Happy Ever After (7 page)

‘Hi, is this Connie Adams?’ a woman’s voice asked.

‘Yes, that’s me. Who’s speaking?’ inquired Connie as she mentally cursed the owner of the massive SUV parked carelessly beside her, which was causing her great difficulty in seeing approaching traffic.

‘I’m Jessie Sheehy, Mrs Mansfield’s other part-time day nurse. You and I will be job-sharing, and I was just wondering if I could ask a big favour of you? I know you haven’t even started working here yet, but I was wondering if you could cover for me for a wedding in six weeks’ time? I know I’ve an awful cheek asking you when we haven’t even met.’

‘Not at all.’ Connie laughed. ‘Who knows – I might even need you to do the same for me some time. Are you working right now?’

‘Yes, I’m on duty at the moment. We’ve just been for a walk, and Mrs Mansfield is having a little rest.’

‘Look, how about I pop over for ten minutes and introduce myself. I just need to go home and store my groceries. I have some treats for Mrs Mansfield’s cat. I was telling her about them, they’re ones you get in Aldi, and my one goes mad for them. I told her I’d get her some. I’ve had them here for a week, so I could kill two birds with the one stone.’

‘That would be lovely,’ Jessie agreed. ‘I look forward to meeting you.’

‘Right, I should be over in about half an hour or so. See you then,’ Connie said, as she finally managed to squeeze out of the parking bay and head for home.

It would be good to meet her co-worker. And of course she’d oblige her for her day off. Connie might need the favour returned some time. Hopefully, she and this Jessie woman would have a good working relationship. She’d unpack the shopping, drive over to Mrs Mansfield’s and then go for a quick walk on the beach. She was dying for a breath of fresh sea air. She always felt so much better having done a walk.

It didn’t take her long to put away the shopping, and she slipped into a pair of jeans and a light pink and grey fleece. Even though it was a peachy evening, there was an easterly breeze blowing in off the sea and it would be nippy enough down on the beach.

She ran a brush through her short, layered auburn hair, noting the odd strand of grey. She was lucky, she reflected: her mother had gone grey in her thirties; she was in her late forties and still had her own colour. She didn’t look too bad, Connie decided as she applied some lipstick on to her full lips. She was beginning to get those pucker marks around her mouth, and the spiderweb of lines around her blue eyes was nothing to cheer about, but her skin was good and she looked healthy. The band of her jeans was a bit tight, and, she thought ruefully, her ass was sinking fast, and not all the walking in the world was going to change that. But she was tall and that helped, and walking on the stony beach was challenging to her calves and great for toning thighs. She was so lucky to have the beach ten minutes down the road. Life was good these days, she decided happily. It could only get better.

Lily Baxter sat on the bus on her way home from the hospital feeling quite perturbed. Judith had been in very bad form today, hardly even making the effort to chat. When Lily had asked her for the third time if she was in pain and did she need a nurse, her daughter had snapped, ‘No, Mother, I’m fine. Stop fussing.’

It had been just like she used to be in the bad old days in their relationship, and Lily had felt a spurt of temper and been tempted to retort, ‘There’s no need to be so rude, madam.’ But she’d refrained from making any comment, reminding herself that her daughter wasn’t that long from being near death.

‘Sorry, Ma. I didn’t mean it, just having a bad day,’ Judith had muttered when Lily had eventually packed away her knitting and stood up to leave, not wanting to get stuck in the tea-time rush hour.

‘That’s all right, Judith. I suppose it’s to be expected. I’m sure you’re fed up in this place anyway.’ Lily softened, and gave her daughter’s hand a little squeeze.

‘Thanks, Ma. And you know you don’t have to come in every single afternoon. Hospital visiting is tiring.’ Judith squinted against the sunlight, and Lily went over to the big plate-glass window and pulled down the blinds.

‘I know that,’ she said firmly. ‘But you’d do the same for me, so we’ll have no more of that talk. Now try and have a little rest for yourself. I know Cecily is coming in tonight before she goes to France for a month, so she told me, and your Aunt Annie and your cousin are coming over from Lucan. So you’ll
need
your strength for that.’ At least that had got a laugh out of Judith but, on her way out, Lily had gone to the nurses’ station and had told the staff nurse she was worried about her daughter. ‘She seems very down in the dumps, and I know she’s in pain,’ she explained.

