Hustler (37 page)

“Gavin, what is the point of doing this? You have nothing to prove.”

“I’m not going over this again,” I seethe to Scott. “Fucking drop it.”

“I love you man, but you’re being an idiot. You’re just too stubborn to see it.”

“You don’t get it.”

“Oh no, I do,” Scott cuts me off. “I get it, man. You grew up in this atmosphere, you watched it destroy your dad and you’ve made it your mission to make sure it doesn’t happen to you as well. Message well received, but what you don’t realize is that you’re following in your father’s footsteps more than you ever have. You’re casting aside everything that’s ever meant anything to you and attempting to beat a loser like Harley who means absolutely nothing in your life. Be the bigger man, be the
better
man.”

I have no response because I know, deep down inside that Scott is right.

“Here,” he hands me a ticket. “If you change your mind, there’s a seat waiting for you. Hopefully I’ll see you there.”

Scott left with a disappointed and sorrowful look on his face. Everything about it made me sick to my stomach and that nagging feeling that kept telling me over and over again that I was making the wrong choice grew stronger, to the point now that I can’t even take a sip of my whiskey I feel so nauseous.

“Mr. Saint, are you in?” the dealer asks. Davies opted out of this game, just like everyone else, so she can see Penelope perform, so there’s a strange man talking to me now, asking whether I want to participate.

Shit.

“Yeah,” I respond, flipping my chip to the center like every other ante I’ve ever made.

As the cards are meticulously dealt, I look around the table, the spark in Tucker and Harley’s eyes is the same spark I once had. I used to feel a rush with every hand shuffled, with every card flipped, now, all I can feel is a burning hole in my jacket pocket from where the ticket rests, singeing me to the point that my entire body starts to heat up.

Trying to ignore the feeling of self-hatred and regret coursing through me, I take a look at my cards with a slight lift at the corners. Double aces, fuck that’s a good hand.

Glancing around the table, Tucker seems calm, not excited or fidgety, just calm. Harley is flipping his chip casually glancing down at his cards and waiting in anticipation for the community cards to be laid out.

Normally, after seeing two aces in my hand, I would be elated, having a party inside, ready to take down the table, but right now, I feel nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing. I’m empty, there is no excitement, no thrill, just…
nothing
.

Keeping a blank face, I watch as the flop card is dealt. Six of hearts. No use to me. As if I’m watching from above, in an outer body experience, the game plays out, bets are placed and the turn and the river cards are dealt. Leaving me with three of a kind, aces high. A fucking good hand, a winning hand, especially since the rest of the cards are crap.

Eyes fixated on the cards, Harley flips his chip in the opposite direction and then raises the bet, turning in a hundred thousand. I resist from shaking my head at his outlandish way of bluffing. It’s clear from this tell that he has nothing for cards but is trying to use leverage from the ace facing toward the sky on the table.

I can take him down, right here, call him out on his bluff, so I do just that. I raise him another two hundred thousand just for the hell of it. Tucker is out, smart move, but Harley? He raises me again while his fingers fidget with his poker chip, stumbling occasionally.

I pause and reflect on my next move. Do I raise? If I do, he’ll no doubt match and raise again, trying to scare me away. If I call, I can end it here and take the winnings, add more cash to the pile and continue to move forward with destroying Harley until he’s out.

But where does that leave me? With a fuller bank account and the knowledge of being the best player in the world, a fact I’m already aware of. Do I prove that I didn’t let a woman affect me, that I, for once and for all, am better than my dad?

Graham and Scott’s words ring through my head. I’m no better than my dad at this very moment. There is nothing fun about this, there is nothing exciting. I’m just an empty man inside, reaching for something he already has.

But there is something I don’t have, something that’s replaced the thrill of a hand of cards, something that’s awakened me, something that makes me so fucking alive, and I’m the world’s biggest ass for not realizing it sooner.

Penelope is everything I should be chasing after, everything I should be focusing on, but instead, what am I doing? I’m sitting around a table with a bunch of men who I used to share a like mind with, accomplishing absolutely nothing.

Jesus
.

