Authors: EMILIE ROSE
He coughed and winced. The words died on her tongue. How could she condemn and interrogate him when he was in pain and still hung over from anesthesia?
She couldn't. Her questions could wait until next week. “I can't believe how efficient they are.”
Adam's hard face relaxed slightly.
“They know...how I like...things done. You do, too. Well trained. Like you.” His struggle for breath between words made Madison uncomfortable. The hand tethered to the blood oxygen meter gingerly covered his rib.
“They definitely know your methods.”
“Dad, you need to rest.” Adam pulled out his wallet and offered Madison some folded money. “Take Mom down to the cafeteria.”
Appalled at the idea of one-on-one time with Helen, she tucked her hands behind her back. “I'm not hungry.”
He caught her left wrist, pressed the money into her palm and folded her fingers around it. His hands were warm, slightly rough, inarguably firm, but not hurtful. Her senses rioted.
“Please, Madison. She hasn't left his side all day, and she insists on staying here tonight. She needs a break. See that she takes it.”
When he put it that way, how could she refuse?
* * *
H
ELEN
LEANED
AGAINST
the wall by the nurses' station, staring into the black sludge they called coffee. If she had the energy she'd teach them how to make it correctly, but every nerve in her body was raw and each muscle was so exhausted from fear and worry she wanted to crumple to the floor and cry. But, of course, she wouldn't.
Desperately needing the caffeine and the sugar she'd liberally poured into the cup, she forced herself to sip the vile brew. She had to be strong for Danny. She couldn't lose him. He was her life, and she'd do anythingâeven tolerate the woman who'd killed her son and grandchildâif it helped him beat this cancer.
But enduring Madison's presence wasn't easy. Every time Helen looked at her former daughter-in-law the agony started anew. She remembered the conversation she'd had with Andrew when he'd confessed Madison was making him look bad at the office and the glint in his eyes a few months later when they'd announced the surprise pregnancy.
What had Andrew done? Had he taken her motherly advice the wrong way? And had the car accident been partly her fault?
No. Madison had been driving. Andrew's and little Daniel's deaths were Madison's fault. She had to believe that. She
had
to or she'd lose her mind.
How could Danny “forgive and move on” so easily? Madison had told the police officer that she and Andrew had been arguing at the time of the crash, and she'd admitted to taking her eyes off the road. If that didn't make her guilty, then what did?
But Danny refused to listen. It was as if he'd closed the door on Andrew the day they'd walked away from his lifeless body here at this hospital. He refused to talk about their loss and got mad at her if she tried to. If not for the fact that he kept their son's office exactly as Andrew had left it, she'd think Danny had forgotten Andrew had ever existed. But now she was beginning to suspect he'd kept the office waiting for Madison's return.
“When Madison comes home...” had become a hated chorus in their house. Danny yammered about her as if she was a saint who could do no wrong, the resurrection of all their hopes and dreams, one who would make their lives whole again. But their lives would never be the sameânot without Andrew. You'd think Danny would realize that. Madison had made her lack of appreciation for all they'd done for her clear at every turn.
“Mom.”
She straightened at the sound of Adam's voice and smoothed her expression as best she could before facing him. She didn't want him to worry and wouldn't let him know she clung to the cliff of her breaking point with splitting fingernails.
“Please show Madison where the cafeteria is located.”
She flinched, sloshing the swill in her cup. He wanted
her
to take care of his brother's killer? It seemed like betrayal that he, too, expected her to forget Madison's part in ruining their lives. “It's in the basement and easy to find. There are signs to mark the way,” she said to Adam, ignoring Madison, who stood behind him.
“I don't have time to look for her if she gets lost, Mom. Just make sure she gets there and gets back, and grab something for yourself while you're there. You haven't eaten today.”
She stared into her son's implacable face. What he asked wasn't fair. It wasn't right. But he could be as hardheaded as his father sometimes, and she couldn't afford to offend Adam. If anything happened to Danny, Adam was all she had left.