‘It’s natural to get a bit depressed after a big trauma like that, and being in pain doesn’t help,’ the staff nurse said reassuringly. ‘We’re hoping to start her on physio and get her moving about a bit more, so that will help. Don’t worry – we’re keeping a good eye on her. These things take time to recover from.’

Lily had thanked her but, nevertheless, she was troubled and, as she sat on the bus heading back towards town, she came to a decision.

It was something that had to be done. She’d shilly-shallied long enough. She glanced at her watch. She just might make the bank in time. She should have made an appointment, she knew. Getting to see a bank manager was like getting to see a hospital consultant these days, she’d heard. But her manager, Francis Long, always made time to talk to her and never rushed her. He was a gentleman of the old school, not like some of the young whippersnappers who wouldn’t give an elderly person the time of day.

The bus whizzed along, leaving the traffic on her right crawling. These bus lanes were a gift, Lily approved, as she sat up ramrod straight, her hands gripping her handbag tightly on her lap, preparing in her mind what she would say to the bank manager.

She needed to have her wits about her, to make everything clear to him and to be clear herself about the consequences of her actions. Tom, her eldest child, would be furious with her if he knew what she was about to do, but bad scran to him, he’d left her in the lurch and never gone out of his way to help her. He’d left it all up to Judith, and now Judith was going to get what she deserved, Lily thought grimly as she stood up to get off at the next stop.

Her heart was beginning to race, and she could feel the familiar nervy flutters in her tummy. ‘St Michael give me courage, Holy Spirit guide me in what I’m about to do,’ Lily prayed fervently as the bus shuddered to a halt and she stepped out into the warm afternoon sun.

She could cross the busy main road and walk home, or she could take a deep breath and set in train a chain of events that would cause ructions in the family when it came to light.

‘
Do it
.’ Lily gave a start and looked around. She was sure she’d heard a voice, a voice like Ted’s, her beloved husband. But that was only fanciful imagining. Ted and Judith had been very close. A shaft of shame pierced her as a memory of long-forgotten jealousy surfaced. Yes, she admitted, she’d been jealous of their bond, jealous of their mutual interest in those Greek and Roman history books they used to read. Had that played a part in the way she’d treated her daughter when her husband had died? Had she, at some level, taken out her malice on her eldest daughter? Lily bowed her head as her lip trembled. It was hard recognizing your flaws, and she had more than most. She had been a bitter old woman and taken out all her anger and resentments about her failed life on Judith. It really was time to make amends.

Ted would want her to do it. She wanted to do it herself. She was being given another chance, a chance to give rather than take, as she had always done. This was St Francis showing her how, and she would not shirk from it even though she was very apprehensive. The safety net of her home would be gone. She might be at Judith’s mercy in the future, but she would have to trust her daughter. She would have to have faith that the good Lord would take care of her, she decided firmly, straightening her shoulders and gripping her handbag even more tightly. Ted was guiding her from the grave, she was sure of it. She wasn’t alone.

She made her way into the bank and stood at the information desk. A young bank clerk looked up and smiled at her. ‘Can I help you?’ She was so young and bright and alert, with all her life ahead of her, Lily thought with a little jolt, remembering how Judith had been like that once. Fresh-faced and bright-eyed and full of enthusiasm.

‘I was wondering if it was possible to see Mr Long for a little chat. I know I don’t have an appointment, but I’m a long-standing customer of his. Tell him it’s Mrs Lily Baxter who’s looking for him.’ It all came out in a rush, and she was annoyed with herself for her lack of composure and the way her knees felt shaky.

‘Certainly,’ the girl said, and lifted up the phone. She had a lovely Kerry accent, Lily noted, trying to keep her heart flutters at bay, almost tempted to hurry out of the bank.
Now, stop your nonsense, Lily
, she instructed herself sternly.

The clerk relayed the message and listened for a moment before hanging up. ‘He’s with a customer now but, if you don’t mind waiting a little while, he’ll see you when he’s finished. If you’d like to take a seat, I’ll let you know when he’s ready.’

