Hopeless (3 page)

Karen touched his arm. “You don’t have to.”

He chuckled. “I’m not doin’ it for your
benefit, honey.” He had no doubt Victoria’s black belt form would be flawless,
but he hated to see his friend looking so miserable. “I need to make sure she’s
the one.”

Karen looked up at him, looking serious.
“Trust me; she’s the one. You could meet a thousand women and never find
another one like her.”

His gut clenched at her warning. Karen was intuitive.
She had killer instincts about people. In fact, when he was questioning his own
judgement, she was the one he sought out to set him straight. “You really feel
that strongly about her, huh?”

“I’m as sure about this as I was about Lily
bein’ all wrong for you.”

He’d gathered some friends at Jimmy’s so he
could introduce Lily to his core group a few weeks after they started dating,
and Karen pulled him aside before the night was over to tell him not to waste
his time with her. If he’d heeded her warning, he wouldn’t have spent a year of
his life with the wrong woman. “I said it before: I’m lookin’ for a manager,
not a girlfriend. So don’t even think about tryin’ to play matchmaker.”

One of the single mothers seated across the
room looked up from her magazine and smiled when she caught his eye. That was
another one of his rules. He didn’t date the parents of his students. He didn’t
date his adult students.  And he sure as hell didn’t date his employees. Ever. 

Karen sighed as she watched Victoria. “I
can’t believe you’re bein’ so stubborn about this. When I saw her walk through
the door, I damn near peed my pants.”

Jay laughed and another young, attractive
single mom spared him an appreciative glance from beneath her eBook reader. “Oh
yeah? Why?”

“They all looked good on paper, but what
were the odds one of them would be so beautiful?”

“Millions to one,” he muttered. In thirty
years, he’d never met a woman who looked like that.

Karen elbowed him in the ribs. “Then you
admit you’re interested.”

“Any guy with a pulse would have to admit
she’s a gorgeous woman, but I’m not interested in crossin’ any lines with her.”

Karen folded her arms and scowled. “You and
your damn rules. When are you gonna cut loose and have a little fun?”

“I have plenty of fun. I date at least once
or twice a week. I shoot pool or watch a game with the boys at Jimmy’s a couple
of nights a week...”

“You’re just goin’ through the motions and
you know it.” She looked up at him. “When was the last time you were in love? I
mean gut-wrenching, can’t live without her, gotta see her every day or I’ll die
love?”

His college girlfriend, Stacy, but he sure
as hell wouldn’t admit it aloud. “You know I don’t have time for a relationship
right now. Someday, maybe…”

She touched his forearm, prompting him to
look at her. “What if it never happens? What if you spend your whole life buildin’
a successful business, earnin’ the respect of the martial arts community, and
you never find anyone to share your success with?”

He tried to laugh it off, but the sound
died in his throat. He couldn’t make light of Karen’s concern, not when the
same thought had crossed his mind more than once. “If it’s meant to be, it
will.” He shrugged, wishing he could suppress the fear in his voice. “If it’s
not, it won’t.”

“Hey, don’t you want what your dad and Lexi
have, or how about your mom and Derek? Theirs is the kind of love that lasts
forever.”

She was right, he had great examples of
love all around him, yet he couldn’t seem to find the right woman for himself.
He supposed it would help if he was actively looking.

“You don’t want to end up like your
bonehead brother, do you? A different woman every night, and not a brain cell
between them.”

Jay chuckled. “I’m not worried about endin’
up like him.”

His twin brother, Mike, claimed he was
playing the field. He said he didn’t have the time or patience for a serious
relationship, so why should he waste time with women who would expect more than
he could deliver? Jay couldn’t argue with his logic, but it seemed so pointless,
falling into bed with one woman after another just to take the edge off. Jay
was definitely more selective than his brother. He preferred to be in a
committed relationship. It just seemed the women he set his sights on were all
wrong for him.

“You know what your problem is, don’t you?”

