“They eloped, yes. But she tried to reconcile. My grandfather refused to take her phone calls or read her letters. When they came back unopened, she stopped trying.”
Steve studied the coffee in his cup. “There’s a price for running off.”
Alessi studied him a moment too long. He had sounded vindictive.
She said, “Mom was dyslexic. Everyone called her stupid, even my aunt Carrie, who was two years older. People made fun of her. Except my dad. He told her she was exactly what God wanted her to be.”
Probably not much discrepancy between her intellect and the pool boy’s. Steve caught himself. Why was he automatically disparaging a man he’d never met? Just because he’d won the heart of a woman and lured her away from her family?
“My mom was not stupid. She was brilliant, just not in testable ways.”
He nodded, half believing it. Maybe that was the oddness he noticed in Alessi. “How did you manage after your dad died?”
“Mom worked as many jobs as she could find. I worked with her.”
“Doing what?”
“Cleaning, mainly. Stocking shelves. Whatever she could do. There was not one day we didn’t eat three meals, even if it was from a single can.” She dropped her gaze. “I cry when I think of the times I complained.” To prove it, her eyes turned glassy.
But he’d seen great acting before. Thankfully, Moll brought their plates before he had to determine if Alessi was for real. The steamy pot roast looked fork tender and smelled rich and peppery, the way he liked it. Gravy smothered the mashed potatoes, car rots, and onions. “Moll …”
“I know. You’re speechless.”
“Again.”
She snorted, then left them.
Alessi said, “I guess now I’m invisible.” She picked up her fork. “This morning she thought I was contagious.”
“Moll’s just Moll.” Frankly, he found her abrasive personality refreshing after all his plastic, pious neighbors. Courtesy was one thing; Charity was taking its name a bit too seriously these days. Besides, Moll made him look good.
Steve nodded at the bite Alessi had scooped. “Aren’t you going to say your mom’s grace?”
“I think I’ll just be grateful for this food. It doesn’t need imagination.”
Steve took a bite. It needed nothing but a touch of salt. He reached for the shaker at the same time she did. They both pulled their hands back. He said, “Go ahead.”
She sprinkled the salt, then handed it to him. He touched her fingers when he took it. “Are you cold?”
“It’s just from the root beer.” She touched him with her other hand and it was warm. Too warm. Barb’s were perfectly manicured doll’s nails. It looked like Alessi bit hers. But maybe that was because her toiletries had been stolen.
“If I give you your pay today, you could go to Wal-Mart and get the things you need.” She could also skip town with the money.
“Where’s the Wal-Mart? I didn’t see one coming in.”
“No, it’s almost in Chambers City. About thirty miles outside of town.”
She scooped potatoes onto her fork. “I’m not sure I’m up for that hike.”
He’d forgotten her transportation situation. She’d have a hard time skipping town without a car, unless she’d stashed it somewhere until she had swindled all she could. He said, “I’ll drive you.”
“You will?” The bite stopped just outside her mouth.
“I’m not always a jerk.”
She did a fair job hiding her incredulity. All right, so he hadn’t shown his best side. She took the bite and dabbed with her napkin. “This is really good. Moll’s a great cook.”
“How about you? Do you cook?”
She sipped her root beer. “Well, I flip a mean burger. Fries too. But I haven’t had an actual kitchen—”
“No, of course not. You probably lived in your car, this mysterious, disappearing Mustang.”
She set down the root beer. “Is there a bathroom?”
He pointed toward the doors next to the counter. She stood up and walked away with the same stiffness he’d seen before. He’d hurt her again. What was it about her that made him strike with both fangs?
A
LESSI CLOSED HERSELF INTO THE STALL. It didn’t matter. People judged by what they saw or thought they saw. Steve must have serious abandonment issues if his mother left him before he was three and his fiancée left him for someone else. Of course he wouldn’t trust her. She just wished he wouldn’t call her a liar every time they talked.
Didn’t he see all she wanted was to get her car back and leave? A twinge stung inside. Was that what she wanted? Wasn’t she tired of roaming, trying to get by, trying to find someplace she belonged? That was the whole point of this trip, this pilgrimage. To find the place she was meant to be, to know she could stay.
She remembered the first time she’d been asked to leave. She wasn’t sure how old she was, but it wasn’t long after Daddy’s accident. Two men had come to the door and Mom let them in. They sat a long while in the small living room of their apartment; Mom cried. The men had looked very uncomfortable, but when they left, Mom told her they had to find a new home.
It had never been an apartment again. The cost of living was too high on the coast, but Mom was afraid to leave it. Alessi guessed now that she’d been hoping her family would look for her and she didn’t want to be far. So it had been motel rooms for them, up along the coast, and nothing like a Marriott.
Years later Alessi had learned that they lost their first place because Daddy had borrowed heavily for the boat and was underinsured. With that debt and no offsetting income from charters, Mom could not make the rent. Any time Alessi needed a doctor or something extra for school or the time someone ran into their car, they’d been set back so far they’d have to change motels. There was always a new adventure to go with it, but Alessi was tired of that life.
