ICE (The Benders Series) (10 page)

“Do you think I like this?” she questioned, her voice stern but soft. “Jon is my son.”

“And he can hear you,” I fired back, finding it inconsiderate of her to have such a discussion in front of him. Though honestly, I doubted that he could hear what we were saying over his manic yelling.

She sighed and finally I saw pain in her eyes. “He’s getting too strong.”

“You should have told him,” I interrupted, completely aware of where the conversation was headed. We all knew a day would come when Jon became too much for my mother to handle. I guess I didn’t expect that day to be so soon.

She nodded, admitting the mistake. “I should have. I didn’t think anything would come of it,” my mother confessed. “But I wanted him to live. I didn’t want to choose for him who he could and couldn’t date.”

“But what if he does love her?” I asked, quoting Jon’s words from during the battle.

“He’s nineteen. He doesn’t know what love is,” she answered quickly.

But I retorted with twice the speed, “Weren’t you married at nineteen?”

She didn’t have a rebuttal. We stared at each other for a long time, soaking in the reality of what had just happened and what would happen soon. I could see a fear growing in her eyes like a raging wildfire. I could see the agony building like a tall glass skyscraper. I could feel her hurt. It was worse than any physical wound could cause.

“He’ll be calm soon,” she noted, breaking our stare. “We should leave him for the moment.”

For the first time that day, I agreed with her.

And so, we both left him there in his enraged state.

I went outside. I needed peace for a moment. I need to escape.

I climbed one of the leafless trees and took a sit on one of the sturdier high branches. Once I was there, I took a deep breath. The winter was fading fast. Soon there would be buds on the branches of the very tree that I sat in. Soon there would be green grass upon the icy ground. Soon the small layer of snow that still made Minnesota its home would be gone.

My faith was fading fast now too. Soon the joys of frost and the life of the icicles would melt away. Soon the yellow summer daisies would scatter themselves over the rink where we’d played hockey. Soon my brother, if not now, would be too powerful to stay in the house that I called home. Soon Jon would be gone.

I breathed in the crisp air for several more minutes before descending from my perch. I couldn’t sit there thinking for too much longer. I wasn’t a depressed person.

Instead, I made my way back into the kitchen where my brother was silent now. His head hung, his hair was more wild than usual, and his breathing remained loud but was under control.

I was quiet when I entered. I didn’t know if he’d heard me.

“Jon?” I started, not knowing how to say everything that I wanted to say.

“I’m sorry,” he gasped, his head still hanging. I couldn’t even see a trace of his face due to the way his hair dangled downward.

“No,” I said. “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

“I could have killed her, Bryce,” he huffed, still catching his breath. “I need control. I need it.”

I swallowed hard, my sympathy always growing. “I know,” I agreed. “But this was all avoidable. If mom would have told you about Kenna sooner then-“

Before I could finish my sentence, Jon began a terrible sob. I didn’t know how to comfort him as he cried.

I hated seeing him like this.

“What if it is all a hoax?” he managed to choke. “What if she is just a scout?”

“I don’t think she is, Jon,” I said though I didn’t know if I believe my own words. “Maybe she doesn’t even know what she is.”

He shook his head as the tears continued to drip though some of them froze directly to his face. “But it makes sense. She approached me. Her falling under the ice was probably a trap to gain the proof that she needed. I’m such a fool,” he managed to sputter. “But I still think that I love her.”

I swallowed again.

“No,” I reasoned. “I see the way she looks at you. She’s not a fraud. She actually really likes you.”

“The way she looked at me today,” he whispered. “I broke her. I broke her like a twig.”

I didn’t know what he was referring to and asked an oblivious, “What do you mean?”

“I told her that I couldn’t see her anymore. That I needed space,” he explained, his head still drooped in shame. “I know she’s crying right now. She didn’t understand. She thought that everything was perfect, and it was.”

“Then why did you end it? How did you figure it out?” I asked, observing that he was continuing to calm as he spoke.

“She invited me in to meet her dad. I got near the front step, and suddenly I felt it. I could feel a crazy powerful heat source standing right inside her house. Then it hit me. Her dad had to have been a flame lord, making her at least a half. And it made sense. It explained everything,” he cried as he began to lift his head. “And I didn’t know what to do. So I just… ran. I ended everything.”

He was looking up at me now. His eyes were glowing blue again, and the veins in his eyes were red, making them appear bloodshot and weary from the tears.

“I’m sure things can be fixed. Maybe you should tell her,” I half-heartedly suggested though it was hardly a realistic option.

“How can she not know what she is, Bryce?”

“You didn’t even know,” I argued. “If she doesn’t have bending ability then she might have no idea. It is possible.”

