miranda all over again?

Anger, hurt, and fresh humiliation burst to the surface with a thundering punch. He pushed her arm off him and scooted away like he was trying to escape a dangerous animal. “Is that why you’re with me, Callie? You looking to do a little slumming with a bad boy who can show you a good time on the wrong side of the tracks before you settle down with a nice, respectable man?”

*

“What?” Callie gasped with shock at Wade’s accusation, and she shot to a sitting position, not even caring as the sheet tumbled to her waist, leaving her exposed. “God, no. How can you think that?”

He lifted an eyebrow and continued to glare. “Are you not looking for someone to”—he dropped his gaze to her bare breasts—“expand your boundaries? Sounds like you’d heard enough from Sam and Marianne to know I could get the job done.”

Anger gathered in the pit of her stomach and crawled up her throat. “That isn’t fair. If anything, I found your…” the word
sordid
was on the tip of her tongue, but she refused to sink to his level and hurl insults just to be hurtful, “…recent affairs intimidating. So much so I feared you’d reject me because I’m not up to your usual standards.” In an attempt to cover her exposure—and not just physically—she gathered the sheet in her fist and tucked it under her chin.

Confusion and doubt swirled with the anger clouding his hard brown eyes. His forehead creased and she could tell he wanted to believe her, but his past hurts wouldn’t let him accept her explanation.

Appealing to his rational side, where logic ruled over emotion, she said, “I couldn’t have seduced you in my living room or joined you in the shower if I was just out for a good time.”

She fell back on the bed with a heavy
thwump.
“I don’t even know how to go out with a guy just for a good time. That’s why Jen’s always calling me a prude.”

His eyes narrowed with fresh anger, something she took as a positive sign. At least he cared enough to be offended on her behalf.

“I didn’t set out to be this way. It just happened. Yes, I want to explore new things, but not just sexually and not because I see you as… a plaything.” Her face curled with disgust and regret at saying the word.

She would never think of him that way, and knowing someone else had, caused a heavy ache to settle in her chest, making it difficult to breathe. “You make me want to be brave and adventurous. You bring out a side of me I didn’t know existed.” She smiled and dropped her gaze. “But I’ve enjoyed meeting her.”

He closed his eyes and his jaw popped the way it did when he clenched his teeth with annoyance. After several tense moments, he scrubbed his hand over his face, as if washing away the remnants of the past few minutes—and maybe even the past year—then drew in a deep breath. He nodded once, which she hoped meant he believed her, then said, “Why would your supposed
friend
say something like that to you? And why do you remain friends with someone who treats you the way she does?”

Both questions were easy to explain, but the second was less uncomfortable, so she started there. “Jen comes across a bit harsh sometimes”—she paused and smiled at his raised eyebrows—“and entitled and selfish, but deep down she’s a good person. She’s been a good friend to me, especially over the past two years.”

Shame over the upcoming confession caused Callie’s head and shoulders to slump. “I’m glad you don’t still see the resemblance between your ex and me, because that means I’m making progress.” She turned her head away from him and studied the light streaming in through the partially open bathroom door. “I never cheated on a boyfriend. I never really had one to cheat on. But selfish and spoiled?” She sighed. “Yeah, that was me.”

“There’s no way you were like Miranda. And I find it hard to believe you were as bad as you think.” His voice was soft but emphatic. “The person who offered me Dramamine and Gatorade when she needed it herself didn’t appear out of nowhere. Your life might’ve been different than it is now, but when I look at you, I see an all-American girl, busting her ass to make her way in the world, doing the best she can, like the rest of us. Working hard to get the things she wants”—he winked—“like a sexy pair of boots that come up to here.” Wicked intent filled his eyes as his gaze and finger slid across her leg, a little higher than the boots would go and dangerously close to where his mouth had been.

Guilt blew through her like a winter blizzard, freezing out the heat of his touch. She needed to tell him the truth, that she chose to work rather than live off her trust fund, but she couldn’t force out the words. He saw her the way she wanted to be, as the person she’d fought hard to become, and she didn’t want to lose that right now.

There would be time in the future, after they’d established a deeper connection and stronger bond, to tell him. Hopefully by then, he’d understand why she hadn’t been completely honest and upfront with him about her financial situation. And he would continue to look at her with eyes filled with lust and affection, not cold, dark, and hardened like they’d been while questioning her motives for being with him.

