Her Dakota Man (Book 1 - Dakota Hearts) (14 page)

Even now all I have to do is mention Poppy’s name and I can see it in your eyes. You love her. You’ve always loved her. And a big part of you wished you’d married her instead of me.

Guilt ate at him to the very core. Kelly had settled for less than she deserved. And he’d settled too. He couldn’t be angry with her about that either any more than he could wish Kelly hadn’t done what she’d done. He wouldn’t have his son otherwise.

Where did that leave Poppy? Kelly had betrayed her, too. And every single day Keith would be a reminder of Kelly and how she’d betrayed her best friend. How could he saddle Poppy with that? How could they ever get past that betrayal and have a future? He couldn’t even wrap his mind around it even knowing he wouldn’t change a thing if it meant he wouldn’t have Keith.

Yesterday had been amazing, a gift from God. Logan had dreamed of loving Poppy for more years than he wanted to admit. That was something he’d hold onto for the rest of his life. And now she was leaving.

The sound of the truck horn beeping as it came up the driveway startled him. It was only then that he realized he’d been crying. He wiped his face and took a few deep breaths to collect himself before walking out of the barn. The cold air hit him hard and he welcomed it. At least he wasn’t numb. He didn’t want Poppy to leave. But the little guy who was smiling at him from the truck was the only thing that was going to ground him right now and he needed that in order to move ahead.

“Hi, Daddy!” he heard Keith say with excitement from the back seat of his mom’s truck.

Kate McKinnon’s concerned look gave him pause until he turned to see Poppy dragging her suitcase through the doorway while trying to keep the screen door from closing back on her. Kate rolled down the window as the truck stopped. “Now what did you do?”

“What makes you think I did something?” he said, opening the back door and undoing Keith’s booster seat.

“There’s no way Poppy Ericksen would be carrying that suitcase out the door otherwise.”

Logan pulled Keith into his arms and gave him a squeeze before placing him down on the ground. Keith immediately saw Poppy and ran over to her.

“I’m going to need Donna to come out and watch Keith while I do some work. I need to finish disinfecting the barn floor and let it dry out before I can put the horses back inside. Can you spare her tomorrow?”

“We’re pretty busy at the diner. More people coming into town means more people to feed. Maybe Donna can watch Keith and Alex together again. They’d played good yesterday.”

“Yeah, sure,” he said, grabbing Keith’s backpack of clothes and toys, then slamming the door shut.

“What’s going on?” Kate asked.

“Nothing.”

“Don’t
nothing
me. You and Ethan always thought you were getting something over on me and I always knew when you were up to no good.”

“She’s going back to New York.”

With a raised eyebrow, Kate said, “That’s all?”

“Yeah.”

“Then why is she crying?”

Logan turned quickly just as Keith launched himself into Poppy’s open arms. He didn’t have to be close to see it was true. Or to know that he’d been the one to cause her tears this time, not Kelly.

* * *

“Auntie Poppy, do you have a hurt?” Keith asked, his face serious as he hugged her.

Poppy reached down to give Keith a hug that warmed her heart. This little guy was so open hearted and so sensitive. The last thing she wanted to do was burden him with worry.

“A little one, but it’s all better now with this nice big hug.”

Keith smiled. “Grammie got me a new movie.”

“We’ll have to watch it together later,” Logan said, walking up to them. He looked at the suitcase, then at Poppy. “Say, Keith, why don’t you go into the house with Grammie and see if she can get that movie started on the TV.”

“Yeah! Come on, Grammie!” Keith called out as he quickly climbed up the stairs.

“I’m right behind you, sweetie.” His mother took Keith’s backpack from Logan’s hand and smiled at Poppy. “Why don’t you forget that bag and come on in the house. I’ll make you both some breakfast.”

Poppy didn’t say anything. Her jaw was tight as if she were holding back her emotion. To her credit, Kate didn’t press the issue. She left the decision up to Poppy. Instead she walked into the house jabbering to Keith about how he was getting big enough to help her unpack his clothes and toys from the back pack and put them away.

“When you said you were leaving, I didn’t think you meant right this second. What’s your hurry?” Logan said.

“I didn’t think prolonging this…whatever it is, was going to make things any easier. So why not just leave now. There’s got to be a flight leaving out of Rapid City this afternoon.”

“And if there isn’t?”

She lifted her chin. “I’m used to doing things myself, Logan. I didn’t have a
partner
to help me.”

“What do you want to do, hang around the airport all day and all night until there’s a flight?”

“If I have to.”

“That’s ridiculous. If you insist on leaving, at least make sure you have a flight before you take off. I mean, my mother is making pancakes and you know she’s not going to let you leave until you eat.”

“Logan.”

“I don’t want you leave. Not like this.” His admission surprised even him. The internal tug of war he’d been feeling all morning had him working hard just to break him somehow. And he didn’t even know why.

Poppy glanced back at the house and then at him. “I’ll have breakfast,” she conceded. “I need to say good-bye to Keith anyway. I don’t want him to think I’m just running off. He won’t understand. Let me just get the bag in my trunk.”

“I have it,” he said, grabbing the handle of her suitcase. His hand connected with hers and immediately felt like electric shock running through him. She lifted her gaze to him and he knew in an instant that she felt it too. But then just as she had on the day she arrived, she lifted her chin to him in challenge.

“I’ve got it,” she said, pulling at the suitcase as she turned to walk in the other direction. Not wanting to let go of the tiny connection he had with her, Logan hesitated before letting go. But as he did, Poppy pulled in the other direction harder than she needed to and lost her footing when he released the bag. She went crashing down to the ground, toppling over the suitcase as she tried to right herself.

