Griffin's Shadow (41 page)

“I can’t help but feel I’ve let all hikui down.” Jelena stared morosely into the dark green depths of her tea. She wasn’t sure she wanted to be the symbol of hope for an entire group of people—the burden seemed too enormous.

“You’ve done no such thing, sweet girl. No reasonable person expects you to change, single-handedly, an unjust system that’s been in place since Alasiri has been a nation. You don’t realize the enormous value of you simply being who you are. In the short time you’ve been living in Sendai, the attitudes of the okui are starting to change. Oh, it’s subtle, but it’s real. I can feel it, and so can others.”

“How do you mean?” Jelena asked.

“I overheard two okui merchants talking in the market the other day. One actually wondered aloud whether it seemed fair to continue to deny hikui artisans membership in the guilds when so many of them were as skilled, or more so, than their okui counterparts. It may not sound like much, but it’s definitely a start.”

Jelena massaged her belly and closed her eyes, focusing her thoughts inward on her soon-to-be born daughter, Hatora. Most okui mothers could touch the minds of their children while they floated safe in the womb, but Jelena had yet to feel the consciousness of her own baby. Disappointed at first, she had soon become resigned to it, though she still tried from time to time.

“I pray that when my daughter is my age, she will live in a different world than we do, Sateyuka.”

“I pray for that also.”

Without warning, a sharp pain rippled across Jelena’s belly. She grunted in surprise.

“What is it?” Sateyuka came to the edge of her chair.

“I’m not sure,” Jelena said slowly. “I’ve never experienced labor before, so I don’t quite know what to expect. It felt like a labor pain…I think.” She screwed up her face in concentration, focusing on the sensations of her body.

Yes, something most definitely feels different!

“Jelena, if you’re starting your labor, you can’t walk back up the hill to the castle alone. I’ll come with you.” Sateyuka rose to her feet. “Let’s get your boots back on now.”

“Nothing’s going to happen for hours, Sateyuka. I’m sure I can get home on my own. Please don’t put yourself out.”

“Stop it right now. Of course I’m coming with you, and I’ll have no more arguments!”

Jelena shut up and allowed her friend to help her to her feet and into her still-damp boots. She waited by the front door while Sateyuka went to fetch their outerwear. As she waited, another ripple of pain coursed through her. She groaned through gritted teeth, clutching the door post for support.

No doubt about what’s happening now!

“You’re having another cramp,” Sateyuka stated as she emerged from the back of her house carrying Jelena’s things, a dusky purple cloak thrown over her own heavy dress. Jelena nodded, feeling a little light-headed from the pain. Sateyuka helped her don her cloak, then threw open the front door and grabbed Jelena’s arm. “Hold on tight and lean on me if you need to. Let’s get you home.”

Mercifully, the rain had stopped, though gray clouds still scudded overhead. A cold, wet breeze splattered droplets against their cloaks as they walked. No one paid any attention to them, for which Jelena was thankful. Once, an elderly well-dressed okui man—rushing along with an air of importance—collided with Sateyuka, knocking her backward.

“Watch where you’re going, clumsy hikui!” the man growled as he swept past.

Jelena stifled the urge to yell out a retort. “So much for changing attitudes!” she commented ruefully.

“I said the changes were subtle,” Sateyuka replied, smiling. “How are you doing?”

“Fine, so far. No more pains…yet.”

Jelena’s body spared her any further contractions until just before she and Sateyuka passed through the outer gates of the castle complex. Jelena leaned heavily on her friend until the spasm subsided. She gulped several deep breaths and managed a weak smile. “If it hurts like this now, I don’t know how I’m going to stand it when things really get going!” she said.

“You’ll do just fine, sweet girl. Let’s go, now.”

The guards standing to either side of the massive portals snapped to attention when the two women came into view. Recognizing the king’s daughter, they allowed her and Sateyuka to pass through unchallenged, as did the guards at the inner gates.

“I’d be honored if you would attend me, Sateyuka. I was planning to ask you before now, but I didn’t expect Hatora to come today!”