Yes, she’d spent some nights in her car. Not by choice, but things didn’t always happen the way you wanted. She wasn’t complaining, so why should he criticize? She’d had great hopes for Charity, but now she was living with strangers and begging a ride to Wal-Mart. Did he think she liked it that way?
She left the stall and washed her hands, immersing them in the warm water until she found the courage to return to the booth. She looked into the mirror. Mom might not have been Barbie, but she’d had the greatest smile.
Alessi mostly took after her dad, but she had her mom’s smile. She practiced until she could make it look real, then straightened. If Mom could smile through it all, she could too. She toweled her hands and went back to the table. Steve’s plate was nearly empty; hers was covered with a plastic lid.
He lifted it and set it aside. “I had Moll cover it so it wouldn’t get cold.”
He must have thought she’d fallen in. “I’ll just take it in a box.”
“I thought you were hungry enough to eat with Hannibal Lecter.”
She had been; he just couldn’t tell that he’d eaten her alive. “I’ve had enough, and you probably need to get back to the store.”
He didn’t argue, just commandeered a box and waited while she shoveled it in. It would make a great dinner, even cold. She stood. “I’d offer to pay Dutch, but I’d still be using your money.”
He smiled. “Some date I’d be.”
Date? She was definitely down on her luck.
He took the check and paid at the counter, handing Moll her tip directly. He was generous. Alessi appreciated that, though Moll seemed unimpressed.
Alessi smiled at Moll. “Sure was good.”
No answer.
She and Steve walked out together, but he didn’t hold her hand. She did not remind him. Two women waited outside the store when they got back, both within a decade of his age. He greeted them by name as he unlocked the door and motioned them in.
“How was your trip, Steve? Find anything wonderful?” The first woman was dark haired and plump with great dimples and very blue eyes.
“Some.”
“You’ll have to show us.” This from her friend, also plump but with the ruddy appearance of energy and spunk.
He flipped the sign around. “I don’t have much shelved yet. That’s what I’m working on. Alessi can help you find anything you need.”
She said, “Hello,” and steeled herself as they turned to her, but these two weren’t belligerent. If they were dismayed to be pawned off on her they didn’t show it.
“You’re new here.” The first woman’s blue eyes were startling against her black lashes.
“I’m just temporary. Until I get my car back.”
“Oh, so you’re the one whose car was lost.” The other woman put a hand to her arm. She was the first one today who hadn’t brushed off the mention of her car or changed the subject. Even so,
lost
didn’t exactly explain the situation. Alessi knew exactly where she’d left it.
She sighed. “I sure wish Sheriff Roehr would find it.” Then she could drive herself to the Wal-Mart. No, she wouldn’t need the Wal-Mart; she’d drive right out of town.
“And your purse gone and everything with it?” They were certainly well informed.
“Everything.” And she was sure that word meant more to her than to the woman.
“Oh, honey.” The ruddy woman pulled out a card. It read Diana Barnes, Cosmetology. “You just take this and if you need anything, give me a call. I’m just down the street at Hair Magic. At least some of the time.”
Alessi looked at the card again. “Diana. Are you Dave’s Diana?”
She laughed. “If he’d ever get off the stick.”
“So that’s how you know.”
Diana shook her head. “Everybody knows by now.”
“I’m Karen.” The other woman hugged her. “And what Diana said is true for me too. If there’s anything you need, you can find me at the church office.”
“The church?”
“Charity Chapel. It’s just a block and a half north of here. Can’t miss the big cross standing out front.”
Alessi slipped the card into her jeans pocket. “Is there anything I can help you with?”
Karen glanced over her shoulder, then whispered, “I just wanted to make sure Steve wasn’t spending Christmas alone.”
Alessi would not give her the line they’d fed Amanda Bier. “He’s dodging invitations.”
Karen clicked her tongue, shaking her head. “I know you can’t rush grief, and his father was the only family he had after …”
“He told me about his mom.”
The women shared a stare then turned it on her. “He did? He never talks about it, not even in Bible study when we’re all sharing our most painful moments.”
Alessi did not picture Steve in Bible study. She’d made the same judgments about him as he had about her. “He only said she left.”
Both women’s eyes fell. “Walter Bennet was salt of the earth. When she ran off with Randal Potts, he never said a word against her, just took his little boy under his arm and raised him all alone.”
Karen lowered her voice. “He didn’t contest the divorce papers, but he never signed them either. It passed the date and was a done deal with him never a willing partner.”
Diana nodded. “And he had plenty of chances to remarry but never did.”
No wonder Steve dreaded the pursuit of all the women in town. He’d already lived through it with his dad. Alessi said, “What Steve wants most right now is to be left alone.”
They shook their heads. “That will not happen. A good-looking man like Steve with his own business and a hint of tragedy is just too tempting. I’m surprised Amanda Bier hasn’t already snapped him up.”
“She tried.”
“And?”
Now she had to say it or make Steve a liar. “I’m … we’re spending Christmas together.”
