Home Sweet Drama (20 page)

There was a great photo of Eric in the outdoor arena. He was riding Luna, the school horse he used for lessons, and they were in midair over a jump. His form was perfect and it made my throat close a little to think about how we used to coach each other and practice together.

“There you are,” Paige said. She pointed to a pic in the middle. I was sitting by myself on a bench by the courtyard, reading something in my English notebook. In the far side of the picture, three girls were clustered together, laughing and smiling. I peered closer at them.

Rachel and her friends.

I looked away from Rachel and my eyes stopped on another picture. Callie and I sitting on a bench in the courtyard with an enormous stack of books between us. I flashed back, remembering that moment when we'd been cramming last minute for midterms. Back when we'd been friends.

I turned away from the wall. “I'm starving. Let's eat.”

Paige and I walked down the green carpet and started
toward the drink table. I kept my eyes on the food table—not wanting to see Eric, Jacob, or Callie if they were already here.

“Did you pick out all of this food?” I asked Paige. “It's fantastic.”

Paige shrugged, smiling. “I chose most of it. The catering staff cooked everything—Geena and I just told them what we wanted.”

Tables were lined from end to end with crystal plates filled with food. There was a table of fun food—pigs in a blanket, mini corn dogs, nachos and cheese, and hamburger sliders. Another table had more sophisticated food—quiches, roast beef and pepper kabobs, shrimp, and a few other different varieties of meats, cheeses, and breads.

I grabbed a green plastic plate—customized with CCA in gold in the center—and got in line. “You know I'm going to have at least one of everything.”

“Me too. Let's get some food and grab drinks.” Paige scanned the room as she took a plate. “I don't see Ryan yet.”

“He'll be here,” I reassured her. “He wants to see you and he's nominated for prince, so don't worry.”

Paige and I filled our plates and poured glasses of
sparkling white grape juice. Paige glanced around the room again and she spun back around to look at me, almost sloshing juice over the side of her glass.

“He's here!” she said. “Ryan's here!”

“Go say hi,” I said. “I'm going to be eating anyway. I'll go find Nicole or someone to hang with for a while.”

Paige stared at me. “You sure? You can totally come over with us.”

“I'm sure. Go.” I gently shoved Paige away from me.

She tossed one last look over her shoulder and I waved her away. I wanted her to spend Homecoming with Ryan. I also didn't want to keep up my fake
Oh, Homecoming rocks!
act much longer. If I wasn't around Paige, then I could relax a little.

One of the guys in my math class was the DJ. He cranked the volume up a notch louder. A pop-rock mix streamed from the speakers and people started dancing in the center of the floor in front of the stage. Ugh. Soon, I'd be on that stage as the winners of the junior royal court were announced.

Ignore it,
I told myself. I walked to the edge of the room and found an empty seat away from the food and drink tables. I hadn't seen Callie, Eric, or Jacob yet, so at least I didn't have to keep an eye on them.

I went for the dessert first and took a bite of my vanilla cupcake with gold frosting.

“Silver.”

I looked up, midbite. Heather stood in front of me.

“I'm going to ditch you right now if you don't wipe that ridiculous frosting off your face,” Heather said. She rolled her blue eyes.

I swiped at my mouth with my napkin. “When did you get here?”

“Just now. Julia and Alison were freaking out because they didn't want to miss one second of it and Alison had a last-minute shoe emergency.”

“What happened?”

Heather sat on the chair beside me. “Her heel broke. She was devastated. As if they were the only pair of shoes she had to wear.”

“Paige had a shoe moment too,” I said. “But I get it. They want to look amazing—they think Homecoming is a big deal.”

“True.” Heather nodded down at her own dark blue halter dress. “I dressed up, but I didn't go crazy.”

“Me either. And it was kind of nice for once not to have that crazy pressure of dressing up and worrying about my date and all that stuff.”

“This is just an annoyance,” Heather said, sighing. “We're here against our will
and
we have to watch girls throw themselves at guys. Like I'd ever do that.”

I looked sideways at her. We'd never talked about boys—only when she'd pretended to go after Jacob.

“Was there someone you wanted to go with?” I asked. I sat back in my chair a little, expecting her to snap at me and tell me it was none of my business.

Heather stared at her hands in her lap, then looked over at me. “I wouldn't have minded if Troy had asked me to go with him.”

I tried not to let my mouth flop open. Heather had a crush
and
she was insecure about it. For once, she didn't have all the answers. She wanted something but didn't know how to go after it.

Total. Shocker.

“Troy's great,” I said, keeping my voice calm. “Does he know you like him?”

Heather shrugged. “I'm not sure. We talk at the stable a lot, but it's always casual conversation about riding. I think he might like me, but I don't know.”

“Maybe you could find out tonight. Get something out of being here. More than whatever your mom got out of it.”

I looked over and saw Troy standing with Andy and a couple of the riders from the seventh-grade intermediate team.

“He's over there,” I said, tipping my chin in his direction.

Heather looked over at Troy. She ran her fingers through her hair and stood. “Back in a sec.”

