Authors: Anne Mather
Tags: #Contemporary, #General, #Romance, #Adult, #Single fathers, #Fiction, #Runaway wives
âOhâ' Sara was taken aback. âShe's much better, thanks. She's home again now, of course, but a friend of hers is staying with her.' She paused. âIf it works out, it may become a permanent arrangement.' She paused. âHer friend is a widow, too.'
âSounds like a good idea,' said Matt evenly. âAnd Max?'
âMax?' She swallowed. âI believe he's making good progress. He's still paralysed. I don't think that will change. But his speech is improving.'
âThat's good.'
âYes.' Sara didn't know what else to say, so she took the easy way out. âMy mother asked me to thank you for what you did. She's very grateful. We both are.'
Matt's nostrils flared for a moment. âIt was my pleasure,' he said politely. Then, carelessly, âI expect you've been busy. Dave says you've kept him up to speed on the house. Do you think you'll stay there the full six months?'
I hope not, thought Sara anxiously. Dave Sloan was the doctor whose house Sara was living in. But it was another opening. âHas he been in touch with you? He didn't mention it.'
âWhy would he?' Matt's tone was cooler now. âAs far as Dave is concerned we're just acquaintances. He probably assumes you used to be a patient of mine.'
âAnd was I?' asked Sara, desperate to break through the wall Matt was steadily erecting between them. âWas that all I was to you? Just another specimen for your casebook?'
âDon't be so bloody stupid!'
Matt turned away from her now, whistling for the dogs that had strayed further along the beach. He seemed as far away from her as ever, and in spite of what he'd said she sensed he wished she'd never come here.
Moving until she could see his face again, she touched his arm and was startled when he pulled away from her. He was wearing a sleeveless tee shirt and his skin was chilled beneath her fingers.
âYou're cold,' she said, without thinking, and he looked at her with eyes that were as dark and bruised as hers used to be.
âLook,' he said grimly, âthere was no need for you to come all this way just to thank me for helping you. A phone call would have sufficed.'
âNot for me,' said Sara fiercely. âI wanted to see you again.' She waited a beat. âI thoughtâI hoped you might want to see me, too.'
âI am pleased to see you,' said Matt, but there was no warmth in his voice. âIt's good to know that you've taken control of your life again.'
âIs it?' Sara pressed her lips together. âWhy do I get the
feeling that you don't mean that? What's wrong, Matt? We used to be soâso close. Nowânow you're acting like we're strangers.'
âWe are strangers, Sara,' he said quellingly. âI was there when you needed someone. Don't try and make it into something different. It doesn't work.'
Sara stared at him. âIs that what you think?'
âIt's what I know,' he told her flatly. The dogs were racing towards them now, and he moved to deflect their noisy excitement. âGo find someone else to play with. I'm too old for these games.'
âWhat games?' Sara was trembling. âI think you're mixing me up with someone else.'
Matt glanced over his shoulder. âIt's not me who's doing the mixing,' he said coldly. Then, as the dogs reached him and he grabbed for them, âI just hope you know what you're doing, Sara. Because, God help me, I don't.'
âObviously not.' Sara gulped. âYou clearly have no idea how much courage it took for me to come here.' Turning, she looked up the cliff path through eyes that were virtually blinded with tears. âDon't tell me you don't know why I came,' she added in a muffled voice, âwhen what you really mean is that you hoped you'd seen the last of me!'
She heard his sudden intake of breath a moment before the dogs reached her. Her words had evidently surprised Matt, perhaps causing him to momentarily relax his hold on the animals. Whatever, Sara was suddenly assaulted by two damp squirming bodies whose wet noses and sandy paws showed no respect at all for her or her clothes.
She gasped, staggering back under their exuberance, helpless laughter mingling with her tears. They were so excited, so welcoming, that she wanted to wrap her arms about them and bury her tear-stained face in their soft fur.
Her heel turning on a pebble gave her her wish. Without anything to save her she lost her balance, and the weight of the dogs bore her back onto the sand.
For a moment she was overwhelmed by doggy breath and
licking tongues, and then Matt was hauling them off her, his anger causing even the retrievers to cower away from him.
