Authors: Stephanie James
"I've been thinking."
Rani closed her eyes, afraid of what was coming. It was much too soon. Sooner than she had expected. But she would not cry. She had known this moment would arrive sooner or later and
she would not cry
. She had lived with the knowledge in the back of her mind since she had met Flint Cottrell. You couldn't hold a free-ranging alley cat if he didn't want to stay.
"I guess I was hoping for later," she whispered.
Flint shifted to look down at her. She felt his fingers under her chin lifting her face. Bravely she opened her eyes, her lashes damp with unshed tears.
"You're crying," he accused softly.
"No. I told myself I wouldn't cry."
"Please don't cry, Rani."
She tried a tiny smile. "I won't."
"What did you mean, you hoped for later?" he demanded urgently.
"I was hoping that you'd choose to hang around a while longer. I knew you'd leave sooner or later. I'd hoped for later."
He swore softly. "I knew it. That's exactly what I've been thinking about this morning. Damn it, Rani."
"It's all right, Flint. I'm a big girl and I've known all along what was coming. I was prepared for this when I took my risk."
"It is not all right," he snapped. "
I've
known all along you didn't trust me to stay. It's been driving me crazy."
"It's not a question of trust. It's a question of understanding," she protested gently. "I do understand, Flint. Honest."
"The hell you do. Listen to me, Rani Garroway, and listen good. I'm not leaving. I can't leave. I don't want to leave. Can't you get it through your stubborn little head that I'm home now? You couldn't get rid of me if you tried."
Frantically she tried to stifle the flare of hope that was threatening to overwhelm her. "You're not leaving now that you've done your duty by my uncle?"
"Now you're finally catching on. Rani, I came here because of a feeling that I owed Ambrose something. I'd been too late to protect him, but I thought I might be able to protect his niece. But that's not why I'm staying. I want a home with you, Rani. Now do you understand?"
She smiled tremulously. "Let's just say I'm more than willing to be convinced."
He sighed. "That's what I was thinking about just now. Convincing you."
"Oh, Flint, I didn't mean it that way," she said anxiously, terrified that he'd misunderstood her tiny attempt at lightness.
"No, you're absolutely right. You deserve to be convinced."
"Flint, wait a minute, you don't understand."
He shook his head, leaning back against the pillow. Rani recognized with dismay the stubborn, set expression in his emerald eyes. "I'm going to take the time to convince you, Rani. According to the legend of the ring, the other men who found themselves in my situation eventually took drastic action. They forced their women into marriage. But I'm not going to do it that way. This isn't a legend we're living here, it's for real. I want things done properly. I don't want to push you. I'll show you I know what I'm doing and that I'm here to stay. I'll prove you can trust me."
"How?" She was deeply wary now.
"Weil go back to Santa Rosa, your town, your neighborhood. I'll get a regular job. A nine-to-five job. Something with a real desk and an office copier. A job with benefit plans and retirement plans and sick leave. I can find one. Hell, I can do just about anything, I'll show you I'm capable of taking care of a family and that I've got the determination to stick around for the long haul. In a few months, when I've settled into the routine and you're confident I'm not going to disappear in the middle of the night, we'll get married. In a year or two, when you're really convinced I'm reliable, we can talk about having a kid. I'd like a child, Rani, but I realize a woman has to be sure of a man before she takes that kind of risk. All along I've wanted you to take a risk on me, but I know it's not fair of me to ask you to do that until I've given you some evidence that I'm going to make a dependable husband and father."
"Flint…"
"The thing is, Rani," he went on very seriously, "we really shouldn't wait too long to have a kid. I'm getting close to forty and you've just turned thirty. Biological clocks and all that stuff, you know. We won't be able to postpone it too long. Do you think it will take too long for me to prove myself to you?"
Rani leaned over him, her eyes very brilliant with her love. "Flint, there is absolutely no need to go through all of that. If you say you're going to stay, that's all the proof I need. I love you, Cottrell. I trust you." She brushed her mouth against his, willing him to respond.
"I love you, Rani."
