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Authors: Bernadette Gardner

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symbions, but she wondered if this one might be old enough

to remember a time when Icarians dropped offerings into the

net from their aerie above. Had it learned from that

experience?

With numb fingers, Zara worked at prying the crab's

broken shell open. She managed to tear a few bits of meat

out of the shell and chewed the rubbery flesh gratefully.

Icarians often ate raw crabs, so she figured the uncooked

meat wouldn't leave her any worse off than she already was.

"Well, thank you." She gestured with a crab claw at the

symbion. "Now I won't starve. Any ideas on how I might get

home?"

The symbion only stared at her. Finally, apparently bored

with watching her gnaw on the remnants of the crab, it closed

its eyes and fell asleep.

Caleb woke to Arilani's face hovering above him. To his

surprise, she seemed to be unfastening his restraints.

"What—"

"Shh. Don't speak. We have only a few minutes to

escape."

"Escape why?"

The lovely Icarian woman put her hands on Caleb's hot

face and stared into his eyes. "This is a big planet. You and I

can find an empty aerie so far from here and so remote that

no one will ever find us. We can live out our lives and raise

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our young in peace, and in ten years when our child reaches

maturity and joins with a symbion, we can send him back to

take his place in the tribe, to become Jidar's successor."

The rush of blood into his long unused limbs left Caleb

light-headed. Confused, he sat up slowly, stretching his wings

and rubbing his sore wrists. "What are you talking about?

Running away with me?"

"Of course." With expert care, Arilani began removing

Caleb's IV. Trained in human medical procedures by Danson

and his team, she knew exactly how to shut the IV pump off

to avoid having its alarm sound. "I was to be your designated

mate. I won't allow Jidar to banish you or Danson to destroy

your symbion."

Her words disturbed the creature, sending a tide of panic

through Caleb, but this time he tamped down the

uncontrolled emotion and managed to calm the beast before

it could attempt to take flight in the confines of the small

isolation room. Caleb grabbed Arilani's wrist, and she stilled.

"I won't run away from what I've done."

"Caleb, listen to me. You did not kill Zara. She fell. It was

not your fault."

"Yes, it was." Caleb forced himself to whisper, though he

wanted to yell. He was tired of everyone telling him he wasn't

guilty and feeling sorry for the crazy man with the alien brain

on his back. He knew what he'd done to Zara ... he...

Slowly he let Arilani's arm slip from his fingers. She

pushed the equipment away from his bed, making room for

him to stand and stretch his wings, but he didn't move.

Instead he stared at her.

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"I didn't kill Zara."

"Of course you didn't."

"But
you
told me I did. After you drugged me, you said—"

"No, I didn't. I drugged you on Danson's orders so you

could control your symbion long enough to fly back to the

station. I told you Zara had fallen, but the biochemical

imbalance effected your perception."

He rose slowly, still trying to process his thoughts which

now seemed free of the symbion's emotional quagmire. He

could think clearly, just as Danson had predicted.

Reluctantly, he thought back to his last moment's with

Zara. They'd made love, and he'd been in control then, not

the symbion. He hadn't hurt her. He'd been gentle and

attentive. She'd sent him in search of her missing shorts ...

which he'd removed from her and dropped in the center of

the aerie, near the bed. There was no way the garment could

have blown off the edge of the island from inside the rock

enclosure.

He stared at Arilani for a long moment. "You want me as

your mate?"

"More than anything." She smiled at him, a primitive, feral

expression that held no humor or warmth.

"How badly?" He held her gaze, commanding her full

attention until finally, she had to look away.

"Don't you see that our lives depend on this? Without your

symbion, you will die, and Danson only needs an excuse to

break the bond. He's desperate to prove that the problems

you experienced won't happen to another human. If he

doesn't, then his life's work is a failure. I'm one of the last

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generation of my race. There is no one among my tribe that I

can successfully mate with. My ability to have a child depends

on you. If I don't conceive before the end of this mating

cycle, I will not get another chance." She stepped close and

her deep-set eyes glittered. "Together, you and I can

survive."

"Did you know how I felt about Zara?"

Arilani whirled away from him, her wings ruffling in anger.

"I won't discuss Dr. Abbott. It was never your right to mate

with her. The moment you pledged your fealty to Jidar, you

gave up your right to choose your own mate."

"And who gave you the right to choose for me? Jidar never

said we would be paired up."

"It is given. I was next in line to be mated. I was to

receive you and become the first of the new generation of

Icarian mothers. My child was to be the leader of a new age."

"My child," Caleb echoed. He'd been prepared for the

prospect of fatherhood, but now it seemed like a travesty. He

could never give Arilani a child, even if Jidar ordered him to.

He could never love her when he'd lost his heart forever to

Zara.

"
Our
child," Ari said, a hopeful thread in her voice. "It can

still happen if we leave now before anyone sees us."

Caleb clenched his jaw and moved toward the soundproof

door of his isolation room. Arilani had left it unlocked, and he

pulled it open now. "I'm leaving, Ari. But not with you."

"What?"

"I'm going to look for Zara's body. And not coming back

without her. I'll stay out there searching for her until I die."

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"No!" Arilani lunged toward Caleb, clawing at his arms and

chest. "I won't allow you to throw away the only chance we

have."

"Danson will find someone else."

Arilani screamed again, but this time rather than following

Caleb, she threw herself backward, crashing into the

disconnected monitors that clustered around the empty bed.

