Home Run: A Novel (21 page)

I’m through feeling like this
.

So he tells himself.

Tired of feeling like this
.

So he tells himself again.

Tired of the sluggish, sickish way his body and skin feel. Tired of forcing himself to get through the aches and the pain. Tired of another day of knowing what came the night before.

Yet the pain goes away, and Cory remains the same.

Another afternoon comes, and the desire with it. He forgets again and ignores it again and decides once again that he doesn’t care about feeling tired. Because he wants the rush. He wants to feel whole again and wants to feel right.

So he takes that first drink and knows he’ll be better.

I’ll stop someday, when life isn’t so stressful
.

So he tells himself.

Chapter Thirty-two

Doubleheader

“Go on. Get.”

He brushed the puppy away, but the little thing kept wanting to lick his hands and bounce around in his lap. Cory had thought it was a great idea when he woke up this morning. Now, after sitting in his motel room for an hour, watching some baseball and getting nice and drunk, he was beginning to realize how stupid the idea had been.

Now I’m stuck with Stubby here.

He wasn’t exactly sure what breed the dog was. It definitely had some beagle and Lab. Maybe some corgi or shepherd as well. For a few moments, Cory thought of interesting name combos the mixtures produced. A lorgi or a bepherd or a corgle.

When it was obvious that the pup wasn’t going to stop harassing him, Cory picked it up and brought its face up to his.

“You look about as sad as I am,” Cory said. “Maybe you do belong to me.”

The puppy began to lick his mouth. Obviously the dog liked the taste of vodka too.

“I’m gonna name you Bull. Because that’s what this whole situation is.”

He sat Bull in his lap, and the puppy turned on its back, then jumped on the side of the bed next to him and began rolling over. Cory wondered if the dog might accidentally pee on the comforter, then thought it didn’t really matter. Nobody would be too bothered. Especially not him.

He drained the small bottle of Absolut Citron and tried not to think too hard about the day.

Karen’s words kept coming back to him. He could see her face and hear her tone.

I’m just me. Banged up and imperfect.

Cory went to get something else from his all-you-can-drink mini-fridge. Every day he’d find something different, like the kid was having fun picking out a variety of alcohol for him. He’d drink the vodka so the kid would get more. Just different brands and flavors.

He cracked open a bottle of beer and then sat on the edge of the bed, watching his team looking awful in the seventh inning. He should be out there with them. He should be anywhere but here.

The puppy’s nose nudged his back. He turned around and took Bull in one hand.

“Maybe you and I can pack up the Ford and then just drive off to Mexico. How’s that sound? Find a little hut and just live on the beach for a few weeks. Or years.”

Bull wiggled free of his grip and bolted back over the bedspread. He seemed perfectly delighted with the idea.

Cory knew he wasn’t going anywhere. All these people and lives he thought he had figured out—he didn’t have a clue. About any of them. Not Emma or Tyler or Clay or Karen or any of them.

The question was whether he wanted to start getting to know them. To start getting to
really
know them. If they’d even let him.

Maybe it was way too late even to try.

Emma was young and stupid once and had believed that love could conquer everything. She hadn’t thought of the future, only of being with him.

Even after realizing she was pregnant, she still believed. She still hoped.

That was the difference between the twenty-two-year-old version of herself and thirty-three-year-old Emma. She wasn’t a fool anymore. She couldn’t allow herself to be. Not with this young man growing up right in front of her.

It had been both an inspiring and a heavy night, attending the Celebrate Recovery meeting with Karen and Clay. It hadn’t been the first time, but she had gone hoping to see Cory. Hoping that perhaps Karen’s words might get through to him. She wasn’t going to try to talk to him about anything. That wasn’t her place. All she wanted was to be seen there, to show that she supported her friend. To show what family was all about.

She looked in on Tyler and saw his light on, so she slipped into his room to turn it off. She noticed the baseball card resting just next to his opened hand.

It was Cory as a rookie, the future so bright and endless. She read the note on the back again.

Proud of you—Coach Cory

For a moment Emma sat on the edge of Tyler’s bed, thinking about this man she didn’t know, picturing this man that part of her still loved.

