Hollywood High (18 page)

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Authors: Ni-Ni Simone

BOOK: Hollywood High
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23
Heather
I
hung up the phone with Spencer and fell straight back on my bed, causing my pillows to spill onto the floor. If I could have high-fived myself I would have. I had to say I was quite impressed with my work. I'd torn those Humpty Dumpties down and now all the media kings and gossiping horses couldn't put them back together again. I had to do it. “Ahh, Wu-Wu's in the house!” I dusted my shoulders and popped my invisible collar.
“Heather!” Camille shouted from her bedroom. “I have a headache, what are you doing in there? Shut up! Enough of the Wu-Wu!” She slammed her bedroom door and all I could do was fall out laughing all over again.
“Ahh, Wu-Wu's in the house!”
I reached over on my nightstand for my cell phone. I knew I needed to be rehearsing my lines for my upcoming taping, but this was much more important.
I dialed Rich's number and she picked up on the first ring. “You're so silly, Knox,” she laughed.
Knox? Oh, really?
She continued, “I need to get this. Hello?”
I popped my lips. “Hey, Rich?”
“Who is this?” Rich said as if her lips were curled in disgust.
“Who is this? This is Heather. Now don't act as if you didn't see my name pop up on your screen.”
“No, actually I didn't see your name pop up on my screen. I never made a habit of saving your number. And what do you want? Last I checked you were team Spencer.”
I laughed. This was juicy... so, so juicy.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
“Rich, I'm only calling you out of concern—”
“Concern? For what? Why am I even on your mind? Outside of school and our little daily lunch date, I shouldn't even be a thought—”
“Actually you're not a thought and this is so much bigger than you. The truth of the matter is this is about the clique and the way the media is portraying us. Have you not seen the blogs, or entertainment news? Have you even been on Twitter today? The number one hashtag is ‘Pampered princesses gone wild.' And when you click on it, do you know whose face pops up?”
“Whose?”
“Yours!”
“What?”
“And it's not a good picture! You had on no shoes, your mascara looked like war marks, and those little shiny bracelets on your wrists were not platinum. And what were they? Handcuffs. Squeezed extra tight, making your hands look like they belonged to the Pillsbury Doughgirl.”
“Excuse you?”
“You heard me. Oh and the headline above that pic was R
ICH
M
ONTGOMERY
I
S
J
AILED AND
E
ATING
H
ERSELF TO
D
EATH.
And wait, wait, I just remembered there's another that read C
HUBBY
L
IL
R
ICH
M
ONTGOMERY
C
AN'T
K
EEP A
M
AN
.”
“Oh hell no!”
“Oh hell yes, girlfriend.”
“Clutching pearls!”
“And your big friend, London. The headline with her picture reads: N
EW
Y
ORK
A
MAZON
T
AKES
D
OWN
L.A! Oh and before I forget freaky little Spencer has two million hits on YouTube!”
“What!”
“Yes, she's an overnight sensation. Teen porn star in the making! And I just got off the phone with Spencer and she is a mess over it. Distraught!”
“Good for her!” she said sarcastically.
“No this is good for none of us!”
“None of us? What does this have to do with you? How are you affected by this? Like really?”
“Excuse me, do you really know who I am? I have a reputation to protect. I have over three hundred thousand followers on Twitter I have to keep, endorsements, and I cannot be seen in the papers, the Internet, or anywhere with the three of you bouncing off the walls like you're crazy. I can't have my name next to the headline of: T
HUGS
IN
C
HANEL
, P
EELING
F
ACES
O
FF
! Now you want to know what this has to do with me? Well it seems that your reputation has me looking guilty of something I never even did. So I need your rep to be cleaned up because being associated with you all is bad for my image and my career. Now we either fix this together or I simply put all the blame on you three and let the chips fall where they may!”
“You wouldn't do that!”
“Are you willing to roll the dice?”
Silence.
“Hello, hello?” I said and a few seconds later I heard a click and it was Rich screaming into the phone, “London! London! SOS! Get your jewels, get your glamour on, we have been destroyed!”
I tried to keep my composure by biting down on my bottom lip and trying not to laugh. I felt like I was seconds away from peeing in my pants. I jumped up and started to do a dance.
“Heather!” Camille shouted. But I ignored her, this was feeling too damn good. There was no way I was going to let Camille blow this high. This kind of high you couldn't even buy.
“London,” Rich continued to scream, “I have Heather on the line, too!”
“Heather?” London said confused. “What kinda games. Rich, I don't do—”
“Girl, listen, I know you don't do Heather—”
I interjected, “And Heather doesn't do you.”
“Look, I know you didn't call me to argue.” London said. “Because I'm busy—”
“Shut up, London, and listen!” Rich screamed. “Heather didn't call you. I called you. Heather called me!”
“Why is Heather calling you? Did I miss something? You're doing Heather now?”
“I'ma say this again,” Rich said sounding as if her teeth were clenched. “Shut. Up. We have been annihilated! Dragged like dogs in the media!”
“What!” London screamed. “Dragged. I can't possibly be in the paper again. I've been locked in my room for two days trying to convince my father that I have seen the error of my ways. I cannot be back in the headlines. This is not happening to me! I should've stayed in New York!”
