House of Paine - A Full Length Bad Boy Novel (15 page)

He was sitting on the couch drinking a beer, dressed only in his basketball shorts when she came in. The only light in the room was from the television, so at first he didn’t think she saw him.

She started to walk by to her room and he said, “What? You shoot me, go to work and you’re not even going to ask how I’m doing?”

She startled and then stopped and turned to face him. He noticed two things. The first was that she looked pissed and not sorry at all about shooting him and the second was that she had a fat lip. He felt himself getting pissed, remembering his brother smacking her upside the head. “Is that from where Alex hit you?” he asked.

“What the fuck do you care?”

“Are you kidding? You don’t get to shoot me with my own gun and then play the bitch.”

“Fuck you! I should have aimed higher.”

He stood up and sat his beer down. “What the fuck is your problem? We were okay…more than okay before all that shit went down this morning.”

“You want to know what happened? You say I don’t have a right to…what was it? Play the bitch. I got bitch slapped by your fucking brother, threatened by your father, my shit is upside down and torn up in that fucking bedroom…I got treated like shit by your little girlfriend Kelsey…Oh and then I got bitch slapped again by the man that murdered my brother. How’s that for a day?”

“Caine hit you?”

That was the only part of all of that he’d really heard. Damien had been pissed at his brother but he knew Alex was only protecting him. He would probably have done the same for his brother…but Caine was another story altogether. The rage that surged inside of him now for Caine was murderous. “What the fuck for?”

“It doesn’t matter. He thought he wasn’t going to get his way. He won…this time,” she said. She was trying to be flippant about it but he could see in her eyes there was a lot more to it. She was such a mixture of attitude, anxiety, grief and fear, all the time. She started to walk away again and he said, “Caine doesn’t know who you are, does he?”

He knew it was a stupid question…if he did, she’d be dead.

It was like he flipped a switch. She turned on him and in two long strides she was in his face. “Stop acting like you give a fuck! Hitting women is only a small part of what you fuckers find acceptable. Your fucking family is as worthless as the Kramer’s. You’re as fucking worthless as the rest of them so stop trying to act like a human being. It’s not working for you. You may not have killed my brother but you’re as guilty as the rest of them by association. If you have any conscience whatsoever at all, you should be ashamed.”

Damien’s switch was thrown then too. Nobody talked to him like that…but that wasn’t even what pissed him off. What pissed him off was that everything she said was true and he knew it. He grabbed her by the shoulders and literally tossed her down onto the couch. Her eyes only registered hate…not fear. Something about that touched him in a place he’d never been touched before. No one ever stood up to them. Everyone was afraid. He saw that look of fear in so many people’s eyes when they saw him and Alex and especially their father…and most of the time, he hated it. This tiny little woman was willing to stand up to them all even after being bitch-slapped by two of them and threatened by the worst of them all.

He bent down over her, still half hoping to provoke the fear in her. It was all he really knew how to do. In a low tone and with gritted teeth, he said, “If you think that I’m happy with my life…that I enjoy being a worthless thug…then you are sorely mistaken. I hate my fucking life. I have hated my fucking life for ten years since I came to this Godforsaken city and got involved with my father. I didn’t have any other fucking choices! Now…I have even less. You don’t have a clue what that is like! You live your safe little life in fucking New Jersey and you act like you know how easy it would be for me to walk away. You have no fucking idea! So maybe you’re the one who shouldn’t go mouthing off about things you know fucking nothing about!”

She hadn’t flinched but she wasn’t trying to get away either. He picked up his beer and downed the rest of it and then in another burst of anger he threw it hard across the room. It crashed into the fire place and shattered.

She still didn’t flinch. She just looked at him like he had gone crazy.