The panicked sensation began to swell again, making it difficult to draw a breath. She punched her anxiety like rising dough, then dropped the almost full cup into the trash can and headed for the elevators. Madison fell into step beside her. Helen said nothing. Her grandmother had taught her that if she didn't have anything nice to say she shouldn't speak at all.
The wound Madison had inflicted was too deep to heal. Helen had never hated anyone in her life. The Bible said “forgive those who trespass against us,” and she had tried. But she was weak and she couldn't find it in her heart to forgive Madison
Monroe.
The crowded elevator saved her from having to make conversation. She wedged herself into the opposite corner. Once they reached the cafeteria, the smell of the food made her nauseous. Needing to escape but unable to bear the idea of going back upstairs and seeing Danny hooked to machines and looking like death, she pivoted toward a table by the window. All she needed was five minutes to regroup, then she'd return to her bedside vigil.
“Don't you want something?” Madison called.
“No.”
She stared at the fountain in the walled courtyard outside. Her life was a lot like the koi's. More often than not she felt as if she was swimming in circles and getting nowhere. Her existence had no purpose or meaning anymore. Preparing dinner for the boys used to be the highlight of her day. Then after Adam left it was only Andrew and Danny. Now Danny worked all the time. He seemed to prefer the office to their home and his animals' and his staff's company to hers.
She'd been excited when Adam moved back to Norcross, but he had little time for his mother. Come to think of it, his avoidance of home had started soon after Madison and Andrew had become involved. On the rare times he had come home during a school vacation Adam had spent almost no time at the house. He'd preferred going out with his friends to hanging out with his brotherâyet another reason to dislike the woman. She'd come between her sons, dissolving the closeness that only identical twins shared.
Helen closed her eyes, blocking out the voices around her. She tried to remember the good ol' days when she'd had all three Drake men sitting around her table. Three hungry males willing to try any recipe she served, and more often than not, she'd had a houseful of their friends, too. She'd been happy then.
What would she do if Danny didn't make it? The thought darted out of nowhere, catapulting her from her peaceful place.
Don't think that way.
But she couldn't help it. Other than lunches with the garden club every two months, Helen had nothing to entertain herself with except watching cooking shows on TV. When she experimented with new recipes, she usually ate them alone. Her labor-intensive meals had often turned into congealed messes by the time Danny got home.
Madison set a lidded cup and a handful of creamers and sweeteners in front of Helen, then lowered into the chair across from her. “I suspect the coffee here is slightly better than upstairs. It doesn't smell burned.”
“I didn't ask for that.” And she wouldn't drink it. She didn't want to be beholden to this woman for anything more than her help with Danny.
“I know. But Adam gave me money and asked me to get you to eat. I didn't know what you wanted.”
“I'm not hungry.” Helen scanned Madison's tray. A grilled chicken and spinach salad and a bottle of some kind of vitamin-fortified water. How could Madison eat at a time like this? If the surgeon hadn't gotten everything, Danny could die. Even now there could be nasty cells floating around in his body looking for healthy tissue to attack.
“Are you sure you don't want something?”
She battled another wave of fear. “No.”
Madison stabbed the salad with her fork and put some into her mouth. She chewed, but she looked as if she derived no pleasure from the food. It hadn't been that way when the two of them had shared the kitchen on weekends when Madison had come home from school. Bitterness welled inside Helen, burning the back of her throat like acid.
“Do you know what the first questions out of Danny's mouth were when he came out of anesthesia? âWhere's Madison? How's my practice?'” Helen couldn't keep the hostility and pain from her voice. She was no actress.
“Danny defines himself by his job. Most men do.”
“Danny is more than a veterinarian. He's a husband and a father first. There's more to life than his damned animals.”
She bit her tongue. She never swore. It wasn't ladylike. Her grandmother had raised her better. But to hear Madison defending Danny got on her last nerve. From what Andrew had said before he'd...passed, Madison was like Danny. Career obsessed and uninterested in mothering their child.