âGod, I'm sorry,' he apologised, helping her to sit up. âCrazy beasts!' Then he saw the tears on her face. âDid they hurt you?'
Sara shook her head. âNo more than you did,' she said unsteadily, but when she would have got to her feet Matt stopped her.
âDon't say things like that,' he muttered. âHow did I hurt you? All I did was give you time to come to terms with what had happened. And you have.'
Sara looked up at him. âAnd that meansâwhat?'
An expression of weariness crossed Matt's lean face. âYou know what it means.' His tone was bleak. âI asked you how Max was and you told me. You've been to see him, haven't you? Several times. You're thinking of going back to him.'
âNo!' Sara was horrified that he should even think such a thing. âI've been to see him, yes. But that was only aâa courtesy. I don't want to live with him again.' She shivered. âI couldn't.'
Matt's eyes narrowed. âYou don't have to spare my feelings, you know,' he said harshly. âI know how much he thinks of you; how much he wants you back. And it's not as if he's a danger to you any more. You could call the shots any way you chose to play it.'
Sara stared blankly at him. âWhere is all this coming from?' she demanded. âSurely you know, better than anyone, that I'd never go back to Max, however sorry I felt for him? I don't hate him any more, that's true, but I don't have any intention ofâof staying with him. I've got my first set of divorce papers in my bag if you don't believe me.'
Matt sat back on his heels. âBut Rob saidâ'
âYes?' Sara quivered. âWhat did Rob say?'
Matt raked an unsteady hand through his hair. âHe saidâhell, don't blame Rob. He got it from your husband's brother. HugoâHugo told Rob that he's optimistic that you and Maxâ'
âI don't care what Hugo said. There is no me and Max,' declared Sara, uncaring if her words were ungrammatical. She
couldn't take her eyes off Matt. âIs that what you thought? That Max and I were getting back together?'
âIt seemed possible,' said Matt, heaving a sigh. âAfter all, you married him. You must have cared for him once.'
âYou accused me of marrying him for his money,' retorted Sara, blinking back her tears, and Matt shook his head.
âI know you better than that now,' he told her heavily. âDear God, Sara, a man will say anything to protect himself.'
Sara licked a tear from the corner of her mouth. âDid you need protection?' she asked huskily, and Matt's lips took on a rueful curve.
âYou better believe it,' he said, cupping her jaw with one cold hand. His thumb brushed over her lower lip and he bent his head to rescue another tear from her cheek with his tongue. âI think you'd better tell me again why you came here. I don't want to make any more mistakes.'
Sara shivered again, but this time with anticipation, not from fear. âYou know why I came,' she breathed, and Matt blew softly in her ear.
âIndulge me,' he said, his free hand coming to slide the collar of her silk shirt aside so that he could touch her bare shoulder with his lips. âMy confidence is at a pretty low ebb at the moment.'
Sara turned her face against his rough cheek. âDidn't you finish your book?' she asked innocently, and he growled his indignation.
âYou'll have to get it through your head that there are more important things in my life than my writing,' he told her thickly.
âRosie. I know.'
âNot just Rosie,' he said, tilting her face up to his. His fingers caressed the skin below her ears. âWhy did you take so long to come to a decision about us?'
âSo there is an “us”?' Sara whispered, and once again he made a sound of impatience.
âIf you want there to be,' he said at last. âDo you?'
âNeed you ask? And I didn't know if I was doing the right thing by coming here. I've never done anything like this before.' Sara's hands came up to grip his wrists. And when he
continued to just look at her she said unsteadily, âCan't you kiss me? Please! I'm shaking.'
âThat's the cold,' said Matt, but something in her expression seemed to wither whatever control he'd been putting on himself. With a groan of submission he linked his hands behind her neck and pulled her towards him and her wishes were fulfilled when his mouth slanted over hers.
Sara groped for him, her fingers encountering the tight fabric of his tee shirt before tearing it free of his pants and burrowing beneath. His skin was warm and masculine, the muscles taut beneath her hands. As her mouth opened wide beneath the hungry penetration of his tongue her breasts peaked against his chest, and between her legs she felt the liquid proof of her arousal.
