Hollywood Hellraisers (46 page)

It was probably a relief to get behind the camera again, a romantic comedy this time,
As Good As It Gets
(1997), playing one of his most disagreeable characters, a novelist with an almost paralysing obsessivecompulsive disorder. He has phobias about germs, a fixation on tidiness and a nice patter in rudeness, insulting blacks, homosexuals and Jews with equal veracity. He even throws his gay neighbour’s little dog down a garbage chute. Jack was quick to assure people that he was much nicer in real life, but could be just as obnoxious. ‘I rather jump from immaculately polite to violent! There’s not much rudeness in between. Rude is for amateurs.’

Jack has always taken delight in the fact that the public have no real clue as to who the real Jack is behind the shades, behind the grin. He’s cultivated this enigma, this mystery that there are two of him, the person people think he is and the person he actually is. From his interchanges with the public he knows half of them think he’s a raving lunatic, and the other half that he’s a pretty rational guy. ‘You see, I’m real nice, ultra-polite, raised by women. But inside I’m a right cunt.’

With
As Good As It Gets
Jack was back with a tried and tested partner,
Terms of Endearment’
s James L Brooks, a man he loved working with because, ‘I can call him a shit and know that it won’t harm our relationship.’ For his lead Brooks had to think of someone who could play this monster, but not completely turn the audience off, someone who could in the end be loved. ‘Jack was just the only choice.’ And yet he found the role one of his toughest and the early weeks of filming so problem-laden that he quietly took Brooks to one side and said, ‘Look, Jim, if you feel like you’ve got to replace me, don’t worry about it.’ Brooks just laughed; he thought Jack was crazy. And he was right, it was another prize-laden performance. Picking up a Golden Globe Jack told the audience, with a hint of sarcasm, ‘I warned Jim, if I got this, it would give me licence to misbehave for ten more years.’

Perhaps Jack’s anxiety about the role was that at sixty he would be romancing on screen an actress (Helen Hunt) who was twenty-five years his junior. If so, such reticence didn’t extend to his private life, where he was still naturally drawn to younger women, though, as he confessed, ‘I’m pretty old, so almost everyone is a younger woman to me!’ In the end the film won him more fans and plaudits, with the
New York Times
hailing him as the poster boy for older guys who end up in bed with younger women.

The final measure of bravery is to stand up to death.

There’s only one recorded occasion when all four of our bad boys have been at the same place at the same time. This little moment in history took place at the wedding of Sean Penn to Robin Wright in 1996. The ceremony was scheduled to begin at 4 p.m., but one guest hadn’t arrived yet. Marlon Brando. An hour later he turned up, fat, sweating and tipsy, and proceeded to fall asleep in a chair and snore loudly. ‘Not even the loud buzzing of a news helicopter could rouse the dozing don,’ one guest reported.

Marlon slept through the entire ceremony, finally waking up during the toasts. He got up, began to ramble incoherently, even attempt a bit of off-key singing. Jack, alert to the potential embarrassment, took Marlon by the arm and attempted to sit him back down. ‘Thank you very much, Marlon, for those sentiments. I’m sure they were very touching.’ But Marlon wasn’t ready to go quietly. Grabbing Jack’s trousers, he pulled them round his ankles, and in this state Jack finished his toast to the bride and groom. It was Warren and Tim Robbins who restrained Marlon long enough for Jack to pull up his pants. Dennis watched with a wry smile on his face. The whole thing was like something from an insane sitcom.

Jack and Marlon had lived almost next door to each other now for over twenty years. They weren’t the kind of neighbours who popped round much for cups of sugar but were always friends and there for each other if one of them needed help. Jack treasured the conversations they shared, genuinely touched that he was one of the few people Marlon allowed to call him Bud. Jack loved his humour, too. Brando’s favourite holiday was April Fool’s Day, when he could really let rip with practical jokes and pranks. ‘And, trust me, the guy pulled a couple of real crackerjacks at my expense.’

Yeah, she’s a regular Meryl Streep. Her idea of improvisation is putting a dick in her mouth sideways.

Dennis Hopper was now working like a man possessed, a man on a mission, pretty much taking any acting job on offer; his record was eight movies in one year alone (1999). It wasn’t because he was a workaholic. No, he just remembered the years when he sat around and wondered if he’d ever work again.