“You're right you should've stayed in New York! Because of you I have been to jail and now the headlines have turned on—”
“You're the one who calls the headlines. You have the media on speed dial! You're the one who sent the video of Spencer macing Heather to your publicist, who in turn sent it all over the world!”
Oh . . . my . . . God . . . Rich
did that? That sneaky witch!
“I resent that, London!” Rich spat. “You're the one who pressed send. You're the one who attacked Co-Co Ming and got me all messed up in this mess! And now I have to find a way to get out of it!”
“Rich—!”
“Would you two be quiet!” I yelled. “And listen!”
“Wait a minute,” Rich said. “Who just said that?”
“It's me. Heather!” I said. “Obviously you two rabid animals have forgotten I was on the phone!”
“Well, you can get off the phone, because London and I can handle this and we don't need you in our business.”
“We sure don't!” London spat.
“You may think you don't need me. But you do, because I have this all recorded.”
London gasped and Rich snapped. “You . . . dirty . . . !”
“I may be dirty but you are the dirtiest of them all. So thank you for all the juicy details because now I will release this call and only the gossiping gods will know what the headlines will read next.”
Click.
Humpty Dumpty had a
great fall
. . . .
I fell back against the bed and roared with laughter.
“Heather!” Camille screamed and banged on the wall. “If I have to come down there it will be a problem. I told you that I have a headache! Now shut up!”
Before I could laugh again and torture Camille's headache even more my phone rang. A smile lit up my face as Rich's number appeared on my screen.
Not even the media kings or the gossiping horses could put them back together again.
Gotcha.
“Hello?” I said innocently.
“Heather?” Rich called out to me.
“Who is this?”
“Oh now you wanna act as if you don't know who this is. I don't have time for your games.”
“And me, either,” London said pissed. “Now get to the point, Rich.”
“I don't even believe I'm about to ask you this, Heather,” Rich said.
“And what would that be?” I asked.
“What do we need to do to fix this?”
“Spencer's at six o'clock and don't be late.”
Click!
I jumped up off the bed and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Who shot ya!”
“HEATHER!”
24
London
T
he minute I disconnected the call with Rich, I started hyperventilating. That whole conversation had me rendered speechless. I felt paralyzed.
This little light of mine...
I'm gonna let it shine...
“Baby, baby . . . you all right?” my Boobie asked, rubbing my back, and feeling my head.
No I'm not all right. I'm about to be put out on the streets.
I broke out in a sweat. The only thing I could see was Daddy kicking in my bedroom door like a madman, taking back all of my designer handbags, shoes, and jewels and tossing the rest of my things out on the lawn. If everything Rich had said was true, I needed to grab my passport and flee the country, pronto. Like right now. And join one of those indigenous tribes over in the South Pacific. My life, as I had known it, was about to be over.
“Baby, baby, baby,” he said again. “What's going on? What happened? You look like you're about to pass out. You need some water? Talk to me. Tell me what's the matter?”
I slowly turned my head, and stared at his nakedness. “I need you to leave.”
He frowned. “What? Leave? Why? Who was that you were on the phone with?”
“Unless you want to go with me, you need to disappear now.”
He looked at me confused. “Where you going? I thought we were gonna lay around in bed all day and chill.”
“Change of plans,” I said, jumping up from the bed, wrapping a sheet around my naked body. “I need to start packing my bags—”
“Yo, hold up. What are you talking about? Pack your bags to go where? You need to calm down because you're not making any sense right now, for real. You're scaring me.”
“Well, you need to be scared. 'Cause if Turner Phillips catches you up in here, we are both going to be tagged and bagged.”
“What? You're talking crazy now. Tagged and bagged? Can you calm down for one minute and explain to me what the hell you are talking about?”
“Calm down? Calm down?!” I screamed, racing into my walk-in closet and frantically pulling clothes out of my island dresser. “Are you serious? I can't calm down. My life is about to end. I don't know what you're going to do, but I gotta get out of here before my father gets his hands on me and kills me. You can stay if you want. But I won't be coming back to claim your body. So you need to get up. Get dressed. And get out!”
He followed behind me. “Look, baby. Calm down, and tell me who was that on the phone and what happened? 'Cause you are really buggin' hard.”
I stopped for a moment, taking a deep breath. “That was Rich. I'm all over the Internet.” He looked at me, waiting for me to elaborate.
“And?”
I recapped the whole conversation, pausing every so often to stuff more clothes and jewels into another travel bag. I screamed, “I got to get out of here! Hollywood is the worst thing that ever happened to me!”
He walked over and grabbed me. “That's not true. Hollywood brought you back to me.”
“Yeah, and now it's about to tear us apart. I gotta run now while I still have both my legs. I am so dead when my father gets wind of all this.”
“Wow,” he said, rubbing his chin. “This is crazy. Slow down. You know what? I'm going with you. I'm not losing you to anything or anyone, ever again. We're gonna bounce outta here together.”
I jumped in his arms and kissed him. “Oh for real, boo. I love you so much.”
He looked me in the eyes. “Wait. They really said that: N
EW
Y
ORK
A
MAZON
T
AKES
D
OWN
L.A.?”
