Read I Won't Give Up on You Online
Authors: F. L. Jacob
“She seems to be fine, I’m not sure why the monitors reacted the way they did. Her bandages look clean still. It had to have been her muscles twitching. I’m sorry, Mr. Black, but she doesn’t seem to be coming out of this,” Dr. Dana said.
The room was silent again. Beep, Beep, Beep, Buzz…
I wanted her here with me.
Please, come back to me, Sabrina.
Bre and I were connected. Our souls were one. We were both fucked up and broken, but together we made each other whole again.
I couldn’t stay away, I sat on the side of the bed, took her hand mine, and started stroking my thumb over her knuckles again. I wish I could hold her in my arms, pull her into me, and place a deep kiss on her tender lips. I wanted to feel her heart beat on my chest as I held her close to me, snuggled safe in our bed.
The door swung open, bringing me out of my thoughts. Jon walked in carrying food and a change of clothes. He set a stack of paperwork down on the windowsill and turned toward me.
“Caston, you need to go home, get some rest. You can’t live by her side. The doctors aren’t sure when, or if, she will wake up.”
My head snapped up, and I stared him down. “Are you fucking kidding me right now? Can you honestly tell me that if this was Sara you’d leave her alone like this? Do you know she moved today?”
His eyes widened, and he moved closer to her bed. “I know, buddy, but maybe you just thought she did. I mean they said that muscles twitch and shit when people are in comas.”
I shrugged off the hand he placed on my shoulder. “Don’t pander to me, Jon. She moved.”
“Shit, chill out, bro, fine—she moved. Go shower, you reek. I’ll sit with her.”
I sighed, looking back over at Bre. I stood and placed a kiss on her cheek before heading to the bathroom to clean up.
Before I shut the door, I saw Jon did in fact take up my vigil next to Bre. I heard him whisper, “Baby girl, you need to wake up. Caston isn’t himself. Sara’s a mess. I need the people I love to be happy again, and you seem to be the tape holding them together.” He placed a kiss on her forehead, and, if I’m not mistaken, Jon sniffled.
The smell of soap drifted through the air, tickling my senses. Caston must have taken a shower, I thought. Then I felt it, a warm sponge moving along up my leg and down the other, ever so slowly. I recognized the hands. Caston was bathing me. There was music playing in the background. It was too quiet to recognize, but it seemed to calm me.
I felt my eyes flutter, and my heart skipped a beat. Caston was facing away from me, taking care of washing my feet.
He was wearing a tight white t-shirt with worn blue jeans that fit him in all the right places. I felt butterflies in my stomach. He’s here, my Caston is here. I love this man so much.
“Cass?” I whispered. My throat hurt and felt like it was on fire. I tried to move, but my arms and legs felt like lead.
Caston swung around so fast he knocked the pan of soapy water onto the floor. “Sabrina?”
I tried to smile. His arms were around me, pulling me into him, before I could even process moving. His kisses landed all over my face. “Sabrina, I knew you wouldn’t give up. I just couldn’t believe when they said you might not come back to me. I love you, Bre.”
Tears started trailing down my cheeks. Just as his lips found mine, a crash of glass pulled us apart. Sara had just turned the corner into my room. She was stopped dead in her tracks, staring at me like she didn’t believe what she was seeing. The floor was littered with broken glass, flowers, and the bag of food that she had brought for Caston. She rushed to the bed side and scooped up my hand in hers, tears falling down her face.
Nurses and doctors rushed into the room when they heard the commotion. Caston and Sara were moved away from me. I kept my eyes glued to Caston. His silver blue eyes had a red tint to them. How long has he been sitting by my side?
He smiled. His perfect lips mouthed,
‘I love you, baby’
. I felt like everyone was moving in slow motion and they would never leave.
As I looked around the room, I couldn’t believe the amount of flowers and cards lining the walls and window sills. Sara was by the windows on her phone. Finally, the last nurse and doctor left my room, and Caston was immediately by my side, his lips covering mine. I raised my hand to try to pull him closer to me, but I was stopped by the IVs. I backed out of the kiss and frowned. “How long have I been like this, Caston?”
His hand cupped my cheek, and I placed my hand over his. The warmth spread through my body. “Sabrina, it’s been a little over a month. I was so scared.”
My mouth fell open. “My dance review, graduation—the shooting and Beverly?” I felt my eyes start to water. My breathing became heavy and shallow.
“Professor Lee passed you without the review. She didn’t need to see you dance.”
“But, Caston, how will I get a job dancing, not being part of the review? That’s all my parents ever wanted. All I’ve ever wanted.” Tears threatened on their brink. Any minute they were going to fall.
Caston leaned forward and lightly kissed my forehead. “Bre… how can I tell you this?” He paused, looking sick.
“What?” I whispered, barely able to talk.
“The doctors aren’t sure if you’ll be able to dance again.”
I pulled out of his embrace. “What?”
He swallowed hard. “I’m so sorry, Sabrina.”
I laid back on the bed and faced away from him. I couldn’t breathe. My life had been taken away, even though my body drew breath. One split second and everything changed. My chest hurt, as if someone squeezed my heart. I began sobbing uncontrollably. “My whole life I’ve wanted to be a dancer. My parents gave up so much for me to get where I was. They even gave up their lives, and now I can’t even give them this one last thing.”
“Your parents would be proud of you. For the women you’ve become. One thing I promise you, Sabrina, I will do everything possible to help you get back to dancing. I won’t give up if you won’t.” He stroked my head, trying to calm me.
