Homeward Bound (25 page)

"The song's meaning has always been ambiguous. A betrayal is a betrayal. For God's sake, Kate, with the kind of money they're offering, who cares?"

"I do." She threw the papers back at him. Her body trembled with rage. He had no respect for her feelings, her music, or her past. The offer insulted Kelly's memory. "I would not lend my name or my music for ten times that money."

Bill's bloodshot face turned a brighter shade of red. "Maybe you can turn your nose up at that kind of money, but I won't."

"Then you do the commercial, because I not going to. If you've got nothing else to add, please leave."

His thick fingers grasped at her forearm and tightened painfully. "I won't let you kiss off that kind of money. This is what I did all that work for. You owe me."

She swatted his hand away and took a step back. "You? I was the one working sixteen hours a day, Bill. I was the one onstage night after night while you and Rosie sipped French champagne and siphoned off half my earnings as business expenses. And neither one of you saved a cent of what you made. I don't owe you anything. Now, get out."

For one frightening moment she feared Bill's temper. He took a menacing step forward but jerked back quickly when her front door opened wide. As threatened as she felt, she dreaded Jake meeting Bill even more.

Jake eyed the situation, finally resting his gaze on Kate's trembling hand. "Are you all right, Kate?"

"Yes. Bill was just leaving."

Bill grinned, and Kate saw the cruelty in his twisted lips. "Not before you introduce us, Katie."

"Get out of here." Kate regretted the outburst. Bill, who had known her so long, must have sensed she feared an introduction.

He turned towards Jake and offered his hand. "Bill Harris. Kate's agent."

"Jake Callahan."

Kate watched helplessly while Bill took control. "Kate, you should have told me you were involved with someone."

"Leave it, Bill," she warned, but Bill's greed had obviously overshadowed any sense of loyalty he felt towards his ex-client.

"Come on, Kate," Bill said smoothly. "He must be very special for you to put your career on hold to stay here."

Jake, misreading the tension, put an arm around her shoulder. "She's not ready to go back to work."

Bill gave Jake a good-old-boy pat on the back as condescending as it was phony. "Who said anything about work? They just want to use her music. One day in a studio at most for a voice-over."

Jake shrugged. "She's not interested. Have someone else do it."

"Send someone else," Bill repeated incredulously. "Now, that's rich. They aren't willing to pay that kind of money for just anybody. Lord, Kate, you would think he didn't know who you are."

"Shut up, Bill," Kate snarled.

"He doesn't know, does he?" A malicious delight rang in Bill's voice. "I'll admit you always were good at hiding that from people."

"Know what?" Jake asked. The gentle hold he had on her shoulder tightened as she tried to inch away.

Bill rested against the wall and twisted his fingers together, making that annoying cracking sound that sent chills right through her. "Oh, this is good. Imagine the field day the press would have with this, Kate."

Kate took the briefcase from the table and shoved it in Bill's hands. "Take your offer and stick it up your ass. Then check your own contract before you try to blackmail me. You have a gag order forbidding you from talking about me to the press for ten years after the expiration of our contract. You say one word and I'll nail you for every last dime you have."

Bill laughed. "Careful, Kate. Your middle-class roots are showing. What's next? Leather sings 'Old MacDonald's Farm' at the rodeo?"

"Leather?" Jake's confusion spread across his face.

She knew Bill wanted to get back at her for refusing the lucrative offer. She didn't care for herself, but Bill sensed that her only weak point stood right next to her. "Yes, Leather. Wake up and smell the manure, man. You're playing house with one of the hottest rock singers in the country."

Jake's changing expression mirrored her own desolation. Betrayal had never meant more than when she saw it reflected clearly in Jake's face. Make sure you're the one who tells him. Her sister's warning rang clearly in her ears.

She looked away, unable to bear the look of hurt in Jake's eyes. "Get out, Bill, before I call the police."

"I'm going." Bill straightened his suit and headed towards the door. He paused and stared at Jake's stony expression. "You're crazy, Kate. You're throwing away a million dollars for a man who is apparently disgusted by what you do for a living."

As the door slammed behind Bill, Kate braced herself for Jake's anger. He didn't say a word. Like a statue, he remained rock-still, and showed about as much emotion.

"Say something," she pleaded.

"What do you want me to say, Leather?"

His icy voice chilled her to the bone. "Don't call me that."

"Why. That's who you are, isn't it?"

She shook her head. "No, Jake. That's what I do, not who I am."

He swore under his breath. "I am an idiot. Do you want to know how stupid I am, Kate?"

Her heart ached. For him, for herself. "Stop it, Jake."

He grabbed her shoulders and gave her a shake. "I am so stupid that I thought you were the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Only I don't know you at all."

She took a deep breath and tried to control the trembling in her body. "You're the only person who does know me."

"Oh, right. A relationship built on lies."

"I never lied to you."

"You never told me the truth either. You let me hear it from that sanctimonious bastard while he laughed the entire time. I wanted to kill him." He looked at his hands digging into her flesh and dropped them to his sides. "But what's really scary is, I want to hurt you more. Damn it, Kate. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to, but I was afraid. I didn't want to lose you." Emptiness engulfed her. By the way he looked right through her, Kate knew she already had.