His quality control was busted, though, that’s for sure; most of the movies were of the straight-to-DVD variety. As he joked himself. ‘I’ve done over a hundred and fifty films, but I think most of them are only shown in Eastern Europe or Fiji or somewhere and they go right to tape.’ Some never even got released. Take 1997’s
The Good Life
, costarring Frank Stallone. When older brother Sly agreed to appear in a cameo role and the producers started promoting the movie as if he were the star, old Rambo sued and the movie never saw daylight.

You can’t make that many films and not strike lucky a few times. In amongst the tripe, with asinine titles like
Lured Innocence
and
Bad City Blues
, was the odd nugget, such as a deliriously sleazy turn in
The Blackout
(1997), from
Driller Killer
director Abel Ferrara. Co-star Matthew Modine, of
Full Metal Jacket
and
Birdy
fame, recalls fondly working with Dennis. ‘I was curious about Hopper because the film we made together was dealing with drugs and alcohol abuse, and I wondered how Dennis would feel about me playing a character that was out of his mind from drugs and booze. I was working with an actor who had, let’s say, a strong understanding of the character I was playing. It was wonderful to be in the scenes with Dennis because there was always a sense of danger. If he said something like, “I’m going to punch you in the face,” there was always the sense that he might actually do it. Fantastic!’

One important role that slipped away from Dennis was the TV reality boss in
The Truman Show
. There are conflicting reports as to exactly what happened, that Dennis walked off the set after just one day’s filming alleging ‘creative differences’, or that he was fired by the producer, who never wanted him anyway. Whatever, Ed Harris came in as a last-minute replacement and went on to win a Golden Globe for best supporting actor and an Oscar nomination. Dennis managed to see the funny side of it.

Everybody just gotta keep fuckin’ everybody ’til they’re all the same colour.

After the lacklustre
Love Affair
Warren Beatty backed off from not only making movies with Annette, but making movies full stop. Annette continued working, establishing herself as an actress of distinction in films like
American Beauty
. The same year she turned forty, and boy must Warren have regretted once quipping: ‘My notion of a wife at forty is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties.’

After a break of four years Warren at last made another film, a pretty good one, too.
Bulworth
(1998) was a biting political satire and one of the most radical American comedies in years with Beatty playing a US senator who speaks politically incorrect truths on sensitive issues. Warren claimed that ‘just about everything’ in the movie was likely to offend audiences, which takes pot-shots at blacks, Jews, the rich and Hollywood. He even poked fun at power-mad media moguls, moguls presumably like top Republican contributor Rupert Murdoch, whose 20th Century Fox bankrolled the satire. When executives over at Fox first read the script ‘they thought I was demented’, said Warren. ‘They hated it, though at least they were honest enough to say so.’

Once again Warren’s perfectionism reared its head during filming. According to reports he’d spend hours in the production office hovering over people seated at their computers and micromanaged every aspect of the film. The crew made up a T-shirt that read: ‘I survived Bulworth.’ Another bore the legend – ‘I worked on Bulworth and all I got was – (a) an ulcer; (b) psychosis; (c) a migraine; (d) facial tics; (e) all of the above.’

Karyn Rachtman, who produced the film’s musical soundtrack, confessed that Warren is the only person in the business she’s ever hung up the phone on. ‘He really works you hard. He would say things like, “I’m trying to figure out what your ulterior motive is.” It was like, “Warren, I don’t have one.” He just wears you out, but he really gets the best out of people. Everything’s very important to him; there was nothing that was just a throwaway. He’s tough and brutal, but there’s an element of charm about it. He gets his way.’

Karyn had been specifically brought to the project to assemble a stellar talent pool of rappers and hip-hop artists. ‘Warren made it clear to me that he wanted the most hardcore and controversial rappers, the biggest names, the smartest, just get them all. He wanted the film to have real street cred.’ So Karyn got the likes of Dr Dre, Wyclef Jean, Ol’ Dirty Bastard, Ice Cube and Chuck D. It was an odd sight to see Warren, then over fifty, hanging out with these musical bruisers. Far from seeing him as an old wrinkly has-been the rappers dug Warren: he was Dick Tracy, Clyde Barrow, Bugsy Siegel, shit he’d fucked Madonna! ‘The fact Warren had been with all these women was a big thing to these guys,’ says Karyn.