“My mother died when I was nineteen.” His voice softened a little…he couldn’t help it when he talked about her. “She didn’t just die…she was eaten up a little bit at a time by Cancer and I got to watch a piece of her die every day. Those days at the end when I was the only one there to care of her and she was so sick that she forgot my fucking name were the worst. Alex couldn’t handle seeing her like that so it was up to me to take care of her. I kept telling myself…even when she was dying right before my eyes…that there was hope as long as she woke up every day. There wasn’t and she tried to get me to put her in a hospice or nursing home so I didn’t have to watch her go…but she never would have done that to me and I couldn’t do it to her. I used to sit and talk to her all day long sometimes while she was still alert. There was one thing she asked me for every time. She asked me…no, she fucking begged me not to be like him. She told me I was better than that and that once his life touched me I would be tainted by it forever. I told her I never would and at the time I meant it. I didn’t know yet…I just like you, didn’t have a clue. I let her die believing that I was going to be a good person…and now, I have to live with that lie every fucking minute of every fucking day. I don’t need you to tell me what we are. I know!”

He sat down on the couch and took his head in his hands. He ran his fingers roughly through his thick hair. Some days he wanted to fucking pull it all out. He was coming down from his rage now and he was regretting opening up to her. It wasn’t going to help and all it did was make him look weak…like a big fucking pussy. He was actually glad she wasn’t saying anything. There was nothing to say anyways. They sat there in silence for a long time before she finally asked, “Why?”

He looked at her face. She looked like she’d lost some of her anger too. He knew what she was asking but he hadn’t decided whether or not he wanted to continue talking to her about it.

“Why what?”

“Why would you break your promise to her?”

Damien laughed. It came out sounding like a harsh, choking sound. “I told you, I didn’t have a choice.”

“I don’t understand what that means. Is Jackson forcing you to live like this?”

“Wow, you really don’t understand, do you? Yes, he is forcing me. This isn’t the kind of family that you can choose to walk away from. He designs my life…not just some of it, all of it. He dictates where I go and what I do and who I see every fucking minute of every day. I always have to take into consideration whether what I am doing will be acceptable to him or not. Alex and I are just expected to do what we are told. My father respected my mother’s wishes for whatever reason until she died. I’m sure he could have come and taken us by force at any point…maybe she knew too much, I don’t know. I’m just thankful for the time I had with her and the nineteen years I didn’t understand what this family was really about. As soon as she was gone, we were his and there was nothing we could do about it. He’s not interested in us the way a father is supposed to be…not me, anyways. Our only purpose is to make him look good. We’re the “heirs” to his “throne” and he expects…no, he demands that we act accordingly.”

“What about the rest of the family? Doesn’t Jackson have a lot of siblings? Are they all involved in the “family business?”

“Yes. Some of them feel the same way I do…at least I suspect that they do. It’s an unspoken thing. If anyone dared say it aloud….my father would see that as disrespect and the consequences would not be pretty. I suspect my uncle Kevin feels like me sometimes. He’s been forced to do this his entire life, but he’s not as hard-edged as the rest of them. Out of everyone in this family, my uncle Kevin is the only one who ever stood up for me. We just have always clicked. He goes out of his way to check in on me and make sure things are…at least not positively unbearable. If not for him….”

Damien tapered off. He was getting too emotional. He was letting his guard down with her…he’d been taught that could be a fatal mistake. Where Paige was concerned, his family needed to be taken down. He’d be really stupid to hand her any leverage, even if it was to show weakness.

“So you stay…and do the things you do…to save your own ass, basically.” Her voice was thick with sarcasm and after he’d just bared his soul to her, that really pissed him off.

“Fuck you!” he stood up off the couch again. “You don’t get to be judgmental about my life. You have no fucking clue what it’s like. I have to live with the things that I’ve done and seen every day of my life. Worst of all, I have to live knowing that if my mother was still alive, she would be as disgusted with me as you are. So until you’ve lived any life except for the one where you end up with a cushy medical degree you have nothing to say about it.”

She sat quietly for a minute and when she opened her mouth again, the sarcasm was gone. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I’m sorry about your mother. My father died from cancer as well. The rest of it…I don’t understand…but I guess I feel for you, in a way.” Nice, now she was offering him pity.

He laughed again. “I don’t want your pity.”

“Good because I’m not offering it,” the sarcasm was back. He preferred that. It kept him angry. You may have been nineteen when all of this happened, but you’re not nineteen any longer…”

“Once again, fuck you! We’ve more than established that you don’t know a thing about any of this princess.”