His voice was husky and weighted with emotion. Rani could have sworn there was a trace of dampness in the emerald fires of his eyes. The thought fascinated her. She nestled close, offering comfort and love as Flint's big hand stroked heavily through her tangled hair. He kissed her with a deep need and a promise that filled her with hope and trust in the future. He did love her. Rani was certain of it.
"Can we get married now?" she demanded teasingly as Flint slowly broke the kiss.
"In a few months," he said firmly. "When you're sure of me."
"Flint, please, there's no need for this."
"This is the best way, Rani."
"According to you! Flint, this is crazy," Rani said, knowing already she was virtually helpless against the stubborn streak in him.
"Trust me, Rani."
"I don't seem to have any choice," she said unhappily. "There's just one thing I won't tolerate, Flint Cottrell."
He smiled crookedly. "What's that?"
"No nine-to-five desk job for you. I can't see you behind a desk."
"What would you suggest?"
"I suggest," she said, "that you find a job doing what you do best."
Two months later Flint pushed open the small wrought-iron gate and started up the garden walk of his new home. He examined the gingerbread trim around the windows as he climbed the porch steps. He'd finished painting it the day before and was pleased with the way it looked. The next step was the plumbing. A man could devote a lifetime to plumbing repairs if he wasn't careful. But women were fussy about good plumbing. He couldn't ask Rani to move in until he got the kitchen remodeled and the new shower installed. Another month or two would give him time to take care of the basics. Then he could talk seriously to Rani about taking the risk of marrying him.
The old Victorian house had been in a very dilapidated condition when he'd found it. The owners had given him an incredible deal, and Flint had grabbed it. He was good at grabbing an opportunity when it arose. He'd moved out of his apartment and into the old house at once.
Flint liked the neighborhood. It wasn't far from Rani's place, and there was plenty of space around the house for a garden. He liked the town, too. Santa Rosa was a good size but not overcrowded. The mountains were near, and San Francisco could be reached in an hour's drive. A good town for raising kids and flowers. Flint stood on the porch, surveying his domain with a satisfied gaze. Everything was falling into place very nicely. Soon, another couple of months at most, everything would be perfect.
Rani had been persistent at first, trying everything from logic to tantrums to convince him to at least let her move in with him. But Flint had stood firm. He had insisted Rani stay in her own place during what he called his trial period. True, he saw her nearly every evening for dinner and frequently spent the night, but he thought he'd managed to keep the affair as free of outright coercion as possible. He wanted her to be sure of him. He wanted her to trust him completely before he took the final step. In another couple of months he thought she would have enough evidence of his new, domesticated ways.
Pleased with himself, Flint unlocked the front door, stepped inside the hall and nearly tripped over Zipp. The cat sat on his haunches, meowing quietly in welcome. Flint stood stock-still, staring down at the big animal.
"What are you doing here, Zipp?"
Before the cat could answer, Flint caught an aroma of a rich fish stew wafting down the hall from the old kitchen. Curiously he walked forward, Zipp at his heels.
"Rani?"
She looked up from the salad she was preparing on the cracked drainboard and smiled brilliantly. She was wearing a loud crimson-and-yellow sweater over a pair of black trousers and, as always, she looked sexy and sweet. God, how he loved her, Flint thought even as he narrowed his eyes in a reproving frown.
"Hello, Flint." She dropped the spinach leaves and came forward to kiss him lightly on the mouth. Then she returned industriously to her salad. "How are things at the nursery?"
"Fine. The shipment of Christmas trees arrived from that supplier in Reed Lake," he said automatically. "Just in time. And we got the fancy tulip bulbs from Holland today. I've got a long line of customers waiting for them." He directed his gaze pointedly at the salad. "Rani, what are you doing here? We're supposed to have dinner at your place tonight. I just came home to change my clothes."
She scanned his dirt-stained jeans. "Yes, why don't you do that? You've got potting soil all over you." She began slicing mushrooms. "I'll pour us both a glass of wine while you're washing up."