Oh, God, she loved him, she thought achingly, lying back and drawing him down on top of her. And although Matt protested that she was going to get sand in her hair, too, she didn't care. This was her moment, this was where she wanted to be, and it was just so heavenly to feel his powerful body crushing hers into the sand.
He kissed her many times, kisses that grew more and more passionate, more and more devastating. She felt drugged with emotion, drugged with the sensual urgency of his mouth. And so weak with longing she didn't think she would ever have the strength to get up.
Matt peeled her shirt away from her breasts and she trembled when he said, âNo bra?'
âI didn't think I needed one,' she whispered in answer, shifting uncontrollably when he took one of the sensitive peaks into his mouth.
âYou didn't,' he said, rolling the taut areola against his tongue before beginning to suck on it strongly. So strongly that she could feel its pull deep down in the pit of her stomach.
When she felt his hand between her legs, her knees trembled. She shouldn't have worn any pants either, she thought dizzily, as his fingers slid beneath the scrap of silk and lace and found the moist core of her. She arched up against his hand, already aching for a fulfilment only he could give her. But she wanted
him, not a replacement, and somehow she managed to push his hand aside.
âMattâ'
But Matt had misunderstood. Bracing himself with his elbows, he lifted himself away from her. âI know,' he said. âI'm going too fast. I'm sorry.'
He would have sunk back onto his knees then, but Sara wouldn't let him. With a groan of frustration she grasped the waistband of his jeans, and before he could stop her she'd released the buckle.
âYou're not leaving me again,' she said tremulously. âI want you, Matt. All of you. Not justânot just an imitation.'
âDammit, Saraâ'
He tried to hold the two sides of his pants together, but Sara had already opened his zip, and she stared at him as she slipped her hand inside and caressed him.
âTell me you don't want me,' she exclaimed, the engorged length of him throbbing in her hand, and Matt was forced to admit defeat.
âOf course I want you,' he admitted, his voice hoarse with emotion. âDear God, Sara, I've wanted you since the first time I touched you. You know that.'
âI do now,' she whispered, her fingers going to the button on her skirt. âHelp me, darling. I want there to be no barriers when you make love to me.'
Matt groaned. âSaraâ'
âYou're not going to refuse me, are you?' she breathed unsteadily, and he closed his eyes against the unconscious provocation she represented.
âWe should go back to the house,' he offered half-heartedly, but she was already easing his jeans over his tight buttocks.
âAnd have Mrs Webb speculating on what we're doing,' murmured Sara softly. âI don't think so. Do you?'
âI can't think any more,' admitted Matt, kicking off his jeans without further protest. He tore his tee shirt over his head as she dispensed with her shirt and used it to make a soft bed for them to lie on. âHereâ¦' He nuzzled her bare shoulder as she attempted to slip out of her skirt and briefs. âLet me.'
When Sara lay back on the sand Matt went with her, and she was tantalised by the roughness of the hair that surrounded his swollen shaft. She wanted to touch him again, but he wouldn't let her.
âI don't want any substitutes either,' he told her, making her blush. He parted her legs to kneel between her thighs. âI just want you. The woman I love.'
He entered her in one sleek sure movement. Sara's muscles expanded and then closed tightly around him, so that he moaned a little at the knowledge that this would not last long.
They were hungry for one another, and in a few regrettably short strokes Sara felt her senses spinning away from her. Seconds later Matt joined her, his release pumping hotly inside her. Matt's seed, she thought dreamily. She hoped that one day she would have Matt's baby. A new life to make her life completeâ¦
T
HEY
didn't get another chance to be alone together until after Rosie had gone to bed that evening.
The little girl had been delighted to see Sara again. She'd spent most of the time since her father and Sara had collected her from school asking how long she was going to stay, whether she had decided to be Rosie's nanny, after all.
âSara's going to live with us,' Matt had told her at last, after he and Sara had decided it was the easiest way of breaking the news of their relationship to the little girl. âShe's not going to be your nanny exactly. She's just going to live here.'
âLike a mummy?' Rosie had asked excitedly, and although Matt had been tempted to say
Exactly like a mummy
, he was afraid of jumping the gun.