For the first time ever, I show a tell, giving myself away. What Harley must think is a show of uncertainty over his raise, it’s actually realization that I am a goddamn moron and could have possibly thrown away my future over a stupid game.

I grip my forehead and try to calm the pounding of my heart that’s waging a war inside my chest. This is all wrong, I don’t belong here… not anymore. Looking up at Harley, I call.

Shock floats over his eyes as I nod at his cards to flip them over. He sets his chip down that’s he’s been manhandling for the entire length of the game and uses one of the cards to flip the other over, revealing a pair of sixes. What an idiot.

The audience already knows I’ve won, they can see the cards we have because the special cameras in the table. But this isn’t about winning, this is about moving on from this game and showing everyone once and for all, I don’t need this. This isn’t me anymore. My reign of the poker world comes to an end tonight. Nodding, I toss my cards face down—I don’t need him to see my hand was actually better—in the center is false defeat.

Tipping my whiskey back, I say, “You got me.” Then I lift from my seat and flip a chip at the dealer. “I’m out gentlemen. I have another engagement to attend.”

“Where the fuck are you going? We’re not done.” Harley spits, clearly not happy that I’m leaving.

Turning to him and buttoning my suit jacket I say, “You just won, why don’t you celebrate before the little vein in your head pops?”

“You still have over a million left to play.”

“Yes, I realize that. But unlike you, poker’s no longer my life. I have nothing to prove here.”

Leaving, I know security will take care of my money and I take off to the entrance to hail a cab. I might not have something to prove at the poker table, but I sure as hell have a lot to prove when it comes to Penelope.

***

The heavy beat of death defying music pounds through the theater just as Penelope finalizes the wrapping of her ribbon. Lights flash all around her and the two other women who are all hanging in the air, upside down in nude, skin tight leotards. In tandem, just as the music crests, they let their grip on the ribbons loosen and they spiral down to the floor, stopping a few feet from the bottom just as the lights go off and the crowd erupts in cheers.

Chills spread over my skin because of how magnificent she was. I made it to the theater just in time to catch her act and I couldn’t be happier with my decision to leave the game, I would have hated myself forever if I missed this. This is more of a thrill I’ve ever gotten with a game of cards.

Thanks to being the best poker player in the world, the producer of the show allowed me to stand in the wings to watch Penelope. Yes, Scott got me a good seat, but it wasn’t good enough, I want to be the first person to congratulate Penelope on her first ever performance. Plus, I had a pretty good angle to record the whole thing for her parents.

The crowd continues to cheer while the lights are dimmed and I wait in anticipation for my little brunette to approach me.

Unlike all the other acts during the show, the ribbon performers are the most natural in their costumes with their flesh-like leotards, wavy undone hair, and barely there make up. From what I could see, they had a few diamonds encrusted on their suits and framed around their eyes, but that’s about it. She looked beautiful up there, magical, and fuck if I didn’t get hard watching her. Her fluid movements, the way she gripped the material with her thighs. What I wouldn’t give right about now to have those strong legs wrapped around my waist as I pound into her relentlessly, her eyes scorching up at me with lust…w ith love.

“That was amazing ladies,” someone calls to the side as Penelope and the two other girls approach, laughing and congratulating each other.

The smile on her face is priceless and right at this moment, I realize, poker is my past and Penelope is my future. I would do anything for this woman, and I mean anything. Even if it’s throwing a game to my biggest competitor, anything to see those beautiful eyes looking up at me.

She’s full of glee as she walks toward me but the minute her eyes connect with mine, her face falls and the once jovial expression she shared with her friends is nowhere to be found.

“Gavin,” she says, looking around and stepping to the side. “What are you doing here?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” I ask, placing my hands on her hips only to be pushed away. Clearly this is going to be harder than I expected.

Wanting some privacy, I pull her into an alcove off to the side and trap her against a wall, the only exit being behind me. If she wants to flee, she’s going to have to get through me first.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Without skipping a beat, I press my lips against hers and get lost in the feel of her mouth moving against mine. Fuck she feels so good. Every last bit of tension in my body flees as I grip her face with my hands and melt into her, getting lost in the best way possible. Pure euphoria encases me as her tongue reaches out to mine, searching for more. It’s an indication that she hasn’t given up on me yet. It’s all I need. It’s everything.