Love doesn’t go away. Sometimes it’s put in a wooden box and hidden away like other valuable things belonging to you. Sometimes it’s lost and forgotten about and never to be found again. But it doesn’t go away.

Not when love can create something so beautiful and remarkable and amazing.

Emma smiled as she looked at Tyler, then stood up and kissed the sleeping boy on the forehead.

You’re not a cowboy and you don’t ride on a steel horse and you’re definitely not wanted dead or alive. You’re a guy who plays ball. It’s not heroic. You hit balls and catch them. And yeah, there’s more to it, a lot more in fact, but the world simply sees that. The hitting and catching.

There’s no more drama than that.

The cities and the faces and the moments don’t need a soundtrack, don’t fit into some epic adventure.

You’re just that same stupid kid from Okmulgee and always will be.

Chapter Thirty-three

Safe

When he whipped the pickup truck into the parking space at the baseball field, Cory realized he was moving a bit too fast. He rammed on the brakes. Something underneath his seat hit the back of his foot. When he turned off the motor and got out, he realized it was his phone.

It had been a day since he’d lost it. The last few days had all started to feel the same. One bad nightmare. A blanket of haze. Besides coaching the team, nothing else happened. The same repeats of late nights in his motel room. The same groggy mornings with him vowing to stop this party and get on with his life. The same inspiring moments filled with watching the kids playing ball. The same emptiness as he watched them all leave him behind.

Today was another big game with the Roughnecks. As usual, the parking lot and stands were full. Cory turned on his phone and grabbed his gear, then heard the incoming call.

“Hey, Helene,” he said after seeing her name.

“Why aren’t you in a limo right now? Why aren’t you on your way to Tulsa? Any of this ringing a bell?”

He cursed as he realized what she was talking about. “Listen, I can’t leave now. You’ll just have to reschedule.”

“Cory, I’m gonna blow an artery if you just said what I think you just said.”

“I’m not kidding,” he said. “I’m not missing this game. Reschedule it.”

“You’re not missing this interview. They moved a kid up from the Springs, and this kid is
good
, Cory. And guess what? He’s not a pain in the butt. You will not say no.”

“No.”

Cory had seen and heard it all from Helene, and he was tired of it. She wasn’t down here shacked up in a dingy motel room. She didn’t know the first thing about putting family first.

“I’m not missing my son’s game.”

“Your
son
? Is this some kind of party line from
Green Acres
?”

“I have a son, Helene. He’s on the Little League team. I’m his coach.” Cory could see Emma walking up to him. “Gotta go.”

“Everything okay?” Emma said after he hung up on Helene. She had a look of concern on her face.

She’s coming over here because she’s afraid something bad’s going to happen.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I just forgot I had this TV interview scheduled.”

“You should go.”

“No, I already told my agent to forget it. It’s too late. It’s done.”

“Are you sure?” Emma asked. “If you need to go, it’ll be fine. We’ll be okay without you.”

Cory got the bag of bats from the back of the truck and then grabbed his duffel bag. “It’s fine.”

They walked over to the field. As Cory was putting his gear in the dugout, a black limo arrived. It must have been waiting at his motel.

Helene didn’t waste a minute.

A text came through his phone.

GET IN THE CAR
.

Helene didn’t like taking no for an answer. That’s exactly why he had her for an agent. That’s why she was one of the best in the business.

Emma still looked worried. “Doesn’t look too late to me. Seriously, just go.”

Her continued efforts to get him off the field only made Cory more adamant about staying.

“It’s your career,” Emma continued. “Go. Believe it or not, we
will
survive.”

I just love having all these women in my life who believe in me so much.

“I’m not leaving.” He picked up his glove and went out to the field to begin pregame warm-ups with the kids. “We got a game to play.”

Cory glanced back at the limo waiting in the parking lot.

It looked almost as out of place around this field as he did.

The game had an ominous start. A long hit to right field left Wellsey squinting in the sun, trying in vain to hold up his mitt to even attempt a catch. The ball clipped him in the head, sending both Wellsey and his outstretched mitt down.

After Cory ran out to make sure the kid was okay, he couldn’t help thinking that at least this time it wasn’t
his
fault that someone was laid out on the field.

The Roughnecks took the lead in the first inning, but the Bulldogs came back when Carlos managed to get on base and then made it home after a couple of errors by the cocky Roughnecks.

