Hidden Darkness (Hidden Saga Book 4) (10 page)

“Where’s Lad going?” Vancia asked, turning toward the back of the ballroom.

              I spun around to see a glimpse of his golden head as he left through the ceiling-height double doors. “I don’t know. I’ll go check on him.”

              “He’s fine,” Nox assured me. “I’m sure it’s some bit of business. Nobody makes a decision around here without checking with him—wish it was the same in the Dark Court—bunch of greedy renegades.” He laughed. “If he’s not back soon, I’ll go and rescue him. I need you to stay here and prevent a catfight between my wife and Ava.”

              Following his gaze, I spotted Ava and Culley dancing together. Both of them glanced furtively over at our group as they spoke in hushed tones.

              “What happened between you two anyway?” I asked Vancia.

              “She pretended to be my friend, and then she betrayed me. Davis had her spy on me when I went out to California to start modeling. She told him everything I said, everything I did. He treated me like a virtual prisoner after that.”

              “Oh. Now I see why you acted so weird when you saw her.”

              “She told me she was sorry a few minutes ago—you know, mind to mind, but it’s a little late for that. I don’t trust her. You shouldn’t either.”

“I don’t have to trust her,” I said. “I trust Lad.”

Vancia nodded in agreement. “You should. But I’d keep an eye on her anyway. Although—I guess I can’t blame her for
everything
. She said Davis
made
her talk with his Sway. You know how powerful he was.”

“That’s true, honey,” Nox said, wrapping an arm around Vancia’s waist and pressing a kiss to her temple. “Only Ryann was able to resist his glamour.”

              “Let’s hope Lad can resist
her
glamour,” I muttered, watching Ava’s gorgeous red hair swing in a thick curtain as Culley spun her. Her figure was Elven perfection in the clingy black dress she wore tonight. Lad loved me but he wasn’t blind. There was no
not
noticing that girl.

              “What do you mean?” Nox asked, suddenly keenly interested in the conversation. “Do you think she’s here to spy on him? She’s
supposed
to be an ambassador.” His glower indicated someone on the Dark Council was going to get their ear chewed off or worse when he got out to California, or the next time he could get a good cell signal. 

              “I’m not sure exactly what her intentions are,” I said. “But Lad acts weird around her. I’m sure the sexual glamour isn’t helping.”

              Nox looked at me strangely, his heavy dark brows drawn together, shaking his head. “She doesn’t have sexual glamour.”

              “But… she’s always flirting with Lad. And he’s…” I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what else to make of the distraction I’d witnessed in him since her arrival. “Are you sure?”

              Nox’s expression confirmed it. And he should know. “She doesn’t have it. And even if she did, you’d have nothing to worry about. The boy is whipped for you.”

              “
So
true,” Vancia added, laying her head on Nox’s chest.

              “So… if that’s not her glamour—what
is
?”

              Nox shrugged. “Thora’s never said. When I get to L.A. I can ask her—or Audun—in person mind to mind. Before then, we could try asking Ava, but we can’t be sure of an honest answer.”

              A while later, Lad re-entered the ballroom and surveyed it, catching sight of me. I smiled at him, but his expression stayed stern. His glance went to Nox, then Ava, then he walked over to a group of people and started talking with them.

              Troubled, I left Nox and Ava to join Lad. “I’ll talk to y’all later. Enjoy the party.” As I came to his side, he glanced down at me and nodded then continued the conversation he was having with a member of his Council.

Since I couldn’t hear their communication, I stood there quietly, waiting, and feeling more awkward around Lad than I’d felt in months. In fact, other than our breakup, things had never been this strained between us. Something was off about him. There was a coldness that frightened me.

When he and the man finally wrapped things up, Lad turned and looked at me directly. His eyes roamed over me, and for a moment, his face warmed. Then the uncharacteristic frown returned.

“Excuse me. I see someone I must speak with privately.”

He started to walk away, but I wrapped my hand around his wrist to stop him. “Lad—is everything… all right?”