Anxious for a quick redirect, she switched to the other, more humiliating question. “As far as me being a prude…” She shrugged helplessly. “I fell in love with my dad’s protégé at fourteen. He was Prince Charming, and until two years ago, I was still waiting for him to ride in on a white horse and sweep me off my feet.” Heat crawled up her neck and cheeks as she confessed her silly fantasy. “I’ve had a few boyfriends, but…” She sighed and played with the top edge of the sheet. “The sex was never all that, so I didn’t spend much time or energy thinking about it. Or in relentless pursuit, like Jen.”

Until you came along.

He rolled to the side and and took her down to the mattress. Hovering over her, he said, “Has anyone ever made love to you?”

With him lying on top of her, heat pouring off him and deep affection emanating from his eyes, images of Wade making love to her rushed her mind. Her heart raced and she gulped at the erotic images coming to mind. “I’ve had sex.”

“I didn’t ask if you’ve had sex. I asked if anyone has ever made love to you. Did they hold you close and drive into you so deeply you weren’t sure where you ended and they began?”

Her breath and heart collided in her throat as she stared into his eyes and imagined the picture he painted. She had no words, but that was okay because the man who didn’t normally say a lot wasn’t finished.

“Have you ever stared into their eyes while they danced inside you, certain you could see straight into their soul… because they bared it to you while giving you everything they had?”

She’d never experienced anything close to what he described, and as she stared into the bottomless depths of his suede eyes, she realized she was closer to him in this moment than she’d ever been with any of her previous lovers. Her breathing was choppy and her heart sat in her throat, making it impossible to speak, so she shook her head in jerky movements, confirming what he already knew to be true.

“You’re not a prude, baby. You’re a tempting seductress who oozes sex appeal. You’ve never gotten close enough to anyone to really let go, and no one ever had a chance because your heart wasn’t available.” He wrapped his hand around the back of her head and rested his thumb on the pounding pulse in her neck. He swallowed hard and locked his gaze onto hers. In a soft voice filled with trepidation, he asked, “Is it available now?”

All signs of the Beast were gone as he stared into her eyes and held his breath, waiting for her answer. Staring into the eyes and soul of this deeply compassionate, tender man, she realized he could easily steal her heart if she wasn’t careful.

But she didn’t want to be careful anymore. She wanted Wade.

With tears pushing at her eyelids and her breath coming in ragged puffs, she nodded like a bobble-head and hoped he understood.

“Then let’s take things slowly and see what happens. I’m concerned about being the man you ultimately need, but I’m willing to give it a go if you are. And when the time is right…”

The sentence faded away as he lowered his lips to hers, slipped his tongue into her mouth, and gave her a scorching preview of things to come.

D
etermined to act like a mature adult involved in a real adult relationship, Callie didn’t lose her head over not seeing Wade for a full thirty-six hours, even though she desperately wanted to spend every waking moment wrapped up in his arms, exploring her newfound sexuality.

But real-life relationships included work and friends, so rather than spending all of his time cuddled with her, Wade spent Thursday in Anticue, preparing for the renovations on Gavin and Sunny’s bed and breakfast, and she worked at The Chesapeake, measuring rooms and windows and ordering furniture and drapes. After work, he went to the campground, and she took advantage of a rare evening alone to finish the dressing table.

Even though they hadn’t seen each other, they talked and texted several times, and every communication left her warm and bubbly with an infatuated schoolgirl smile plastered on her face. The conversations were more intimate than before their shower and discussion; the texts grew increasingly flirty and naughty.

The only surprise of the day came when Kevin dropped by The Chesapeake to tell her she’d be spending the next few weeks working in Anticue with Wade. The thought of working so closely with him excited her, especially given the hour-long drive to and from Anticue each day, but she was also a nervous wreck, wondering how Sunny would feel about working so closely with Callie.

Even though Callie had nothing to do with her father’s resort development business and had done everything in her power to stop him from strong-arming Sunny into selling her property, Callie still couldn’t look her in the eye without drowning in guilt and shame.

Her father’s determination to move forward with his plans to develop a resort on Anticue had driven him to use
whatever means
necessary to gain control of Sunny’s bar. Callie had tried to stop him but fell short in her efforts.

She’d called Gavin the second she suspected foul play. She’d snooped in her father’s office to gather information, and she’d teamed up with Gavin in an underhanded transaction that gave him control of the fishing pier. The move stripped her father of the largest and most crucial piece of property necessary to follow through with the development.

But that transaction also pushed her father over the edge with a nothing-to-lose attitude that almost cost Gavin and Sunny their lives.

A shudder ripped through her with the memory of the horrifying events of that night, catching Wade’s attention. “Why didn’t you tell me you were cold?” Even though the heat was already so high sweat had formed on his forehead, he cranked the fan up another notch, sending a burst of heat through the cab of the truck. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, then did a double take. “Are you okay? You’re awfully pale.”