Home (Running With Alphas Book 7) (2 page)

The frigid morning air hung in front of Taylor as she exhaled. For once, she didn’t mind the cold. Before they had set out for the border—a place Taylor wouldn’t mind if she never went to again—Alder had insisted on helping her to dress.

Loose as they’d been, her old clothes now barely fit her. Not to mention, the light, airy materials that had kept her from losing her mind in the summer heat were now wholly impractical. The dresses had now been retired in favor of stitched animal hides. While less flattering, Taylor couldn’t deny that the soft leather skins were infinitely warmer and comfier. She had also been fitted with a pair of buckskin boots that came almost up to her knees.

She had ridden to the border on Laurel’s back. Convincing her mates to bring her had been no easy feat. Ultimately, she had asserted that Halcyon would seem less hostile if she were there. The odds of them starting a fight with her exposed and vulnerable were slim.

Sarah, however, had not joined them. Over the morning meal, Sarah had admitted that while she wanted badly to go, she wouldn’t argue the point with her mate. Apparently, they had already had a big fight over her coming with him to Halcyon and there were only so many battles she could win.

“Bring her home to me,” Sarah had said, her eyes rimmed with tears. Taylor had readily agreed, though they both knew she would have little control over the events that followed. What happened next was up to the four alphas.

In his wolf form, Hale hung back to pace alongside Taylor and Laurel. Unexpectedly, he had been more opposed to Taylor accompanying them than even Alder. He also seemed to be the most on edge, though Taylor couldn’t fathom why.

Alder and Cain, each adorned in heavy bear furs, made their way out to the center of the border. Silas stood waiting for them, notably alone. Taylor scanned the far side of the divide, spying the Whiteriver wolves threading anxiously between the trees. There was no sign of Snow.

Please
.

Taylor said a silent prayer. They needed this to be over. She needed this to be over. She wanted Alder back, wanted to be able to sleep in her home again, and she wanted to start looking towards the future without the dark cloud of Snow’s abduction hanging over them all.

The three alphas began to speak, but Taylor couldn’t make out anything they were saying. She looked to Hale, hoping to be able to glean something off him, but he merely continued his agitated pacing.

After a few tense moments, Silas raised a hand. Taylor held her breath, only to expel it in a long
whoosh
of air as a slight figure appeared on the far side of the divide.

Snow’s ebony hair and pale skin were unmistakable as she emerged from the trees. Her head was hung low and her hands were clasped tightly in front of her as she approached the alphas. It was hard to assess her condition from a distance, but she appeared well.

Before she could reach the males, Alder rushed forward, taking her into his arms. Involuntary tears sprung to Taylor’s eyes as she saw father and daughter finally reunited. It was over, it was
finally
over.

Cain’s feet remained firmly planted to the ground. His back was to Taylor and the others, but judging by Silas’s stark expression, the older alpha must not have appeared friendly. Although they were the same size, Cain seemed to tower over the younger male. Taylor got the distinct impression that had he been in charge, all of this would have been resolved a lot sooner.

As Alder led Snow back towards Halcyon’s side of the divide, the teen kept looking over her shoulder to where Silas and Cain still faced off. Neither seemed to be speaking, and just as Taylor was wondering why they still stood there, Cain turned away and shifted.

His wolf form was magnificent. The dark brown hair that cascaded down his body in lustrous waves made him seem larger than he was. Long, black claws dung into the earth as he stretched his body out to its full length.

Taylor—and Silas, by all appearances—expected the dark wolf to walk away and rejoin his family. Instead, Cain whipped his powerful body around, raised one front paw, and slashed it across Silas’s face.

It all happened in the span of a breath. Taylor let out a sharp gasp as Silas fell on his hands and knees. Snow gave a shrill scream and tried to run back, but Alder held her to him with a firm arm.

Laurel jerked back and prepared to retreat. Not wanting to miss what happened next, Taylor jumped down from the beta female’s back, landing hard on her feet. The Halcyon pack had formed a dense crowd of onlookers. Before Laurel could grab her, Taylor slipped into the mass of wolves.