As for Warren, he enjoyed dipping his toe into that culture and sincerely respected the art form, seeing these rappers as street poets almost and their songs the music of social protest. ‘It was very important to him that he got their respect,’ says Karyn. ‘And twice a week he’d have a dinner party at his house and invite some of the rappers over, and it would be just the funniest dinner. Annette would be there sometimes, she was cool and the kids were crazy and cute. And a lot of the time Warren and these rappers would talk politics. He was really in awe of a lot of them.’ He even tried a rap himself in the film, an unlikely mix used for comic effect. ‘The way to make the rapping mildly amusing is to not be good at it,’ said Warren. ‘I had no trouble not being good at it.’

By using these artists Warren’s hope was that young black kids interested in the hip-hop scene would come and see the movie. Didn’t quite work that way. The audiences were mainly white middle-class liberals, despite all the controversy surrounding its deliberately clichéd view of black ghetto society, seen as brave by many, condescending by some. When black film-maker Spike Lee was asked to comment on
Bulworth
he said: ‘It was just unbelievable to me. Someone who looked like Halle Berry would not be with Warren Beatty – I think that’s his own fantasy.’

Going out on a publicity tour, Warren subjected himself to the Howard Stern radio show. Inevitably the shock jock asked him about his sexual conquests and Warren clammed up. ‘God, you’re a lousy interview,’ Stern said. But
Bulworth
was a movie and a message Warren passionately believed in. ‘Obscenity is not words like cocksucker or motherfucker, it’s the disparity between rich and poor, and the fact that it’s increasing.’ Warren couldn’t give two hoots if he offended people, he never ran for office so Senator Bulworth fulfilled his fantasy of the liberal politician who says exactly what’s on his mind without regard to the consequences. And far from getting him booted out of the Democratic establishment, it ended up with Warren asked to consider running for the presidency. David Letterman thought it a great idea, joking on his TV show, ‘Warren Beatty has vast experience in screwing people and leaving them happy.’ Close friend Garry Shandling advised Warren, ‘If you get elected, make sure you get your name above the title of the country.’

The worm has turned and it is now packing an Uzi.

In the late nineties Jack Nicholson entered the longest sabbatical of his career, four years without making a film, leading to speculation that he might retire. Asked by a female reporter whether he might contemplate retirement, his answer was vintage Jack: ‘I feel you’d miss me, honey.’

His private life, however, was as busy as ever. There was a trip over to Cuba to attend a film festival, along with a three-hour chinwag with Castro. ‘We smoked a few good cigars. He stays up late, like I do.’ Some political commentators back home were severely miffed. For company he’d taken Rebecca, leading to press speculation that the pair were getting back together, only for it to emerge that Jack the Lad was seeing another actress, Lara Flynn Boyle, best known for her role in
Twin Peaks
. They met in 1999 at a film function and struck up an immediate rapport, despite the thirty-odd-year age gap. ‘The whole country has a love affair with Jack. Why can’t I?’ she told reporters. Some say it was Warren’s wife Annette who played matchmaker here, worried that a footloose and fancy-free Jack might encourage hubby to relapse into his old playboy ways.

Jack’s relationship with Lara Flynn again raised the issue of his preference for, let’s say, younger women. Jack made no bones about the fact that he had a ‘sweet spot’ for them, even suggesting that it wasn’t psychological but partly glandular; ‘It has to do with mindlessly continuing the species.’ His remark annoyed more than a few people close to him. ‘I’ve got every woman I know up my ass on this one,’ he told Meryl Streep. ‘Deservedly so, my love!’ she replied.

But marriage seemed about as likely as Steve Guttenberg winning an Oscar. ‘It is difficult to imagine a woman of Boyle’s appetites sitting up there in the hills, sharing muffin recipes with Annette Bening,’ wrote
Talk
magazine. Lara was something of a wild child; according to her exboyfriend, actor David Sherrill, having sex with her, ‘was like trying to jack off a bobcat with a handful of barbed wire. She was too wild for me, bro.’