Her Kiss (Griffin) (3 page)

CHAPTER 7

I’m not going to lie: Ally’s songs
were weird. But I was so into her cute kind of weird, that I wanted her. Bad.

I figured me giving her back her
notebook would be my way in with her. So, that morning I was prepared. I had
Ally’s notebook in my backpack—and I had my backpack on my back, and I
was ready to stroll up to her and let her see that maybe I deserved another
cinnamon baked treat. Or maybe even another song about me, since she had songs
in there titled stuff like—
My
Neighbor Gave Me The Cutest Cuddly Kitten
, and
If My Boyfriend Forgets My Recital Again I Think I’m Going To Scream.

I just read those titles randomly
as I was shutting her notebook. I didn’t snoop through it or anything. I swear.
Though I did see she also had another song in there about me called,
Griffin Piper Melts My Heart
. Actually,
the title went like this,
AKA: He Carried
My Books; AKA: His Hands Are Rough But His Heart Is
… I’m not exactly sure
what it said, but I’m sure it was girly and nice, though weird, and so of course
I loved it. And I really wanted to give her notebook back to her so she could
continue with her weirdness.

And also, you know, I wanted to
make a move.

“I’m going to gouge his eyes
out—and then hers too.” Those beautiful words came from Hailey. Her latest
boyfriend was now her
ex
-boyfriend,
and he was already dating someone new, and he seemed to only be doing it to
piss Hailey off … and it was working.

She started writing him a hate
letter that she titled, “Why you suck and why you must die.”

She was at my locker as she wrote
it, ranting curse words as she scribbled stuff down. Every once in a while, my
friend Mason would help her out. He’s creative with curse words.

In between helping Hailey with her
“You Suck” paper, he was rummaging through my locker and telling me about this
“juicy” fan-girl he met at a party the other night.

“I know I let you borrow my history
book,” he kept saying in between telling me about “slurping” and “hair-gel” and
something about an abandoned house. I wasn’t really listening. Don’t get me
wrong, Mason is on my hockey team and if I was ever going to rank my friends
(which I don’t, but for some reason Hailey always tries to get me to)—but
I guess Mason would probably be my “best” friend. I guess. Hailey says he is. I
let her think those kinds of things if she wants, ’cause I don’t care. And it
truly doesn’t matter as far as I can tell. I mean, I get invited to everyone’s
parties and everyone pretty much loves me. Or if they don’t they keep it to
themselves, since I’m a pretty big guy and I pretty much own the hockey team
(not literally).

Anyway, this is how things went
that morning at my locker: I was thinking about Ally, Hailey was writing a hate
letter to her ex-boyfriend, and Mason was telling us about this “juicy” girl he
met at a party. (But I’m going to tell you something about Mason, just as a
side note: he was in love with his for-a-month-or-two-only stepsister, Summer
Baker. He’d never admit it, since, you know, that sister-situation thing, but
he had it for her bad and we all knew it. Still we let him talk about other
girls—it’s not like they didn’t exist in his life—it’s just we knew
they’d disappear if he ever got his hands on Summer—well, his lips on
her.)

So, anyway, Mason was talking about
some chick that he didn’t really care about—and meanwhile, I was scanning
around for the one I suddenly
did
care about—Cookie Girl. I didn’t tell Mason or Hailey about this though.
One, because I knew Hailey would freak out. I mean, I don’t normally chase
girls. Or look for them.
If they are around, awesome.
If they’re not?
Well, one will probably come along any
minute. Like I said, I’m lazy.

But I was actually in lookout mode
for Ally. But see, you have to understand: Ally was a sweet church
girl—and that freaked Hailey out, bad. I swear, if any time it even
seemed
I was interested in Ally, Hailey
would growl and show her canines and practically bite my head off. She said
Ally would “corrupt me.” No joke. Hailey claimed I was “impressionable.” She
did ever since that cookie incident. She said I was looking for someone to
worship—which is weird because she also said I was “heartless” when it
came to girls. So, she kind of worked both sides of the fence.

Anyway, it had me looking for Ally
while trying to
not
look like I was
looking for anyone.

It ended up being easy to spot the
pretty, glowing church girl though—once I looked around. I mean, I
glanced up, and—
whoa!
Her eyes
were on me.

My pulse thumped wild.

She was standing with her two
friends—Jazz and Destiny (I didn’t actually know their names back then)
but they seemed to be standing where they were so they could watch me. And
whisper about me. It made me wonder how long—as in weeks … or months
(???)—they’d been doing that. Stalking me.
Without me
noticing.
A huge smile grew on my lips. And my heart pounded hard.
Cookie Girl had been watching me. Cool. Especially because, you know, I’d been
secretly thinking about her.