Unable to see over the large bodies, she had to push her way to the front, all the while her mind reeling with the possibilities of what she would see. Would Silas fight back? Would Whiteriver join in the fray? Would any hope of peace be shattered? And in that case, why the heck had she left the safety of Laurel’s protection?

Deciding it was too late to turn back, she shouldered her way past the front line. To her relief, no fight seemed to have broken out. In fact, Cain was already making his way back to them, leaving a cowed Silas in his wake.

Remarkably, none of the Whiteriver wolves had come to his defense. While the pack had left the forest to stand at alert on the edge of the divide, they remained still.

From somewhere, Taylor could hear the sound of Snow sobbing. She scanned the area, trying to pinpoint her location, but was distracted when a muzzle latched onto the back of her shirt and lifted her up off the ground.

The wolves parted as Hale carried her away from the frontlines. Taylor grumbled in protest but didn’t bother to struggle.

Hale carried her back to the forest and then set her down. He crouched low, beckoning Taylor to climb onto his back. She served him a glare. He responded by licking her face. The gesture would have been endearing, had his massive tongue not left her face practically drenched in saliva. Judging by the amusement glimmering in his eyes, his intentions had not been wholly pure.

With a sigh, Taylor swatted playfully at his face and climbed onto his back. As he rose to his full height, she leaned down and wrapped her arms around his neck. She stayed like that the rest of the way back, taking comfort in his warmth and familiar smell.

Taylor should have been complexly relaxed. They had Alder’s daughter back and Whiteriver no longer held any leverage over them. While Silas had been assaulted, it had been by Cain, the alpha of a faraway pack. Silas had no grounds—or means—to declare war on Halcyon.

But the sound of Snow’s sobbing, distant, but heart wrenching, reminded Taylor that not everything had been resolved.

“Why the hell did you have to attack him?”

Alder’s loud voice echoed through the passageway. They were heading to the upper chambers where Sarah had retired with Snow, not an hour ago. It was the first time since the border confrontation that Alder had been alone with Cain and thus able to speak his mind.

The attack on Silas had been absolutely unwarranted. Silas had completely capitulated to their demands, even offering them what seemed to be a sincere apology. They’d had Snow back. Although skinny as ever, she was safe and well cared for.

Cain remained resolute. “Perhaps when you are older and have pups of your own, you will understand.”

Alder couldn’t stop himself from growling. “Snow
is
my pup.”

With a dry laugh, Cain said, “If you had a paternal bone in your body, you would have never let her out of your sight.”

“
What
?” Alder barked, rounding on his brother. “I would have never been in this position if you hadn’t lost Snow in the first place.”

Alder back off almost immediately, sensing that he had struck a nerve. Cain was one of the most stubborn males he’d ever known, but one thing Alder had always respected about his older brother was that he always took ownership of his mistakes.

Shoulders falling, Cain admitted, “I tracked them for nearly a week, but there are issues back at Shaderunner that didn’t allow me to follow them. I could tell from the direction they’d gone that they were likely headed towards Halcyon. I was planning to leave as soon as I could.”

Alder ran a hand through his thick hair. “Why the hell would she run off with Caim?”

“Snow and Caim have always been close,” Sarah said, quietly approaching them. She wrapped her arms around her mate, giving him a quick, but intimate hug. “Not to mention, she probably needed her father.”

“
I
am her father,” Cain protested.

For once, Alder didn’t take offense. He could hear the shadow of insecurity in Cain’s voice and had seen firsthand how much his brother loved Snow.

“You both are,” Sarah conceded. “But this is a very confusing time for her. With everything that she’s going through, she probably feels very insecure about who and what she is.”

“What do you mean?” asked Alder.

Sarah began to chew her lip, her trademark signal of indecision. With a resigned nod of her head, she pulled away from her mate and leaned back against the wall.