Reluctantly, I stop the kiss and rest my forehead against hers, trying to look into her eyes. I’m about to tell her how sorry I am when her hands meet my chest and pushes me away, sending me backwards a few steps, shocking the hell out of me.

“You can’t just kiss me like that, Gavin!”

Straightening myself I ask, “And why the fuck not?”

“Because you lost that privilege the moment I walked out of your villa!”

Gripping the back of my neck, I prepare myself for the grovel of the century.

“What if I told you I was scared, that I had no clue what I wanted until I lost it, that the last few days without you have been so fucking miserable that I haven’t been able to sleep because you’re not next to me, pressed up against my side.”

Her shoulders relax just slightly as she shifts in place, arms crossed over her chest, head tilted to the side. “I’d say you can keep saying things like that,” she replies, her voice full of the sass I’ve fallen so in love with.

Yup, she isn’t making this easy on me at all.

Sighing, I take a deep breath, ready to pour it all out on the table for her.

I take her hands in mine and look her straight in the eyes. “For the longest time, ever since I can remember, poker has been what my life’s been about. I haven’t known anything else. My father taught me everything I know. Hell, it’s the
only
thing he ever taught me, and I used that to my advantage to get to where I am today, but slowly as time ticked by, I started to realize the game was no longer fun. It no longer challenged me, it was just something I did to kill the time. And then you came along…”

I bring her hands up to my lips and kiss her knuckles softly.

“At first, you were a nut I had to crack, I had to get inside you because everything about you is alluring, tempting, fucking heavenly. I needed a taste. I couldn’t have possibly known you’d put up such a goddamned fight, challenging me in a way that I’ve never experienced before, and just like that, I became addicted. I became addicted to our little cat and mouse game, to our push and pull. You thrill me, excite me, you question everything I do, but at the same time, you make me feel so fucking full, it amazes me.”

I kiss her again, pulling her in closer and she actually allows me to. Thank fucking God.

“Then you let me behind that tough exterior of yours, you let down your walls and gave yourself over. I remember the first night I sank into you. In my bed, the moon shining down on us. Fuck, Penelope, it was the single most fulfilling moment of my entire life. More fulfilling than any poker win. Knowing I was a part of you, that I’d finally earned you.
That
was what fueled me, that’s what has been fueling me ever since. I may have lost my way, I may have lost my head when approached by my past but that’s exactly what it is now, my past. You’re my future.”

Releasing her hands, I bring mine up to her face where I cup her cheeks gently and stroke my thumbs against her soft skin. Her lips part and her eyes sparkle up at me. I have her where I want her, seconds from falling over. There is just one more thing I have to say to her before I win the biggest fucking bet in my life.

“Everything about you, from your determination, your soft soul, your fiery spirit, and your sassy mouth turns me on and eats me alive. You’re a part of me, Penelope. You’re in my blood. I’m so fucking yours, I would do anything to have you in my life, even walk out on a poker game just so I can see you perform.” This is it, I let my nerves settle in my stomach and I speak softly as the words pour out of me. “I love you, Penelope. I love you so fucking much. Please say you forgive me, please let me be the man you need, the man I want to be. Let me be the man who gets to love you and claim you as his.”

Her eyes well up with tears and her hands grip my arms. Through my suit jacket I can feel the burn of her touch, scorching through me. Fuck, I need her to forgive me. I need it more than air.

I wait with bated breath. Her eyes search mine for answers and just when I think she’s going to pull away, her lips part and she smiles.

“Your eyes are so dark, I can never read them,” she says in a whisper. I can barely hear her over the music playing in the background. “I’ve never been able to tell if you’ve been bluffing when it came to me, but right here, right now, there’s a spark in them, a spark I’ve seen maybe a few times at a glance. But it’s there now. It hasn’t gone away.” Standing on her tippy toes, she kisses me lightly on the lips.