“Oh right, I’m a fucking princess. I didn’t lose my father when I was ten years old only to have my mother marry a fucking drug king. I didn’t have to use the money my dead father left me to go to school when I really would have rather had a father and I didn’t have to live through burying my brother who was also my best friend. Sure, I never had anything fucking bad happen to me ever.”

“It’s not the same!” he spat.

She had never been forced to live a life that she despised.

“You’re right, it’s not the same. I rose above it…”

She was insinuating that he was weak again…too weak to take charge of his own life. Once again, Damien snapped.

“Shut the fuck up!” He roared. He lunged at her and at the last minute, she tried to move away. She wasn’t quick enough and he caught her by her wrists and pulled her up off the couch. For a second they just looked at each other, both of them breathing heavily. He hadn’t thought this through. He suddenly wanted to kiss her…ravage her. All that anger had turned into passion. He pushed her back up against the wall. He was rough with her as he did and this time there was a flicker of fear in her eyes. When he realized that was what he’d been looking for, he felt like shit all over again. What kind of man wants to elicit fear in a woman?

“Let go of me you fucking asshole!”

He started to let her go but against his better judgment and her attitude just made him hotter. He leaned his body in against her and covered her mouth with his roughly. He expected her to continue to struggle…but to his surprise he realized that she was kissing him back. He was consumed by a fiery passion…some of it was anger and some of it was the emotional hangover of talking about his mother and some of it was just pure, animal lust. He wanted her and he was glad she seemed to want him too because he didn’t think he was going to be able to stop himself.

When Damien snatched her up off the couch Paige couldn’t breathe for a second. She was going out of her way to make sure he didn’t see any fear in her eyes…but he suddenly looked like he was out of his mind with rage and she had no idea what he was going to do. He pushed her roughly against the wall…and then to her surprise, he kissed her. She was even more surprised to find herself kissing him back…but she decided she’d question herself about that later. There really wasn’t anything to question anyways, this man was the hottest man alive…thug or not. In spite of herself, she was so fucking hot for this guy she felt like she was going to explode.

The kiss itself wasn’t anything like she’d ever experienced before. It wasn’t sweet or soft or romantic…it was angry and it hurt…but it turned her on like crazy. Damien was biting at her mouth and she was giving back as well as she got, sucking his tongue into her mouth and then scraping it with her teeth once she had it there. He was biting her lips and sucking them in between his. She could feel his hot, bare chest pressing into her too and that was just egging her on. When they were arguing, she’d been trying not to look directly at him. A woman would have to be blind or crazy not to want him.

He started tearing at her clothes wildly, ripping off her blouse and then her bra. As soon as they were out of the way, he took a breast in his hand, squeezing and massaging it before she even realized he’d stripped her down. He didn’t bother taking off her skirt. That, he just pushed up around her waist and with a flick of his wrist he tore off the thong she was wearing and tossed it aside. She hadn’t seen him take off his shorts, but as soon as he had her panties were off, his hard cock was sliding inside of her.

“Oh fuck!”

His powerful body was still pressing into her mercilessly, holding her against the wall. He broke the kiss and looked at her face. She could see the raw need in his eyes and it sent a gush of fluid rushing out from between her legs. When he reached down and grabbed her ass, she wrapped her legs around his waist and he held her like that, pumping his massive cock in and out of her. It took her less than a minute to come. She let out a little scream and then her body began to shake like she was having a seizure. She’d never felt anything that intense and she was still in a daze as she realized he was carrying her down the hall to his bedroom. He was walking slowly, still fucking her as they walked. When they made it to the bed he tossed her down onto it roughly. Then he lifted one of her legs up and held it with his hand wrapped around her ankle and slid back into her. He began pumping into her again, hard and fast. He was panting and growling at the same time. He was at a strange angle…almost diagonal to her pussy and the feeling of his big hard cock hitting the wall of her pussy sent waves of shock straight to her brain. Every nerve ending in her body was alive and raw and every part of her body was feeling something…it was all good. He was driving himself into her with a speed and intensity that she’d never experienced and she bucked her hips up to meet him with every thrust. She reached up and grabbed at his shoulders, digging her nails into him and pulling him down into a kiss. It wasn’t so much a kiss as it was an act of once again devouring each other’s mouths like wild animals.