Husband Stay (Husband #2) (25 page)

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Authors: Louise Cusack

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Her shoes, like
mine and Fritha’s, were a compromise between Brittany’s demand for rhinestone
platforms, and something that didn’t look like it belonged on a dance floor—a satin
peep-toe in a color that matched our gown with a high jeweled heel.

That, combined
with the dress, made Louella’s appearance shockingly sexy, and though her
blonde swirling bob and makeup still had the sixties feel that was her
trademark, the rest was…
wow.

“You look gorgeous,”
I added firmly, in case she was nervous about her appearance. Although, Louella
being Louella, she always looked effortlessly confident. I enveloped her in a
careful hug that wouldn’t damage either of our hair or makeup. Then when I’d
pulled back, she nodded her approval of my royal blue silk halter-neck gown.

“Stylish,” she
said, and I thanked Martine for that, at least. The color and cut did suit me.

Fritha was still
standing speechless behind me, so I moved on to the awkward part of the
afternoon.

“Brittany…” I
said, and forced a smile.

I hadn’t seen her in
three years and Jill hadn’t mentioned her, so I’d figured the
Bratgirl
of
our childhood who’d stolen our makeup and clothes shamelessly, hadn’t been
bothering her. Why had she turned up now to spoil Jill’s special moment?

“You look lovely,”
I added, which was an outright lie, but I wasn’t sure what to say about her
scarlet dress with a neckline that speared down past her navel piercing. An
inappropriate amount of fake breasts sat exposed, like oranges under her skin.
She had shadows upon shadows around her eyes and contoured cheeks that were
frighteningly sharp.

It was the
Kardashian school of makeup gone wrong, and her trademark pout was very much in
evidence. I could see that she didn’t believe in my compliment for a second, so
I tacked on, “And how kind of you to come to Jill’s wedding.”

She looked me up
and down with an ugly sneer, then glanced at Fritha dismissively before saying,
“Don’t bother. I won’t be spending any time with you old hags. I’m just here to
scope out the rich guy my sister is marrying.”

Louella glanced at
me with a
don’t rise to the bait
look on her very calm face, then she
smiled at Brittany. “And I’m sure he’ll be impressed by your youth and natural
beauty. Why, he might even leave Jill on the altar and run away with you.”

Fritha snickered
behind me, but Louella gazed calmly at Brittany as though expecting a pleasant
response.

I expected an explosion.

Instead, Brittany
said, “I am younger, and I’ve got bigger tits.” Her insecurity would have been
endearing if she hadn’t been such a stone-cold bitch.

“Not to mention a chipmunk
nose,” Fritha offered from behind me.

I couldn’t stop
myself. A hysterical giggle burst out, and though I hurriedly clamped down on
it, Brittany’s laser blue eyes narrowed dangerously and turned on me.

“Your husband left
you to get better sex. You’ve got nothing to laugh about.”

But surprisingly,
I did laugh. Before Jack, that would have gutted me. Now…it felt like Danny was
so unimportant. I shook my head. “That’s so last week.”

Brat girl’s head
went back, as if she was a snake, rearing up to strike, but in that moment, the
door burst open behind me and Jill said, “
Ange. I need you.

Something was terribly
wrong.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

 

Jogging down
hospital corridors in a blue bridesmaid dress with jeweled high heels in one
hand should have been embarrassing, but I had the bride in her stunning ivory lace
gown power-walking ahead of me. If anyone was going to look crazy, it was Jill.

Her whole back was
exposed to the waist, with two very thin straps at the shoulders holding the
bodice at the front in place. Her gown was a stunning mix of vintage lace and
contemporary silhouette, but none of her guests were going to see that because
we’d taken off before the ceremony could begin.

Much to Louella’s
disapproval.

“Where are they?”
She stopped at the junction of two corridors and I halted beside her, catching
my breath as she looked around, her eyes wide with worry.

“There!” She
pointed, and set off again, running this time.