“I’m the one who’s honored, but are you sure? You must already have many women to attend you as well as your doctor. Perhaps I’d only get in the way.” Sateyuka gave Jelena’s hand a squeeze.

“I want you with me,” Jelena replied, “but if you can’t, I’ll understand. I know you have your own business and family to attend to, and they need you more than I do.”

“If you want me with you, then I’ll stay. I must send a message to my daughter, though, so she knows where I am.”

“Yes, of course.”

In truth, Jelena would have many attendants during the birth, but besides Eikko, none would be hikui. And though she considered Eikko a friend, Jelena wanted the presence of another hikui who was not also a servant.

The two friends walked through the main entrance of the castle, the crisp snap of the guards’ salute echoing off the stone as they passed. Jelena led the way through the quiet, elegant halls toward her apartments. As they walked, Sateyuka stared about her, wide eyed. Seeing her friend’s awe brought back Jelena’s own memories of her first days spent within these walls, before she knew for sure she belonged here.

Jelena paused just outside the doors to her private quarters.

“I’m surprised to see no guards here,” Sateyuka commented.

“My father tried posting some, but I kept sending them away. I finally convinced him there’s simply no need. I’m just not that important.”

“Jelena, that’s not true,” Sateyuka chided. “To your family, especially…”

Jelena smiled. “All I meant is that I’m not important politically. Welcome to my home, dear friend. I should have invited you here long ago. Please forgive me?”

“There’s nothing to forgive, sweet girl,” Sateyuka replied.

Jelena pushed open the doors, calling out a greeting as she did so. Eikko came scurrying from the back room, a little breathless, as usual.

“I didn’t expect you back so soon, Highness. I was just getting…Oh!” Eikko halted in mid-sentence upon catching sight of a stranger accompanying her mistress.

“Eikko, this is my friend Sateyuka the weaver, the one I visit down in Jokimichi,” Jelena explained. “Sateyuka, this is Eikko, my companion.” Jelena refused to call Eikko her servant.

“H…How do you do?” Eikko stammered, clearly a little flustered. “Highness, if I’d known you were bringing a guest, I’d have tidied up a little better and ordered some tea from the kitchen! I…”

“Don’t worry about that, child,” Sateyuka interjected soothingly. “We have much more important business to attend to right now. The princess has begun her labor.”

Eikko gulped, then let out a little squeak. Her eyes widened in so comic a fashion that both Jelena and Sateyuka burst out laughing. At that precise moment, Jelena realized, for the first time since she had learned of Ashinji’s death, she felt truly happy again.

“Summon a messenger, Eikko. Sateyuka must get word to her family that she’s staying with me and…Oh, yes! Send word to Sonoe and my mother-in-law.”

“Yes, Highness! Ohhhh, this is so exciting!” the young hikui girl squealed.

Jelena felt serene, strong, and unafraid of the ordeal to come
.

Soon, I will hold you in my arms, Hatora. Any amount of pain will be worth enduring because I’m bringing you into the world.

Jelena had finally accepted Ashinji’s death, but despite what she knew to be true, she had yet to lose a sense of connectedness to him. Her soul still felt joined to the unique spiritual essence that had defined Ashinji as a person, so much so, that she could almost believe he still lived.

Jelena steadfastly clung to that connection—the only thing that had kept her sane during the long, terrible winter.

Another pain caught her by surprise, wringing a startled cry from her lips. A gush of warm liquid sluiced down her legs to puddle on the matting beneath her feet.

“I think my daughter’s coming very soon!” she gasped.

“Come with me now, my dear. Let’s get you undressed.” Sateyuka took her by the elbow and steered her toward the bedchamber. Jelena allowed Sateyuka to help her strip down to her shift, then sat on the edge of the bed while her friend massaged her back. The pain gradually subsided.

Jelena chuckled as she brushed a stray coil of sweat-dampened hair from her face. “Hatora wants to be born before anyone is ready for her. Do you think my daughter will always be so headstrong?”