If Helen's fears were true and Andrew had done what she suspected he might have done, how angry would a career-driven woman be at having her plans derailed? Angry enough to wreck a car on purpose? Angry enough to cause an injury that might hurt the unborn child he claimed she hadn't wanted?
“I know he's more than a vet, Helen, but there are so many animals in need of help that sometimes when you get home you have nothing left to give.” Surprise then regret filled Madison's eyes. She ducked her head as if she regretted her confession.
“Not in your tiny practice.”
Not nice, Helen.
Shamed by her rudeness, she hid her face by drinking some of the coffee. It was better than the tar upstairs, but it could use improvement. And Adam had paid for it, so she wouldn't owe Madison anything if she drank it. She opened the lid and added cream and sugar.
“My practice may be small, but because it's in a rural area it's a dumping ground for abused or unwanted animals. It keeps me busy.”
“Euthanizing the strays?”
“No.” Madison sounded genuinely shocked by the question. She stirred her salad. “I should. But I can't unless there's no chance for quality of life. My farm's full of them. I try to find homes for each one, but not every animal is adoptable.”
Helen had always wanted a dog or cat, at first for the boys, then for herself when she discovered she couldn't have more children, but Danny said he got slobbered on by animals all day. He didn't want to have to deal with them when he came home.
After Madison's family had been killed, Andrew had called her “his little stray,” and Helen had adopted her like the daughter or pet she never had. But Madison had bitten the hand that fed her, so to speak. Helen owed her no loyalty, especially if she'dâ
No, don't think that.
Surely a woman who couldn't euthanize every stray that crossed her path wouldn't deliberately wreck her car because she hadn't gotten her way. Or would she?
Madison's golden-brown eyes met hers. There was a hard glint to them that had not been there before Andrew's passing. “How long has Danny been spying on me?”
Affronted, Helen stiffened. “He is not spying. He's interested in your welfare. He invested a lot of time in you.”
“Yes, he did. And that's why I'm here.” Madison pushed the green leaves around in her bowl again. “He doesn't really believe I'll abandon my practice and move back to Norcross, does he?”
Helen wished she could say no with certainty, but since his diagnosis, his comments suggesting otherwise had become so frequent she couldn't ignore them. She gulped more coffee, trying to wash down her worry.
What if Madison returned and Danny and Adam discovered Helen's part in the unwanted pregnancy? She'd lose their respect. She might even lose her husband and son.
“We both know you're not going to come back.”
“No. I'm not. How long do you think it will be before your house is livable?”
“Danny insists on doing all the work, so not until he's healed enough to do it. Why?”
“I'd prefer not to inconvenience Adam.”
“Isn't his house nice enough? Danny says your farmhouse is nothing impressive.” The ugly words jumped from her mouth before she could stop them.
Madison flinched. “I'd prefer a hotel.”
“I'll talk to Danny and see if we can get you a room, but don't get your hopes up. He's not sure he can trust you to keep your promise.”
Madison laid down her fork and snapped the lid onto her half-eaten meal. “I'm well aware that none of you trust me, Helen. But unlike some people, I keep my promises.”
Helen caught a glimpse of regret before Madison bolted to her feet. Trepidation trickled through her. “What are you implying?”
“Nothing. I'm just tired. We'd better get upstairs.” And then she walked away.
What had Madison meant? She'd never been one to make unkind remarks. Or had she hidden her true nature well? Did she know about that mother-son conversation? Was she confirming that Andrew had done something he shouldn't have?
Digging for answers was like picking at a scab. It hurt. It made Helen's heart bleed. And she wasn't sure how much more grief she could handle. Best to let sleeping dogs lie before she learned something she couldn't live with.
CHAPTER FIVE
S
HAKING
HIS
ARMS
to ease the burn in his muscles, Adam walked away from the weight bench. One more set and maybe he could sleep. Working out this close to bedtime wasn't a good idea, but he was too wound up to lie on his back and stare at the shadows dancing across the ceiling, as he'd done last night.
