Hard to Serve: A Hard Ink Novella (17 page)

He started unbuttoning the navy blue shirt he wore, his eyes locked on hers. “I realized I was letting fear hold me back, Mia. My parents’ marriage didn’t survive my father being a cop. Neither did my grandparents’. And these past months, I’ve been terrified that I was going to lose my job. At first, it wasn’t because of the investigation. I got shot. That’s what all the scars on my shoulder are from, and it caused nerve damage in the joint that reduced my long-distance shooting accuracy. I’ve been pushing myself through physical therapy, and it’s getting better, but if I can’t beat this, I’m done. And that was
before
the investigation hit.” He shrugged off the shirt, and she swallowed hard. His body was so gorgeous, masculine and rugged and raw. Unconsciously, she leaned forward, as if they were magnets that couldn’t help but attract.

Her gaze settled on the scars on his shoulder. Getting shot is what led to his needing surgery? Fear shivered through her, a fear she’d carried her whole life because of what her father did. Mia hated to hear about Kyler getting shot, being injured, suffering. She knew enough to know that these were things she’d always have to worry about, being with him. But would she really run from perfection just because later there might be pain?

He tossed his shirt aside and reached to remove a bandage from his ribs.

“Oh, God. Are you hurt?” She slid off the couch, coming down to her knees in front of him.

“No. Not hurt at all.” Removing the bandage was a slow process, and she flinched every time he sucked in a breath. And then it was off.

Mia gasped.

“Kyler. That’s…that’s like my piece.” One of the ones she’d showed him on her phone that night. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at a large tattoo that ran down the side of his ribs under his left arm. The original painting included a mix of oil paints, clock and watch parts, tiny glass beads, photographs of eyes, and metal numbers she’d handmade from scraps. Called “Time,” the work was one of her favorites, with the words “The Time is Now” set amidst a chaotic field of time pieces and watching eyes. What was on his ribs wasn’t identical, but the inspiration was clear. Her gaze ran over the words, the different sized clocks, some of them in pieces, the numbers. The tattoo artist had done the original work’s background colors—varying shades of reds, rusts, dark browns, and creams—in a soft watercolor style that worked perfectly on skin.

“I tried to remember it. To include as many of the details as I could. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since you showed it to me at dinner that night. I haven’t been able to escape the feeling that I was
supposed
to see your art, Mia.” He met her gaze, and there was an uncertainty there, like he thought she might be mad.

But she’d never been more honored in her life. He’d put her art on his skin. Permanently. And talked about how it moved him, changed him. What artist didn’t want her work to impact someone that way?

“The tattoo artist did an amazing job,” she whispered, absolutely awed.

“Jeremy. He loved doing this. And would love to meet you and see your work sometime. If you wanted.”

Mia reached to touch Kyler, to trace her fingers over her work on his body, but then she noticed the puffy red around the edges of the ink. She drew back.

“Touch me,” he said, grasping her hand and pressing it to the new tattoo.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she said.

“You couldn’t, Mia. Not by touching me. You make me feel alive. With every touch. Every smile. Every laugh.” His voice was full of gravel and emotion.

“Kyler...” Her words trailed off. She could hardly tell a man who’d just inked a part of her into his very skin that he didn’t know what he wanted. Because talk about a commitment. “I don’t know what to say.”

He took both of her hands in his. “I don’t just want you for a scene, Mia. And I don’t just want you in here, at Blasphemy. I want you in my bed, at my house, in my life. Come home with me. Tonight. Now.”

Mia’s heart thundered and her pulse beat against her skin. But now she was the one who fear was getting the better of. Because she wanted this—wanted him—so badly. “I’m scared you’re going to change your mind.”

He came closer, so close that their faces touched. “I won’t. My heart won’t let me. Because for the first time in my life, I’ve fallen in love. I’ve fallen in love, Mia, with you.”

Chapter 13

“You…you love me?” Mia said, her eyes glassy. “I…I…” She shook her head. “I’d like to go home with you, Kyler. Can we please get out of here?”

Kyler had them off the floor in an instant. He took tight hold of her hand and guided her back through the club, not stopping for anything. Because it hadn’t escaped his notice that she hadn’t returned his words—and maybe she wouldn’t, or couldn’t, just yet. That was fair given everything he’d put her through. But it made him desperate to continue their conversation. It made him desperate to see her in his space. He needed Mia all to himself. Now.