"Did you plan to let me go on living in ignorant bliss while you went around the country strutting your stuff night after night?"

"No. I was going to tell you."

"When?" he yelled.

Kate huddled against the wall and dropped her eyes. "When I figured out how to do it without hurting you."

* * * *

Jake raked his fingers through his hair. What a deluded fool he had been. He knew deep down that he'd missed something about her, but he never imagined he could be that blind. "Go back home, Kate."

"This is my home."

"No, it's not. It's a refuge, and I don't want you hiding out here anymore. You can't even deal with what you are; how the hell do you expect me to?"

Jake turned and walked out the door. He had nothing left to say. Apparently Kate had nothing to add in her defense either or she would have tried to stop him.

Jake spent the remainder of the day working in the upper pastures. He blanketed himself in so much self-righteousness that no amount of logic could penetrate. She never once tried to tell him the truth. He recalled every conversation they had about her work, and nowhere had the mention of her stardom come up. Lord, even he, a diehard country music fan, had heard of Leather. Only someone from another planet could fail to recognize the name, if not the woman.

How did she do it? And why? Why put all the time and dedication into a career that by its very nature demands public attention to be successful, and then not announce who she is? The only explanation he could come up with was that she found the entire situation a big joke. She must have gotten a good laugh at the expense of the local people, and him.

Maybe Kate's mother knew what she was doing when she went to court against her daughter. He groaned, disgusted with his own thoughts. No amount of wounded pride would let him get away with thinking that about Kate. No matter what she'd done to him, her love of children in general, and Chloe specifically, was genuine.

He raised a sledgehammer and brought it down on the fence post. Each heavy stroke let out some of his penned-in anger. Why couldn't he hate her? He wanted to. He needed to. Yet he couldn't.

"Hey, Jake. That post is no good in the ground like that." Trevor stopped a fair distance away, waiting for him to lower the hammer. "You and Kate fighting again?"

"It's over, Trevor. She's leaving."

"What did you do this time?"

"Naturally it's my fault? Well, not this time. You don't know about her."

"You mean about Leather?"

Jake felt as if he'd been hit with his sledgehammer. "How long have you known?"

Trevor sat on the fence and hooked his arms behind the top rail. "That day we heard her singing, I knew I recognized more than the song. I knew the voice. I wasn't sure, though, until her sister told me when she was here at Easter."

His own brother had let him make a fool of himself and never once came forward. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"The same reason Kate couldn’t. You didn't want to listen. You still don't."

Jake folded his arms across his chest and glared at his brother. "What does that mean? Neither one of you tried."

Trevor lifted his hand to shade his eyes from the setting sun. "Is she a different person than she was yesterday?"

Jake paused. "Yes."

"No she's not. The only thing that's changed is the way you see her. You knew she was a musician. You knew she was rich. And unless you're a fool, you had to know she was famous in her field."

"She's not rich. She's filthy rich."

Trevor shook his head.
 
A look of pity crossed his face. He drew himself up full height and met Jake's stare. "If you feel that there's something dirty about the way she makes her money, then you're right to tell her to leave. She shouldn't stay here to be judged by the likes of you."

"That's not what I meant," Jake called out to his brother's retreating back.

Trevor halted and turned. "No, but that's what you said. After all the rotten things you did to her, she still forgave you. And do you know why? Because she loves you, unconditionally. But you only choose to love by your rules."

"I never lied."

"I hope that knowledge keeps you warm at night."

Chapter Sixteen

Kate used the tip of her toe to slide the box out of her way. She never imagined she'd be moving again, except next door. Nikki's presence kept her from falling apart completely. Thankfully her sister never said, "I told you so," but Kate had done enough of that on her own.

For the past three days, she couldn't get more than one-word answers out of Jake. He grudgingly allowed Chloe to come by after Kate reminded him that he had told her not to leave without saying good-bye. The angry silence, she could bear. The way he stared through her as if she didn't exist cut her to the heart.

There could never be a normal life for her. For a while she had deceived herself, and perhaps Jake, too, but she had never meant to hurt him. It seemed that no matter how much love she gave, she managed to hurt the people who cared about her.

She prowled around the room as if it were a cage, trying to decide where to go next. Not the geography-- any place would feel like a prison now. Through the front window she caught sight of the top of a tall blond head, and her heart skipped a hopeful beat. Identical or not, Trevor wasn't the Callahan she wanted to see, and her spirits sank again.

She curled up on the sofa and tried to eat the sandwich her sister had made for her. The past few days she'd been running on nothing more than coffee, and Nikki insisted that Kate eat something before they packed the jeep.

"Kate?" Trevor peeked his head in the door and smiled. "Can I come in?"

"Sure. It's your house," she reminded him. No amount of wishing or hoping would change that fact.

"I can't believe you're doing this." He glanced around at the boxes piled in the living room. In only two months she had collected an array of junk.