“She’s not like the rest of them, Alder. She can’t shift and as far as her senses go, she might as well be human. I used to think it was because of how sick she was as a child, but now…I’m not so sure.”

Alder joined her in leaning against the wall. He waited patiently for her to continue.

“From what I can tell, she seems to be going through puberty,” Sarah said. “Last year, she became fertile for the first time.”

It felt as though she had dropped a bucket of ice water over his head. Alder continued to listen, despite feeling oddly detached from his body.

“It only happened once, and when it didn’t happen again we thought maybe it was just a fluke. Then I did some research on wolves. From everything I read, it’s very possible she could have inherited an annual cycle from her wolf ancestry. In a few years, she could very well take a mate, even have pups of her own.”

Alder put a hand over his face, muffling his voice. “How is this happening?”

Sarah leaned her head against his shoulder. “I don’t know, hun. All I do know is that if it has us confused, we can only imagine how confused she is. She needs you now, more than ever…”

Alder dropped his hand as he caught the scent of salt. Tears ran down Sarah’s face. Cain brushed them away with his thumb.

The three of them stood there for a few moments, respecting the gravity of the situation, as well as their need to be a unified force. Sarah was the first to break the silence.

“I think…I think it may be best if Snow stays here for a little while.”

“So she can get abducted again?” Cain grunted.

Sarah gave him a look of censure. “Snow needs all the attention she can get right now. Besides, with the way things are back home, Halcyon may be safer for her at the moment.”

“What’s happening with your pack?” Alder asked.

Cain hesitated before saying, “A coyote pack is trying to encroach on our territory. We’re stronger, but the numbers aren’t in our favor.”

“We can’t stay much longer,” Sarah said softly. “I’m going to spend some time with Snow while I can.”

Alder waited until Sarah was gone before speaking to his brother. “You know I’ll always be here for you. If you need me, I’ll be there to help.”

Cain placed a heavy hand on his shoulder. “If you really want to help me, take care of Snow and Caim.”

Alder arched a brow. “Caim’s here?”

“You do know that you’re not staying here, right?”

Ignoring Hale, Taylor took a deep breath, inhaling the soothing scents of pine, ash, and wood smoke. She was home.

Considering no one had lived there for two months, the cabin was in great condition. There was a noticeable layer of dust on everything and the fireplace was in desperate need of a cleaning, but otherwise it was just as perfect as Taylor remembered.

Grabbing a blanket from her pallet, Taylor stepped onto the porch to air it out. On the side of the house, she could see her spinach garden. Quinn had kept it well-maintained and Taylor made a mental note to figure out how best to preserve the plants through the winter. Now that she’d had a few weeks of eating meat, the spinach no longer seemed quite so unappetizing.

The quail had also been well cared for, though their pen was in desperate need of cleaning. Not keen on handling bird waste with babies on board, she made another mental note to talk Lark into cleaning it out. Not that it would be hard. At this point, Lark would have walked through fire to regain Taylor’s favor. In truth, Taylor held no ill will towards her friend, but she decided it wouldn’t be so bad to have someone at her beck and call for the next few months. Lord knows, her mates always seemed to be busy with something.

She heard Hale step out onto the porch. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw him lean against the wall and fold his arms.

Brightly, she said, “I was thinking we could add a room onto the cabin. That way, there’d be a living room and a bedroom. I also wouldn’t mind a small bathroom.”

Her heart warmed at the thought of a bedroom, fully equipped with a large, fluffy bed, a cozy bearskin rug, and a wooden crib.

Hale refused to let her fantasize. “I told you, you’re not staying here.”

She let out a huff of annoyance. It had been three full days since they had gotten Snow back. Since then, Halcyon had honored their agreement with Silas. For two nights now, Whiteriver had been hunting in the northern areas of the territory. Their new hunting grounds were far from the den and the cabin, and by all accounts relations between the packs were better than ever.

“I just don’t see why I have to keep living in that cave,” Taylor said, not willing to back down.

“It’s a
den
,” Hale said. “And you better get used to it, because you’re not going to live out here in this deathtrap.”

