Good Girl (Playroom) (42 page)

“I’m s
cared, Robbie,” I shamefully admit and stare at my clasped hands.

“Scared of
what? You can tell me anything,” he softly coaxes. “I’ll understand.”

“It’s been so long
… and I’m not the same person I was when I went to the
Playroom
. I can’t just fuck a random person. It will always mean something to me. I’ve had a total of one and a half partners. Devon was without a doubt my lover, but Auggie doesn’t really count. I don’t know,” I whimper.

“I’m the same way, Willow. You’re just at a disadvantage. We created the
Playroom
, so we know everyone- they’re our friends,” Robbie stresses. “Are you worried about watching Auggie or Kieren?”

“No, I don’t think so…
but I won’t know until I’m watching. Kieren tells me about his exploits and we have fun breaking it down- why it was good or not. I’ve seen Auggie with other people and it turned me on.” I blush and duck my head. I can’t believe I just admitted that to my brother.

Completely u
naffected by my embarrassment, Robbie continues his interrogation, “What’s stopping you, Willow?”

“
Truthfully, I fear rejection. I know that Auggie will want to play with someone other than me. Someday Auggie can have me whenever he wants me and he knows it. What’s the fun in that? Do you have any idea how humiliating it would be to go to the
Playroom
and be ignored?” I express my greatest fears to my brother and the embarrassment melts away. I know Rob understands and he will walk me through my issues.

“No, and you won’t
, either. I know what Kieren is to you, Willow.” Robbie smiles brightly as he’s hit with inspiration. “Kieren’s your playmate. You have fun together and it will overflow into the
Playroom
. Talk to Kieren about it, and for the love of God, when he says yes, open our Playroom!”

~Chapter Forty-Two~

I cowardly hide from Devon. I just can’t say goodbye to him. The finality would kill me. I never went back to see what Devon had to say for himself. It would be utter bullshit with that toxic poison flowing in his veins, altering his thoughts and reactions.

Five minutes ago
, I let Malcolm in the house to take Devon home to pack. I took one look at the devastated expression on Chief Mason’s face and ran. I couldn’t watch. What if Devon said no? If he says yes, in less than four hours, Devon will be gone.

I ran this time to where I was taught. I’d learned my measure at the hands of
Mr. Kline. I ran straight to him, knowing he will help me through this emptiness, just as he has for well over a month.

“I couldn’t say goodbye,” I breathe into the shadow-shrouded room.
Auggie doesn’t say anything. He simply parts his arms, waiting for me to fly into them. Auggie’s sitting upright at the head of the bed with a sketchpad in his lap.

“I couldn’t say goodbye to Tina, either. I
pushed Tina on the bus and turned my back on her until I heard the bus drive off. I walked away, never looking back,” Auggie wretchedly admits.

I can’t let Auggie
hold me yet. I sit on the edge of the bed that I haven’t been near since that stupid stunt Auggie pulled with Opal. Auggie comes to my room at night. He holds me until I fall asleep, and always following our rules, he leaves as soon as I fall into oblivion.

“I don’t really know you, Auggie. After knowing you every day of my life, I barely know you
at all. I learned the same thing when it came to my sister, too. I’ll spend every day from now on learning you,” I warn him that he’s stuck with me now.

“It’
s the dynamic between child and adult. We’re the same now, Willow. Ask and I will tell. You didn’t need to know what was happening with Tina. I knew I should’ve explained it to you as soon as I told you to leave our home. I realized that I went about it the wrong way. I should have told you why before I pushed you away. I think you understand the feeling now, though.”

“Devon isn’t my stepsibling
, but yeah… I have a feeling we’re experiencing similar heartache,” I murmur as I watch my finger follow the intricate swirling patter on the coverlet that used to be mine.

I bite my lip, but it doesn’t contain what spills out. “I want to open our
Playroom
.”

“What?” Auggie squeaks in shock.