Delivery suite.

I caught her by
the time we reached the big green double doors, and managed to get in front of
her, holding out my arms. “Wait. Settle!”

She shook her
head. “I have to get in there.” Looking over my shoulder as if she would push
past me.

“Not like this,” I
demanded, and she met my gaze, her own wild and unfocussed. “I’m here to stop
you embarrassing yourself. This. Now.” I pointed at her with my shoes. “This
will embarrass you. Calm down.”

She nodded and
sucked in a breath. “Calm,” she said, although I could see she had no clue how
to achieve that.

“Focus on Lizzie.”
I dropped my shoes so I could grab Jill’s shoulder with my good hand and hold
her attention when she would have looked away. “She’s experiencing pain. She
needs your support. You and Finn are a
team
, here to help her deliver
her
baby—Finn’s niece or nephew. Your Godchild. Have you got that?”

She swallowed so
loudly I could hear it in the quiet corridor. “Her baby.”

“Correct.”

Jill looked
gutted, and I wanted nothing more than to pull her into my arms and say
Poor
Baby
but that wasn’t what she needed right now. Louella would be far more
competent at tough love, but Jill had chosen me, and I wasn’t about to let her
down.

“If Lizzie’s
mother was here,” I said carefully, “She’d be in the room. But she’s not.
That’s why Finn went in the ambulance. To keep Lizzie calm until her wife gets
here.”

Jill nodded in
acknowledgement, but her gaze was vacant as she stared at the doors to the Delivery
suites.

Unfortunately for all
of us, Lizzie’s foster mother was in London, preparing to donate a kidney to
save her brother’s life.

“Circumstances
have conspired,” I went on, “But none of it is bad. Finn is only with Lizzie so
she won’t be alone. They grew up as cousins. It’s only natural that he’d be
with her until her wife arrives.”

Jill nodded, and I
could see some sanity bleeding back in. “They’ve always been close.”

“Like you and
Brittany. Only Lizzie, unlike Brittany, is a human being.”

Jill frowned and
finally met my gaze. “Sorry about Brat. She’s a bitch.”

“Actually, she’s
an overgrown pipsqueak. Louella put her in her place.”

Jill’s smile was
slow to come, but when it arrived, it was genuine. “Good job.”

“Don’t worry about
them,” I said. “Concentrate on what’s inside the room you’ll be entering:
Lizzie in pain, wondering where her wife is, and Finn, worried that you’ll be
jealous.”

“I am jealous.”
Jill frowned and I could see from her expression that her angst was tumbling
back. “I want that to be me.”

Join the club!

“And it will be.
One day,” I said patiently. “But right now it’s Lizzie’s turn. Don’t spoil that
for her.”

Jill shook her
head and glanced past me to the door. “How can I pretend to be happy for her
when I’m terrified?”

I wanted to slap
her, to jolt her out of the negativity she was spiraling into, but I wasn’t
Fritha. So I said, “Alright, don’t pretend. Just reserve judgement.”

“What?” She
refocused on me.

“Go into the room
and see what’s happening. Don’t project anything onto it. Just look at what’s
there.” I squeezed her shoulder. “It might not be what you think.”

She stared into my
eyes for the longest time, and I had no idea what she was thinking, but at last
she said, “You’ll be here for me?”

“As close as
they’ll let me.” I was sure there’d be a waiting room nearby.

“Okay.” She
nodded. “I’ll just go in there.”

“Good girl.” I
didn’t bother to pick up my shoes. I held Jill’s hand and walked her in. We
found a nurse who took me to a waiting room where I hugged Jill and promised
again that I’d stay. Then she went with the nurse.

The next part was
hard. I ached for the angst Jill was going through, and was cranky that Sieu
wasn’t here to be with her wife. Where the hell was she? She was Finn’s
operations manager. She should have been at his wedding ceremony, by Lizzie’s
side, especially while she was due any day.