Alarms went off all over the station, and the dim lights

flared brilliant white, alerting the late-night staff to a breach

in the iso unit. "He's escaped! Dr. Faulkner, please don't hurt

me..."

Caleb growled. His wings threatened to spread in panic,

but he controlled his symbion's fear response and remained in

the doorway, unmoving while his colleagues rushed at him

from all directions.

"For God's sake, Ari. Why?"

"I needed you, Caleb ... and you destroyed everything."

[Back to Table of Contents]

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Icarus Rising

by Bernadette Gardner

Chapter Sixteen

In the middle of the night the net broke.

Half asleep and delirious with pain and cold, Zara plunged

into the white-capped water. She gasped, drawing salty sea

foam into her mouth and lungs. A convulsive cough sent

unbearable agony shooting through her chest.

She flailed for the nearest rock, nothing more than a black,

shapeless mass in the moonless darkness. Her hand collided

with the hard surface and bones snapped. She screamed in

renewed misery. After a moment of panicked disorientation,

she cursed and clawed her way to a precarious hold on a

slippery shelf of basalt.

The ancient
alor
vines, now slack, had begun to sink

beneath the water. They coiled around her legs like serpents,

threatening to draw her under the surface.

She refused to die this way. She refused to go without

leaving at least a sliver of evidence to mark her grave.

Summoning the last ounce of strength she possessed, Zara

vaulted out of the water and dragged her body onto the tiny

ledge. A broken piece of vine clung to a stone anchor nearby

and the length was just long enough. Painstakingly, Zara

worked her way along the ledge until her bloody fingers made

contact with the water-logged fibers of the vine. She rolled

onto her stomach which gave her another few centimeters of

reach and enabled her to grab the vine and wrap it around

her wrist. If she died here tonight, at least her body wouldn't

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by Bernadette Gardner

sink. Someday perhaps, a passing Icarian would find her

bones here, tied to the rock, and be able to guess her fate.

Someday maybe Caleb would know she hadn't abandoned

him.

Exhausted, Zara closed her eyes and concentrated on

breathing, hoping she would fall asleep soon and drift into

oblivion. The insistent flapping of wings overhead disturbed

her, though, and finally she managed to turn her head and

observe her guardian symbion swooping curiously close. "Go

away." Zara swiped at the bird with her free hand. "Let me

be."

The symbion circled close to the treacherous rocks, its

wing tips brushing Zara's back. "I'm sorry," she murmured

when her eyelids grew heavy. "I know you tried to take care

of me, but I'm too far gone. Just leave me alone now."

An indignant squawk startled her, and she found the

strength to laugh. She had never heard a symbion call before.

This one seemed very agitated, angry, in fact. Perhaps it had

grown impatient for its dinner after fattening her up with an

offering of crab meat and couldn't wait for her to die so it

could eat her.

"Go ahead." She waved her hand at it. "Just leave a few

bones for someone to find."

Her delirious laughter stilled when the bird descended on

her. Its weight on her back was crushing, but Zara had no

strength left to fight. "No, no ... I didn't really mean... Oh

Caleb, please help me."

She sobbed and clenched her eyes shut waiting for the

killing bite, but it never came. Instead she felt a strange,

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by Bernadette Gardner

electric warmth spread down from a spot at the nape of her

neck.

Terror at the odd sensation washed through her for a

minute, and then all her pain and discomfort ceased.

Suddenly she felt completely at home, comforted by the

pounding surf, refreshed by the relentless ocean spray and

undaunted by the sharp, slippery landscape of the volcanic

rocks. This was her nesting area. This was her territory.

"We are now one."
A wordless voice in her head told her.

"We are safe and whole. It is time to rest."

Zara closed her eyes, giddy with the absurdity of her

delusion and no longer able to fight her need for sleep.

Content to let herself go, she drifted off into oblivion.

Two Icarian males held Caleb's wings and arms,

preventing him from fleeing or taking flight. It didn't matter

to them that he had no intention of escaping. Whatever came

of the proceedings, he was prepared to accept the

consequences.

Jidar stood before him on the beach, in roughly the same

spot he'd occupied on the day of Caleb's joining.

The Icarian leader wore a mask-like expression, and

beside him, her head bowed in grief, Namara stood silently

weeping.

Arrayed behind the Icarians, the research station staff had

assembled. They stood silently, eyes averted, as was the

custom when Icarian justice was meted out.

"Caleb Faulkner, you stand before me accused of killing Dr.

Zara Abbott, an act to which you have confessed. Jidar's voice

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by Bernadette Gardner

rang like a granite bell, in heavy, inarguable tones. "I am told

you have retracted your confession."

"I have, my liege."

"Why?"

"I have no memory of killing Dr. Abbott. I know now that I

did not intentionally harm her, but I am still responsible for

her death and I am ready to accept my punishment."

"You understand that you may forfeit your symbion and

face charges under human law, which may treat you more

leniently than I will?"

"Yes, my liege. I understand. I chose to become Icarian. I

pledged my loyalty to Icarian ways and laws and made them

my own. I will not forsake my symbion even if it means a

more lenient punishment."

Raymond Danson spoke up now. "Jidar, please. You can't

punish Caleb for Zara's murder. If she fell, it wasn't his fault."

"Dr. Danson, I believe your people call it negligence. Dr.

Faulkner took Dr. Abbott to a dangerous environment where

she was not equipped to survive. While her death may have

been accidental, and we will never know the truth of it, Dr.

BOOK: Icarus Rising
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