So, yeah, my pulse
jack-hammered
to look up and find her eyes on me—like
Whoa, I’m being violated
. It was so cool
.
Because it was
her—Cookie Girl.

For a minute I just rubbed my chin,
watching her watch me from her far off safe distance across the crowded school
hallway.

We stood like that for a good full
minute, I’d say. Because I was just enjoying it—being manhandled by her
pretty eyes.

After my few savored moments of
pure staring seduction, I strolled away from Mason and Hailey without a word.
Left Mason to try to like a girl he didn’t. And left Hailey because I didn’t
want her to make a scene over the fact I
was
—yes—actually
into Church Girl. And who knows, maybe I
would
worship her … if she gave me a chance. (After all, I dug the stalking … and the
glowing.)

As I sauntered toward wide-eyed
Ally, at first she just stared at me, with her pretty frosted lips parted slightly,
like
Wow, he’s getting really close
.
Maybe we’ll brush arms or something
. But
when I got closer to her still and she actually figured out I was actually
coming over to her—not just in her general direction—but, to
her,
specifically
.
Suddenly, she gasped the words, “Holy Smokes!”—
loud
.
Like she saw a zombie rise from the dead or something.
THEN,
instead of letting me give her the notebook—or say a
word
—she bolted away from me. Lightening fast.

What
the—???

I watched her run away with my
eyebrows quirked, and my lips spreading into a huge grin. Man, the chick was
weird.

I wanted her. Bad.

CHAPTER 8

Okay, I had absolutely no clue what
that was about—why Ally took off running away from me like she did. I
scratched my chin watching her run through the crowded hallway, darting through
student traffic—fleeing from me … though she’d just been staring at me.

I sighed with a faint grin, my
heart beating with a strange mixture of amusement, bewilderment, and,
curiously, a tiny bit of delight. Not delight that she ran from me, of course.
Just delight that she was so entertaining.
I mean, I enjoy
the unexpected.
And wow, that had been unexpected.

I cocked my head as I watched her
disappear, and breathed out a tiny laugh.

Finally, I turned back to my
locker, finding Mason and Hailey laughing their heads off at what just went
down.

“Forget your deodorant this
morning, Grief Master?” Mason called out.

“Apparently,” I grinned, turning
back one last time to see where Ally had run off to, but she was long gone.

I shook my head, but I was smiling.

Weird, man.

“What was that about?” Mason asked
when I slunk back to my ransacked locker, Ally’s notebook still in my backpack.
His eyes twinkled. “You wanted another cookie?”

Still smiling, I lied. “Of course.”

I tried to make it sound like, ‘Why
else would I talk to her?’

But Hailey stared at me
suspiciously. Like she was pretty sure I was a traitor.

No way was I going to let her know
about Ally’s notebook. She’d burn it. Or read it. … Or read it and then burn
it. And do some sort of voodoo curse on it.

Mason, I might have told if we were
alone. He wasn’t a hater of nice people. They didn’t make him want to bite the
heads off puppies.

But Hailey was another story.
(Watch out puppies.)

CHAPTER 9

Despite what happened that morning,
you would have thought—probably—that me giving Ally back her
notebook would be cake. Well anyway, I thought that. And if you thought it too,
you’d be wrong. Dead wrong. The chick wouldn’t let me near her. I mean that
literally. If she saw me coming towards her, she darted the other way. Every.
Time.

During sixth period I left my class
early so I could catch her before she left
her
class. I figured if I trapped her in the doorway, she couldn’t run. But it
turned out, she was in her chorus class. And at the exact same time I stood in
the doorway waiting for her, she just happened to be singing a solo. Man, she
could sing. I stood listening to her like I was Alice in Frickin’ Wonderland. I
was in total awe. And wonder. In a trance of mmmm.

But then she saw me watching her,
and she did some startled-jumpy-jolt thing and almost fell off her platform.

I left the doorway really quick,
since I didn’t want her to break her neck or anything. I leaned against the
wall outside of her classroom, and ran a hand over my face. Not exactly
discouraged much, just confused, and slightly amused.

I closed my eyes and kind of
laughed, not about her almost falling, but this whole situation. Yeah, I was
trying to give her back her notebook, but she didn’t know that. She didn’t have
a clue. I had no idea what was going on in her head—but the cute little
stalker chick was clearly avoiding me. So, face it, this probably wasn’t the
best time to approach her—not right after the sight of me almost made her
do a nose-dive.