It was hard to
wait, but the nurses were lovely. One brought my shoes, which I put back on.
Then I tried to drink a coffee from the vending machine but that just made me
queasy, and as I’d had no food all day, that made perfect sense. A red-haired
nurse showed me the toilets, and after I’d vomited, I felt marginally better.

When I was back in
the beige waiting room she came to sit with me, bringing a milky tea. “So how
far along are you?” she asked, and in the next few seconds the world slowed
down around me.

I stared at her, trying
to put that sentence into some context, and then…

Oh!

I could have blushed
and said
Oh no, I’m not pregnant
but my stomach started swirling like a
whirlpool draining out and my voice emerged in a horrified whisper.

“Do I look
pregnant?”

She blinked
several times, clearly realizing her mistake, but before she could retract it,
I grabbed her arm, stunned by what I hadn’t put together until this point.

“My period is
late.”

I wanted to be thrilled.
I’d waited so long to be pregnant, but I wasn’t married. I wasn’t even in a
relationship. If I
was
pregnant, the baby was Jack’s and…

My cheeks burned
with humiliation, remembering the cold way he’d left me. My dreams had never
included being a single mother.

She was frowning
when she said, “What if you…” Then she looked over her shoulder but no one was
coming, “…do a pregnancy test now, while you’re waiting for your friend.”


Yes.
” I
absolutely had to know. Straight away. “How?”

“Well…without
involving a doctor, you could nip down to the pharmacy on the ground floor and
grab a test kit. Come back up here to the toilets. Quick pee…”

I nodded. “My
friend—”

“I’ll keep an eye
out for her.”

I swallowed down
the hysteria that wanted to bubble up.
Was it possible?
“What’s your
name?”

“Collie. I’m an
Irish Colleen.” She had no accent, so she was clearly mocking herself, but with
a peaches-and-cream complexion she looked the part, and was roughly my age. I
wanted to ask if she had children, and what it felt like to be pregnant, but I
had to know about me first.

“I’m Angela. Will
you be here when I get back?”

“I’m here for
hours, Angela,” she said, using my name the way the paramedic had when I’d
broken my wrist. “Come to the nurse’s station when you’ve done the test and we’ll
talk. Okay?”

I nodded. Then I
got up on shaky legs and started walking.

 

Two pink lines.

I’m pregnant.

I stood in the
toilet cubicle, staring at the testing device in my hand, shaking my head. Not
because I didn’t believe it. My queasiness, heightened emotions, and the
sensitivity of my breasts—which I’d put down to thinking sexy thoughts about
Jack!—all made sense. I’d read about these symptoms a hundred times when I’d be
hoping to experience them. How had I not recognized them?

I shook my head
again, trying to wake myself out of the cotton wool settling on my brain. Jill
might have come out by now. I wanted to be there for her. I had to think past
this to the rest of the world, so I forced myself to cap the testing stick and
slide it into my handbag. The instructions had said that would preserve the
result, although who I would show it to…

“Angela,” Collie
said as I approached her desk. “Your friend hasn’t come out.” There were two
nurses standing behind her, so she just raised her eyebrows. I simply nodded.

She got up and
hurried around to lead me back to the waiting room. “It’s a slow night. We’ve
got plenty of time,” she said, and surprised me by sitting at my side and
taking my hand. “Are you married?”

I shook my head,
wondering why I wasn’t speaking. Did I not trust my voice?

“I can see it’s a
shock.”

I swallowed, and forced
myself to say, “I’ve always wanted a baby.” My voice was low and didn’t sound
like me at all. “With my husband,” I added. “But we split up six months ago.”

“I see. And the
father of the baby?”

My heart pounded
in my chest, but I had to say the words. I had to admit it to myself.

“Gone.”

“Oh.” She nodded,
and I could see sympathy brimming in her eyes. How often did they hear stories
like this? There was no disapproval on her face, such as I could expect to see
from Louella. Collie seemed to be simply offering support, without judgement,
and I was immensely grateful for that.