A flash of movement outside caught his attention. He stepped closer to the window. Madison paced the screened porch on the opposite end of the house in the dark. The moonlight reflected off her white clothing.
It was almost eleven o'clockâtoo late for her to be up, considering she'd barely stayed awake during the car ride home from the hospital. Or had she been faking it when she'd had her head back against the headrest and her eyes closed?
He grabbed his towel, wiped the sweat from his face and headed down the hall to find out what was wrong.
In the den he simultaneously flipped on the light and thrust open the door, then stepped outside. Madison spun to face him. The cool night air chilling the sweat on his skin had beaded her nipples beneath her thin T-shirt. His heart thumped hard against his ribs. He yanked his gaze back to her face. “What are you doing out here?”
“Unwinding.”
Every muscle in her long, bare legs was as tense as a bowstring, belying her answer. She bit her lip and folded her arms. The move hiked up the bottom of her shirt a few inches, revealing the hem of her shiny running shorts. At least she wasn't naked beneath the shirt. Her toes curled on the deck, and lust kicked him square in the gut. He punted it right back. There was nothing sexy about bare feet and unpainted toenails.
“You should be in bed. Tomorrow will be as busy as today.”
“I'm not tired yet.”
The shadows beneath her eyes told a different story. “You can't sleep out here, Madison. There's a perfectly good bed inside.”
“I'm fine. Don't let me keep you fromâ” Her gaze traveled across his bare chest, then down to the waistband of his gym shortsâhis only piece of clothing. His blood chased south right behind it. “Whatever you were doing.”
Damn it. He would not get a boner in front of her. He crushed the towel in his fist and willed the response away, but that didn't stop him from rising to half-mast.
He caught a glimpse of her expanded pupils before she turned away. His skin warmed.
“Go to bed, Madison.” Self-directed anger added gravel to his tone.
“There's no point in going until I can sleep,” she replied without turning away from the moonlight-streaked pond.
And then it hit him. “You're avoiding the bedroom.”
Her gasp and quick pivot confirmed his guess.
“I live with the reminder that Andrew is dead every time I look in the mirror at the face we shared. But
you
can't even handle sleeping with his old trophies.” He shouldn't take pleasure in that, but he did. Petty of him.
“That's absurd. They're only inanimate objects.”
He could see her false bravado in the hiking of her chin. The pinking of her cheeks contrasted with the white line of tension outlining her lips. “If you're not at the top of your game tomorrow, the staff will have to work harder to cover for you.”
If her spine stiffened any more it would snap. “I never give less than one hundred percent at work.”
She stalked back into the house and not a moment too soon. He'd never looked at Madison in any way other than as Andrew's girl. And come hell or high water, he wasn't going to change that now.
But despite her insistence that nothing was wrong, something seemed off, and he couldn't have her falling down on the job.
He followed her, but first detoured by the laundry room to don a T-shirt. No need to court trouble, and the way she'd looked at him could cause nothing but mayhem. He needed to call Ann, his longtime friend with benefits. A few uncomplicated hours with her and this unwanted awareness of Madison would not be an issue.
He found Madison in the hall outside the bedroom with her hand inches from the doorknob. Her fingers curled, relaxed then curled again, but she made no attempt to grasp the knob.
His conscience pricked him. Was she still mourning his brother? If so, putting her in that room was cruel. But no, Andrew had insisted Madison cared for nothing and no one besides her jobânot even the baby she'd conceived. And thus far Adam had seen no evidence to the contrary.
“There's another guest room if you can't handle that one.”
She lowered her hand and slowly turned. Her eyes locked on his face. “You don't think much of me, do you, Adam?”
“My opinion doesn't matter. Twenty-four more hours and you'll be at home and not my problem until next week.”
“Twenty-
four?
”
“I'll fly you home after you visit the hospital tomorrow night.”