That’s why when this blond, who I
don’t actually know the name of, came rushing out of Ally’s classroom all
smiling and excited, and gushed out, “Hi Griffin! Were you looking for me?”

I lied and said, “Yeah.” Though I
had no idea who she was.

But I let her drag me into the
nearest janitor’s closet for a little make-out. After all, got to keep the fans
happy. And okay, I needed to get my mind off confusing, adorable Ally. ’Cause
now I had her beautiful song stuck in my head.

But the chick wouldn’t let me near
her.

I couldn’t catch a break.

CHAPTER 10

Trying to give shy Ally back her
notebook—it was hopeless. It was like her cute, sweet words in her
journal said one thing—but her actions said something way, way different.

No matter how much she might have liked
holding my “rough hands,” the chick wouldn’t let me near her.

It seemed like she thought I was
the devil or something and if I got near her, I’d steal her soul.

Seeing her run from me time and
time again kept making me laugh, though. I mean
What
the—????

I wasn’t used to girls doing
that—at all—running from me. Usually girls did the opposite. I
mean, the ones that seemed to want my attention. They’d go out of their way to
get it. Not Ally. But she seemed to
want
it. I was pretty sure she did. I mean, I’d look up and see her staring at
me—but if
I even took a step toward her
,
she’d run
.

Something I should mention, I
guess, she wrote more about me in that notebook than just what I mentioned
earlier. She didn’t just write those three songs about me—not that I saw.
She also wrote that she liked my lips. That she wondered what they would feel
like on hers.

Well, I had every intention of
letting her find out—only I couldn’t even give her back her book, so the
kissing thing didn’t seem like it would happen.

Like I said, her written words said
one thing—but her actions said something completely different. It had
that saying swimming around in my head—actions speak louder than words.
But I didn’t exactly like what her actions were saying. They seemed to be saying
she was still afraid of me.

I liked her words way better. Her
words made me feel a spark inside me that I never did before. I mean, girls
could make me feel things. Good things. But it wasn’t the same as what Ally
made me feel. And she did it without even getting close to me.

…. But why didn’t she want to get
close to me?

Man, I just didn’t get it.

Finally, I turned to Hailey for
advice, because she was a girl—sort of.

“Okay, I don’t get it,” I told
Hailey. “Why does Ally keep running from me?”

Hailey laughed. I knew she would.

Still, I resorted to Hailey, since
she was the only girl I actually talked to about stuff. Earlier in the week,
I’d finally broke down and told her about Ally’s notebook. I didn’t tell her
what
I’d read in it—that it
was full of songs and stuff—just that Ally had written about me in it,
and that the stuff she wrote made it sound like she liked me. I didn’t go into
great detail about it—at all—because Hailey can be mean. Not to me,
ever, but to outsiders—people that don’t hang with us. Especially people
like Ally (cookie-sweet and innocent and church-going).
Especially
now.
Hailey is what
you call territorial. She saw Ally as a threat to her territory—me. But
she was going to have to get over it, because I was all into the thought of
letting Ally find out what my lips feel like—and letting her eat a
burrito with me … if that was still on her fantasy list. Heck, if it was, she
could eat one with me every day. The girl was weird—and I liked her.

So, though I’d never sat with a
girl in the cafeteria before—or held hands with one either—I was
willing to do that with Ally. More than willing. I knew I had a reputation, but
I didn’t start it. And despite what everyone thought, I could be nice to a
girl. She just had to be like Ally … well, okay, maybe she just had to
be
Ally.

Anyway, yeah.
I finally broke down and sought out Hailey for some insight. I leaned against
the locker next to hers. “I’m confused. Why does Ally keep running from me?”

Hailey stiffened, then laughed,
shutting her locker with a loud slam. “You’re a bad boy, Griffin. Didn’t you
know that? Girls
dream
about
guys like you. But girls like Ally Grange
—
Goody-good
Girls—won’t ever go for you.
Ever
.
You fill their fantasies—but in real life you make them quiver and run
away.”

Okay, that sounded like Ally.

I scrubbed a hand over my face, not
exactly encouraged. “So … what can I do?”

Hailey laughed again, like this
whole conversation was hilarious—me interested in a church girl … or any
girl. I waited her out, since I could see the irony. She was always coming to
me for advice about guys (I’d never come to her for advice—not once). But
my advice for her was always the same,
‘If
he doesn’t call you, move on.’

