Goosebumps Most Wanted #5: Dr. Maniac Will See You Now (3 page)

My knees wobbled. I almost fell off the bed.

Bree tossed her blond hair behind her shoulder. She tilted her head and squinted at me. “Richard? What are you
doing
?” she demanded.

“Uh …”

What could I say? No way I could tell her I was the Masked Monkey with the strength of ten gorillas.

“Well … it’s a special exercise,” I said. “It’s supposed to help me get rid of my allergies.”

I couldn’t tell if she believed me or not. She just kept squinting at me with those clear, beautiful green eyes.

She wore a green sweater that matched her eyes, and a short pleated skirt over dark jeans.

I jumped off the bed. I brushed back my hair with one hand. My face was sweaty. Being a gorilla was hard work.

Bree stepped into the room and glanced around. She studied the Mamba Mama poster over my bed. “Ooh, sick,” she said. “That woman is part snake?”

“Well, she’s a teacher in a nursery school. But she can transform into a deadly, venomous snake when she wants to,” I explained.

Bree rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

I sat down on the edge of my bed. “What are you doing here?” I asked.

She rolled her eyes again. “Good question. I guess it’s just my lucky day.”

Bree is very sarcastic. I’m kind of used to it. We’ve been in the same class since kindergarten. I think I had a crush on her when we were five. Even after she dumped the class ant farm on my head.

She plopped down on my desk chair. “Richard, you know Mrs. Callus teamed partners up for museum projects,” she said.

“She did?”

“You have to stop daydreaming in class, Richard. She did — and you’re my museum partner. I was the lucky one to get you.”

“Cool,” I said.

I knew she was being sarcastic again. But so what? Bree and I working on a project together? How awesome was that?

“So, I guess we have to do this project together,” she said. “But you have to promise me one thing.”

“What is it?” I asked.

“You have to promise you won’t tell anyone we’re working together.”

I thought about it for a few seconds. “Okay.”

“Raise your right hand and swear.”

I raised my right hand and swore. “I won’t tell anyone we’re working together.”

“Okay.” She settled back on the chair. She picked up the little statue of my favorite comic villain, the Scab. She rolled it around in her hand. “Oh, sick. Why is it so scratchy?”

“He has a lot of scabs,” I said. “Be careful with that. It was a birthday present.”

She squinted at me. “You’re not normal, are you?”

That made me laugh.

“I’m not joking,” she said. She set the Scab down next to my autographed photo of the Caped Wolf. Then she jumped to her feet. “I have to get out of here. This room is making me nauseous.”

“Does that mean you don’t want to do our project in the Comic Book Museum?” I asked.

She stuck her finger down her throat and made a barfing sound. I guessed that meant no.

I followed her to the door. “Bree, do you want to get an A?”

“Of course.”

“Then we’ll do the Comic Book Museum,” I said. “I know everything about it. Every corner. Every display. Every everything.”

“So?”

“So, I’ll do all the work. I’ll do the whole project. It will be fun for me. And I promise we’ll get an A.”

She crossed her arms in front of her and squinted at me for a long time. “You’ll do all the work?”

I raised my right hand again. “I swear.”

She thought about it a while. Then she tossed back her blond hair. “Okay, I guess.”

“Awesome,” I said. “So you’ll take the bus with me to the museum after school tomorrow?”

“No. I’ll meet you there. I don’t want anyone from school seeing us together.” She spun away and hurried down the stairs.

This is going to work out great!
I thought.

The next morning, my head felt like a water balloon. And I was a total snot machine. I sneezed so hard, I thought I would blow my head off. And my eyes were running so badly, I could barely see.

I started to brush my teeth and sneezed all over the bathroom mirror. I tried to wipe my eyes with a towel, but they kept running like the water fountain at school that you can’t turn off.

I pulled on some clothes and went down to breakfast. Mom and Dad were already arguing, something about whether it was a windy day or not.