He hesitated, aware of a distinct feeling of being gently manipulated. This was the first time Rani had cooked a meal in his new house. The place wasn't ready for her. Unable to think of quite what to do about the change of plans, Flint decided the simplest thing was to wash up as she had instructed. He went down the hall to the bathroom.
Stepping inside, he realized Rani had changed more than just the evening's dinner plans. There was a new toothbrush standing beside his own in the glass that sat on the chipped sink. When he opened the cabinet, he found an array of feminine items inside that certainly didn't belong to him. He stood scowling at a pink deodorant bottle and then slowly shut the cabinet door.
He washed the traces of rich soil from his hands. Running a large professional nursery was a dirty business, but the dirt was clean. Not like some of the dirt he'd had on his hands during his former life. He'd fallen into the nursery management job with his usual luck. A little fast talking and some convincing displays of his gardening skills, as well as his management skills, had persuaded the owner, Mr. Rodriguez, that he knew what he was doing. Once he'd been sure Rani wholeheartedly approved of the work and didn't find it "unprofessional," Flint had launched into the job with enthusiasm. Now Rodriguez was talking about retiring. He had inquired that day if his new manager was interested in purchasing the business. Terms could be worked out. He was a flexible man. Flint hadn't hesitated, he'd said yes immediately. Owning the nursery would speed up the approach of the day when he would feel he had a right to ask Rani to marry and move in with him. His new life was falling into place the way he'd planned.
Flint realized he thought of his life in two segments now— BR and AR. Before Rani and After Rani. He didn't waste time dwelling on the BR portion of his existence. Rani and the future were all that mattered.
Flint rinsed his hands and eyed the rest of the bathroom. Rani's hairbrush was sitting on the counter along with a red plastic comb. He dried his rough palms on a towel and left the bathroom for the bedroom. A suspicion was growing steadily in his mind.
When he opened the closet doors, he knew he was right. To the right of his drab collection of work shirts and pants hung an array of brightly colored blouses, skirts and blaz-ers. Underneath them was a neat row of sandals and high-heeled shoes. Flint just stood there, staring, until he sensed Rani at the doorway behind him.
Slowly he turned to look at her. "You've moved in."
She nodded once, her mouth set in a determined line, although there was a faint wariness in her eyes. She held the salad tongs in front of her as if in self-defense. "I've waited long enough. I decided to use your own technique and not ask for permission. If we do things your way we might go on waiting another couple of months. I'm not interested in waiting any longer. I love you, Flint, and you love me. It's high time we got married."
"I wanted you to be sure of me. I didn't want you to think you had to take a risk on me."
She smiled and stepped forward, putting her arms around his neck. "I suppose you could say that just living day to day is a series of risks. I've decided some risks are much more interesting than others, however. I've waited a long time to find a man who's worth taking a chance on. Now that I've found him, I'm afraid there's hardly any risk involved at all. You, Flint Cottrell, are a sure thing."
"Do you really believe that, Rani?" He wrapped his arms around her, aware that his hands were trembling slightly.
"With all my heart," she whispered.
"
Rani
." He caught her face between his palms and kissed her with rough eagerness. "Rani, I swear I won't let you down. Ever."
"I know," she said simply. "I swear I won't ever let you down, either."
When Flint lifted his mouth from hers at last, his emerald eyes were gleaming. Rani looked wonderingly into their depths.
"Green fire," she murmured.
"What are you talking about?" he asked with sensual humor.
"Dewhurst said that in real emeralds there was a green fire that captured anyone who looked deeply into the stones." She had to admit she'd never really seen anything that qualified as fire in the Clayborne ring that presently resided in a safe-deposit box, but when she looked into Flint's eyes she believed what Charles Dewhurst had said. "He was right."
When spring arrived the old Victorian house was looking very pleased with itself. It had just about everything a house could want. There was a large cat who spent most of his time dozing on the freshly painted porch, a man and a woman who filled the inside with passion and love, and a truly spectacular garden. Neighbors always stopped to gaze at the velvet lawn and the unbelievable wealth of plants and flowers. Everyone agreed that the Cottrell garden was the marvel of the neighborhood.