Her eyes widened in obvious dismay. “Why do I have to go back?”
Selfish.
“Because my dad needs to know he hasn't misplaced his faith in you even though I'm certain he has. You
will
let him down. It's just a matter of when.”
“You're wrong, and I'm tired of you and your mother throwing that in my face. But only time will prove that
I
abide by my word.” She entered the room and firmly closed the door.
Something about the way she'd stressed
I
hinted at deeper meaning. But he didn't have time to worry about that tonight. His chauffeur duties were cutting into his work time. That meant he had to be on his game and doubly effective when he was on the job. He needed sleep. And he would not let concerns about Madison rob that from him. She'd already taken too much.
* * *
T
HANKFUL
FOR
THE
lunch break, Madison retreated to her office, sank into her well-worn chair and propped her elbows on her scarred desk. She dropped her head into her hands. The morning had been stupendously long.
It was good to be home, but she was beginning to wonder if she had PTSD from her trip to Georgia. Being back in Drake territory had been like walking barefoot across the kitchen floor after she'd dropped and shattered a glass. She never knew when she'd get stabbed by another shard of memory, or worse yet, a splinter of attraction for Andrew's clone.
Her second visit with Danny had been every bit as touchy as her first. It couldn't be clearer that neither Adam nor Helen wanted her there, and tolerated her only out of necessity. Danny, on the other hand, hung on to her every word, making her feel doubly guilty that she was counting the days until she could leave Norcross and the Drakes behind for the last time.
Seven more weeks to go. How would she survive?
Had she been jumpy this morning? Yes. Distracted? Affirmative. A little short with the clients who'd grilled her about her absence? Absolutely. She'd caught Piper looking at her strangely several times, but thankfully, her assistant had not asked questions. She wished she could say the same about her clients. If the afternoon went like the morning, Madison would be lucky not to offend anyone.
“Lunchtime!”
At Piper's cry Madison lifted her head. Her assistant and June, her tenant, stood side by side in the doorway. Their up-to-something expressions did not bode well for Madison's downtime.
“What's up, ladies?” She hated to ask.
“It's time for chicken-salad sandwiches,” Piper said.
“It's Wednesday.”
“You weren't here on Monday.”
Their chicken-salad-at-Madison's-on-Mondays habit was practically sacred. When June wasn't on duty or could carve a few minutes out of her schedule she joined them. “Sorry, but I haven't prepared the chicken salad.”
Piper pulled a plastic container from behind her back. “Lucky for us, I begged a recipe from one of the church ladies. It's not as good as your grandmother's recipe, but it'll do.”
“And I made brownies.” June displayed another container. She opened the resealable plastic top, stepped forward and waved the dessert beneath Madison's nose. The scent of chocolate filled the air. Madison's mouth watered. “Nothing fixes stress like chocolate.”
The deputy could bake. Madison had not bothered to learnâwhat was the point when it was just her? Homemade sweets were a treat. “Who said I'm stressed?”
Piper and June exchanged a hiked-eyebrow look.
“Why, bless your heart, dear,” June drawled in a syrupy fake Southern accent that sounded remarkably like Madison's nosiest clientâone who'd grilled her within an inch of her life an hour ago. “Just eat one of these. You'll feel better.”
“I'm fine. But I will take one of your better-than-sex double-chocolate walnut brownies.” She reached for a treat and took a big bite. The gooey, fudgy flavor filled her mouth. Heaven.
Piper shook her head. “Nothing is better than sex if you're doing it right.”
June jabbed Piper with an elbow and stuck out her tongue. “Not all of us are having newlywed sex. Quit rubbing it in.”
Piper blushed and Madison smiled. Piper had recently managed to reunite with her old flame and her son's father. If Madison weren't so happy for Piper she'd be envious.
June's gaze swung to Madison. “I'm surprised you're not singing the same satisfied song after spending two nights with your sex-on-a-stick brother-in-law.”