He nodded now, and I could see just a minuscule glint of optimism and hope settling within him.

“I can’t believe that,” he shook his head. “I don’t know what to believe. And I don’t know that it matters now.”

I didn’t know if he knew what the consequences of the battle would be, but apparently he did. I didn’t want to talk about it though. I didn’t want to think about his leaving.

“Are you okay?” he asked, seeing that I wanted to change the subject. “I at least tried to move you out of the way for the record,” he added with a smile.

I smiled as he grew lighthearted. “I’m fine. Took you out myself. Who needs mom or the others when I’m here,” I bragged with a laugh.

It was hard to laugh though. Jon was so difficult to understand. We all knew that he had no control when he went into his manic state, and yet, he had control enough to move me out of the line of fire. It never made sense to me.

Suddenly the ice that enclosed his body shattered, and our mother appeared behind us.

“Very funny, Bryce,” she smirked, acknowledging that she’d been listening to the conversation.

Jon fell to the ground, his body trembling from the ache that the enchanted ice had brought upon them. He managed to pull himself to a sit with his knees up and his back resting against what was left of a kitchen counter.

I could see that he was beginning to sob again. Clearly it was over the guilt of what could have happened to our mother. He put his head down between his knees, and I could hear his cries beginning again.

“Leave us, Bryce,” she ordered as she kneeled in front of Jon.

I did as she instructed and left the pair on their own. For as long as I could remember, the relationship between my mother and Jon had been quite complicated. And although she was often the target of his rage, their love was resilient and strong.

Their love was different than the rest of ours. Their love had struggle, their love had pain and hurt and anger. For those reasons maybe it seemed more powerful.

They were both full-bloods. My mother was a full-blooded bender and so was Jon’s father, whoever he was. The rest of us were just half-bloods who were fortunate that we inherited any bending ability at all.

But honestly, I didn’t envy Jon’s power. The responsibility and pressures of being a full-blood were truly unfathomable. And his bouts of uncontrollable anger were nothing I desired.

But when I thought about it, it was those very rages that probably cause Jon to be conceived. None of us knew the story, but I had to assume that whoever the rapist was that he had some sort of tug on my mother’s heart. She was probably like me. She probably sympathized with her offender enough to let him go free.

But then Jon. How could he feel? He had to know how much his anger resembled that of his real fathers. After all, our mother was always patient, always calm.

Maybe he hadn’t thought about it. I hoped he hadn’t.

And speaking of thinking, I had had enough of it. I didn’t want to think about the conversation that my mother and Jon were having. I didn’t want to think about my brother being sent off. I didn’t want to think of any of it.

I just wanted to sleep.

I closed my eyes.

And that’s what I did.

Slept.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Alcohol.

Kenna had been thinking a lot about alcohol the last couple days. If she’d been down South, she’d have had her hands on it in no time, but Minnesota was a little different. In Minnesota, she didn’t have the easy access that she’d had before.

The girl had spent the last few days in bed and was in no hurry to get out of it. She hadn’t brushed her hair or her teeth or even changed out of the pajamas she’d thrown on Saturday night. In fact, the only thing she’d done to keep herself together at all was eat, but even that was only half of her usual.

Kenna wasn’t entirely prepared to deal with the emotions that the break up with Jon had triggered. She’d never let herself get so close to anyone before…and never would again, she reminded herself. Though a small voice tried to tell her that the happy memories with Jon were worth the hurt, and the feelings of joy that their relationship had produced were worth the ending rejection, a louder voice told her that they weren’t, that it was all fake, that she was played, and that all of those wonderful feelings were based on lies and deceit.

Kenna hated herself for how much she’d cried. Her first reaction had been shock and disbelief, but by the time she’d heard Jon’s truck speeding away, she knew that it was really over.

Even after the realization, she tried to hide it. She’d gone upstairs, showered, hoisted on the pair of pj’s that she still resided in and pretended not to care. She pretended that none of it happened, that she’d never dated Jon Colewell, that he’d never kissed her or danced with her or rescued her or confided in her all of his deepest secrets. Although she ached to rid her memory of all of the sweet moments with the boy, Kenna simply couldn’t.

And so, she cried. She’d cried for several hours on Saturday night and even some on Sunday. A stinging in her chest let her know that she was heart-broken. It was a brokenness that she hadn’t felt since the day her parents announced their divorce.

Ever since her mother and father split, Kenna had made a promise to harden her heart and to cast out any belief in true love.  Instead, she’d filled herself with anger and a callousness that had generally left her with no friends or even close family members.

But Jon had changed so much of that. Her heart had made room for him, sought him out, and even welcomed him. And now there was a void, an emptiness, an emptiness that had already begun to fill with resentment and hurt and even hatred. And as angry as she was at Jon, she was equally angry at herself for putting herself in such a position in the first place.