I sat down in my place across from Ernie. He had oatmeal smeared all over his chin. He opened his mouth wide, showing me the mushed-up oatmeal inside.

Is he gross enough?

I picked up the Pop-Tart on my plate and took a bite of it. My favorite. Cherry.

“We’re supposed to have thirty-mile-per-hour winds,” Dad said.

“You call that wind? Barry, that’s no wind at all,” Mom replied.

“I didn’t say it was a hurricane,” Dad snapped. “Why don’t you ever listen to me?”

“Why don’t you ever say anything worth listening to?”

Ernie grabbed the Pop-Tart off my plate and shoved it into his mouth.

“Hey — that’s mine!” I cried. I grabbed for it. But he giggled and swung his head away from my grasp, chewing furiously.

“Mom? Dad? Ernie stole my Pop-Tart!” I shouted.

They both turned to Ernie. “It’s cherry,” Mom said. “That’s Ernie’s favorite.”

“But — but —” I sputtered.

“He was just being funny,” Mom said, smiling at him. “Let him have it, Richard.”

“You eat too many sweets,” Dad said to me. “Why don’t you go get a grapefruit from the fridge.”

“Huh? A grapefruit?”

Mom poked Dad on the chest. “Are you saying I don’t give him a healthy breakfast? Are you saying I don’t feed the kids right?”

I tuned them out. I only wanted to think about after school today. Bree and me meeting at the Comic Book Museum. I couldn’t wait to show it off to her.

I blew my nose three or four times and wiped my runny eyes. Then I pulled on my jacket and flung my backpack over my shoulder. I walk Ernie to school every morning. And every morning he thinks it’s a riot to jump on my back and shout, “Piggyback! Piggyback!”

It’s not funny. This morning, he leaped onto my back and sent me crashing headfirst into the wall.

A few minutes later, we crossed Orlando Street and turned onto Kubert. It was a cool autumn day. Red and yellow leaves rained down from the trees as the wind swirled around.

I zipped my jacket to the top. “Whoa. Wait.” I grabbed Ernie by the shoulder.

Was I seeing things?

I blinked my runny eyes, struggling to clear them.
Yes!
I saw two figures scampering across the red roof of the Romita family’s house across the street.

But — but —

“No way!” I gasped.

They were both bent over as they darted across the roof. Both dressed from head to foot in green.

I wiped my eyes and stared hard.
This is impossible. It can’t be!

I was staring at the Frog Mutant — Captain Croaker. And he was followed by his little sidekick, Terry Tadpole.

“Hey — is that
you
?” I shouted up at them.

I was staring into the sun. I couldn’t see clearly at all. They disappeared to the other side of the roof.

My heart was pounding. My brain spun.

I grabbed Ernie by the shoulders. “Did you see them?” I cried. “Did you see it, too?”

He nodded. “Yeah. I saw it.”

“You did?” I shouted, still gripping his shoulders. “I’m not crazy? You saw it, too?”

“Yeah. I saw that red car go by,” Ernie said. “The one with the dog hanging out the window.”

“Huh?” I let go of him and staggered back. “You — you didn’t see those two guys on the roof? The guys in green costumes?”

He shook his head. “I didn’t see anyone on a roof.”

How could he see them? They’re not real.

I stood there, in a daze. I stared at the roof. Empty now. A bird landed on the chimney. It fluttered its wings and settled down, like it owned the house.

I let out a cry as Ernie stomped on my foot as hard as he could. “You little creep!” I screamed. “Why’d you do that?”

He shrugged. “Just felt like it, I guess.”

I limped the rest of the way to his school. I thought maybe the little brat broke a hundred bones in my foot. But I wasn’t thinking about the pain. I was thinking about Captain Croaker and Terry Tadpole.

I saw them so clearly. It
had
to be them.

But how could it be?

I felt totally confused. I thought about it all day.

After school, I looked for Bree. Maybe she had changed her mind — maybe she wanted to take the bus with me to the Comic Book Museum. But I didn’t see her anywhere.