Caston walked to the other side of the bed and tipped my face toward his, making me look up at him. Brushing the tears away he looked deep into my eyes, whispering, “Sabrina, tell me—please, tell me what happened with your parents.”
Shaking my head, I pulled away, looking at him terrified. “No, I can’t—not right now. It’s too much, too soon.”
He took my head in his hands and rested his forehead on mine, kissing my nose before he placed a chaste kiss on my lips. Pulling back, he looked me in the eyes. His icy blues were a blaze. “When you’re ready, baby. I’ll be here to listen.”
I choked on some tears. “Funny thing is that over the past year, I was tired of trying to make it. I was tired of dancing. I knew I wanted more from life, but I couldn’t let my parents down. Not after all they gave up for me.”
“Don’t do this to yourself. Just get some rest. If you want to dance again, you will. I’ll make sure of it. If you want to do something else, say the word. We’ll get through this. I’m not saying it will be easy. Fuck, it’s going to be harder than anything we’ve ever gone through, but together we can do anything.”
Dr. Dana came in, interrupting us. I tried to listen as she explained exactly what happened and confirmed what Caston said about how I might not dance again.
Once we were alone again I look over at Caston. “It’s going to be a long road, huh?”
He pulled me closer to his side and kissed the top of my head. “Yes, baby, a long road.”
We sat in silence. I enjoyed his strong arm around me. Listening to his heartbeat, I felt myself drift to sleep on his chest.
Waking with a start, I realized Caston had fallen asleep on my hospital bed too. I smiled at him. He looked so uncomfortable, poor guy. I slid over further to give him more room. He must have sensed the room because he moved closer to the middle of the bed and rolled toward me. Turning the television off, the room fell into semi darkness. I slid down and rolled, as best as I could, to face him. I loved watching him sleep. I let my hands brush some of the hair off of his brow and followed the line of his face before placing a light kiss on his lips. He smiled and reached out hooking my waist, he pulled me to him. I immediately drifted back to sleep.
Nurse Kelsey woke us up the next day, informing us that we were being moved to another floor in the hospital, since I didn’t need to be in ICU anymore. It was a private wing with restricted access. Caston had informed me that the press were camped outside, waiting for any information they could glean from anyone, and he had to ensure my safety. I was taken back that people were wondering about me.
Once we were settled into the new suite, I barely had a second to relax before my physical therapist entered the room, announcing it was time for me to start physical therapy. Caston helped me up and started to lead me to the wheelchair.
“No, sir, Dr. Dana has in her paperwork that Ms. Bennett has to walk to therapy.”
We both stopped and looked at her.
“But, I can’t put pressure on my leg. It hurts too badly.”
She pulled out a walker and shrugged. “Orders are orders. Sorry.”
I placed both hands on the cold plastic handles of the walker and shifted my weight to my good leg. Caston had his hands on my waist. Looking over my shoulder at him, I took my first step. The pain radiated through my leg. I whimpered and my eyes welled up with tears.
“She can’t do this,” Caston said a little more forcefully.
“Caston,” I said in a warning tone, “if I don’t, I’ll never heal right.”
He nodded, and I took another step with Lisa’s help. We slowly made our way a few doors down to a PT room on the same wing. I bit my lip so much I was surprised it hadn’t bled.
Out of breath and with tears about to spill, I pleaded, “Can I, please, sit down?”
I was relieved when Lisa nodded and helped me to a chair. Caston was right by my side with a Styrofoam cup of ice water. It felt wonderful going down my parched throat.
“Ten minutes. I’ll be back, and we’ll continue, okay?” Lisa said as she headed out the door.
“Can I get you anything?” Caston asked, kneeling by the chair.
“No, I’ll be okay. One step at a time, right?”
“I love you. You’re doing amazing, my strong girl.”
Just as I was about to answer, Caston’s phone rang.
“Caston,” he answered with a scowl on his face. He stood and covered the phone. “Baby, I have to get this. Will you be okay?”
I grabbed his hand, squeezed, and smiled. “Yes. Go.”
He bent over and captured my lips with his mouth. I was breathless again as he pulled away. Taking another sip of water to calm my burning insides, I watched as he walked out of the room.
I saw on the caller ID it was Detective Alverez and scowled. He’s the last person I wanted to talk to at the moment. Leaving Sabrina, I made it back down the hall to her room, shutting the door for privacy before speaking.
“What do you need, Detective? I’m kinda busy.”
The background noise over the line was distracting. “Mr. Black, there has been a snag with the holding of Mrs. Holden.”
My hands ball up into fists. “What!”
“I’m doing everything in my power to keep her locked up, but we might not be able to.”
I punched the wall. “Are you fucking kidding me? Bre almost died, and that isn’t enough to hold her! She shot her for God’s sake!”
“I know, I’m so sor—”
“Don’t fucking tell me you’re sorry, FIX IT!”
I was so angry I hung up on him and threw my phone across the room. It hit the wall and broke into hundreds of pieces.
FUCK!
Walking to the window, I looked out over the city continuing on below us as if nothing happened. It’s just wasn’t fair. I heard the door open and turned to see Terrance standing in the doorway.
“I need a new phone.”
He nodded his head. “And?”
I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned back against the cold granite window sill. “They might be releasing Beverly. What a fucked up legal system we have.”
Terrance reached for his phone and typed a message into it. Looking back up at me, he said, “Where do we go from here?”
I rubbed my forehead. “I don’t fucking know.”