Heat (10 page)

   As soon as the doors open I storm out and push open our front door in frustration. I have a horrible feeling Paige and Ria are going to tell me something horrible so I need a drink. I grab my empty glass from the living room and go into the kitchen to refill it.

   We all stand in the kitchen, Roxie and I facing Paige and Ria. I take a much needed gulp from my glass and ask them about what they know. They seem to now know what all of this fucking craziness is about. Paige starts to answer and I'm scared at what she's going to say by the worried expression. "If I'm right, well then, erm..."

   "Just tell us!" I shout, I need to know now! Ria grabs her phone from her bag and taps away before holding it out to me to see. What I see on her phone is not what I expected at all. On Ria's phone is a professional looking photo of Cole and Mason and there are two other men with them. Cole is front and center looking his usual sexy self with Mason just behind his right shoulder. The other two men are just as good looking but they have nothing on Cole. Under the photo in large black bold writing it says
‘Black Inferno’
and underneath it explains exactly who Black Inferno are and how ridiculously successful they are. I'm speechless and I look up to Roxie to see she's staring wide eyed with her mouth hanging open in shock at the photo.

   "Is this the Cole and Mason you have been seeing?" We both silently nod and they exchange a glance. "Black Inferno was the rock band that we went to see a couple of months ago. They're a huge a rock band, known for being lady loving naughty boys."

   She giggles a little but I close my eyes and rub my hand over my forehead hard. "Are you telling me the men we have been seeing are really rock stars, who have lied to us for over two months?" They both nod and Roxie curses, I didn't mean to shout at them but I'm so fucking angry right now. I still can't wrap my head around it but it would explain why there is a screaming mob of girls outside and our photos are online. Someone obviously spotted them and then followed us, finding out where we live and probably think they're still up here. I quickly finish my glass of wine and refill it; Roxie pushes her glass forward so I fill hers too. Suddenly it dawns on me, that I have been having a sort-of relationship with a rock star and I didn't even know, I can't believe he fucking lied to me! Has the whole time we have spent together been a lie; am I nothing but a stupid game to him? What kind of man does that? I can't believe I have fallen in love with a man who hasn't spoken a word of truth to me since we met. Does he even like me? Ria said they are known for loving the women, I bet they have had a right good old laugh about Roxie and I.

   I pick up my glass and take it with me to my bedroom; I slam it down on my dresser not bothering to wipe up the spillage, I open my laptop and quickly bring up YouTube. I type
Black Inferno
with shaky fingers and I laugh at the amount of interviews and music videos that show up, it's not funny but what else can I do. I don't want to cry, even though I can feel my tears. An annoying habit of mine is that I cry when I'm pissed off and right now I am way beyond pissed off! I click on the first music video that I see and ironically it's about a lying cheating girlfriend. As I watch more videos I can't hold back my tears anymore, a mixture of anger and sadness overwhelms me. I feel my heart break a little, is he really coming back or was the goodbye he left me with for good? How could I have been so stupid to not know who he is? My lack of knowledge in rock music has well and truly kicked me in the ass.

Chapter Eighteen

Cole

   "Cheer the fuck up man." Tate elbows me in my ribs but all I manage is a frown. I'm in a bad mood because I hated leaving Lacey this morning. I could have held her against me for hours and smelt her hair, she always smells so good.

   I've text Lacey a couple of times already and talked to her. I can't help myself when it comes to her. But no matter how many texts I send it's nothing compared to actually being with her. I really wanted to finally tell her who I am while I spent the past three nights with her, but I could never find the right time. Well I could have made the time but I chickened out, yeah I know I'm a fucking pussy, but I just didn't want to upset her and for her to be angry with me. I might be able to get away for a night or two, to be with her in about two weeks time and I don't want her to be angry while I'm gone. I want to be able to focus and perform on stage, and look forward to her calls, texts and look at her pictures with lust without worry or regret. Fuck me I sound like a pussy but when it comes to Lacey I truly don't give a shit.

   "He looks just as miserable as you fucking do." Tate nods over to Mason sitting opposite us on the leather sofa and I agree. He's staring down at his phone and I can't help but feel guilty at what I've made my brother do. For the whole two months Mason has begged and begged me to finally tell Lacey about who we really are, but I just can't do it. He wants to let Roxie know, but he knows Roxie won't keep that secret from her best friend and really it should come from me and not Roxie. I hear Tate sigh loudly beside me, I know he's trying to start a conversation but I'm just not in the fucking mood to chat, so I grab my black headphones from the table, letting him know that I don't want to talk. When the loud and heavy bass of
Be Myself
by
Linkin Park
starts to play, I watch him get up and head in the direction of the back of the bus. I look up to Mason to find that he is staring back at me, his eyebrows drawn together in a scowl. He shakes his head at me and looks back down at his phone. I know he's angry at me and I feel like shit about it, but it's not my fault; I don't want to upset Lacey. If we had told the girls the truth, he was going to ask her to join us for the next month on tour. He would probably be sitting over there right now with her, but because I told him I wanted to wait a little while longer she's not here and neither is Lacey, I know that I probably would have asked her to join us on the tour too; of course, that is if she wasn't too angry with me for obviously keeping such a big secret for so long, I know that by confessing to her that I have lied for over two months it would most likely piss her off. God I would have loved to have spent a month straight with her, falling asleep and waking up with her in my arms, every day and every night. As much as I'd love to throw her over my shoulder and carry her onto the tour bus, I can't do that. I can't keep her on the bus captive, as much as I'd like to.