You set yourself up, Kenna
, she’d told herself.
You let yourself fall for a guy who was too perfect and too impossible to hold onto.

And now she was like all those girls she’d always hated. The ones who were so pathetic that they were bed-ridden from a simple break-up.

Yes, hatred. She hated feeling this way. So rejected and so self-loathing.

Her dad had tried to make her feel better. Her father, of course, had somewhat easily figured out what had happened despite Kenna’s persistent declines to discuss the matter. He’d tried to take her out to eat, to a movie, offered to make her soup, or even take her shopping. But eventually, and to her surprise, he had been quite understanding and, though initially reluctant, agreed to let her be alone to mope for the remainder of the weekend. It helped that her uncle was visiting that weekend and managed to keep her dad occupied and out of her hair.

And so for almost two days she lingered in her thoughts of Jon Colewell and everything that had happened between them.

But that weekend was up, and Monday had come upon her faster than she’d anticipated.

And so, the girl slumped out of her warm bed and began the proper morning rituals. And in the standard amount of time, she showered, dried her hair and straightened it, put on a bit of mascara, and gotten herself dressed in very casual attire.

Sweatpants and a t-shirt.

They seemed fitting for such an occasion.

Kenna sighed as she made her way downstairs and into the kitchen where fresh eggs and pancakes were waiting for her.

“Thought I’d make you breakfast now that that crazy uncle of yours is headed back down South. Sorry if I’ve neglected you the past few days,” he apologized as he placed the food in front of the teen.

“No, I needed the alone time,” Kenna argued. “I honestly don’t even have an appetite,” she continued as she sat down and slid the food away from her.

“Well that’s not like you,” her father joked. Kenna, however, was in no joking mood. She was still in moping mode.

“I don’t want to go to school,” she confessed with an exhale. “Everyone is going to be asking questions.”

“You have to go to school, Kenna,” he replied though still sympathetic. “Just ignore people if they prod at you. They can find better things to talk about.”

“You obviously haven’t adjusted to the small town life, dad,” she contended quickly. “That’s what people do here, they talk about each other.” The man was unsure of how to combat her very accurate response. “Don’t worry about it,” Kenna said to break the brief silence. “I’ll get through it.”

And with those hardly hopeful words, she made her way out the door and into her vehicle. The drive to school was short as usual, and the girl even arrived a few minutes early like she typically did.

Kenna flung her backpack over her shoulder as she exited her car and began her slow walk into the school building. She hoped that school might distract her from the sudden break up with Jon but seriously doubted that it would. And in fact, it was proving to do quite the opposite.

Britney was the first to approach her about the subject as Kenna reached their hallway. Kenna had texted Britney the day before and explained the break-up without much of a choice. But Kenna had to face it; when one’s relationship status changed on social media, it didn’t go without notice or consequence.

“You doing okay?” Britney asked as she reached for a hug.

Kenna didn’t want to hug her friend but didn’t want to disappoint her either. “Yea,” she lied as she accepted the embrace. “It’s not that big a deal,” she lied again as they parted and began to organize their lockers for the day.

“Well, I’m sure everyone is talking about it. Just a heads up,” her friend warned kindly.

“I figured,” Kenna replied with an unenthused roll of her eyes. “But like I said, I’m over it. Not a big deal.”

The pair chatted for a while before the bell made it ominous ring.

“Off to psychology for us,” Britney smiled as she picked up her bag.

Kenna likewise reached for her bag, but a separate set of hands had already taken them.

“Someone as hot as you shouldn’t have to carry a bag,” came the voice of the big-headed jock.

“Thanks, Jason, but you don’t have to do that,” Kenna said as tried to take her backpack from the boy.

“No I’ll show you how you should be treated,” he debated with a smile.

Kenna could have slapped the boy, but decided it was best to control herself. “Well, you can start by not calling me hot and giving me back my property,” Kenna sneered despite Jason’s attempts to flatter her.

He dropped the bag. “Well it’s a no wonder you are single,” he laughed. “With a bitchy attitude like that.”

Kenna snatched her bag, and Britney grabbed her before she could make any more conversation. “Forget him,” she whispered. “He’s probably just trying to get in your pants. That’s what he does, goes for girls after break-ups, when they are all emotional and stuff.”

Kenna nodded and tried to blow it off, but as she did, Jason’s footsteps came back up behind them.

“Sorry, KennDoll,” he apologized half-heartedly. “Let me make it up to you? I’ll take you out tonight? Then my place after?”

“Jason, you might be good at rebounding in basketball, but Kenna’s not interested,” Britney scoffed, taking the words right out of Kenna’s mouth.

