Hell to Heaven (51 page)

‘Time,’ Greg said. ‘Which is something you guys don’t have. You need to go down to the palace; the other sons will be there providing protection from the radiation. I have to do this now, and it’ll be hot.’

‘Can you take me, Simone?’ I said.

‘As far as the palace, sure,’ she said. ‘After that I’ll need a break before I can take you home.’

‘That’s fine,’ I said.

She put her hand on my head and we were in the gardens of the palace, next to a stream flowing through a series of stepped channels.

‘Look away from the mountains,’ Simone said, and covered my eyes just as a blinding flash filled the air. There was nothing for ten seconds, then the ground shook beneath us with a shockwave that felt like it lifted us and dropped us again.

‘Two in one day; we’re doing well,’ Simone said. ‘At least this one didn’t knock us out.’

‘Are you all right?’ my mother said, clutching both of us when we arrived at their villa. ‘I heard there was a
fight, some demons—something happened. And there was a huge explosion—someone just blew up the ski resort.’

‘We’re okay, just kinda exhausted,’ Simone said. ‘Do you mind if I use your shower?’

‘I’ll get Jen to bring you something to wear,’ my mother said. ‘All your clothes are scorched, sweetheart—what happened?’

‘I’d prefer not to go into it,’ Simone said, and headed for the bathroom.

‘Will she eat something when she comes out?’ my father said.

‘It would probably be a good idea,’ I said. ‘Some tea too. I think it’s shock.’

‘You have to wonder how all of this builds up in her,’ my mother said as she checked the fridge. ‘I don’t have anything, we’ll send out.’ She turned to me and leaned on the fridge. ‘It has to have an effect on her after a while, Emma. All she does is fight.’

‘Yeah, hamburger,’ my father said into the phone. ‘It’s for Princess Simone. Yes, thick-cut. Extra aioli. Strawberry.’ He put the phone down. ‘I wish you’d eat something too, Emma.’

Louise tapped on the door, then opened it and poked her head through to talk to me. ‘Come out here into the garden.’

‘What for?’ I said suspiciously.

‘Just come on out. I have something for you. Where’s Simone?’

‘Having a shower.’

‘Hey, that’s a good question,’ she said. ‘When you’re snake, do you still take baths and stuff?’

‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘I can’t tolerate soap or chlorine, and if I bathe too much I get a horrible scale rot—God,
that’s a bitch to get rid of. But I like lying in warm water now and then.’

‘Sounds more like swimming than washing,’ she said.

‘Well, I’m not a greasy, stinky, fur-covered mammal,’ I said, ‘all matted and oily and covered in shit. I never really get that dirty.’ I raised my head. ‘Damn, where did that come from?’

‘You sound like Daddy again; he used to be rude about mammals sometimes,’ Simone said. She pulled the fluffy bathrobe she was wearing tighter around her. ‘Could you stop doing that?’ She leaned against the wall and her voice broke. ‘Just…stop it?’

My mother ran to her and bundled her into a huge hug. She led her to sit on the couch and held her, letting her cry.

‘I’m sorry, Nanna,’ Simone said into my mother’s shoulder.

‘That’s what nannas are for, sweetheart,’ my mother said, rocking Simone. ‘Let it out.’

I went to Simone and curled up next to her. She pulled me in and held me as my mother rocked her.

‘Come out to the garden,’ Louise said to me. ‘I’ve been wanting to see if this will work.’

‘Go away,’ I said. ‘We’re having a family crisis.’

There was the sound of frantic flapping outside. ‘Shit!’ Louise said. ‘It nearly got away. Come on, Emma, it’s a present for you.’

‘What do you have there?’ I said.

‘Come and see.’

‘Just tell me.’

‘No, come and have a look.’

I pushed the door open with my snout to see what she was talking about. Louise stood in my parents’ tiny
garden holding a live, flapping chicken upside down by its legs.

She held it out to me. ‘Takeaway.’

‘Thank you. Take it away,’ I said.

‘Come on, I want to see you eating. Do it for me.’

I turned away. ‘No.’

‘Whoops!’ she said, and I turned back. She’d dropped the chicken and it ran away from her. It ran. It moved. It ran away.

I pursued it with relish, moving faster than it did and pinning it in a corner of the garden against the high wall. It stared at me with its mindless eyes and I lunged towards it, grabbed it in my mouth and wrapped my coils around it. I squeezed it, enjoying the feeling of its struggles becoming weaker. When it stopped moving, I released my coils and started to eat it whole, using my throat to crush it as I swallowed. I wiggled my mouth from side to side, pushing it further in, relishing the sensation of feathers filling my mouth and juices running down my throat.