Taylor pursed her lips. “This is a house and that is a cave. I’m a human, not a cavewoman. I’m supposed to live in a house, not a hole in the ground. I need to live somewhere with fresh air and sunlight or I’m going to lose my mind.”

When she was a child, Taylor had been very outdoorsy. More than once, she had imagined herself running from her various foster homes, escaping into the wilderness. Sometimes she would live in trees, other times, in caves. The cave life of her fantasies was nothing like reality. Caves were cold and dark. There was always water dripping somewhere and yet the air was horrendously dry. A few times, she’d nearly fallen down a hole. Other times, she taken a wrong turn and ended up in a room full of bats.

Caves
sucked
.

Hale seemed like he was going to deliver another one of his stubborn retorts, but Taylor beat him to it.

“I’m
not
giving birth to my babies in a cave, Hale.”

That shut him up.

Any time Taylor mentioned anything to do with her pregnancy or impending parenthood, Hale shut up. Whether it was because he didn’t feel it was his place to make decisions or the entire topic bothered him, Taylor didn’t know.

Most days, it hurt her feelings.

Some days, it was downright depressing.

Today, it was a calculated move.

Hanging the blanket on the porch railing, she went back inside to collect another blanket. When she came out, Hale was still leaning against her cabin, looking uncomfortable.

“It’s not only me, you know. Alder isn’t going to let you stay here, either,” he told her.

Taylor gave the blanket a hard shake. “Alder is busy with his daughter. I doubt he’ll even notice where I’m sleeping.”

She cringed, knowing that couldn’t have sounded more bitter had she simultaneously been chewing coffee grounds. Try as she might to hide it, she was jealous of Snow.

Sarah, Cain, and their entourage had left two nights earlier. Taylor’s happiness about Snow’s safe return had been almost immediately dampened by the realization that Snow wasn’t going with them. She was staying—indefinitely—with the Halcyon pack, to bond with her father.

Taylor genuinely liked Snow. There wasn’t much to dislike about the girl. She was sweet, considerate, and seemed to have a good sense of humor. She possessed Alder’s integrity, while also bearing remarkable similarities to Taylor herself, sans a decade. In fact, were Taylor to have a daughter, she would want her to be just like her older sister.

But,
God,
was she jealous of that kid.

Had she not been pregnant, she’d probably be taking a more active role in getting to know Snow and helping her to forge a better a relationship with her father. But, Taylor was pregnant—becoming more so by the day—and more than anything, she wanted Alder to herself.

Alder was the only one of her two mates who was eager to take an active role in her pregnancy. He wanted to spend time with her, to speculate on what their children would look like, to discuss parenting philosophies, and hear reports on how much the babies were moving. But because his days were now divided between his duties as an alpha, personal time with Taylor, and bonding time with his daughter, Taylor was lucky to get a half-hour alone with him each day.

She could understand his priorities from his perspective. Snow was still adjusting to the pack and coping with the lingering trauma of her abduction. Furthermore, Alder had years of lost time to make up for.

On the other hand, Taylor was—so far as he could tell—doing just fine. Her pregnancy was progressing well, she was in good health, and whenever he saw her, she was surrounded by supportive pack mates. By all accounts, she didn’t seem to need him as much as Snow did. And maybe she didn’t. Maybe she was being completely irrational, but she couldn’t help it. Being with Alder felt like a physical need, not unlike eating, sleeping, and breathing. And she was terribly deprived.

Pregnancy, she was finding, was remarkably isolating. It was true that she felt closer to her pack than ever before. Wolves she’d never even met before were now approaching her on a friendly basis, cozying up to her so that they could steal touches of her belly and offer name suggestions.

But while everyone was preoccupied with the miracle that was happening within her, no one knew of her inner turmoil. Her body was changing at an alarming rate. She was uncomfortable more often than not and her sleep was already being cut short by her shrinking bladder.