The short car ride felt like a cross-country trip, but finally he was parking at the curb just down the street from his row house. He rounded the front of his Explorer and opened her door, helped her down, took her hand again. He couldn’t stop touching her.

Up at the front door, they paused while he inserted the key. He gently grasped her chin and looked at her. “Never brought anyone here before.”

Her eyes went wide. “No one?”

“You’re the first. In all kinds of ways.”

Mia’s expression went so, so soft. It gave him hope. Hope that if she wasn’t where he was now, she might be able to get there.

Kyler pushed open the door and gestured for her to go first. The living room was small and well lived in, with casual couches, a big TV, and a dog bed on which his old man of a dog laid. Brewster lifted his head and gave him his trademark expression that looked like he was smiling. “That’s Brewster. He’s nearly deaf.” With some effort, the Rottweiler got off the bed and came over to them, a lot of the black on his face heavily speckled with gray.

Mia crouched and held out her hand. “Well, aren’t you a handsome man?”

Brewster wasn’t usually a licker, but he gave her fingers a few swipes of his tongue. She grinned and stroked his head and ears.

“Oh, don’t get sucked in to petting his ears. Once you start, he won’t let you stop,” Kyler said.

As if on cue, the Rottie sat up tight against her legs and leaned into her so hard that he knocked her over. She laughed out loud as she tumbled into a sitting position on her butt, the big beast half in her lap.

“I’m sorry,” Kyler said, rushing to make Brewster get up. “Go on, buddy. You’re not helping me out here.”

Mia smirked. “He’s fine. I don’t mind. I grew up with dogs.” She grasped the dog’s big head in her hands and kissed his face. “I’ll pet you more later, okay?”

Brewster looked up at him with a face that said,
Can we keep her?

I’m working on it, buddy. I’m working on it.

“Would you like the nickel tour?” he asked, helping her up.

“Definitely,” she said. The place was only fifteen hundred square feet, with two bedrooms and a finished basement, but he showed her all of it, ending in his bedroom. “You have a nice place, Kyler. Thank you for sharing it with me.”

“Thank you for coming home with me,” he said, walking up to her and putting his hands on her hips. “I don’t expect anything from you tonight, Mia. I just want to be with you.”

She looked at him a long moment, and then she rested her hands on his chest and met his gaze. “I…Kyler—” She sighed, like she couldn’t find the words.

“You can say anything to me. What is it?” He stroked one hand through her hair, so pretty and soft around her face, her shoulder.

“Say it again,” she said.

He frowned. “You can say anything to me?”

“No. What you said at the club. Say it again.” Her dark eyes burned.

Hope lit in his gut, then a little brighter. Could she mean…? “I’ve fallen in love with you?”

She nodded. “Yes, that.”

Elation roared through him, a wave that wanted to lift him up and up and up. Such an unusual feeling. For him. He cupped her face in his hands. “I’ve fallen in love with you, Mia. I’m in love with you. And I want you every way I can have you. For as long as you’ll have me.”

“Oh, Kyler. I...I love you, too.”

The words warmed parts of him he thought would always be ice cold. “Aw, Christ, thank you.” He wrapped her in a tight embrace, and when her arms came around his back, it nearly took him to his knees. He pulled away and cupped her face again, and then he sealed their words with a searing hot kiss. “Thank you,” he whispered around the edge of their kiss. “Thank you for not giving up on me.”

“Thank you for not giving up on yourself,” she said.

“Mia, I…I have something… Shit. I’m moving too fast, I know it.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. He’d never done this before, but he suddenly wanted it as much as he wanted his next breath. Maybe more.

She gave him an uncertain smile. “You can say anything to me, too, you know.”

“Yeah?” he said, really wanting to give her the gift he’d bought. Because he knew it would be perfect. On her. When she was ready.

She nodded. “Show me.”

His heart a freight train in his chest, Kyler opened the drawer on his nightstand and drew out a large square velvet jewelry box. “I’d love for you to wear this when you’re ready, but I don’t want to pressure you. I know we have a lot to figure out.”