“I think it’d be safer. You wouldn’t need to worry about someone from the club wandering in on the action. I know that Malcolm keeps you from getting into trouble because it’s not legal. Plus, it would be the best gift I could give Robbie. He’s salivating to use it up there,” I laugh.

“Are you sure, Willow? I assumed we’d leave it as it lies. I know what I did with Opal was fucking retarded, but what Devon did… I didn’t think you’d be able to play after he betrayed you like that.”

“What Devon did and what you did aren’t the same thing. You and I weren’t together, not intimately or otherwise. Devon was my boyfriend, and what he did was outside of the confines of our relationship. I just want you to be happy…”

“Don’t do this for me,” Auggie
warns. “I remember how you looked when you were staring at me that first time. I don’t want to ruin it and never see that expression on your face again.”

“I won’t know how I’m going to react until I do it. I’m sick of being scared,” I softly admit.

“Scared of what?” Auggie cautiously asks.

“I don’t know. I just am. The
Playroom
frightens me, so I need to conquer it.”

“No,
” Auggie denies me. “Not for that reason. I won’t let you open if that’s the case,” Auggie angrily mutters.

“I want a chance to fuck Kieren,” I declare before I can shut my mouth up. Where is t
hat fuckface when I need him? Kieren always has a palm to put over my mouth to shut my ass up. Auggie restlessly shifts on the bed, but I don’t look up at him. I just keep outlining the bedspread with a fingertip.

“
I’m going to ask Kieren to be my playmate. I’m sure it’s a very bad idea. I want to save Kieren, somehow. I want to see if I’m the one girl that can finally make him cum. I already feel the trill of power in my veins from just imagining it. It’s sick to say, but I want to know that I was both of my best friends first times- Devon’s virginity and Kieren’s first climax. What’s more disturbing is that I’ve replayed the same fantasy over and over when I masturbate. I’m twisted. I want to fuck him so badly. The thought of Kieren firing hot deep inside me almost makes me cum.”

“Monster,” Auggie groans, his breath shuddering out. “I think that just made me cum.”

“You did not,” I say flippantly. “You’re making fun of me.” I finally look up at Auggie and startle when his green gaze pierces me. He looks crazed. I flip around and slowly crawl up the bed. Sure enough, there is a damp spot on the front of Auggie’s pajama bottoms. I trace the outline of the Beast and Auggie grips the sheets, knuckles turning white.

“Hmmm…” I purr as I peel Auggie’
s pants down his thighs. As the pants reveal him, the Beast jerks up to great me. “I don’t think… I know for a fact that you just came from the thought of Kieren coming inside me,” I tease.

“Monster,”
Auggie grunts out- the Beast flexing like crazy. “You’ll let me watch, won’t you? I want to watch your face the first time Kieren enters you. I loved watching your first time with Devon, but every time after that was in private, and it killed me. If I could watch, then I could enjoy instead of feeling jealous. Please let me watch,” Auggie huskily pleads.

“I want you to,” spills from my throat. My voice is so needy that I shock myself. “It’s up to Kieren. I still have to ask him to play with me.”

“You don’t even need to ask. One look from you and Kieren will know. Uh- ahhh…” Auggie grunts and moans, his cock flexing the entire time, its slit beading moisture along the fat plum of his cockhead.

“Have you been safe?” I whisper.

“Yes, extremely safe,’ Auggie mutters, confusion lacing his voice.

“Devon and I were safe every time after the first. After what I’ve just seen, if we hadn’t been
, I wouldn’t allow anyone to touch me without getting checked out first. If you say you were safe, I believe you. I trust you,” I breathe.

I crawl up Auggie’
s body and look directly into his green eyes. I want my kiss. Earlier it was interrupted. I’m not taking any chances- no buildup of anticipation. I’m going for it.

Our lips connect- a reunion should be gentle and sweet, but this is Auggie and his Good Girl Willow Monster. I
brutally smash our lips together, and a second later I suck his bottom lip into my mouth. Feral sounds bubble up from our chests as we feed, devour, consume at one another’s mouths. Auggie is going nuts, but not touching me. He’s refraining from letting go, in fear he will hurt me. If I were to look, I’d bet his fingers are twisted in the bedsheets.