“Well.” Diana squeezed her hand. “I am glad. Wait till Dave hears.”
Karen seemed a little deflated, but she smiled too. “I’m just glad he won’t be locked away somewhere. This will be his first Christmas without Walter, and they were so close.”
Alessi remembered the first Christmas at her aunt and uncle’s. She had cried inconsolably from sheer loss. They’d finally left her in her room and celebrated without her. It was the best of the Christmases she’d spent there.
“So you don’t really need a book?”
They looked at each other and laughed. Karen said, “We’ve got stacks of things still to read, but if he’s feeling assailed …” She looked around her.
“Here’s a nice one.” Alessi pulled a small collection of poems and prayers for the holidays from the shelf. “You could tuck it into a gift basket with a teacup or something.”
Karen’s dimples deepened. “We are definitely going to get along.”
Alessi caught her breath. A rush of warmth filled her as she caught the glow of the window garland behind Karen’s head. Karen reached for the book, and the glow was gone, but it had been there. Just like the halo on the sun. Maybe she wasn’t in the wrong place at all. Maybe a miracle just took some building up.
She hadn’t noticed how dim it had grown outside. The snow now fell like confetti on New Year’s Eve. Where would she be New Year’s Eve? “I’ll just ring you up.”
After they left, Steve came out of the storeroom with a full box of books. He slid it to the floor beside his desk and took his chair.
“Karen bought that poems and prayers collection.”
“Uh-huh.” He took off his screen saver and scrolled down the table that replaced it. “There it is. I knew I had one.”
“She thought this Christmas might be hard for you.”
“Not if I can fend off the vultures.” His fingers clicked on the keys.
The piranhas had taken to the air, it seemed. “She meant well.”
“She and Diana both, I’m sure. I just don’t need their coddling.”
Nor her platitudes. “Can I shelve some of those?”
He glanced at the box. “Sure. I have some orders here to deal with.” He was back to the screen already.
She reached into the box, realizing what he’d said before. His main business was not transacted through the front door. Her little sales might mean nothing at all to him. If he was selling books worth hundreds or even thousands of dollars to buyers all over the world, his whole little store was hardly more than a warehouse.
But she didn’t care. It felt good to make a sale, to match a product to a buyer. She had a knack for it. And she had to earn her paycheck somehow, though come to think of it, he had yet to write that check. She shelved all the books in the box, then took the feather duster and went over each row, except inside the locked cases.
The snow came down so hard she guessed they might not see another customer, not even one with hopes for snagging Steve. Whoever had her car better keep the top fastened down tight. And her tires, though new, were not snow tires. Steve came up behind her and took the duster.
Her shoulder bumped into his chest as she turned. “I was just finishing.”
“Let’s go get your things. The road’ll be impassable soon.”
She pulled on his jacket and followed him out the back door. His burgundy truck was lathered with snow. He let her into the passenger side, reached over and started the engine, then took the scraper and started on the windows. The snow was light as fluff, and he brushed it away quickly, all those little snowflakes flung from their resting places.
He climbed in and revved the engine, checking his temperature gauge. “We’ll have heat in a minute.”
“I’m okay.”
He half turned. “Do you ever complain?”
“It doesn’t do much good.”
He reached into his pocket. “Here.” He handed her a bundle of bills in a rubber band. “I put it in cash since you don’t have a bank account.”
That was thoughtful of him to consider. “Thanks.” She didn’t count the bills. Steve would have figured it exactly, and she didn’t want to look too eager, since he already thought she was trying to get something for nothing.
“I didn’t bother with FICA or any of that since it’s so temporary. You can be responsible for your taxes.”
She almost laughed. She’d never paid taxes in her life except the social security the government automatically withdrew. She never made enough to stand up and be counted.
The snow was thick on the road, but his heavy tires plowed through, leaving a double track. It looked as though the snow threw itself at them as they drove, but when she looked to the side, it fell straight. The heat quickly filled the cab.
“Warm?” He reached for the dial.
“Toasty.” His truck had a hint of butterscotch from empty wrappers in the console. Other than that, it was as tidy as his room.
The wipers fended off the flakes, but Steve had to strain to see the road. “We should have started out an hour ago.”
“If it’s too bad, don’t push it.”
“We’ll get through,” he said.
Long after all sign of Charity had disappeared behind them, she saw a lone parking lot with its lights each bearing a hazy halo. Had the sun gone down already? The sensors thought so.
Steve pulled into the lot and found a space close to the entrance. Alessi climbed out and shielded her face from the insistent snowflakes.
“Come on, beach girl. Don’t just stand there.” Steve caught her hand and hurried her inside. The warmth of his grip lingered long after he released it. “I’ll be in electronics. You can meet me there when you’re done.”
She nodded and headed for the health and beauty section. She chose the cheapest blow dryer she could find but got a decent shampoo. She added facial cleanser and moisturizer and lingered over the foundations and eye shadow. An argument of necessity couldn’t really be made there. She looked presentable without it, even with every freckle showing.