‘What does it taste like?’ Louise said, wide-eyed and fascinated.

‘Just blood,’ I said. ‘It’s the textures that are the fun part. That and the twitches. Add the taste of the warm blood and the whole thing is raw enjoyment.’

She crouched to watch. ‘Way cool.’

I stopped. ‘Oh my
God
, what am I doing?’

My father came out and closed the door behind him. ‘You’re eating. This is a good thing, Emma. Don’t worry, Simone didn’t see. Louise, honey, go to the front gate and make sure nobody else comes into the garden while she finishes up, please?’

‘Oh look, it moved again,’ Louise said.

‘You are a little ghoul,’ my father said.

‘I’m sorry, Dad. Please don’t watch.’

‘I’m not talking to you, Emma. You need to eat, and if this is what you have to do, it’s what you have to do. I’m talking to that little ghoul Louise. She said she’d do this and I didn’t believe her.’

‘Oh! I forgot.’ Louise pulled out a mobile phone and held it up in front of me. ‘I need to take a video.’

My father snatched the phone out of her hand. ‘I thought you were Emma’s friend. Watch the gate.’

Louise hesitated, then turned and walked to the front gate. ‘What you said though. She needed to eat.’

‘Finish it, Emma,’ my father said. ‘Don’t think about it, just eat.’

I worked my mouth around the chicken, trying not to enjoy the feeling and failing. The texture, the taste and the movement—all worked together in a harmony of sensation that was unlike anything I’d experienced before. I closed my mouth; the chicken was down. I writhed a few times, pushing it further into me, the bones in my throat crushing its body and squeezing out its goodness.

‘You’re done,’ my father said. ‘Let’s go back inside.’

‘At least let me take a photo of the lump!’ Louise said.

I raised my head. ‘There’s a lump?’

‘Don’t worry about it, Emma, just come inside,’ my father said.

‘I need to sleep and digest now,’ I said ruefully.

‘Stay here overnight and rest,’ my father said. ‘You and Simone.’

I felt a jolt of dismay. ‘I can’t, Dad, I have an evaluation tomorrow. I have to be there.’

‘Let them do it without you,’ he said as we went inside.

‘You ate something,’ Simone said, still in my mother’s arms. ‘About time.’ She glanced up at my mother. ‘Any chance of me getting something? Just some ramen would be okay if you have some.’

The doorbell rang, and a second later Louise came in with a steaming plate of hamburger and chips in one hand and a strawberry milkshake in the other. ‘How about this?’ she said.

Simone grinned and jumped up. ‘That’s perfect. Thanks, everybody.’

She grabbed the food off Louise and sat at the table. My mother turned the kettle on in the kitchen, and she and Louise sat to join her.

‘I have to be there,’ I said. ‘It’s an evaluation.’

‘Sounds like just a test,’ Louise said, munching on one of Simone’s chips. ‘You don’t really have to be there, do you? Just tell them. Damn, Emma, you have freaking gods and Immortals and the whole shebang working for you—can’t they look after it themselves?’

‘It’s Er Lang,’ I said.

Her eyes went wide. ‘Oh. That weirdo. I heard about him. He has it in for you.’

‘As soon as Simone is strong enough, she has to take me back down,’ I said. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘It’s okay, Emma,’ Simone said, waving a chip at me. ‘I’ll take you first thing tomorrow morning, is that all right? Can I come back up and stay here for a while though? It’s kinda relaxing with Nan and Pop.’

My mother threw her arm around Simone’s shoulders. ‘That sounds like a great idea.’

‘Sure,’ I said.

‘So tell me, Simone,’ Louise said, stealing another chip. ‘Can you beat Emma up?’

Simone stopped with the hamburger halfway to her
mouth. ‘Uh…’ She looked from Louise to me, then shook her head. ‘Fact is, I’ve been slacking off on the martial arts, and she’s way better than me. Hand to hand or weapons, straight up with no special abilities, and Emma’s got me down cold.’

‘What sort of special abilities?’ Louise said eagerly. She pointed at Simone with the chip. ‘Like, what can you do?’

‘Well, up until about two weeks ago, destroy the world,’ Simone said softly. ‘I could pull out raw yin and make everything cease to exist.’

‘Really?’ Louise said. She grinned. ‘Cool.’

‘You are such a nut, Auntie Louise,’ Simone said, dipping a chip in the aioli. ‘Have another chip; you might as well steal them all.’