“Your daughter will possess all of the best qualities of both her parents,” Sateyuka replied, smiling. “I never got to meet your Ashinji, but I feel as if I know him from all that you’ve told me. He would be proud of you.”

Yes, he would,
Jelena thought.

~~~

“Now, Princess! Push hard!”

Gritting her teeth, Jelena bore down and delivered her daughter into the waiting hands of the doctor. Exhausted after hours of labor, she relaxed into the mound of pillows piled at her back and let her mind drift.

For a while, the world dissolved into a soft blur. The angry wail of her newborn daughter and the delighted cries of the women surrounding her floated through her consciousness like clouds across the summer sky. She saw Ashinji, standing before her, his head cocked as if listening for something. The sensation of his presence felt so strong, she cried out to him.

“Jelena, wake up… It’s time to meet your daughter.”

Jelena raised her head and found herself tucked into bed. “I must have fallen asleep,” she murmured. She struggled to sit up and Eikko came forward to adjust the pillows. Some time between the birth and now, she had been washed and dressed in a clean shift. A wad of absorbent padding had been tucked between her legs to catch the last of the birth fluids.

She felt weary to her bones, but the sight of the doctor, standing beside the bed, holding a blanket-wrapped bundle, caused all weariness to vanish in a flash. Eagerly, she held out her arms.

At the first sight of her child’s face, Jelena gave in to tears. She could already see Hatora had inherited all of her father’s beauty.

Oh, Ashi, I wish that you could see our daughter and hold her in your arms!

“It’s time to give your daughter her first feeding, Princess,” the doctor said. “Here, let me help you.” She pulled open the loose neck of Jelena’s shift. “Just lay her head against your breast…Very good…That’s it…let her take the nipple…”

Jelena marveled at the strength a healthy suckling newborn could exert on a breast. The sensation felt a little uncomfortable at first, but as she got used to it, a contented pleasure settled over her.

“Where is she? Where is my granddaughter!”

Sen’s booming voice preceded his arrival at the bedchamber door.

“Sen, she’s my granddaughter, too, you know!”

Jelena smiled at her father’s exasperated reply.

“Your Majesty, Lord Sakehera, please come in,” the doctor called out.

Keizo swept through the door, Sen hard on his heels. Eikko and Sateyuka immediately dropped into low bows. Sonoe remained sitting at Jelena’s side, one hand stroking the new mother’s hair. Amara stood and beckoned with a wave of her hand.

“Come and see your granddaughter, the two of you!” she said. As both men approached the bed, the blast of male energy rolling before them made Jelena dizzy. Keizo bent down and kissed his daughter’s forehead.

“Well done, my girl. Well done.” He gazed proudly at the nursing baby. “She’s an Onjara, no doubt about it. Just look her!”

“Hah!” Sen exclaimed. “She looks like a Sakehera, my
old
friend!”

“Both of you are arrogant fools; Hatora is barely out of her mother’s belly! She doesn’t look like much of anything, except a wrinkled little plum,” Amara scolded.

“The birth went well, your Majesty,” the doctor said.

“How are you feeling, Jelena my dear?” Sen asked, his face alight with joy.

“Tired, but happy,” Jelena answered. “I think Hatora’s going to look more like Ashi than me. At least I hope so.”

Sen blinked back tears. “Finding you was my son’s greatest fortune.”

“Two new grandchildren in the space of a month!” the king exclaimed. Misune had given birth to her son just four weeks previously. “You must be bursting with pride, eh, Sen?”

“Oh, yes,” Sen replied. “‘Course, my son Sadaiyo has been preening like a damn peacock! He has every right, though, ‘cause my grandson is perfect!”

“Enough, you men. Jelena needs her rest!” Amara chided. “You can come back later.”

Keizo laid a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Come along, old friend. I believe we’ve been dismissed. We’ll go back to my apartments and drink a toast.”

With much congratulatory back-slapping, Sen and the king departed.

“Hmmph…You’d think they were the ones who’d birthed this baby!” Amara sniffed, but her eyes brimmed with affection.