Home for Love (20 page)

"I'm glad we'll have this out of the way now, Kate. Everything is set up for you to meet with Marietta and Brenda tomorrow. But that means we have a lot to accomplish today. Your schedule is typed out for you right here. You'll go to Personnel for briefing, and then you'll meet with another client. I'll give you his folder and I'll expect you to know the contents. I won't be standing over you, but I certainly don't want any more slip ups with our clients."

Kate's pen hovered over the contract. Gloria's voice went on relentlessly. "You'll have appointments this afternoon with two of the vice-presidents. Just look interested no matter how much they drone on—we try to keep them as happy as possible. And at seven you'll meet Amelia Bledloe for dinner. She's very influential upstairs, Kate, so of course you'll wear something… suitable."

The pen froze right on the signature line. Kate took a deep, cleansing breath and set the pen down.

After listening to Gloria, she understood. If she signed her name right now, every day of her life she'd be fighting with Gloria over petty details, over bits and pieces of time and expenses typed up on a sheet of paper. That was how it would be. Not a grand and glorious struggle to win Steven's love.

"Is something wrong?" Gloria asked politely. Kate looked at her and saw the brittle wariness underneath Gloria's beauty. Then Kate looked at Steven. His face was carefully expressionless, but he returned her gaze intently. She gave a little shrug.

"I'm thinking," she said. "I need some time to think, that's all." She ignored Gloria's grimace of frustration, sat back in her chair and clasped her hands in her lap. She thought deeply about the reason she had decided to join Far Horizon Enterprises. She had needed so badly to prove something to Steven, to show him that she could triumph in Gloria's world. Perhaps she
could
… but she didn't want that kind of success. It would mean compromising the person she really was. And no matter how much she loved Steven, she could not do that for him.

Kate stood up. If Steven was ever going to love her at all, it would have to be for herself. She didn't belong in Gloria's world, and could no longer pretend that she. did. This was not a declaration of independence from Steven. It was simply a calm, strong ability to look inside herself and know what was right for her. Kate felt that today, for the first time, she had a glimpse of true independence. It was an action, not a reaction.

"I've changed my mind," she said. "You can't have Melrose Designs."

Gloria's face went cold and hard. "We've bent over backward to accommodate you, Kate. I'm sure you realize that."

"I do. And I'm genuinely sorry to have wasted so much of your time." She picked up her briefcase.

"Just a minute!" Gloria snapped. "You're not going to do this to me, Kate. I've practically kissed the floor for old Marietta because of you!"

"I believe you saw a little profit in it for yourself," Kate said, still calm. "Good day, Gloria."

"I'll sue you for this!"

"Talk to my lawyer."

"Steve, you'd better do something—"

"Sorry, Gloria. My client makes up her own mind." He took Kate's elbow and ushered her to the elevator. The doors glided shut noiselessly and Gloria's outraged face disappeared.

Kate stared at a jade-colored wall. "I know what you must be thinking, Steven. I know how much you disapprove of me right now. But I guess that's just the way it has to be."

Without quite knowing how it happened, she found herself engulfed in his arms. He chuckled. "I'm damn proud of you, Kate Melrose."

"What?"

"Just what I said. I still think you have the worst business habits known to mankind—or womankind, for that matter. But you sure know how to make an exit."

"Steven…" she whispered against his chest, closing her eyes. She reveled in the feel of his arms.

"I didn't mean to railroad you, Kate. When you walked out of there, I realized I'd been pushing you too hard about all this."

"I just wanted to make you…like me," she murmured. "That's not exactly the best way to conduct business."

"Kate, don't you realize by now it doesn't matter
what
you do? You could paint my entire house flaming pink and I still wouldn't be able to resist you."

"Oh, Steven—" She couldn't finish, because his mouth had captured hers. He kissed her thoroughly, holding her tight, and she gave herself up joyously to him. It really was possible. It really was possible to be her own independent self and still have Steven close to her.

The elevator doors slid open. Kate and Steven slowly disentangled. She was in a delicious daze.

"Good morning!" Steven called out cheerfully to several amused faces. "Wonderful day, isn't it?"

Kate smoothed the hair back from her flushed cheeks. Steven put his arm around her and propelled her out of the building. "I really didn't mean to force you into anything with Far Horizon," he said. "It just seemed like such a good idea to me. And you did take the place by storm."

"Well, I've been thinking about some of your other ideas, Steven," she said solemnly, "and you're right. Unless I get control of my finances I could lose the freedom my business gives me. I don't want that to happen, and I want to offer Paula and Max something more, too. The first thing I'm going to do is hire an accountant."

"That's fantastic, Kate! A very sound move. I'll get the names of some good accounting firms for you—"

"Hold on, financial adviser. That's it for today."

"All right," he said, conceding. "This is your day, Katie, your celebration. Where to?"

There were so many possibilities. It didn't matter which one she chose, as long as she was with Steven.

"Fisherman's Wharf," she announced. "That would be perfect. Let's go!"

A red kite sailed high in the bay breeze, and fishing boats rocked lazily in the water. The Golden Gate Bridge rose in fiery color against the clear blue sky; beyond was the softer, dusky hue of the Marin hills. Kate thought it was all incredibly beautiful. Though she knew any view would be beautiful to her today, because she was with Steven.

They wandered past stalls of shrimp and crab, breathing in the pungent odors of ocean air and fish. They bought chunks of sourdough bread and seafood cocktails in paper cups, then stopped to watch a puppet show. It was all about a purple dragon who wanted to be an opera singer but couldn't hold a note. Kate hoped everything would turn out all right and the dragon would have his dream of singing at the Met. Steven kissed her, his lips tasting of lemon and salt.

