Homecoming Hero (14 page)

“That's not good enough. I want to hear specifics.”

She fell silent, and then sank onto a wrought-iron bench.

Wolf sat down next to her and took her hand gently in his. “Don't you think I've been paying attention at our survival classes?”

She slid a glance in his direction. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“Your friends have taught me as much as I've taught them, maybe more. A person doesn't go on a mission trip to prove a point. She goes because she's called.”

“I was called.” She snatched her hand free. “To the Middle East.”

Maybe she had been. Maybe. “Tell me the moment you knew for sure.”

She climbed hastily to her feet, spun around and then clutched at the railing behind her. “When Clay died.”

As though a light turned on in his head, Wolf knew exactly what he had to do next. He had to introduce Hailey to local people in need right here in Savannah.

If, after that, Hailey still believed she'd been called to the Middle East, then Wolf wouldn't stand in her way.

Not that he'd let her go over there unprepared. He'd do what he could to protect her, even if it required him climbing on that airplane with her. It would mean a complete change in his own lifestyle, but if that's what it took to keep her safe, then he'd do it.

Of course, there were a lot of “ifs” that still needed to be settled before life-altering decisions had to be made.

Wolf rose and joined her at the railing, stunned that he was actually thinking about giving up. No, not giving up, getting more information for them both. “What are you doing Wednesday morning?”

“Nothing that can't be rescheduled.” Her brows lifted in inquiry. “Why?”

“I want to take you somewhere that might benefit us both.”

“Don't you have to work?”

“Not on Wednesday.” He'd already scheduled the day off in the hopes of finishing his move into the town house. Now he had a different plan in mind. “I'll pick you up at 0900.”

“Where are you planning to take me?”

“Someplace where you can get your hands dirty.”

W
olf found J.T. sitting alone in his office. The pastor was bent over a stack of papers, completely absorbed in his work.

Leaning against the doorjamb, Wolf waited a few beats then broke the silence. “Want to grab some lunch?”

J.T. didn't bother looking up. “I was wondering how long you were going to stand there staring at me.”

“You knew I was here?”

Head still bent, J.T. flashed a quick smile. “You're not exactly light on your feet, soldier.”

Wolf chuckled. “I'll file that information away for later.”

J.T. joined in the laughter. After a moment, he tossed his pen aside and leaned back in his chair, his smile still holding. “Have a seat and tell me what's on your mind.”

Wolf hesitated. He hadn't planned to have this conversation here, in the church, but J.T. must have countless resources a mouse click away in his computer. It made sense to take his friend up on his offer. Except…

J.T. might misunderstand this visit, thinking Wolf had
come for guidance rather than a simple list of homeless shelters and soup kitchens.

Feeling mildly uncomfortable, Wolf lowered himself into one of the two chairs facing J.T.'s desk. His gaze landed on a free-standing marble plaque that looked like a generic paperweight at first glance.

He read aloud the Scripture etched in black calligraphy. “I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying the Gospel of God's grace. Acts 20:24.”

“The senior pastor gave that to me on my first day here,” J.T. explained. “It helps me remember that I'm investing my life in the only thing that matters, in a legacy that will live on after I'm gone.”

Wolf remained silent, holding perfectly still, moving only the tip of his finger across the bold lettering.

He reread the Scripture, trying to comprehend the meaning behind J.T.'s bold remark. “Do you mean spreading the Gospel?”

“Roger that.” J.T. steepled his fingers under his chin and stared at Wolf with a satisfied light in his eyes. “You've come a long way since the first time we met.”

Wolf rubbed his leg absently. He supposed he had, from a certain perspective. There wasn't as much anger in him, nor as much despair. The Dream wasn't coming as often, either. He knew he owed much of his healing to Hailey. In their short acquaintance, she'd softened his hard edges and made him want to be a better man.

That wasn't to say Wolf didn't still feel lost at times. And confused. “I have a long way to go.”

“We all do,” J.T. agreed.

The certainty in the pastor's voice surprised Wolf. “Even you?”

“Especially me.” J.T. stared off into space then gave his head a quick shake. “So, what brought on this sudden offer of lunch? You doing okay, adjusting to life back in the States?”

“I'm getting there.”

Now why had he admitted that? Why hadn't he told J.T. to mind his own business? Like he had every other time the guy had probed too far into his mental state.

Fingers still braced under his chin, J.T. eyed Wolf with a look that was filled with concern yet also held deep understanding. “What can I do to help you, Captain?”

Wolf's gaze darted around the room. The use of his rank was a clear sign of respect on J.T's part, a reminder that they shared a common bond. “Wolf?”

