Hot Cooking Spanker Wanted (12 page)

“
She
was sorry about what she had done and she even thanked me for taking
the time and for caring enough to spank her. After I transferred to a
different school our relationship slowly ended. I found a new
girlfriend. With time she got sassy and mean. I took her over my knee
with the same results. She was a perfect angel after being spanked.
The other guys thought I was so lucky having a beautiful and nice
girlfriend. We found work in two different states. The relationship
ended.

“
After
that I found that all the girls I dated benefited from being taken in
hand. When it was over we parted ways as friends. I haven't had a
girlfriend for about a year now. I was fooling around on the net and
I saw your add and you lived right here. I thought I would just send
you a quick e-mail. I wasn't even sure that you were a woman. I
started worrying about you then already. I could see the types that
would respond to your add. I figured you would get hurt.

“
When
you responded I was a little scared. You wanted a professional. I
studied up and waited for you to show up. I don't think I have ever
been so nervous in all my life as when I waited for you to ring the
bell. I had a feeling about you from the beginning. I want to be part
of your whole life. Not just the bits and pieces that you let me see.
I don't want to hear about ink in your bed as you tell your mother
about it. I want to know when you have pressure from work. I want to
take care of you. I want you to go to your apartment and get all of
your plants and bring them here. I want us to live together. The
thought of you leaving on the 4
^th
is killing me. Please,
say that you will stay.”

Okay,
I was tired, my behind was shining redder than Rudolph's nose, and he
was asking me to be his girlfriend. Something was definitely wrong
here. He was waiting and I just couldn't wrap my head around this.
“What – what would that mean?”

He
was disappointed, I could tell. Was he going to hit me again?

“
It
would mean that we would be together all the time. It would mean that
I wouldn't have to pretend that it's okay when you leave or when I
don't hear anything from you for a couple of days. It would also mean
that I could do more than just lay my arm around you and hold your
hand.”

“
I
see.” I had figured something like that from the get go. “Um, I
need to go home now. I'll just call a taxi. I need some papers or I
can't continue. I'm sorry but I really have to go now.”

I
picked up my laptop and got my things together. I could tell that he
was hurt but the idea of him being my boyfriend was just too – odd.
I was so scared of him sometimes. Now that I knew where the phone
book was I could call a taxi, and I did.

“
Katherine,
please don't go. Just stay. No pressure. I'll be whatever you need me
to be just don't go.”

“
Work.
Deadline. So much to do.” I couldn't meet his eye. I went to the
door to wait for the taxi. “Goodbye,” I said over my shoulder, as
I slipped out the door.

It
felt so good to be home again. I felt like an adult again. I wasn't
afraid that I would say or do anything wrong. This felt better, more
right.

My
neighbor had been watering my plants when I had come in yesterday. We
talked for bit. She was great but she couldn't understand why I
didn't want to stay and sleep with him. I admitted that he would just
be using me for sex. There was no love there.

She
had answered back 'So use him for sex too'.

I
just couldn't be like that or think like that. I was way too prude.
Of course, he would think that I was like that. Ryan had even told me
that his first girlfriend had insisted on spankings before sex. He
associated the two, naturally. He probably thought that I had been
hitting on him from the get go too.

I
grabbed my basket to go shopping again. I also had an envelope ready.
I had written him a thank you note and enclosed two hundred dollars
as compensation for what I had eaten etc...

He
would be mad about that but I decided a clean break would be best.

I
walked the few short blocks to the store. I was constantly looking
over my shoulder. I was afraid of him. I had started something I
couldn't finish. I had used him and we had both gotten hurt but the
idea of having a boyfriend who thought it was his right, even his
duty, to spank me was just so sick.

I
entered the store and looked around. It was more of a convenient
store, but it did have fresh fruits and vegetables. I got some milk,
a head of salad and other little things. I had tried to keep the
basket light but it always ended up too heavy.

I
had the checkout girl help me put the basket on my arm so I could
carry it that way until that got to be too much for me. Then I let it
slip down my arm and into my hand. I walked home as quick as I could.
I hurried up the stairs to my apartment like I was being chased. I
first relaxed when everything had been put away.

This
routine continued on every day. I would force myself to go out and
buy a little something and slowly my refrigerator filled.

He
wrote me about five or six e-mails a day. I read them all. I didn't
answer any. That was more fair to him. I felt my actions had been
clear enough. He wrote of love at first sight, and then he wrote
about putting his feelings to the side, and just helping me with my
problems again.

I
tried to ignore them but I often found myself shaking my head as I
thought about him. I worked day and night to get the chapters
finished and off to my agent. She was happy with me and that is what
mattered most.

On
the first of December I decorated for Christmas. I even baked
Christmas cookies and sang along with Christmas CD's. I loved
Christmas.

I
was having a tough time deciding what to get myself for Christmas
this year. I was torn between a vacation somewhere good or something
for my apartment.

I
felt safe leaving the house now. I had seen no sign of him and was
pretty sure I wouldn't. The only place he might be would be the
hospital on the 4
^th
.

I
was a little tired today and sad. I had reread the book I had written
and sent it to my agent. I wondered what she would say about it.

I
wanted to bake myself some more cookies. That would cheer me up. I
needed a couple more ingredients. I grabbed my basket and took off.

