Great Lion of God (103 page)

He moved across the deck for fear he would be too stricken with grief, and he stared across the plain of light which was the Great Sea and which would bear him to Rome. He was only a man. How could he endure it that never again would he see his kindred, nor hear the sounds of his country, but be forever an exile, going into an unknown future and to an unknown death? He would not be buried in this sacred soil. He knew that as surely as he knew that he was departing. What earth would hold his bones? What friends would mourn him? He looked at the sky which was too radiant to gaze upon, and he dropped his chin on his folded arms and it seemed to him that he had lived too long and was too weary. Of what use was he now, to God, an old man, when youth was needed? God deserved the young to witness for Him.

Then, as he leaned his arms on the railing and his head was bent upon them in a prostration of human sorrow, it seemed to him that he heard the voice of his father, Hillel ben Borush, as he had heard it in his youth, and the voice of Hillel was tender and strong and loving and prayerful:

“‘
O God, You are my God!

Early will I seek You
.

My soul thirsts for You

In a dry and thirsty land,

Where no water is
;

To see Your power and Your glory
,

So I have seen You in the Sanctuary
,

Because of Your lovingkindness
,

Is better than life!

My lips shall praise You
,

Thus will I bless You while I live!

I will lift up my hands in Your Name
,

My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness
.

And my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips
—’”

“‘
My soul follows hard after You
—!’”

Saul lifted his head and took a last look at his land, for the ship was moving and the sails were filled with wind and light. His eyes welled with tears, but his lips smiled with love, and he lifted his hand and said,

“Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God, the Lord is One!”

His soul was strong again, and young. He saw his country drop below the curve of the world and he knew that the Messias would return again to His people and all the earth would rejoice, crying, “Hosannah!” For all nations were His own.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

The Holy Bible

Reader’s Digest Articles on the Apostles

Josephus
Antiquities
, etc.

Juvenal

The Vatican Libraries

Life
Magazine, 1964, Series on the Bible

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Philostratus

Pliny

St. Jerome,
Comments on Philippians

W. P. Davies,
Paul and Rabbinic Judaism

The Catholic Encyclopedia

A. Dreissman,
Paul

R. A. Knox,
St Paul’s Gospel

W. M. Ramsay,
St. Paul the Traveler and Roman Citizen

J. Lebreton and J. Zeiller,
The History of Primitive Christianity

G. Ricciotti,
Paul the Apostle

Max I. Dimont,
Jews, God and History

Henri Daniel-Rops,
The Heroes of God and Jesus and His Times

The Metamorphoses of Ovid

Tacitus
History

Aubrey de Selincourt,
The Early History of Rome

Dr. Hugh S. Schonfield,
Those Incredible Christians

Aristotle’s
Politics and Ethics

Charles M. Bakewell,
Source Book in Ancient Philosophy

Phaedo of Plato

And literally hundreds of other books concerning Roman, Greek and Jewish history, and the history of Christianity, too numerous to mention.

AUTHOR’S NOTE

“Many novels and books about St. Paul have told in marvelous detail what he did and accomplished in his life and missionary journeys. I am concerned with what he was, a man like ourselves with our own despairs, doubts, anxieties and angers and intolerances, and ‘lusts of the flesh.’ Many books have been concerned with the Apostle. I am concerned with the man, the human being, as well as the dauntless saint.”

“It may cheer many—and depress others—to realize that man never really changes and the exact problems of Paul’s world are the same that confront us today. But man’s nature can never be changed in any particular except by the power of God and religion, and if I can influence in this book only ten people, I will feel I have succeeded.”

Taylor Caldwell