He drummed his fingers on the arms of the chair, still not looking directly at J.T. This wasn't the way the conversation was supposed to go. Wolf had come here to get a list of local homeless shelters. Nothing more.

You could have done that over the phone,
he told himself. Or e-mail.

But he hadn't. He'd sought out J.T. personally, and not just to get the list. He realized that now. Somewhere along the way Wolf had grown to trust J.T., as both a friend and a pastor.

Man up, Wolf. Tell the guy what's really going on.

“Hailey thinks I need to forgive myself for my men's deaths,” he blurted out. “She says the bombing wasn't my fault.”

As soon as the words slipped from his mouth, he wanted to take them back. But it was too late. The truth was out there, hanging in the room like a heavy, invisible shroud of gloom.

To his credit, J.T. didn't react. He simply continued
sitting in his chair, cool, calm, completely laid-back. Oddly enough, the guy's casual posture had Wolf relaxing, too.

“What do you think? Do you agree with her?” J.T. asked.

“I…” He paused to consider the question and not just answer off the top of his head. “I want to agree with her, but I don't know if I can. The guilt.” He squeezed his eyes shut a moment. “Sometimes, it's too much to bear.”

A series of creaks and groans filled the air as J.T. shifted in his chair. The pastor no longer looked calm, but very, very intense. “Yet, you're here now. Talking to me. That's a good thing.”

Wolf wasn't so sure.

J.T. leaned closer, just a fraction more, but enough to make Wolf sit up straighter. “Tell me why you sought me out today.”

Wolf rubbed a hand over his face. “Because I'm tired of feeling like this. I'm tired of shouldering this burden alone.”

“Good.” J.T. nodded. “That's the first step, admitting the problem.”

Wolf should feel pressured. Uncomfortable. He didn't feel either. Instead, he experienced a strange sense of peace now that he'd shared his concerns. “What do I do next?”

J.T. sat back, assuming his casual pose once again. “I'm afraid there's no magic formula. You're already serving here at the church. You're making a difference with a lot of people. That's a start.”

J.T.'s words confused him. “I'm just teaching survival skills.”

“Your classes are serving a purpose for the Kingdom. Keep teaching them.”

“That's all?” It didn't seem enough.

“No. Serving is just the beginning. You might also want to spend time in prayer, read the Word, seek counsel from other Christians.” J.T. leaned forward. “But, Wolf, nothing will help until you give this up to the Lord. Healing starts with surrender.”

Surrender. Wolf balked at the concept. It went against everything he knew as a soldier. But maybe J.T. was right. Maybe he had to give this up to God, rather than agonize over details he couldn't control. The problem was, handling details was what he did best.

Look where that's gotten you.

Wolf shuddered at the thought.

“I want you to listen to me, Captain.” J.T. captured Wolf's gaze with an unyielding glare. “We live in a fallen world. Life here on earth is messy.”

“You think I don't know that?” he growled.

J.T. held his stare, refusing to back down. “Sometimes you can do all the right things and still get a bad outcome.”

To his shame, Wolf felt the pinprick of tears behind his eyelids. He hated this feeling of helplessness. So he lashed out. “Speaking from experience, J.T.?”

The guy didn't even flinch. “Yeah, I am.”

Wolf lowered his gaze, swallowed several times then forced a note of calm in his voice. “I'll take what you've said under advisement.”

“Meaning you didn't hear a word I said.”

“I heard you.” Wolf rose.

J.T. followed suit. “You still want to go to lunch?”

No. But he was no coward. He met J.T.'s gaze and grinned. “As long as we can talk about football.”

Scooting around his desk, J.T. gripped Wolf's shoulder. “I think that can be arranged. You a University of Georgia fan?”

Wolf thought about Hailey's over-the-top reaction at the silent auction. She'd been a little rabid—but kind of cute, too—when she'd lost out on her bid to spend a day with the school's mascot. “I'm becoming one.”

“Good man.”

They headed for the door, but Wolf stopped midway, remembering the initial reason for his visit. “Before we go, I need a list of Savannah's homeless shelters and food banks.”

J.T. looked at him oddly. “Why?”

“I want to take Hailey on a date before she leaves for Haiti.”

“To a homeless shelter?”

“You got a problem with that?”

For a moment, J.T. just stared at him. Then he released a quick laugh. “Not at all.” He went back to his computer. Fingers on the keyboard, he asked, “You need phone numbers and addresses, too?”

“If you have them.”