I sat in the back of the bus as it bounced into town. I couldn’t wait to tell Kahuna what I saw on the Romita family’s roof. I was sure he’d believe me. And I knew he’d have ideas about why I saw them. Like maybe there’s a comic book costume contest in town.

I ran up the steep concrete steps and burst through the double glass doors. Then I flew across the main hall to the welcome desk. “Kahuna!” I started.

Whoa. He wasn’t there.

Instead, a tall masked man, dressed in a tight costume of green and yellow, stared back at me from the other side of the desk. Two curled white fangs on his mask moved as he leaned toward me.

Once I got over my surprise, I recognized him. The SnakeMan from Saturn. “Why are you here, sssssonny?” he hissed.

“Uh … I’m … uh …” I took a breath. “That’s an awesome costume,” I said. “Did you make it?”

He didn’t answer. The fangs appeared to curl tighter on the sides of his mask. His face was covered except for his eyes and mouth. He opened his lips, and a black forked tongue flicked out.

Oh, wow. How does he do that? He’s a total freak!

“Where is Big Kahuna?” I asked.

“Who issss he?” he asked. The split tongue darted from side to side, then disappeared back into his mouth.

“He … he works here in the afternoon,” I stammered. That tongue was too
weird
.

The costumed man brought his face close to mine. His eyes were green-yellow. “I don’t think sssso,” he said.

He was definitely creeping me out. I turned to the front doors to see if Bree had arrived. No. Not yet.

“My friend and I are doing a project about this museum,” I said. “You know. A school project.”

The masked man shook his head. “No. You’re not,” he rasped. Through the mask, the weird yellow-green eyes burned into mine.

A chill ran down my back. I retreated a few steps. “I … don’t understand,” I stammered.

“You have to leave,” he said. “This museum is closed.”

I took another step back, away from the desk — and realized the man was standing in the wastebasket. He made a hissing snake sound as he stepped out of it.

He slithered out from behind the desk. The white fangs on his mask glowed under the bright ceiling lights. His green-yellow eyes narrowed.

“We’re clossssssed,” he hissed. “Go away. Go do your project at another museum.”

What was going
on
here? How could this be happening?

I was so startled and confused, I froze.

He moved quickly. He stepped up to me. His eyes were terrifying. His mouth opened again, revealing the black forked tongue.

“Please —” I uttered. “Don’t hurt me. Don’t —” My breath caught in my throat.

To my shock, he stepped past me. His eyes were on the front doors now. He raised a yellow-gloved hand and pulled a long strand of web from the shoulder of his costume.

Frozen to the floor, I watched him pull the web — like a slender rope — from his shoulder. Ignoring me completely, he walked to the doors. He pushed them open. Then he flung the long strand of rope into the air — and leaped onto it!

The rope rose high, carrying him into the air. Through the glass doors, I could see him cross the street standing stiffly on the flying rope, higher … higher … until he vanished from view.

Whoa.

I suddenly realized I’d stopped breathing at least a minute ago. I let out my breath in a long whoosh. Then I sank to my knees on the marble floor.

I was stunned. In shock.
I must be insanely insane
, I thought.

“What just happened?” I muttered to myself. I rubbed my eyes. I gazed around the empty museum. “I didn’t see that. I didn’t see the SnakeMan from Saturn sail out of here on his Wonder Web.”

I stayed down on my knees, struggling to catch my breath. I pictured him slithering out of the wastebasket, his fangs curling on the sides of his mask. Moving toward me … hissing at me …

“The museum is closed,”
he said.

But how could that be?

Where was Kahuna? Where was anyone else?

I opened my mouth in a loud sneeze. Like an explosion, it echoed off the high walls. I sneezed again. I couldn’t stop it.

I was still sneezing, still on my knees, when the museum doors opened.

I turned to the doors — and let out a scream.

“What are
you
doing here?”