I knew others would
find my situation tawdry—my mother included—but a child was such a beautiful
beginning, no matter how it was conceived. There could never be anything ugly
about that. Babies were perfect. And when I could get past my fear of carrying
the responsibility alone, I’d be rejoicing.

Unfortunately, in
that moment, I was stuck between shock and fear.

“You look pale,”
Collie said. “You’re not going to vomit again?”

I shook my head.
“I’m just scared.”

“And pregnant,”
she said, surprising me with a smile, her eyes sparkling with what looked like
hope. “Not every woman gets to experience that.”

When I’d split up
with Danny, I’d started to lose hope. So I nodded with her and then I couldn’t
help crying. “I thought I’d never be pregnant.”

“And now you are.”
She squeezed my good hand. “Lucky you.”

Lucky me.

I nodded again.
“I’m so happy. And so scared.”

She laughed and I
had a teary laugh with her. Then she said, “Do you want to ring someone?”

I thought about
that while we gazed at each other. “No. My friends are all here. Well, nearby.
I’ll wait.”

“Okay.” She let go
my hand and then patted it. “I’ll be just back there.” She pointed. “No crying
without me.”

We smiled at each
other. “Deal.”

“And it goes
without saying that you should see your doctor, so you can get started with
planning for the birth.”

I nodded again.
The
birth
. It was real. I was going to have a baby.

She seemed happy
with that, and left me to the empty waiting room.

But I wasn’t
alone. Deep inside me was a microscopic speck of life, wreaking havoc with my
hormones. It wouldn’t even be as big as a grain of rice. But it was mine.
Forever. I wouldn’t be a lonely old lady. I’d be a mother, until I died. It was
humbling and glorious all at the same time.

And Jack had done
that. He’d given me that. The tiny cells that would be furiously multiplying
were a part of him. And a part of me. If it was a boy, would it look like him?

I suddenly hoped
so. I wanted my baby to remind me of Jack, because…I loved him. I could feel that
so easily when I remembered lying in his arms, listening to the steady beat of
his heart while he slept. That emotion felt like a soft creature stirring
inside my chest, purring in fact. It was comfort and happiness rolled up in a
blanket of security.

Which was crazy,
because he didn’t love me back. Oh, he desired me. But the self-directed anger
on his face when he’d said,
Only an idiot would spend his time thinking
about a woman who isn’t right for him
was engraved in my memory. It was
obvious that he resented the attraction between us, and as soon as that phone
call had come, reminding him of his real life, he’d vanished.

Without a backward
glance.

I couldn’t imagine
any possible future where he’d be happy to see me, let alone know that I bore
his child, so I did my best to let those thoughts go, so I could concentrate on
the happiness of being a momma, and I was surprised at just how thrilling that
was when I pushed everything else away.

When Sieu rushed
past the waiting room, ignoring me completely, I felt nothing but happiness
that Lizzie would finally have her wife with her. And when Jill strode into the
waiting room an hour later, I was blissed out on feel-good endorphins, and so
Zen they could have built a monastery around me.

“It’s a boy!” She
was grinning from ear to ear and I couldn’t help being swept up into her
excitement as I jumped up to hug her. “Bloody hell, it looked hard, though,”
she added, shaking her head. “I’m not signing up for that any time soon. All
that screaming and grunting and…”

She shuddered, and
I opened my mouth to say
I’m already signed up
but she rushed on with, “But
the best part…” And she grabbed my shoulders for emphasis, “…is that I was
thrilled
.
This is Lizzie and Sieu’s baby. Well, albeit that Sieu is freaked about the
idea of two lesbians raising a son. But I wasn’t jealous.”

“I knew you’d lick
this.”

“I just did what
you said. I just stood there watching, and all I saw was love.” Her eyes were
damp. “I’d gone in worried about jealousy or awkwardness or…I don’t even
remember now what the other things were. But none of it was there.”

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