Well, Ally wasn’t calling. Or even
letting me near her. So, yeah, I got that Hailey was saying in her
not-so-subtle and very-pleased way that I should move on. I knew she would be
thrilled when I finally did … only, I didn’t want to.

I leaned the back of my head
against the locker. Waiting.

She rolled her eyes, obviously not
wanting to give me helpful advice—anyway, not something helpful to get me
in with Ally Grange—the girl Hailey had growled and grumbled about ever
since “the cookie,” and even really before that. Nice people bug her; the same
as mean ones bug me. (Though Hailey doesn’t … usually. But that’s just because
I’ve known her so long. She’s kind of like a grouchy kid brother to me. [But
don’t tell her I said that.])

I waited for Hailey’s insightful
words, bracing myself, knowing she can be kind of brutal. Still, her brutality
is pretty much always laced with honesty, always. So, I didn’t really hold it
against her. I respected her for it, sort of, pretty much. She didn’t hold back
her punches, that was for sure. I went to different people if I wanted
coddling—like
any
other
person in the world. But right now I needed an honest answer:
What could I do to get Ally?

“Nothing!” Hailey said. “Griffin,
girls know what you do. You break hearts—and don’t even try to deny it.”

She looked me challengingly in the
eye, her gleaming gaze dark and glistening. Whoa. Scary. I looked away, kind of
unsettled. More from her words though than her evil-eye.

But here’s the thing: I didn’t go
around
trying
to break girls’
hearts. Ever. That was never my intent. Ever. But girls all seemed to want
“love.” I was too young for that—or immature—or something. I just
didn’t feel it … and I never said I did. In fact, I would always tell girls I
was just having fun—and they’d say they were too, but then I’d always
hear later girls were crying about me. So apparently their fun and my fun were
not the same thing. (Theirs didn’t actually seem that fun—I mean, they
cried
. And I just moved on to
another girl. It was messed up. I know. But not my fault.)

Hailey went on, sounding
excruciatingly blissful to get to explain this to me, “Girls know that,
Griffin—they aren’t dumb. They know you’ll break their hearts. But some
girls are willing to risk the pain—or they are exceedingly delusional and
over-confident and somehow think they can “change” you. That they’re the ones
that can.
That they’re “special” … at least in your eyes.
It’s your fault they think that though, Griffin. You make them think that.”

I looked away from her again. I
can’t help it if I like girls—they
are
special to me. I like them—all of them.
As long as
they’re nice.
I may not “change” for them … but I never try to hurt
them.

I’m pretty sure Hailey could see
she was making me feel like a dirt-bag. It didn’t make her ease up though.
That’s not her style. She’ll go for the kill. (Unless she feels sorry for you,
which
she seldom does, and sure didn’t feel it for me right
then.) But as she went on, she
did
sound like she was back-peddling a little, but it still wasn’t useful to me,
and definitely didn’t make me feel any better.

Still, she conceded, “Okay, I think
they
all
get you aren’t going
to hold their hand, or take them to a school dance. They all get that they’re
not
that
special to you. But
still, most of them are willing to put up with squashing their girly dreams for
a chance to have you hold them and kiss them … but not girls like Ally Grange.
Girls like her play it safe. I mean, they might fantasize about you—the
kissing and holding—but they will
never
go for you. Actually, Griffin, for the most part—in reality—you
only attract a certain type of girl—stupid ones.”

Um, ouch.

Hailey quickly went on, apparently
enjoying stomping my heart—since she got to do it so seldom. I mean, this
was the first time I’d ever asked her for girl advice, so really it was her
first opportunity to rant about me being a guy. She huffed, “But to answer your
question about why Ally runs from you—girls like her keep their hearts
safe—they won’t risk it getting broken. Instead, they go for guys like
Baker—“safe guys” that will behave like they want, and take them to the
dances they want, and hold their hands. They save guys like you only for their
dreams—but will always—
always
—run
from you.” Hailey smirked with a joyful gleam in her dark dancing eyes. “Give
it up, Griffin. You’ll never get her.”

Wow. She was practically dancing a
jig to get to tell me this junk. Still, it seemed to be true. Everything she
said. Whenever I tried to get near Ally, she’d run. Literally
run
.

Finally, I just mailed Ally’s
notebook to her. I didn’t want to break her heart … and apparently she didn’t
want me to either. The thing was though, I didn’t really think I would. But she
wasn’t going to give me a chance to find out.

Maybe that was smart.

Apparently, I’m a wad.