“No, but I’m sure you’re gonna tell me.”

“You’re purposely choosin’ the wrong women
because you’re afraid of making a commitment.”

He folded his arms over his chest.
“Bullshit. I’ve had plenty of long-term girlfriends.”

“Yeah, but you knew you’d never marry them,
so there was no risk. You could waste a year or two, get everyone off your back,
and have regular sex without the risk of getting hurt when the relationship
eventually ended.”

He couldn’t deny her claim, but he wouldn’t
give her the satisfaction of acknowledging her statement either, especially
when the smug smile on her face told him she already knew she was right.

“Man, that chick in college really did a
number on you. What was her name again?”

“Stacy.” The mention of her name shouldn’t
still hurt after ten plus years, but he assumed the old saying was true; the
first cut really was the deepest.

“Right. I can’t believe you caught her in
bed with some other dude. Ouch.”

Jay hadn’t allowed himself to think about
that night in a long, long time. He knew Stacy was the reason he still had
trust issues with women. He wouldn’t allow himself to fall for a woman who
could break his heart like she did again. If his relationships were all
superficial, with both parties knowing they’d eventually run their course, no
one would get hurt. “It looks like the kids are gettin’ ready to take a break.
Do me a favor; go see what the lady at the front desk wants.”

“Will do, boss.”

Victoria was wiping the sweat off her forehead
when Jay approached. “Is there a problem?”

He grinned. “No, you were great out there.
I’d like to have someone else take over this class, though. There’s an advanced
brown belt in the back I’d like you to work with for a bit. We have a grading
comin’ up at the end of the month, and I think she can be ready.”

“Sure.”

She fell into step beside him, trying to
ignore the fact he towered over her. Victoria was tall for a woman, and she’d
never felt particularly feminine, but something about this man made her feel
delicate, which was ridiculous, since she could take down most men. Most men…
but not this one. Few martial artists were as skilled as Jay, and if there was
one thing she admired in a man, it was dedication and commitment.

“Brad,” Jay said to the man watching the
reflection of the woman facing the wall-to-wall mirrors. “I’d like you to meet
Victoria. I’m considering her for the management position at the new studio.”

Brad turned to face her and they both
appeared momentarily stunned. “Oh my God, Vicki?” He pulled her into a hug
before swinging her around in a low circle. “I can’t believe it’s really you.”

Jay scowled as he took a step back to avoid
being hit by flying feet. “You two obviously know each other.”

Victoria laughed when Brad placed a noisy
kiss on her cheek. “Yeah, we went to high school together.”

“Man, it seems like a lifetime ago, doesn’t
it, Vic?” Brad set her down, but continued to hold her hands in his. “Would you
believe this little lady was my date to the senior prom? Hey, remember when—”

Jay cleared his throat. “I hate to
interrupt your little reunion, but you have a roomful of students waitin’ on
you, Easton.”

Victoria heard the edge in Jay’s voice.
Apparently, the boss didn’t appreciate his employees fraternizing on his watch.

Brad didn’t seem ready to heed the warning.
“Hey, I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we all go out for a drink after work? I’d
love to catch up.”

“Um, I’m not sure.” Victoria glanced at
Jay, who seemed ready to explode at the slightest provocation. “Can I let you
know later?”

“Come on, it’ll be fun. I know my
girlfriend, Karen, would love to get to know you better.” He looked over at
Jay. “You wanna come, boss?”

Jay’s gaze lingered on Victoria. “I’m game,
if you are.”

Victoria didn’t know how to respond. She
didn’t even know if she had the job yet, and she didn’t want him to feel
obligated to hire her because of her friendship with Brad. “You don’t have to
come. I mean, if you’re too busy…”

Jay smirked. “Is that your not-so-subtle
way of tellin’ me you’d rather I take a pass?”

“No, God, no.” What was wrong with her? She
was offending the man who may be her new boss in his own studio. “I’m sorry; I
just didn’t want you to feel obligated to join us. I’m sure you have better
things to do.”