“You sure KennDoll?” he asked. “Just give me a call!” he continued before Kenna could make a rather rude answer. For as he said it, he began at a rather fast pace away from the pair and towards his first hour class.

“Pft,” Britney blew her hair away from her face. “I’ll never understand people.”

“No kidding, yet off to psychology we go,” Kenna replied growing more at ease once Jason was out of eye-shot.

And for a few classes, nothing too explosive happened. Kenna knew people were talking about her by the way they stared during work time, but figured that at least they weren’t constantly confronting her about the break-up. But what was perhaps the most fortunate happening was that Bryce was sick from school that day. Kenna had no idea how the ending of her relationship with Jon would affect the somewhat close friendship she had with Bryce.

No, she didn’t sit with Bryce at lunch or anything, but honestly, he was probably her second best friend behind Britney. The three of them had formed somewhat of a trio in several classes, always working together and chatting together. She thought Bryce was quite a character, and everyone really seemed to love him.

Kenna certainly liked him. And so did Britney. And so did Jon. Unfortunately, she didn’t know if she’d be able to look at Bryce without thinking of his asshole of a brother, the asshole who showed her happiness then so suddenly ripped it away from her. It wasn’t a good thought.

With that in mind, Kenna made her way to her locker, still feeling more sluggish and depressed than she had earlier that day. As she swapped out some book and placed her bag in the fortress before lunch, she heard someone approaching her from behind.

“Hey.” It was Chelsea’s voice. And to Kenna’s surprise, it sounded somewhat sympathetic and kind. Or at least it did until Kenna turned around to face the witch and saw that smirk settled quite cozily upon her snarky face.

“Can I help you?” Kenna asked with the usual sarcasm.

“No,” Chelsea sneered. “I actually wanted to apologize. I didn’t realize that you and Jon were still together when he and I started talking on Friday.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Kenna shot back at the blond with sudden aggression.

Seeing Kenna get worked up would only work to Chelsea’s advantage. She smiled wickedly, “Just Jon and I are pretty much together. Sorry, I thought you should know. After all, he liked you for a whole thirty seconds.”

If Britney hadn’t stepped in between them, Kenna was certain that she would have smacked the brat clean across the face. “Oh shut up Chelsea,” her friend chimed in just in the nick of time. “Go take your slutty ass to someone who wants to hear it.”

“So Jon?” she laughed, her laugh worse than the cackle of any hyena.

Kenna jumped at her, and the blond backed up quickly. Britney, of course, had a tight grip on Kenna’s sleeve at this point. “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” Britney replied with a composed sneer.

Chelsea smiled and waved at the pair as she began to walk by. “Toodles,” she snickered as she made her way towards the cafeteria.

Kenna still stood there with fists clenched and fully aware that she would be late for lunch.

“Just ignore her,” Britney sighed as she released her friend from the hold. “She’s just trying to get to you. I doubt she’s even talked to Jon.”

Kenna nodded but her fists remained frozen, and her shoulders remained tight.

Seeing that the girl was still worked up, Britney added, “We need a code word.” Kenna was immediately confused by the statement, which of course distracted her from her anger. “You know. Like if I ever act like that, you need to say something to snap me out of it. Or vis-versa. You know? A code word.”

At the suggestion, Kenna unclenched her fists and felt herself relax into her typical hunch. “So a code word for if one of us is acting like that witch?”

“Yep!” Britney smiled. “That’s exactly what I mean.” They both stood there trying to think of something that would suit such a scenario.

It was Britney’s eyes that began to dance in victory after neither came up with an immediate answer.  “I’ve got it!” she announced with the snap of her fingers. “Jelsonea!”

“Jelsonea?”

“Yea, it’s like a combination of Jason and Chelsea, the two people in this school that neither of us can tolerate for more than a minute,” Britney laughed as she explained the thought.

Kenna appreciated the explanation and gave it an approving nod. “Jelsonea it is!”

Kenna respected her friend’s sentiment as they began to lunch together. And fortunately, things seemed to look up from that point as the second half of the day passed quite uneventfully compared to the first. Nevertheless, Kenna practically jogged out of the building when the final bell rang as she was unable to hide her need to escape.

Everyone. Chelsea. Jason. Everyone. Even Britney. And Jon…

Jon?

As she looked up, she saw a rusted white truck parked just across from her vehicle. It didn’t take a genius to figure out whose truck it was. The only question was as to why it was there.

Kenna stopped in her hurried tracks. The last thing she wanted was a reminder of the rejection, the awful, unforeseen, heartless rejection she’d received two evenings prior.  Yes, the last thing she wanted was to see Jon and his smug little face.