“Yeah, they did. It's horrible.”
He burst out laughing. “Yo, that's hilarious. They got you soundin' like a real gangster-type chick.”
I frowned, pushing him away from me. “Oh, you think this is funny? My life is a joke to you?”
“Nah, you already know what it is. I'm sayin' . . . I know you upset about being plastered all over the Internet, but baby . . . it's not that serious. Sounds like you're making it out to be more than what it is. But if it makes you feel better, you should definitely get up with your girl and go handle ya scandal.”
I punched him in the arm. “This is so not funny. I hate you.”
“No you don't. You know you love me.”
I rolled my eyes.
He cracked up again. “C'mon, baby. It is funny. You know you're not an amazon. So what if that's what they called you. They're just jealous of my baby. Let the media say what they want. You know they're a buncha haters, anyway. Besides, all press is good press.”
I pulled in a deep breath. “Well, tell my daddy that.”
He pulled me into his arms, and said, “Right now I'm your daddy.”
I sucked my teeth. “Boy, you're delusional. You'll never be my daddy.”
He smirked. “Yeah, a'ight. But I will always be your man.” He slapped me on the behind. “Now go get showered. I'll be here when you get back.”
 
“I'ma beat her, I'ma beat her, I'ma beat. Her. Boom. Boom,” Rich chanted over and over as we walked up the circular driveway of Spencer's home.
I pulled her by the arm. “No, you're not. If you go up in that girl's house and get to busting it up all crazy, you are on your own. I don't need any more media attention. I don't need any more cameras flashing in my face. As a matter of fact I'm getting ready to change my whole identity.”
Rich looked at me, putting her hand up to her mouth. “Clutching pearls. Are you getting ready to go into the Witness Protection Program or something? Do you think they'll have room for me?”
“Girl, what are you talking about? I'm getting far away from you. You have brought me down with all of your media shenanigans. I can't deal with you anymore. I'm tired. I'm done. It's over. Now we're going to go in here, we're gonna handle these two hoes. You're gonna act right. You're gonna keep your hands to yourself. . . .”
“Hold up. You don't tell me what to do. I'm a lady.”
“You're not a damn lady!” I screamed in her face. “You're a barbarian. A media whore! A thug in Chanel! I'm sick of you!”
“Whaaaat?! How dare you! And you're an amazon!” Rich yelled back. “But they shoulda called you King Kong!” She started beating her chest. “You monster!”
The next thing I knew I had swung my handbag upside Rich's head. And we started fighting, rolling around on the grass, and down the hill, punching and slapping each other. Ripping and clawing at each other's faces and clothes.
I rolled on top of her and yelled, “Let me explain the rules to you!”
She rolled up on me. “You don't explain nothing to me!”
I rolled back on top of her. “You will learn how to act.”
She flipped me over and jumped back on top of me. “You don't tell me what to do, King Kong. You gotta problem, London! You're nothing but trouble! And I'm not gonna tolerate it!”
“Get it off of me!” Before either one of us could do anything else we had rolled all the way down the hill and into the enormous man-made pond. We both screamed at the same time as we hit the water. I flung my arms around wildly trying to gather my bearings, jumping up. I didn't see Rich anywhere. All I saw were large goldfish swimming around my feet. “Rich!” I screamed. “Rich, where are you, girl? Oh God, no. You're not a barbarian. I'm sorry for calling you that. You have a little thug in you, but you're not barbarian. Rich! I didn't know.”
I walked aimlessly through the water calling out for Rich. I was in a state of panic. Then out of nowhere I heard her sputtering, “London! Over here! London!”
I ran over to her. We hugged tightly. “Girl, I thought you had drowned.” I looked at her. And she looked at me. We both screamed at what we looked like. Our clothes were ruined. Our hair was wet, soppy mops. Rich had a lily pad stuck on the side of her head. I felt something flopping around in my bra and screamed. Trying to get it out, I tore open my blouse and yanked up my bra. And a fish popped out. My boobies bounced and shook as I hopped up and down.
Rich and I ran out of the water, screaming and hanging on to each other for dear life. “I'm so sorry, London.”
“I'm sorry too, Rich.”
“We have let them two subpar hoes tear us down to the dogs. We're both better than that. Better than they'll ever be.”
“I know, girl, you're right,” I said as I tucked my breasts back in my bra and tried to fix my blouse. All the buttons were ripped off. I reached over and removed leaves from Rich's hair. “No more. No more.”
Rich and I held hands as she said, “From this moment on, it's you and me against the world, London. Not even the headlines, nor those two dollar trollops can keep us apart. Because for all we know they could be setting us up.”
I had to agree with her. “Mmmhmm. They're jealous. Spencer slept with your man and now she wants to do high tea. Yeah, I smell a setup.”
Rich put a hand up on her hip and rolled her neck. She was the spitting image of her mother. “Well, I tell you what. The first one who even looks like they wanna buck, we're gonna leap up on 'em, body rock 'em and drop 'em.”
“And there you have it,” I said, high-fiving her. “That's how we'll do it. All while keeping it calm and keeping it cute.”

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