“Nothin’ comes to mind.”

Brad leaned into kiss her cheek once more.
“Good, it’s settled then. Jimmy’s it is.”

She scrambled, trying to come up with a
viable excuse. It’s not that she didn’t want to catch up with her old friend,
but she didn’t trust herself to string two words together with Jay breathing
down her neck all night. “But I don’t have anything to wear. I wore a dress
here. I just borrowed this uniform from Jay.”

Brad grinned at Jay. “You borrowed it from
Jay
,
huh? It’s been so long since I’ve heard anyone use your name inside this studio,
I almost forgot what it was.”

Victoria felt the heat infusing her cheeks.
When Jay asked her to call him by name in his office, she should have
understood the invitation didn’t extend to the studio. The Grand Master deserved
respect, and she’d clearly over-stepped her bounds. “I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t
mean—”

Jay held up his hand to silence her as he
glared at Brad. “Get out there and finish up the class. We’ll talk about this
later.” He turned toward the student watching the scene play out with obvious
interest. “Sorry, Beth.”

Beth smiled as her eyes zeroed in on his
full lips. “No problem, sir. I didn’t mind waiting. Are you going to be helping
me with my form tonight?”

Victoria barely suppressed the urge to roll
her eyes. Could the woman be any more obvious?

“No.” He gestured toward Victoria.
“Victoria, I’d like you to meet one of my most promising students…” He winked
at Beth, and she practically melted into a hot, gooey mess at his feet. “Beth
Smith.”

Victoria plastered on her best fake smile
and stepped forward to offer the woman her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you,
Beth.”

The woman barely spared her a glance. Of
course, how could she, when all of her attention was fixed on Jay?

“I’m just gonna stand back and observe
tonight. Victoria, I really want you to put Beth through her paces. I want her
to be ready for this belt grading on Friday.”

“I’ve been practicing just like you said,
sir. Two hours every day.” She licked her lips. “And I’m getting real good at
holding my horse stance.” She took a fraction of a step toward him. “I bet I
could last a whole hour.”

Victoria knew holding the stance was one of
the requirements at the black belt grading, but she had a feeling Beth was
implying she had stamina in other areas as well. Victoria waited to see a
flicker of arousal in Jay’s eyes when he looked at the well-endowed redhead.
She was actually hoping to see it. It would make it so much easier if she could
write him off as a womanizer, but he didn’t show even the slightest hint of
interest. Damn him.   

“Good to hear.” He gestured toward the
chair behind them. “You ladies just do your thing. Pretend I’m not even here.”

Like that was possible. The man filled
every room he was in. Even when she’d been trying to give everything she had to
her students in the other room, he kept sneaking into her peripheral vision,
distracting her from her mission.

It took everything in Victoria not to
bellow in frustration when the woman’s eyes continued to drift to Jay’s in the
mirror. “Courtesy bow,” Victoria said sharply. She began to recite the creed,
waiting patiently for Beth to join in.

“Nice job, ladies,” Jay said, when they
were finished. “A couple more sessions and I think you’ll be all set, Beth.”

Beth turned to Jay, beaming so brightly,
Victoria had the urge to protect her eyes from the blinding light. She didn’t
know if Jay would appreciate her dry sense of humor, especially at the expense
of one of his favorite students, so she barely acknowledged either of them as
she made her way back to the dressing room.

“Probably won’t even notice I’m gone,” she
muttered, as she stripped off the borrowed uniform and stepped into the small
shower stall. She knew it shouldn’t bother her to see a woman openly flirting
with Jay. He wasn’t her friend or her boyfriend; hell, he wasn’t even her boss
yet.

Victoria let the hot water pound her skin
as she considered whether she could work with someone that attractive. She
wasn’t a saint. She dated, had regular sex, even a casual boyfriend now and
then, but she didn’t get serious. Ever. She’d learned early on the only person
she could count on was herself.