Emotionally, she was a wreck. Not a day went by that she wasn’t afraid of something. Despite Cammie’s endless string of reassurances, she was extremely worried about her pregnancy and the birth that would follow. She wanted an obstetrician and ultrasounds. She wanted to give birth in a hospital—with drugs. The prospect of unmedicated childbirth hundreds of miles from an ER was terrifying.

And provided she was somehow able to give birth to two perfectly healthy babies, what then? Her biological mother had been absent even during the few years she was physically there. Taylor had only had one foster mother that had been any good, and she’d gone out of her way to ignore and rebuff every attempt Mrs. Smith had made to turn her into a respectable adult. How could Taylor possibly raise not one, but
two
functional people?

Compounding all of her discomforts, worries, and fears was the fact that Alder was the
only
person she could talk to. Telling Glenn about her problems was awkward to say the least, and behind the pleasant facades of her female friends, Taylor could see a deep and unsettling envy. How could she possibly complain about pregnancy and motherhood with women who probably longed for children of their own?

Hale placed a hand on the small of her back, drawing her back into reality. “What’s wrong?”

She looked up as his face, which was uncharacteristically marred with concern. In the past, Hale had been a font of blunt advice. Unfortunately, he was probably the only person less qualified to advise on parenthood than she was.

“I’m a little tired.” She gave him a small smile. “Take a nap with me?”

His eyes brightened and she held a finger up.

“Just a nap.”

His mouth slanted. “I accept your challenge.”

Taylor laughed as he picked her up and hauled her into the cabin. She struggled half-heartedly as he took her to the bed, practically collapsing on top of her. Her resistance only served to excite him and she could feel his hardness against her thigh. Her traitorous body arched into him.

Groaning, Hale moved to her neck. He nipped and sucked at the sensitive skin, lighting a fire across her body. Her hands went to his hair, gripping it tightly between her fingers.

Just as Hale was moving a hand between her thighs, Taylor let out a sharp gasp. He raised his head abruptly, following the direction of her startled gaze to the open door. On the porch, in his customary wolf form, was Caim. His amber eyes were staring at them with detached interest. Taylor was torn between annoyance and embarrassment. Hale had no such ambivalence.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he barked out.

Caim didn’t seem particularly phased by his uncle’s fury. He stared at them for a few more seconds before turning and walking away.

For once, something had dampened Hale’s sex drive. He let out a harsh breath before sitting up and scratching his head. “Why the hell didn’t that kid go back with his parents?”

That was something Taylor was actually privy to.

The morning before she’d left, Sarah had taken Taylor aside. On top of telling her about Snow staying, she’d also explained that Caim most likely wouldn’t be returning with them. With clear reluctance, she had confessed that earlier in the summer, Caim had tried to mate with her.

“I noticed last year that he’d been strange, but I didn’t think anything of it,” Sarah had said. “I became fertile early this year. My youngest stopped nursing in May, and then in June, I was fertile. Cain was away and Caim was helping me to look after the kids.

“We’ve always been so close. It never even occurred to me that… It wasn’t a violent assault. He pressed himself against me and when I didn’t react, he must have assumed it was okay. He kissed me and then I slapped him and that was it.

“It was devastating—for the both of us. I’d raised him from a child, but biologically, I’m not his mom. I think the part of him that’s wolf was just confused. I tried to explain this to Cain, but he kicked Caim out until after the thrall.”

When Caim had finally come home, things weren’t the same. The months that followed were uncomfortable. Caim and Cain fought more than ever before. By the end of the summer, this had culminated in Caim deciding to leave the pack. Snow had gone with him.

“You’re not in any danger,” Sarah had sworn. “He’s confused and he’s trying to figure things out. He and I…we used to be so close and now it’s like we’re strangers. I don’t know if I can ever fix that.”

Sarah, who had previously seemed so mature and wise, now appeared utterly helpless. This time, it had been Taylor who had offered up a hug.

“I’ll keep an eye on him for you,” Taylor had promised.

And there she’d gone again, making promises she couldn’t possibly keep.