They came to a display of seashell jewelry, water-colors, handwoven wall hangings. Together they picked out a hanging for the house, striped in shades of apricot and rust.

"For the library," Steven said.

"That's exactly what I was thinking." Kate smiled up at him and got another kiss. Hands clasped, they strolled past more stalls and shops.

"Books," Kate said, spying a low doorway and dragging Steven toward it. "That's what we need, books for all those shelves in the library." Inside the small shop she introduced him to the art of dusting off book covers and carefully opening cracked bindings.

"I used to love
Winnie the Pooh"
she said, sneezing into her bandanna. "And look—
Gulliver's Travels, Jane Eyre
… Here's an author I've never heard of before, but I think we should take all his books. He was very prolific—I like that."

The clerk loaned Kate a big apron to protect her dress as she went squeezing among the grimy shelves. Her pile of books grew to a respectable size, but so far Steven had only decided on one mystery novel. Kate shook her head in disapproval.

"That's not how to shop for books, Steven. You have to get into the spirit of things."

"I made that mistake last time I went shopping with you," he said grimly. He chose one more mystery as his contribution, and watched with a pained expression as the back seat and trunk of the Mercedes filled up with books.

"I love the smell of musty pages," Kate declared. "It promises all those long, satisfying hours of reading. There's nothing quite like it."

Steven coughed and rolled down the window. "Nothing like it," he agreed dryly. They drove up to the house, then carried all the books inside and stacked them wherever they could find an empty space. Kate was glad that she and Steven had the house to themselves. She balanced a copy of
Grimm's Fairy Tales
on the mantel. But today she didn't need any fairy tales. She had her own life. Her own love.

She turned slowly and found Steven watching her from the doorway. At the look in his eyes, her pulse began a slow, sensual beat. She hesitated only a moment, then walked toward him. She would make Steven love her. She had to.

He caught her close, burying his face in her hair. "Kate, maybe I'd better leave right now. I've never seen you look so desirable," he murmured huskily.

"No, Steven," she whispered against his neck. "This is your house, remember? Please don't go."

"Kate, are you sure?"

In answer she lifted her head and claimed his mouth for her own. As she pressed against him, her body ignited with his heat. His hands moved down the length of her back, her hips, caressing her through the silk. With a small, gasping moan she strained closer to him, molding her softness to his strength. Her very soul was inflamed with him.

His kisses grew more demanding, more urgent. Hands twining through the masses of her hair, he arched her face back to his. Her own hands slid down the hard leanness of his back, a rippling response under her fingers. She explored the narrowness of his waist, then moved her hands back up to the breadth of his shoulders.

"Kate…" His breath was as ragged as hers, his eyes dark as he gazed down at her. He lifted her into his arms in one powerful motion. Gasping her surprise, she clung to him, burying her face in his neck. Their hearts beat wildly together. He stood like that for a moment, head bent over hers. Then, arms still tensed beneath her weight, he strode from the room and up the stairs. She wrapped her arms more tightly around his neck and closed her eyes as he mounted each step. Her heart was pounding as if to burst, her breasts crushed against his chest. A moment later he lowered her very gently onto his bed and knelt over her. He smoothed the hair back from her face.

His mouth descended to hers again. His lips bruised hers with sweetness and desire as he turned her body until its entire length was pressed against him. One strong, sure hand moved along her side and his touch burned through the fabric of her dress, but still he wasn't close enough. Kate's blood surged through her veins as he caressed her. She moved so that he could untie the belt at her waist, then draw the loosened dress down over her shoulders.

"You're beautiful… so beautiful," he murmured thickly, his fingers brushing over the smooth, creamy skin of her throat, her shoulders… Her whole body throbbed to him, every nerve exquisitely alive.

"Steven, I love you so much!" The words were out before she could stop them. His hands on her tensed.

"Steven?" she whispered.

"Come away with me, Kate," he said roughly. "Tonight. Tomorrow. Just come away with me."

She buried her head against his shoulder so that he couldn't see her face. "What do you mean, Steven?"

"We can go anywhere you like. I don't know what'll happen, but we can take it one day at a time."

"What will we be? Lovers? Friends?" The words caught in her throat. She closed her eyes tightly.

"Both, Kate. Isn't that enough? Neither of us needs anything more."

"
I
need more, Steven!" she cried from the very depths of her heart. "Please…"

He was silent. She clung to him, willing him to say the words she longed so desperately to hear. Willing him to say he loved her. If he could make that one commitment to her, she'd risk everything—

"I want you so much, Kate."

She closed her eyes even tighter. With one heaving effort she rolled away from him to crouch at the end of the bed. Fingers shaking uncontrollably, she pulled her dress up over her shoulders.

"Darling, what's wrong?" Steven was beside her in an instant, reaching his hands out to her.

"No!" She twisted away from him and backed toward the door, hugging her arms to her chest. Why couldn't he at least say the words even if he didn't mean them? Anything so that she could run back into his arms.

But he said nothing. He stared back at her, his face expressionless. Even in the mellow afternoon light the angles of his jaw and cheekbones were sharpened. He looked harsh and uncompromising.

Kate whirled and stumbled through the hall, down the stairs, and out the door. She looked around frantically for her car, then remembered that Steven had picked her up today. Blast! She ran all the way down to the bus stop, turning to gaze back up the hill. But Steven hadn't followed her.

Late that night Kate huddled in her rocker, wrapped in her flannel robe. She was shivering even though the night wasn't cold. Beside her on a small table of inset porcelain she had propped up the photograph of herself and Steven—locked together in an embrace and yet fighting each other so stubbornly. She stared at the photograph, listening for the telephone to ring. The hours passed in silence.

At last Kate wept, cradling her forehead on her knees. But her racking sobs were no comfort, gave no easing of the deep pain inside her heart.