‘Grand.’ Lily was utterly relieved that Mr Long would see her. Having taken the first step, she would have been terribly disappointed if the manager had been unavailable and she’d had to wait until after the weekend to see him. It would have preyed on her mind, and she might have lost her nerve. Lily sank gratefully on to the chair and took some deep breaths, willing her nerves to calm down. She should have taken one of her tranquillizers, but then she hadn’t known that she was going to take this step today. Perhaps it was just as well she hadn’t. Tranquillizers dulled your wits, and she needed her wits about her. Tom could get nasty and say that she wasn’t in control of her faculties and challenge her actions. Well, she’d be able to take an oath that she had been completely in control of her actions and had taken no medication, which might alter her state of mind. So he could take a running jump for himself. It was a terrible thing to have to admit that she did not like her own son, she thought sadly. It surely had to be a reflection of the way she had reared him. But he was a taker, and always had been. Always the one with an eye to the main chance; the what’s-in-it-for-me type.

She remembered Mrs Meadows, the woman she had shared her semi-private room with when she’d been in hospital getting her cataracts done. Mrs Meadows had been a revelation and an inspiration to Lily. Even though she was older than Lily, she lived alone and wouldn’t hear of going to live with any of her children. She had been completely and happily independent, enjoying her life and her family. And those boys had been good to her, Lily remembered. She’d listened to their affectionate teasing of their mother and heard the laughter and chat between them and compared their rapport with her own taut, tense relationship with all her children. She’d never had fun with her children, and now it was too late. Tom and Cecily didn’t want her in their lives. They had their own family units and were doing well for themselves. But if it was too late to change things with them, it wasn’t too late to change things with Judith and she had to take some small comfort from that.

Maybe when her time came, the Lord would look kindly upon her that she had tried in some small way to make amends for being a very poor mother. Her lip trembled. She hadn’t meant to be a poor mother; she’d just been frightened and nervy, content to let Ted take care of everything. She had wasted her life giving into her nerves. There was nothing she could do about that now; regrets got you nowhere, and it would be self-indulgent to slip back into miserable self-pity. She might have wasted her life up until now, but she wouldn’t waste what was left of it, Lily determined, as Mr Long walked over to where she sat and greeted her with a smile and an outstretched hand.

‘Mrs Baxter, how are you? Good, I hope. And what can we do for you today?’

‘Well, it’s not really what you can do for me, it’s about what we can do for my Judith,’ explained Lily earnestly as he led her into his office and closed the door behind him.

She’d been a bitch to her mother today, Judith reflected as the nurse took her temperature, pulse and respiration and then handed her a little cup containing her painkillers and anti-inflammatory tablets. She put them in her mouth, took a gulp of water and swallowed them greedily, looking forward to the dreamy lethargy they would bring, taking the edge off the pain and giving her some small relief. It was easy to see how you could become addicted to drugs, she reflected. She lived for her painkillers now, and took everything she was offered, including sleeping tablets at night, in an effort to numb both her pain and her despair.

‘We’ll be giving you another scan tomorrow, Judith, and a cholesterol test, so you’ll be fasting from midnight for that. We might as well check everything out while you’re here.’ The nurse took the cup from her. ‘And we’re going to start you on light physio, which will help with the pain. Especially with that trapped nerve in your neck.’

‘Busy day so.’ Judith felt some response was required. She liked this nurse, a kind Filipino woman called Lourdes, but today she didn’t seem to have the energy to talk to anyone.

‘You’re a bit down, your mum was saying. That’s normal after a traumatic event. Emotions seesaw, so don’t worry if you’re up one day and down the next. Why don’t you try and have a little nap before tea comes?’

‘Thanks, I will,’ Judith agreed. Sleep was precious, and she took it when she could. Lourdes plumped up her pillows and straightened her blankets, and Judith began to relax. It was nice being taken care of for a change. And if it weren’t for the pain, she wouldn’t mind being in the hospital. For the first time in her adult life she felt no sense of responsibility, no pressure to be in charge, no pressure to take care of anyone. Now, she was the one being taken care of, and all her worldly concerns and worries had floated away beyond the plate-glass window where they couldn’t reach her. She knew she would have plenty of problems to deal with when she left hospital. All the insurance stuff with the car, having to buy a new one and all that entailed. Having to sort her sick pay with work. But, for now, she could snuggle up in her bed and drift off into drugged sleep and forget everything.