The brownie turned to mud in her mouth. Madison gulped. One of the walnuts raked down her throat like a jagged rock.
Piper perked up. “He's attractive?”
“Hot.” June touched the air and hissed a sizzling sound.
“He's my brother-in-law.”
“You're the one who said your husband died a long time ago. That makes Mr. Tight-Buns-and-Broad-Shoulders fair game. The man has swagger down to an art. I would love to frisk him. I might even use my handcuffs. Unless you want to?” She waggled her eyebrows at Madison, her eyes sparking with mischief.
Madison considered hiding behind her desk. “I'll pass.”
“I see Madison's point. He
is
family,” Piper agreed as she doled out paper plates. “But June's right, too, Madison. Your marriage ended years ago. If this guy trips your triggerâ”
“He doesn't.”
Something
was tripping her trigger, but it wasn't Adam. It was hormones. And memories of a time in her life when she'd thought everything perfect.
June pulled up a chair and piled a sandwich and two brownies on Madison's plate. “Family is not just genetics. It's who you make it. You two are my family because I say so. And Hot Stuff has been out of your life for how long?”
“Six years, butâ”
“So he's no longer related. He took himself out of that equation when he didn't contact you until he needed a favor. And as I might have mentioned, he's H. O. T. Hot.”
So maybe Adam was attractive. She had to admit that though Andrew had been a devoted runner and in excellent shape, he had never lifted weights. Adam obviously did. His solid, well-defined and well-placed muscle was proof of that. Adam's pectorals with their tiny hard nipples, his biceps with their cording of thick veins and his washboard abs were a call to every dormant feminine atom in her bodyâa call she intended to ignore.
“You two are killing my appetite. But before you get too caught up in your fantasy, you need to know Adam and Andrew were identical twins.”
“Ooh,” the women chorused simultaneously.
The deputy shrugged. “That makes it tricky, but not illegal. He's still far better looking than anything you'll find around here, and his expensive clothing tells me he's successful at whatever he does. I wouldn't discard him too quicklyâunless you're throwing him my way.”
“He's an out-of-towner, June, and we all know you swore you'd never relocate again for a man.”
“True. Burned once and all that. But you should take a good, long look at him. He's delicious.”
“You are delusional, Deputy Jones, and strangely repetitive today. My practice and my home are
here,
and the Drakes are a complication I don't need. No, thanks.”
They turned their attention to the food, but Piper and June's inquisitive gazes never strayed far from Madison. When she could stall no longer, Madison took her last bite and pushed her empty plate aside, then leaned back in her chair and waited.
“Are you going to make us drag it out of you? You know I have professional experience with interrogation.” June said it with humor, but Madison saw the seriousness behind the smile.
“There's nothing to tell.”
“Bull. Your former in-laws haven't visited once in all the years I've known you, and yet you dropped everything and ran the moment Handsome snapped his fingers. I've never known you to do anything that impulsive unless it involved an animal in distress. You don't have to help them if it's going to keep you up all night.”
“What makes you think I'm not sleeping?”
“Because I saw your lights on in the house, then in the barn, and I heard you talking to Bojangles around 3:00 a.m.”
Madison winced. June had lost sleep watching out for her. “I'm sorry I kept you up.”
“Make it up to me by starting with, âI'm doing them this
huge
favor because...'” She waggled her fingers in a give-me-more gesture.
Madison poked at the crumbs on her plate, wishing she could ignore June's request. But June and Piper were picking up Madison's slack with the practice and the menagerie. They deserved to know at least part of her story.
“My family was killed by a tornado early in my junior year of college. The Drakes took me under their wing.” She ignored their sympathetic awws and plowed on. If she stopped now she'd never get out the sordid story. “Andrew proposed on my twenty-first birthday. We married a year later when I graduated from the university. I practically lived with Andrew's family during school breaks and vacations, and during vet school I worked with Dr. Drake every chance I had. Danny, my father-in-law, taught me more about treating animals than any of my vet school professors.