“Give me a sec.” He moved his mouse around, left-clicked a few times, then typed something on the keyboard. The next thing Wolf heard was the sound of a printer firing up.

J.T grinned. “You're in business, soldier.”

Finally, Wolf thought, something was going his way.

 

At precisely 0900 Wednesday morning, Hailey locked her front door. She turned and caught sight of Wolf coming up her walkway.

She studied him as he approached. He was dressed
in what she was coming to recognize as his civilian uniform. Worn jeans that hung low on his lean hips, a black T-shirt that clung to his muscular chest and a leather jacket that topped off the masculine ensemble rather nicely. The guy was a walking magazine ad for an expensive men's cologne.

Her stomach quivered in reaction.

The Lord had brought Wolf into her life at the worst possible time, under the worst possible circumstances. And yet, she couldn't help but feel blessed he was here with her now.

Of course, she'd be foolish to forget he'd initially sought her out because her brother had asked him to find her. The reality, always in the back of her mind, left Hailey feeling a bit depressed.

Still, she headed down her front steps with a light heart. Drawing closer to him, she caught a whiff of spice and soap that was pure Wolf.

She smiled. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” He dropped his gaze and grinned back. “I see you dressed comfortably.” His smile broadened. “I always did like a woman who could follow orders.”

She tried not to smile at his teasing manner. “Yeah, well, don't get used to it.”

“Wouldn't dream of it.” Still smiling, he pulled her arm through his and steered her toward the heart of downtown.

The sensation of being this near to him, walking arm in arm like a real couple, was incredibly appealing. Hailey found herself snuggling closer. Wolf's grip tightened, just a little, enough to communicate he was enjoying this, as well.

When they passed by his car, Hailey realized she
had no idea where they were going. “We aren't taking Stella?”

“Nope. We're walking.”

Determined to go with the flow and be flexible, Hailey held silent for two entire city blocks. But curiosity got the best of her midway down the third street. “Where are you taking me?”

He laughed. “I knew you wouldn't last the whole way without asking.”

Was she that predictable? Or did he just know her that well? “So…?”

“We're going to the Savannah People's Mission, your town's version of a soup kitchen.” He slanted a challenging look at her. “You've heard of it, right?”

“Sure I have.”

Which was mostly true. Months ago, J.T. had given her a list of all the homeless shelters, soup kitchens and food banks in town. She'd read about the organizations then shoved the paper in the back of her Bible. Not because she was heartless, she told herself quickly, but because she wasn't involved with any of the ministries that would put her in a position to need their names and locations.

But now Wolf was taking her to a soup kitchen, within walking distance of her home. And, despite all her charity work in town, she'd never technically heard of it.

What did that say about her?

They rounded the corner of one of her favorite squares. A tiny grove of camellia bushes ran along the main sidewalk. Such pretty, bold flowers, daring to bloom when others lay dormant. The winter chill couldn't keep them down.

So engrossed with their courageous beauty, it took a
moment for Hailey to realize Wolf had stopped walking. She turned her head and gaped at all the people.

An impossibly long line snaked around a rectangular, nondescript building that stood adjacent to one of the historic churches open for daily tours. However, these people were not tourists. Some were dressed nicer than others, but they all had a look of defeat about them.

How had she driven by this building countless times in her life, but had never known it was a soup kitchen? “This is the Savannah People's Mission?”

Wolf hooked his thumbs through his belt loops. “You've never been here before?”

“No.” And yet the mission was only a handful of blocks from her home.

Why hadn't she known it was so close? Why hadn't she
cared
enough to know?

She drew in a shaky breath.

“Let's go inside,” Wolf suggested. “There's a lot to do before they open the doors for lunch.”

A sudden wave of fear danced a chill up Hailey's spine and she remained frozen in place, unable to move. What if she couldn't help these people? What if they didn't accept her help?

“Come on.” Wolf tugged her toward a side door. “We go in this way.”

“You've been here before?”

“I came yesterday during my lunch hour.”

“You did? Why?”

He lifted a shoulder. “I wanted to check it out before I brought you here.”

He'd put a lot of forethought into this outing.

Gaze still locked with hers, Wolf drew her through the doorway.

The moment they stepped inside the building, a large
black woman gave a whoop and yanked Wolf into a bear hug. “Two days in a row.” She pulled back and beamed at him. “What a blessing you are, my boy.”

Wolf shrugged. “I can't seem to stay away.” He slapped his palm onto his chest. “You've captured my heart, Cora Belle.”

Giggling like a young girl, the large woman waved her spoon at him then caught sight of Hailey. “And who's this pretty thing?”