He glanced at my hand on him then back at my face. “Yes, of course. Why?”

“You just seem… I don’t know…”

With a flick of his wrist, he broke my grip. “I’m busy, Ryann. I have obligations. You’re going to have to be understanding if you’re to be queen here. I’ve
certainly
been understanding with
you.
”

I did a double-blink, almost speechless with surprise. “What? What does that mean?”

He stared at me for a moment, then shook his head and blew out an irritated breath. “Nothing. I have to go. Why don’t you find your friends Vancia… and
Nox
.”

              Stunned, I wandered away and made a plate of food I didn’t actually want to eat. Spooning various items onto the dish, I did a little calming self-talk.
Lad is busy. This isn’t a party to him—it’s work.
As Nox said, many people needed him. I couldn’t monopolize his time, and I wouldn’t pout about it. This was his life. If I wanted to be a part of it, I had to share him with his people.

              Thinking back over our interactions at the beginning of the evening, I racked my brain for anything I could have done to upset him. Everything had been fine. Lad had complimented my dress, looked at me in that loving way he always did. He had made a remark about me being eager to see Nox, but he was clearly joking, and he’d been as thrilled to see Nox and Vancia as I was. 

A while later when Lad seemed more relaxed, talking and laughing with someone, I approached him again, just to be near him. He all but ignored me.

I walked away and took a seat at an open table near the orchestra, working hard to keep myself from overreacting. Or crying. Busy or not, he was being rude. He wasn’t acting like himself. It was too much like the worst time in our relationship when he drove me away purposely.

              The chair beside me moved, and Vancia sat down. “What’s going on? You bored with all this Elven nonsense yet?”

              I looked into her eyes, absorbing the desperately needed kindness. “Something’s wrong.”

              “What do you mean?” She glanced around. “Did Ava do something?”

              “No. It’s Lad. Something’s wrong with him. He’s not acting right. His face doesn’t look right.”

              Her eyes searched the ballroom and found him now speaking to Ava. Culley was by her side, yawning and rolling his shoulders, obviously bored out of his mind. Ava dipped her gaze and then threw her head back in a laugh. Lad grinned at her like she was the most adorable thing he’d ever seen.             

              “He loves you, Ryann—only you,” Vancia said. “Trust me on that one.”

              Thinking of his beautiful handmade wedding gift, the words he’d written, I said, “I know. But he sure isn’t acting like it tonight.”

              “He must have a lot on his mind. Nox said he bit his head off a little while ago, too.” She patted my hand resting on the tabletop. “It’s not easy being with a king, is it? They’ve got so many demands on their time. Nox has spent half our honeymoon running around negotiating with the European tribes, wining and dining their leaders. And I’ve already done enough ‘hostessing’ to last me a lifetime.”

              “But you’re not sorry? That you married him?”

              She laughed. “I’m so in love with him I can hardly see straight. And the
other
half of the honeymoon—let’s just say it makes it all worthwhile.”

              Her blissful smile filled me with envy. She and Nox had what I so desperately wanted with Lad. Closeness. Bonding. Eternity. His frosty demeanor tonight made it feel like a dream that would never come true. I was overcome with a desperate wish that we’d already bonded, so nothing could threaten to tear us apart.

              I sighed, and it must have been pretty loud, because Vancia patted my hand again. Then she looked at me speculatively.

“Ryann… have you two… uh…”

Reading her face, I gathered her meaning without her having to say it. “No. Not for my lack of trying. Lad wants to wait until we’re married.”

“The Light Elves are old-school all right.” She paused as if considering whether to say any more. “You know… one thing that always works for me is a sheer nightgown.”

“Vancia!” My cheeks instantly went hot, and my eyes felt like they were bulging out of my head. My gaze went to the floor, the tablecloth, the dancers.

She laughed out loud. “I’m telling you—it gets Nox’s mind
off
of business and back where it belongs—with me. And he’s so much more relaxed and fun afterward. I have a brand new nightgown in my suitcase that I bought in Paris. It was going to be a bridal shower present for you, but you can have it early—if you’d like to try it.”