“Good luck,” I said. I smiled to myself and watched her maneuver through the crowd toward Troy. I finished my food and stood to throw away my plate. I found a trash can near the back of the room and tossed in my plate. When I turned, Jacob stood in front of me—hands in his pockets. He wore black pants, a blazer, and a gray T-shirt. He looked amazing.

I clutched my cup and stared at him.

“You look beautiful,” he said. His voice was soft and his green eyes met mine.

“Thanks,” I said. I was barely able to get out the word. Even though he was single and I wasn't with Eric, it felt wrong to talk to him. But I
so
wanted to. And I hated how confused I felt. If I cared about Callie's feelings like I claimed, I would stay away from Jacob and not even think about us ever being together. But I couldn't stop what I felt—no matter how hard I tried.

“You're going to win,” Jacob said. “There's no way anyone else could be Homecoming princess.”

I shook my head. “But I don't want to be a princess! I just want to get out of here.”

“Because of Callie, Eric, and me.”

I paused, then nodded. “We all have to be onstage together. Every time I see Callie she looks like she wants to kill me. Eric just ignores me—not that he doesn't have every right to. And you—” I caught myself.

“What?”

Jacob stepped closer and I could almost feel his breath on my face. I took a step back.

“Nothing,” I said. “We can't be talking like this. People already think I'm a horrible person who stole my best friend's boyfriend. It's only going to make it worse if they see us talking now.”

“Sasha, you have to know why I broke up with Callie.”

I glanced down at the floor, then back at him. “Why?”

“I couldn't do it, Sash. I couldn't stay with her when I wasn't feeling it. The longer I was with her, the harder it would have been when we finally broke up.”

I squeezed my eyes shut. “I get that—I do. I know you were saving her from more pain later, but it's still hard to see her now.”

“I feel awful that I hurt her. She's a great girl,” Jacob said. “I told her that I was too overwhelmed with school, sports, and everything else to be a good boyfriend. She was hurt, but I know she believed it. She
never
thought it was because of what happened at your party.”

“Are you sure?” I rubbed the back of my neck. “Jacob, I don't want her to ever doubt that what she had with you was real. You were her
first
boyfriend. She has to keep hating me.”

“That's not fair to you,” Jacob said. “She was your best friend and you're taking the blame for what
I
did. You could tell her the truth and be friends again.”

I shook my head. “I can't.”

And I knew the other reason I wasn't saying—I didn't want Jacob to be the bad guy. I cared about him too much to expose what he'd done.

Jacob's eyes searched my face. “If you're not going to try to work things out with Callie, then she can be mad at both of us … together.”

“Jacob.” I wrapped my arms across my chest.

“Sasha.” He said my name in the same tone I'd said his. “I know we can't right now, but you want to eventually.” He paused. “Right?”

“W-we can't,” I said, stumbling over my words. I had
to pull it together or he'd know I was lying. “It would be obvious to Callie that you broke up with her for me and it would
kill
her. We've already done enough to her.”

Jacob put a warm hand on my forearm. “Callie will move on. She'll find another boyfriend. You know she'll be okay. I want
you
to be happy too. And I think I could make you happy. I want to try.”

I froze.

I wanted to tell him yes. Wanted to say that I wanted to try after we waited a while.

“It's not just about Callie,” I said. “I want—I need—to be single. I just made the YENT and I've got to focus.”

I blinked, trying not to cry, and knew I had to go before I changed my mind.

Jacob looked down at his shoes and I glanced over his shoulder.

My eyes connected with someone else's.

25

WHOSE MOVE?

ERIC.

He stared at me, his beautiful brown eyes searching my face. My stomach swirled and, for a second, I was unaware that I was standing just feet away from Jacob.

“What're you staring at?” Jacob asked.

He turned and saw Eric.

Eric's face changed in an instant. It was as if he expected to see me here with Jacob. To see us this close together, even though we weren't doing anything.

I paused—unsure what to do.

Then Rachel appeared by Eric's side. The pretty seventh grader had swept her light brown hair into a twist and her sideswept bangs made her look sophisticated. Rosy
blush complemented her coloring and the light freckles that were sprinkled across her nose.

She looked at me and gave me an odd half wave. I didn't even know how to respond. Before I could, Eric slipped his hand into Rachel's and led her away from Jacob and me. She leaned into him as they walked and I felt a little stab of jealousy. I could never be with Eric—not after what I'd done to him. But seeing him with
Rachel
was harder than I'd thought. She and her group of friends seemed to be more of a presence on campus lately and she was spending more time with the eighth graders than the seventh graders.

I looked back at Jacob, envisioning him walking away hand in hand with another girl. It was more than I could even think about.

“I've got to go,” I mumbled. “See you onstage.”

I walked away from Jacob, losing myself in the crowd. Everyone was dancing to the music and it was easy to hide myself among them. I stayed away from the food and drink tables, where everyone seemed to gather at some point, and mixed in with a group of people I didn't know.

My eyes stopped on Eric and Rachel. They were dancing together and Eric was smiling at her—the smile that
he'd once given me. She gazed adoringly at him. Her friends, back at the drinks table, giggled and whispered.