I went to the fireplace, which had a small, comforting fire burning in it, and curled up to digest the chicken. I tried not to think about the consequences of having all this raw meat inside me when we went back down to the Earthly Plane the next morning and I returned to human form.

Something touched my head and I heard a soft male voice say, ‘Emma.’

I raised my head, still drowsy from the warmth and the food. It was the stone, crouched in human form in front of me. It sat down cross-legged in front of the fire.

‘Where’d they go?’ I said.

‘I couldn’t follow them all the way,’ it said. ‘South. A long way south. But if they went in a straight line, then it was east of Thailand, in Cambodia, Laos or Vietnam.’

‘That can’t be right; Six said Thailand.’

‘And who did he say that to?’

I hesitated. ‘Me.’

‘Your crown was yanged,’ the stone said sadly. It touched the top of my head. ‘We need to get you a new one.’

My father came out of the bedroom in pyjamas, pulling on a scruffy dark blue dressing gown. ‘Is everything all right, Emma?’ He saw the stone. ‘Who is this?’

The stone rose and bowed slightly, saluting my father. ‘Sir. I’m the Jade Building Block.’

‘You’re the stone?’

The stone nodded.

My father shrugged. ‘Okay, then. Keep it down, you two, you’ll wake Barbie.’ He returned to the bedroom then turned at the doorway. ‘And let Emma sleep, she’s got a belly full of chicken.’

The stone sat cross-legged again and I curled up next to it. It folded up into its stone form. ‘Sorry, I’m drained from taking human form again. I can’t hold it.’

‘How is everybody in the Courts?’ I said.

‘Let me check,’ the stone said. ‘They’re shut down for the night. You pissed off Judge Pao, ma’am, he’s going to make you wait before he lets them out.’

I dropped my head on the floor again. I wanted to sigh but reptiles don’t.

‘You have a couple of demons you need to sort out,’ the stone said.

‘Who?’

‘Yi Hao and Er Hao. They survived.’

I raised my head again and smiled with delight, not caring how it looked. ‘They didn’t explode?’

‘No; they got far enough away before you used the jade. They weren’t the same thing as the copies either;
you were right. They want to go home, ma’am. And Er Hao requests a position closer to you again.’

‘That’s wonderful news,’ I said. ‘But I still don’t trust them. I’ll put them to work in Wudangshan until I’m sure that they’re clear. These copies have been very sneaky.’

‘Good idea.’

‘I wish John was here.’

‘So do I.’

We sat in silence until I went back to sleep.

W
e landed on the lawn in front of the House on the Hill. The seniors were practising on the tennis court, led by Liu. When they saw me, they stopped to kneel—most of them anyway. Some just stared.

Liu walked briskly over to me. ‘Ma’am. I heard what happened. Thank the Heavens you made it down here. Why are you still in serpent form though?’

‘Do you still need me?’ Simone said.

I turned to her. ‘No. You go back and take it easy.’

She kissed the top of my head and disappeared.

I turned back to Liu. ‘I ate as a snake, and if I change back to human I’m concerned that I’ll have a stomach full of raw meat, all the bits and everything. That’s not a risk I’m willing to take.’

Liu’s face went grim. ‘Greeting Er Lang as a serpent isn’t a good idea, ma’am. The traditional greeting is the salute, and you can’t do it.’

‘Are there any snake Shen around that I could ask?’

He shook his head.

I slithered towards the students who were still kneeling on the practice field. ‘How long do we have before he arrives?’

‘He’s due at nine, in an hour, but he’ll probably be at least half an hour late.’

‘To gain face by making us wait.’ I studied the students. ‘Up you get, guys.’ They rose and saluted me in unison. ‘You all look terrific. I’m sure we’ll do just great.’

I turned back to Liu. ‘Which other Masters are here?’

‘Meredith’s around; she has the senior energy experts meditating to control their nerves. Weapons Master Chen is here, as well as Sit and Park.’

‘And poor Leo’s back in Court Ten. He’ll have to buy a flat down there.’

‘Chang tells me there are a couple of pissy missives from Judge Pao in your email, ma’am.’

‘Where is Chang? Is he okay?’

‘He’s down at the Academy, minding your desk.’

‘Good,’ I said. ‘Pass this information on to the Celestial Masters: the Geek, Thirty-three, was destroyed by the Death Mother and Kitty Kwok. The Tiger’s Number One yanged the entire facility, but they got out in time and headed south and east, probably to Laos or Vietnam. I don’t want anything done about it until we get past this evaluation though.’