I shook my head, my heart pounding. “I can’t.”

Vancia once again glanced over in Lad’s direction. “You sure about that girlfriend?” 

I followed her gaze to see Ava now practically draped across Lad’s body she was standing so close. Culley had disappeared. Nox was wrong about that sexual glamour—what else could it be?

“Where is it?” I asked, getting to my feet. “In your room?”

Vancia grinned and pushed back from the table. “Follow me.”

The nightgown was exquisite, and as advertised, it was sheer.

I stared at myself in the full-length mirror, the contours of my body clearly visible beneath the delicate fabric. When Lad saw me in this—if he saw me in this—there’d be no doubt in his mind what I was there for.

              I still hadn’t made up my mind to wear it. I’d followed Vancia to her room, accepted her generous gift, and then gone back to my own suite to try it on.  

              My thoughts were racing almost as ferociously as my heart. What if somebody caught me sneaking into Lad’s room? Well, most everyone was still at the banquet. And really, what were they going to say—no? I was the king’s betrothed. I had a right to come and go as I pleased.

              What if the nightgown worked and Lad and I got started and I messed things up somehow? I really didn’t know what I was doing. He was already in a bad mood. What if I made things worse?

              And that brought me to my chief concern. What if he saw me in this transparent gift-wrap and turned me away? I’d never be able to look into his eyes again. This whole scheme could blow up in my face.

              But what if he
did
like it? I spun around and peeked over my shoulder to check out the back view.
Okay then.

              What if Lad saw me and wanted me and things went
right
? All this worry for the future and concern over his recent behavior would be gone. We’d be bonded for life. This very night. And in just over a month, we’d be married.

              I wrapped a heavy robe around myself to hide the naughty secret underneath and let that happy thought propel me out of my room and down the hallway toward Lad’s quarters. My breaths were quick and shallow as I scanned the corridors, praying I wouldn’t run into a servant or—God forbid—Lad’s mother.

              Pulse racing, I stole through the dim hallways like a cat burglar, jumping at the slightest faraway noise or flicker of light. I ended up seeing no one. Reaching Lad’s door, I pushed it open and peeked inside. Empty. He was still out, just as I’d hoped.

              I slipped inside and shut the door behind me, still hardly able to believe I was here. My heartbeat thrummed not just in my chest, but in every part of me. Before when we’d discussed bonding before marriage, it was just that—a discussion. I was hoping there would be no discussion tonight. If Lad saw me in this and wanted to
talk
—we had a problem.

              For a few minutes, I paced the room, nervous and unsure of what to do with myself. The lighting provided by the phosphorescent stones was already perfect, romantic and low. Mood music wasn’t exactly an option here with no electronics. That was probably cheesy anyway, right?

I went to his bed and stretched out on top of the coverlet, experimenting with poses. Should I lie on my side, facing the doorway, so he’d see me there when he first walked in? Should I get under the covers? No. That would defeat the purpose of the nightgown.

              The debate ended when I heard the door opening. Without even thinking about it, I shot off the bed and stood in front of it with my bare feet and might-as-well-be-bare body, my thoughts scrambling and my heart whizzing around my chest like an entire pack of fireworks that had been lit from the same fuse.

              Lad entered the room and turned to close the door, his wide shoulders slumping with relief. Then he turned around. And froze in place.

              “Hi,” I said, the word strangled and barely audible.

              His eyes traveled over my body, blazing with heat and giving me hope. He liked what he saw.

Or at least I thought he did. My emotional glamour was overwhelmed by a sense of yearning I was pretty sure was his. Could have been mine—he looked incredible standing there in his formal attire with raging desire in his eyes.

              I was as scared as I’d ever been in my life. I felt so vulnerable standing before him, basically naked, waiting for him to respond. I took a tentative step toward him. He took one toward me.