But Sara hadn't had any such inhibitions. âWould you mind if I married your father?' she'd enquired softly, and Rosie had hardly hesitated.
âI don't think so.' She'd paused. âCould I call you Mummy?' she'd added. âI've never had a mummy, you see. I think I'd like that.'
âYou can call me anything you like,' Sara had told her gratefully, giving her a hug. âWe're going to be a real family. Would you like that?'
This time Rosie had had no reservations. âYes, please,' she'd said eagerly. âWill you be getting married soon? Can I be your bridesmaid?'
Sara had looked at Matt then, and he hadn't been able to hide his amusement. âWhy not?' he'd answered blandly, and he and his wife-to-be had exchanged a look of complete understanding over his daughter's head.
Mrs Webb hadn't been at all surprised at the outcome, or so she'd said anyway. âI always knew you were sweet on her,' she'd said to Matt, causing him to get a little red-faced at the
backhanded compliment. âI'm very happy for you. I'm sure you'll have a great life together.'
But now Mrs Webb had gone home, Rosie was safely asleep in her own bed, and Sara was getting her first real look at Matt's bedroom.
It was a very masculine room, she thought, but it suited him. It suited her, too, she thought languidly some time later, after Matt had made love to her again. The hangings of rust and gold gave the room a warm ambience, and she was anticipating lots of evenings spent here, either listening to music or watching the television that occupied a carved cabinet at the foot of the bed.
Or making love, she reminded herself, with a delicious sense of completeness. Matt had told her he loved her in so many different ways, and it was difficult now to imagine how empty her life would have been if they'd never met.
But perhaps they would have met one day, she reflected. Hugo did know Rob Marco, after all. It was possible that with one of those quirks of fate they might have met, and fallen in love.
But Max would never have let her go, she remembered, the thought causing her to nestle even closer to Matt's drowsing form. And Matt would never have known what Max had done to her if he hadn't rescued her from the sea. She owed him her life as well as her happiness, she thought fancifully. And that was as it should be.
âAre you happy?' Matt asked suddenly, and she realised his eyes had opened and he was studying her grave expression rather thoughtfully. âYou're not regretting anything, are you?'
âAs if I would,' she breathed, her lips closing on one of his taut nipples. âI love you, Matt. I was just thinking how fate plays tricks on all of us. When Max fell down the stairs I thought my life was over. Little did I know it was just beginning.'
Matt rolled over onto his side so that he could look at her. âI like that analogy,' he said. âI feel the same. Little did I know when you walked round the corner of the barn that I'd found my destiny.'
âYour destiny?' Sara dimpled. âThat's very poetic.'
âI can write poetry, too,' said Matt drily. âIt's just not fit for public consumption, that's all.'
âI bet it is.' Sara's eyes sparkled. âYou don't do anything by halves. Look at the way you handled Max. I was full of admiration.'
Matt gave her an old-fashioned look. âYeah, right.'
âI mean it,' she insisted. âI've never known Max to back down over anything. What did you say to him? Did you psychoanalyse him or something?'
âNothing so dramatic.'
âMatt!'
âOhâwell, I guess I reminded him that I had friends in the media, too. AndâI also told him that I had pictures of you that would look pretty damning on the front pages of the tabloids.'
Sara gasped. âBut you don't. Have pictures of me, I mean.' She paused. âDo you?'
Matt pulled a wry face. âWhat do you think? That I crept into your room at night and took photographs of your naked body?'
âWell, no, butâ'
âHe didn't know it wasn't true,' said Matt flatly. âAnd once you told me about his first wife I realised why my words must have struck home.'
Sara shook her head. âAmazing.'
âYou don't mind?'
âMind?' Sara gazed at him incredulously. âMy darling, I was in bondage and you set me free.'
âNow who's the poet?' he asked, his lips caressing her shoulder, and she gurgled with laughter.
âNot me,' she said firmly. âI'm just a primary school teacher and part-time nanny!'
âAnd the love of my life,' added Matt, his hand suddenly busy elsewhere. âHmm, what was that you said? That I set you free? Well, my darling, do you feel like showing me some gratitude?'
And she did.