After Coach Pajersky’s son hit a home run in the fourth, Tyler went up to the plate. His stance was fine, but Cory knew he was trying to blast the ball just like Caleb Pajersky had. Stanton was already at second base. Cory tried to give Tyler a signal to just try to make it on base, then he called time.

“Don’t try to make it over the fence,” Cory told him. “Just get the ball over the second basemen.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. There’s a hundred percent chance he won’t catch it. No way. Knock it out there, and you’ll get Stanton home.”

Tyler swung too hard and too fast at the next pitch, then connected with the following one. It didn’t quite go over the second basemen, but it still made it out in right field, bringing home Stanton and tying the game.

As he stood on first base, Tyler glanced over at Cory, who gave him a wink and a grin.

It was the last inning, and Kendricks was up to bat when Cory called for another time to talk to the batter.

The Bulldogs actually looked better than the Roughnecks, and not just because of their new uniforms. Everything was clicking. Cory was trying his best to help them in every way he could, and that included ignoring the waiting limo and Coach Pajersky.

He walked over to Kendricks. He was keeping his eye on Wick, who was on third.

We can actually win this sucker.

“What’s up, Coach?” Kendricks asked.

He was growing to love the sound of that name. “Nice day out, huh?”

“Yeah.” She waited to hear what he wanted.

“Nice breeze,” he said. “How’s your family?”

“Fine?” Now Kendricks was confused. Everybody was watching them while Cory asked these silly questions.

“Pitcher’s nervous, and the second baseman’s got a weak arm. We’re going to shake things up.”

Cory gave her a wink and could see she finally knew what he was talking about.

“Got it,” she said as she returned to bat.

As he walked back over to third base, he noticed the limo pulling away.

Helene was going to be irate. His publicity opportunity was gone.

It didn’t matter. He had a game to win.

Emma found it a bit amusing how freaked out Coach Pajersky looked. Normally he treated games against the Bulldogs as practice sessions. But with the score tied in the bottom of the ninth and a runner on second and two outs to go, the man didn’t just look rattled. He was incensed, his body and face rigid and angry.

“One out,” he yelled at his team. Pajersky never talked without yelling. “Hold the runner. C’mon.”

Emma stood near first base and glanced at the rest of her team. The mood in the dugout was a little different. Stanton made a farting sound with his mouth, making the rest of the kids giggle.

“Stanton,” she called out. “Was that you?”

“I’m trying to fart in a run.”

She didn’t want to laugh, but she couldn’t help the smile spreading on her face. That was like a green light to the kids, who all cracked up.

The levity only seemed to infuriate Pajersky even more.

Emma noticed Cory giving some signals to Wick. The kid gave a slight nod, his eyes wide behind their glasses. Then Kendricks followed suit and gave a nod.

These kids know what to do.

The pitch was solid, and Kendricks edged her bat into the perfect position to fire off the bunt. It seemed to surprise the pitcher, since he didn’t start going for it at first.

“Hold the runner!” Pajersky hollered.

The pitcher turned to Wick, who froze a few steps away from third. Kendricks kept running past Emma and past first, as Caleb suddenly noticed her and heard the shouts of his team to chase her down for the out.

Pajersky’s warning wail was ignored as the pitcher tossed the ball to the second baseman, who began to run toward Kendricks. Wick was sprinting wildly toward home as the second baseman tagged Kendricks.

The second baseman threw the ball toward home. Wick kept running. Then began to slide.

Come on, get in there.

Wick slid right into the catcher, and the umpire’s voice roared across the Little League field.

“
Safe
.”

For a moment Wick looked unconscious, then he slowly stood up and dusted himself off.

Emma saw Cory raising his fist in celebration as he jogged toward home plate, where the Bulldogs were all surrounding Wick and congratulating him.

Wick tried to shrug it off, but everybody knew better. They were laughing and jumping and showing off for the Roughnecks. Coach Pajersky was already heading off the field, obviously not bothering to congratulate the winners.

Emma stood on one side of the jubilant celebration as Cory stood on the other. Cory gave her that never-changing smile.

This time, she gave one back.

It was a nice moment, and she knew it was because of that grinning grown-up boy staring her down.