I don’t want foreplay, pretense, or anticipation. Months- almost six months I’ve waited, but in reality it’s been eighteen and a half years in the making.

Auggie is completely naked since he let me remove his pajama bottoms. The only thing I’m wearing is an ancient t-shirt of Auggie’s. Its short sleeves come to my forearms and the bottom brushes my knees. I act quickly, without thought. I want nothing to stop me, no interruptions. Hell, if Auggie says no, I’m ignoring him.

I straddle Auggie’
s hips and rock back in a practiced move I’d learned with Devon. “Monster,” Auggie screams as I forcefully impale myself on the Beast. While it may not be the first time, or the second… it’s third time’s a charm. The third time we join, my body swallows him whole.

I scream Auggie’s
name for an entirely different reason. No doubt there will be blood, but it’s worth it. Never again will Auggie think I’m not woman enough- no, I was proving it to myself.

I rip off the t-shirt and fling it across the room. I lean back slightly so that we can both look down to where we are joined. The soft patch of fuzz at the apex of my thighs is the only sight to see. I took
all of the Beast, not many can, he’d said. My body is protesting like a sonofabitch because of it, though.

“Willow,” Auggie rasps out- awe filling his voice as he stares down at our union. There is an edge of panic that rings from his tone that I choose to ignore.

I breathe through the agony. Auggie can’t know how my body is screaming- the walls of my vagina clenching, not from climax, but extraction- trying to push the Beast from our body. It burns, stings, feels bruised- torn. A wet trickle warms my thighs. I lean forward and take Auggie’s lips in a fierce open-mouthed kiss to hide my body’s bleeding reaction to our coupling.

My eyes flutter shut as the kiss turns from aggressive to gentle. Auggie’s hands unlatch from thei
r bedsheet prison to firmly rest on my hips- his nails biting into my tender flesh. He pulls his hips back as his hands guide my body away from him. He waits for a suspended moment with just an inch or two inside me, and then slowly glides all the way back in until our bodies fuse as one again.

I can no longer kiss Auggie
as sensation shoots through my body. My flesh beads with goosebumps and turns feverous. A tingling starts at the base of my spine and radiates outward. My muscles clench and quiver in delight. My eyelids droop in pleasure, but not nearly as badly as my mouth. I rock against Auggie, gape-mouthed, panting in erratic puffs.

Auggie’s hot mouth latches onto my nipple, sucking part of my breast into his mouth
, too. His teeth close over my flesh and press until I scream his name. A satisfied grunt radiates against my breast, its vibrations adding to the thrill of the pleasure. I whimper when he pulls away.

“Your tits are bigger than last time. I’ve gradually noticed, but I feared what you’d say if
I mentioned it.” Auggie unhinges his jaw and sucks as much of my breast into his mouth. I look down in shock. He couldn’t take it all in- they are bigger.  Halle-fucking-lujah! Birthday wishes do eventually come true.

I rest my cheek against Auggie’
s hot neck and ride the waves of pleasure pulsing between my thighs. It’s painfully sweet. Auggie is a large, burly man. He makes me feel safe. Such huge hands caress me with a profound gentleness. Muscles that hunger to unleash their true power, bunch and flex, tighten and loosen, fighting their need to drive into me in a capacity that would tear me in half.

“Monster,” Auggie releases a tortured moan. “You’re so fucking tight. My God… Ugh,” he grunts. “I’m going to cum any second. I’ve waited to
o long for this moment. I don’t have the patience to make it good for you while I fight myself. Lean forward,” he softly commands as his hands guide me to where he wants me.

A large hand settles at the small of my back and presses me to his
broad chest. Auggie gives an experienced twist of his hips, “Auuggggiiieeee,” I keen when my clit rubs on the silky base of the Beast. My body dances along his- seeking the exquisite pleasurable pain that only he can administer.