   I get up and crash on my bunk, close my curtain and shut my eyes. I lose myself in the loud music and screaming lyrics.

* * *

   I wake up to distant shouting, and then I feel a smack on my face. The music is still blasting in my ears but I don't care to listen to what song is playing because I rip the headphones right off my head. Mason is glaring at me while I'm lying on my bunk. "You fucking bastard!"

   I jump out from my bunk and face Mason, he’s just a step away from me otherwise our chests would be touching. I love my brother, but if he doesn't explain quickly why he just bitch slapped me while I was sleeping, I'll make him wish he hadn't. "Are you gonna explain?"

   I see Tate and Booker looking at us from the other side of the bus; they both look at Mason with a surprised look. Mason is almost red in the face with his fists clenched down at his sides and he looks pissed. "Look at your phone!"

   I frown and take my phone out of my pocket; the screen is blank apart from the background picture which is of Lacey and me. I look back up to Mason and he's looking intently at my phone like the answer to his madness is written on my phone. What has gotten him so angry anyway? Mason isn't usually an angry guy, that title goes to Booker, ever since his girlfriend of three years slept with their neighbour as we were touring. You can't really blame the guy for that! I look back at my phone, confused. "So what am I supposed to be looking at here?"

   He snatches my phone from my hand and frowns down at it, and then he throws it down on my bunk.
What the fuck is happening?
"Have you heard from Lacey?"

   Immediately my spine stiffens at Lacey's name. If anything has happened to her I don't know what I would do, if anybody harms even a hair on her head I won't hesitate to hurt them. "Has something happened?"

   Mason just snickers under his breath which pisses me off. "Yeah, something like that."

   I step closer to him so now that our bodies are touching and I lean my forehead against his. "You better get talking now!"

  Tate and Booker take a couple of steps towards us. Booker may be the angry member of the band but I'm known for loving a good fight, my fists and short fuse has given me quiet a reputation. Mason better be careful with his next words, brother or not. He cocks his head to the side. "Let’s just say that the secrets out now."

   His sly grin and words make me take a step back in shock. "What do you mean?"

   "I could tell you, or you could take a look online and see for yourself." What the fuck is her talking about? He's making no sense at all! This is all just pissing me off even more! I grab my phone from where Mason just threw it on my bed and dial Lacey's number but she doesn't answer. I try it again facing Mason's smug looking face and I get her voice mail.

   "What's going on?"

   Mason just shakes his head and laughs. I throw my phone back on my bed and growl out loud causing Tate to walk closer to Mason. "Maybe you should tell him what you know man."

   Mason chuckles.
Fucking chuckles!
"I told you that you should have told her! I wanted Roxie to know, but no! Cole Masse gets his own fucking way as usual and now because of you Roxie is pissed at me! All because of you! You're a fucking dick Cole!"

   "Why is she pissed at you?" I have a sickening feeling that I know exactly the reason why she is so angry with Mason.

   "They fucking know Cole! They know we lied to them for two months! There are people outside their home right now! Pictures of us online! Fuck! I knew I should have ignored you and told her anyway!"

   I sit down on the edge of my bed and hold my head in my hands. No wonder Lacey isn't answering her phone. "How do you know?"

   Mason loudly huffs. "Rox text me. She's pissed, but she's not as angry as Lace." I look up at him and frown. "Rox said she's been shouting, cried a little but now she's drinking, a lot. Look I told Rox I wanted to tell her, you made me wait longer and longer Cole. If you had told her the truth we wouldn't be in this mess right now. "

   I try and ring Lacey's number again begging her to answer but it cuts off. I decide to send a text instead.

   Me: Lace babe, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me
.
I'll beg if I have 2. I didn't want 2 damage what we had and I couldn't hurt U. Please talk 2 me baby, I really did want 2 tell U but I was just scared I would upset U! Everything else was true, I didn't lie about anything else I promise U. Please talk 2 me baby xxxx

   I quickly hit send and look up to Mason. "Look, I'm sorry Mase."

   He comes over and pats my shoulder; at least he doesn't seem as pissed at me anymore. "It's done now."

   He walks away; Tate and Booker following him. Ten minutes later Lacey hasn't text me back so I try her number, but I get her voice mail again. Then I get a text.

   Lacey: Leave me alone Cole, you're a fucking liar! I don't want anything 2 do with U! Go and fuck a groupie whore. That's what U rock starts do right? Bye Cole, have a good life. I know I will.

   Shit! I try again to ring her but she doesn't answer so I text her again.

   Me: I'm not going 2 leave U alone, U mean 2 much 2 me Lace. I don't want anyone but U, nobody even comes close 2 U baby, please xxxx

   I search my name on my phone and I see the pictures from the past three nights. Shit! Why did I fucking lie for so long? Mason was right and this is my entire fucking fault. I want to put my headphones back on and drown my thoughts out with music, but words flash in my mind. When I get the urge to write I never ignore it, you never know when you have a hit on your hands. So I run into the main area at the front of the bus where the leather sofas and kitchen area is, I get my lyric book out and begin to write. I don't stop for three hours. I still don't hear anything back from Lacey.