With shaking hands, she took the box and eased it open. “Oh, my God. It’s so gorgeous.” She traced gentle fingertips over the wide, sleek Herringbone chain. In the center, the chain connected to a heart lock pendant with a large diamond in the middle next to the tiny keyhole. The key hung on a little hook in the middle of the box. She peered up at him. Need shined so brightly from her face.

“Would you be willing to wear my collar someday, Mia?” he asked, an answering need heating his blood.

“Someday?” she asked, her voice a little crestfallen.

He arched a brow. “Sooner?”

“Yes,” she said, hope bleeding back in.

He tilted his head and studied her for a long moment. “Now?”

“Yes, Sir. Please.” Her eyes were so wide and earnest that if he hadn’t loved her before, he would’ve fallen just then.

He hardened in an instant, for the first time in his life feeling his mind, body, and heart align with one need, one purpose. Claiming this woman. Forever. In any and every way. “Undress and present yourself, Mia.”

Staring into his eyes, she slowly unzipped her dress. That was all it took to bare her body to his gaze. She folded it, then placed it on the corner of his bed. Next, she removed her shoes. And then Mia knelt on the floor, knees wide, palms up on her thighs, back straight, head down. Beautiful.

Kyler pulled the necklace from the box and unlocked it. “I give this to you to wear tonight with the understanding that we need to discuss what it means to both of us, what the rules and expectations will be between us, and who we are going to be as a couple. Do you agree?”

“Yes, Sir,” she said, her voice reverent. And it slayed him, it really did. Because this meant as much to her as it did to him. Everything.

“But for tonight, I will just ask, will you be mine, Mia Breslin? Body, heart, and soul? Look at me.”

She did, and her eyes were bright with tears. “Yes, Sir. I promise. Body, heart, and soul.”

“And I promise, in return, that I will be just as fully yours. Will you wear my collar?” His body was strung tight in anticipation of seeing it on her.

“Yes, Sir. It would be an honor.”

He held it down in front of her mouth, and without him having to ask, Mia leaned forward and pressed her lips to the heart. The beauty of her submission nearly took him to his knees.

Kyler came behind her and draped the choker around her neck, and then he clicked it shut. He didn’t lock it, not tonight, because that was a layer of commitment he wanted to save for when they’d worked everything out. But knowing the chain was unlocked took absolutely nothing away from seeing her wear his collar. He turned the chain so that the diamond heart hung just below the hollow of her throat. Standing in front of her, emotion made his chest feel too small to contain his heart. How had he gotten so lucky? Because he never thought he’d shed his solitude, let alone find love. Love with an amazing woman who accepted him, mistakes and fuck-ups and all.

“Beautiful Mia,” he said. He took her hands and helped her rise. And then he got undressed too, until they were naked standing before one another. Naked except for her collar and the new bandage over his ribs, the parts of themselves they’d given to each other. “Sleep with me? I want you in my arms.”

They crawled into bed together, her back pressed to his front, their legs intertwined. His cock was hard and arousal flooded through him, but Kyler just wanted to hold her in this perfect moment of calm and peace and belonging.

He thought sleeping with someone else might be odd or hard to adjust to. But her warmth and her touch lulled him and relaxed him in a way he’d never before experienced. He just hoped to God this wasn’t all a dream. He just hoped that Mia was his. For keeps.

* * * *

Sunlight against her eyelids woke Mia slowly, but the moment the fog of sleep lifted from her brain, she gasped.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Kyler said, leaning up on an elbow behind her, his fingers stroking over her collar. “I’ve got you.”

“Did last night really happen?” she asked, absolutely awed at how Kyler had put himself out there, at the words he’d given her, at the cool weight of his collar around her neck. Last night had given her some of the best moments of her entire life.

“It did.” He kissed her shoulder. Her neck. Her ear. His kisses awakened other parts of her body, too. “You still own me completely.”

“God, Kyler. I feel the same way.” She looked up at him, and he claimed her mouth. His hand held her face, his cock swelling against her ass. She ground back against him, need flooding her body.

He rocked against her. “Do you need me, baby?” His hand stroked down her body and pushed her top thigh back over his legs, opening her core to his touch. “Do you need me the way I need you?”