With his heart in his throat, he ran to her side to help her up. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” she said, slightly winded from the fall. Logan took both hands to help her to her feet. But as she put her weight down on her foot, it gave out and she slid to the ground again, wincing in pain.

“Where does it hurt?”

She closed her eyes. “My ankle. I stepped on this dried rut in the ground and my foot just turned.”

He heard the sound of the screen door opening and little feet jumping onto the porch. Logan turned and saw Kate standing on the porch with Keith, a worried look on her face.

“Is she okay?” Kate asked.

“Call Hawk,” he said.

“No, it’s fine,” Poppy said. “I’ll be fine.”

“Sure you will. And Hawk will confirm that when he gets here. We’ll put some ice on your ankle to keep the swelling down and just keep you off your feet.”

Bending over, he picked Poppy up in his arms and held her tight. “Put your arms around my neck.”

She did as she was told. Her face was incredibly close to his. He could feel her breath on his cheek, warming his skin against the cold wind.

“I didn’t do this on purpose, Logan.”

“It was an accident.”

“I can still leave.”

He climbed the porch and walked through the door as his mom held it open.

Keith looked up at Poppy with the same worried face Logan had seen many times before Kelly had died and Logan would have to carry her to bed.

“Auntie Poppy’s going to be fine, little man. She just needs to rest. Everything is going to be fine.”

And if he said it enough to himself, maybe he could will it to be true.

* * *

Keith snuggled up next to Poppy on the bed and looked at the stack of photos she’d brought with her to share with him. Hawk had come and gone and confirmed that Poppy’s ankle was a sprain and as long as she didn’t go dancing, there was no reason she couldn’t take a plane home to New York tomorrow. She had one more night in the old house and then she’d be gone. Logan had spent the day working outside, so she chose to spend her last night there sharing memories of Kelly with Keith.

“That’s Mommy,” he said, quietly pointing to a picture of Kelly and Poppy when they were in high school.

“That’s right,” she said. “And that is me.”

It was one of the few pictures she had of just her and Kelly. Most all of the pictures she had were of her and Logan, or the three of them.

“Your mommy and daddy and me where always together back then.” Poppy pulled out another picture from the pile and handed it to Keith. “See? I think this was a picture your uncle Ethan took of us when we went to a carnival a couple of towns away.”

Keith giggled. “Daddy’s wearing a funny hat!”

“It’s a sombrero. He won it playing a carnival game. He does look a little goofy in it, doesn’t he?” They both laughed. She handed him another picture.

“Who’s this with Daddy and Uncle Ethan?” Keith said, pulling a picture out of the pile.

Poppy looked at the picture and smiled bittersweet. “That was your Uncle Wade.”

Keith frowned. “Did I meet him?”

“No, he…died before you were even born. He was your dad’s oldest brother.”

“Oh.” Keith already moved on to another picture of a water balloon fight they’d had in the parking lot of Kate’s diner. “Uncle Keith is all wet.”

“That’s because your dad soaked him with a big balloon filled with water.”

Keith giggled. “Daddy is wet, too.”

“We all were. See, here is another one.” She handed Keith another picture of the bunch of them; the McKinnon boys, Poppy, Kelly, Denny and his younger sister Maddie. They’d laughed a lot that day. Even though Kate had taken the picture of all of them, she was mad as hell about the spent balloons all over the parking lot and made them clean it all up.

Poppy’s heart squeezed with the memory. These days were true. She could look back on these memories and hold them dear without pain. She’d have to remember that when she returned to New York.

* * *

Logan stood outside the door listening to the chatter between Keith and Poppy until all he could hear was music from the TV, signaling Keith’s movie had ended. When he looked inside the room, he saw that Keith was asleep, snuggled up against Poppy and she was stroking his head, looking at him with love.

“I didn’t think he’d last the whole movie,” Logan said, slowly walking into the room. He sat on the bed next to Keith and just looked at his son.

“He looks a little like Kelly,” she said.

“You think so? I think he’s McKinnon down to the bone.”

Poppy smiled at him. “No, there’s Kelly there.”

Logan was quiet a moment, struggling to find the words and knowing there was no better way to ask it. “Do you hate her for what she did?”

Shocked, Poppy stopped stroking Keith’s head and stared at Logan. “No. I was angry. Crazy angry, in fact. But I never hated her. Especially after she told me why she did it. Kelly was and will always be my best friend. What she did was wrong. But I forgave her. And I’ll always love her.”

Logan nodded slowly, amazed that Poppy’s unconditional love for Kelly had remained through it all.

“I should probably get him into his own bed, huh?”

Poppy smiled down at Keith. “He’s fine. I don’t mind him sleeping here. If he wakes up in the middle of the night, I can bring him back to his room.”

“What about your ankle?”

She cocked her head to one side and gave him a half smile. “Do you really think I needed to be bed ridden all day? I can hobble down the hall with no trouble. Even Hawk said I should be fine enough to walk as long as I don’t push it.”

He nodded and was about to leave her for the night, but something stopped him. He wasn’t sure what. Maybe it was the familiarity of the room. Perhaps nostalgia, or maybe that Logan knew Poppy was leaving and he wouldn’t have another chance.

“I didn’t want to buy this ranch. Kelly insisted. I wasn’t…we weren’t in a good place then, before this little guy was born. Everything about this place reminded me of you.”

“That’s why Kelly wanted it.”

Confused, he said, “Why?”

“She knew I couldn’t come here and watch the two of you live a life I’d dreamed of for us. That was her insurance.”

“I don’t understand.”

Poppy stretched over to the nightstand where the stack of letters wrapped in a ribbon were sitting as if they’d been placed there for just this moment. Poppy handed the letters to Logan.