I
chose a meat that I could make for myself tonight and of course if
you ate cookies you needed milk. My mood was extremely good,
Christmastime did that to me. I thanked the sell's clerk and asked
her to help me get my basket on my arm again.

“
Of
course. How long do you have to wear the brace yet?” she asked.

“
If
I'm lucky it could be gone by tomorrow.”

“
I'll
cross my fingers for you,” she answered.

A
strong hand took the handle of my basket. “I'll carry that for you,
Katherine.”

I
looked and saw him standing right beside me. My mouth fell open. The
checkout girl's mouth fell open too as she looked at him. I knew he
was good looking but she was starting to drool.

“
No
thanks, I'm fine. I still haven't healed up completely from the last
time you were chivalrous. You don't have to be – gallant.”

“
I
want to.” He took the basket and went out the door. I followed him
out like a little girl in trouble, who goes with her mad father,
because she knows she has nowhere else to go.

The
girl at the checkout watched him leave too only she was staring at
his backside. I worried more about mine.

He
had moved on a little before he turned to look for me. “I saw you
before when you went in. You came from this direction right?”

“
Umm
– I – I can manage this. You don't have to feel responsible about
this.” I lifted my hand. “I have been taking marvelous care of
myself. Eight hours of sleep, three meals a day. I'm on the right
track.” I was trying to assure him but I didn't think it would
work.

He
set down the basket on the sidewalk. “I understand. You want to get
rid of me. I won't make this hard on you. Just take care of yourself
and please don't go looking for anyone else to – ” he dropped his
voice, “to spank you. They will only hurt you. I don't want that.
The thought of them getting their hands on you.”

He
shook his head. “I love you so much. Please don't do anything like
that. You are a very good person and you don't need to be punished
for anything and I am so sorry if I ever gave you the feeling you
weren't smart because I think you are very smart and very capable of
living your life.” He had tears in his eyes as he turned to go.

I
reached out to him to stop him. “Do you mean that?” I asked him
that as if he had said little green men had landed on the planet, and
they were taking all the women with them. As if it was something so
impossible, that it just couldn't be believed.

“
Of
course, I do. I can't begin to tell you how impressed I was when we
talked about my book. It was like you looked into the characters
souls and that's where you got the information. I think that you are
more than just smart, you're brilliant.”

“
No,”
I wanted to stop him before he continued. “I meant, when you said
you loved me.”

“
Yes,
I was very serious. I love you and I want to marry you and spend the
rest of my life with you.”

“
But
it doesn't make sense.”

“
Why
not?” He was sounding mad again.

“
Because
nobody has ever – ” I looked away from him. “I've got to go
now.”

“
Oh
no, not now. Now that I understand what the problem is, I'm not just
going to let you go. Katherine, I truly do love you. I love you so
much that I even feel like going to your parents house spilling ink
everywhere and telling them off for the way they treated you. For
making you think that you are unlovable, because you're not.”

I
had my head hung, and I was crying something terrible.

He
picked the basket and laid an arm around me. “Let me take you
home.”

I
started walking and he still held me close. I led him to my apartment
building. He whispered that he loved me ever now and again.

Ryan
didn't say anything else. He followed me up the stairs. I unlocked my
door and he stepped in. I could tell that he was impressed.
Especially decked out for Christmas my apartment looked great.

He
went to my kitchen and started unpacking my groceries. “You are
baking cookies for Christmas?”

“
I
like Christmastime better than any other holiday.”

“
Better
than your own birthday?”

“
Oh
yes. We didn't celebrate my birthday much but everyone celebrated
Christmas.”

“
I'd
celebrate your birthday with you if you would have me.”

I
sighed again. “But you only want me because I misled you into
believing that we have the same interests. Someone like you should be
with some other really beautiful person who likes to be spanked.”

“
Wait,
hold on. Firstly do you think you are ugly or something? Because that
isn't true. They ask me about you all the time at my grocery store.
They say 'When are you going to bring your beautiful girlfriend with
again.' I love that they thought I could get someone like you.
Because you are beautiful, smart and so very lovable. And if you said
that I could never spank you again I would respect that even though I
have very strong views about it being my job to take care of my
family, financially, as well as emotionally.”

“
But
as you can see I don't need financial help.”

“
I
just signed a contract that will put me in a better position too. It
could lead to more work if I do my job well. You could quit your job
if you wanted and you wouldn't have to live with the stress like you
did last week.”

“
I
love my job. It would be painful for me to quit. It would be giving
up a major piece of who I am. The biggest piece. I couldn't do that.
I make a lot of people happy with what I do.”

“
You
make me happy just by being near me.” He stepped in front of me and
looked at me awhile before he wrapped his arms around me. He started
to kiss me and I wrapped my arms around him too. We kissed for
several minutes when he pulled away from. “I want to make love with
you right now but I'm afraid that you will think that I only said 'I
love you' so I could.”

I
wasn't sure what to say. My heart was already beating so wildly. “The
thing is this – ”

“
Are
you a virgin?” He was smiling as he asked.

“
Practically.
I had a boyfriend back in college. I wasn't very good at it.”

“
Why
would you say that?”

“
He
said so when he dumped me,” I admitted.

“
That
jerk. He wasn't good in bed and he tried to push it off on you. I
will have a lot of fun teaching you everything you need to know. I
will be so gentle and loving, you will see that the man has the lead
in making love most the time. It is the man's job to pleasure his
wife.”