              Lad swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple moving under the smooth tan skin of his throat. His voice was rough and low. “Why are you here, Ryann?”

              “I…” I had to stop and swallow, too. My mouth had gone completely dry. Then I glanced down at myself, thinking it had to be pretty obvious why I was here. Finally I managed to speak. My voice was shaking. “I love you Lad. And I want you—like I’ve never wanted anything before in my life. I want to be yours completely. Forever. Let’s not wait anymore. Make me yours. Make love to me.”

              The wait for his response was excruciating. I watched his eyes as they warmed and filled with unmistakable anticipation. He took another step toward me, closed the distance between us, and reached for me.

              His fingers coasted lightly over my bare arm then traced the plunging neckline of the gown. He licked his lips and took a shuddering breath as he pushed one tiny strap from my shoulder. His gaze was riveted to my chest.

             
Yes. Yes. Oh God, finally
.

              And then he stopped. His eyelids closed. He scowled, and a full body shudder passed through him. He fell back a step, his hand dropping away from me. “I think you should leave.”

              The breath I’d been holding left me in a painful gust. I could barely manage to ask, “Really?”

              “You should go, Ryann. I’m tired. It’s been a long day.” He turned and walked away from me toward a chair on the opposite side of the room, gripping it so hard I heard the wood crack. His arms were so tense they shook.

              Alarmed, and no longer the least bit turned on, I followed him. “Lad—
what
is the matter?” I pleaded for an explanation. “What’s going on with you? Talk to me.”

              He wouldn’t look at me. “Just go, Ryann. We’ll talk in the morning.”

              His tone was so angry. I had expected some resistance, maybe. But not fury. Was he that serious about waiting?

Or was it something else?
Someone
else? I wanted a second opinion on whether that little witch Ava had sexual glamour. She’d done
something
to him, I was sure of it.

And I’d made a huge mistake coming here.

Humiliated, I drew on the robe and left the room, casting a last glance back before leaving. Lad was still facing the wall, not even watching me go. What the hell was going on? There
was
desire in his eyes. I’d seen it. I’d felt his longing for me. How could he just send me away like this with no answers?

Battling my tear ducts, I rushed through the dark hallways, desperate for the sanctuary of my own room where I could let the tears flow freely. This had been the night from hell, and I just wanted it to end. I rounded the last corner before reaching my room and ran straight into someone.

Assuming it was a servant, I backed away and stammered, “I’m so sorry.”

Culley’s concerned face stared down at me. His hands came to my upper arms, steadying me. “Ryann. Are you all right there sweetheart?”

I shrugged from his touch. “I’m fine. Good night.”

I moved to walk around him, but he side-stepped into my path. “Hold on now. I don’t think you
are
fine. You’ve been crying.”

Noticing the way his gaze wandered down my front, I looked down and snatched my robe back into place. Our collision had apparently knocked it askew, giving him an eyeful of something meant only for my fiancé. Of what he’d just turned down, rather.

Glancing down the hallway in the direction from which I’d just come, Culley’s eyes took on a new gleam. They came back to meet mine. “You know… if you showed up in
my
room looking so utterly tempting… there’s no way in hell I would have sent you away.” 

A loud crack echoed through the hall as my palm met his cheek. I hadn’t meant to slap him. It had just happened. Culley was always flirtatious, but that was just plain mean, and my emotions were all haywire.

“Mind your own business,” I spat out and charged away toward my room, shaking my stinging hand.

Now the tears did flow, breaking through all my control mechanisms. That was just perfect. I was being propositioned by someone who was betrothed to another woman, and I couldn’t get my own fiancé to sleep with me.

Passing a room that served as an overflow pantry, I spotted a tray of full wine glasses. I knew they were intended for the banquet, but no one needed a drink more than I did at the moment. I stepped inside, and peeking around to make sure I wasn’t observed, swiped two of them. One of them was drained before I’d even reached my bedroom door.

The other glass I almost dropped.

Because when I stepped into my room, Lad was waiting for me.