Idempotency (53 page)

“Yes it is. Speaking of which, congratulations on the engagement. I couldn’t be more happy for you. Kristina, on the other hand . . . I feel sorry for that poor girl.”

“Yeah, I don’t know how I managed to end up with someone like her. I lucked out, that’s for sure.” Dylan looked sideways and ran his hand over his hair.

“You guys thinking about children someday?” Frank asked.

“Yeah, she better pop out some kids. We’ll have a problem if she doesn’t,” Dylan joked.

Frank took a large swig out of his glowing glass, then said, “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were the one brainwashing her instead of her helping you out with your own brainwashing.”

Dylan laughed. “So you heard Kristina’s working with me?”

“Yeah, well, I heard Miss Hollerith took a job with NRS, and some rumor about debugging some new error from a trial. Then I hear you had some memory issues recently. I pieced it together. Speaking of which”—Frank turned the tables effortlessly—“let’s talk about that: What happened to you, man? I heard something transpired while you were visiting an NRS facility in Mexico? Why the hell does NRS have a Mexican presence anyhow?”

Dylan ignored the last question. “Yeah, nothing major, just a relapse from my initial trials brought on by a specific sensory pairing, a song and a smell that occurred simultaneously. That’s all it took to scramble the puzzle in my head.” Dylan had given this response a dozen times without thinking twice, but this time he was paranoid his clairvoyant friend would question his veracity.

Frank Cunningham sat back slowly in his chair and crossed his arms. He stared Dylan in the eye for several seconds without blinking.
He knows
, thought Dylan as he busied himself by allowing his left hand to assist him with a drink while his right hand continued to fidget in the pocket of his suede jacket.

Without warning, Frank broke the intense quiet and sat forward. “Look man, it’s been great catching up . . .” He raised his glass and chugged a few final gulps. “But I gotta get back to my room. Rose is waiting for me to holoVid with her—”

“Wait a minute, her name is Rose?” Dylan laughed uncontrollably.

“How dense are you, Dylan?”

“Pretty dense, apparently.”

“Fuck yeah, you are. Anyways, I got this SolipstiCorp demo unit upstairs, gonna try out a round of virtSex with the woman. But I gotta go prime the engine before I call her, so I better get a move on.”

Dylan flinched. “As usual with you, that was one sentence too many.”

“Aw, poor Dyls. You’re jealous, aren’t you?” Frank had a pained expression as he stood up and began to put on his jacket. “You’re jealous that I’m finally a taken man. I’m claimed. Off the market! You had your chance, buddy. Remember that time in Miami?”

“Okay, okay, get the hell out of here already.” Dylan stood up to see his friend off. Frank held out his right hand, but Dylan just stared at it and said, “Sorry, germs.” He shrugged and his hand remained in his pocket.

“Fuck you, asshole,” Frank blurted before whacking Dylan on his shoulder. “Take care, buddy.” He paused and looked Dylan up and down. “And . . . if you need anything, or—ah, shit, you’ll be fine. I’ll be seeing you around the office, I guess.”

“Yep, sure will.”

Frank headed out the exit and Dylan slumped back into his cavernous burgundy chair. His left hand fidgeted with his glass while his right hand fidgeted in his pocket. Staring at the liquid in his drink, he wondered what drove Frank to be so obscene. He hoped for Frank’s sake that the man was truly in love, but he doubted it. More likely, he would use this woman like he had all of the others, then simply move on. The crass, careless act cheapened the gift that was love. It was filthy, really.

Dylan reached for his glass and then paused. His right hand had found its way out of his pocket and now sat on the table, outstretched in front of him, holding a trinket. He looked down and saw an ivory figurine of a baby Jesus on a cross. The trinket seemed to be stained with a dark color. For the life of him, he couldn’t recall where he had picked it up.

Raise your glass to the hard-working people

Let’s drink to the uncounted heads

Let’s think of the wavering millions

Who need leaders but get gamblers instead.

— Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, “Salt of the Earth”

First off, thanks for reading my book,
Idempotency
. Time is valuable. I know this firsthand, as I do most of my writing after midnight. Reading a book is a
huge
commitment of time, and if you made it through mine, I sincerely thank you and hope this book served to entertain you.

Second, if you enjoyed this book, check out my other books on Amazon.com:
amazon.com/author/josh
.

At the time this novel is published, I will have worked at
Amazon.com
for almost five years. I’ve spent that entire time working on software for independent authors (mostly as a software manager; check out our indie author website here:
kdp.amazon.com
). This is something I’m very passionate about, as I consider myself one of them. This book was peppered with references about software development, and many of those references were unique to Amazon (Google Amazon’s leadership principles—they appear in this book several times). In writing
Idempotency
, I wanted the chance to pen my own prognostication of the future, spun with the spirit of technology present. I hope I’ve done that.

Thanks to my friends and family who have put up with my crazy writing over the years. As noted, I write at crazy times (due to my crazy job at Amazon), but when not writing after midnight, I can often be found writing with family frolicking around me, doing family things (as they were tonight at my mom’s “Christmas-Cookie Party”). So thank you. If you are wondering, yes, that includes you.

I’d especially like to thank my two best friends from preschool, who also happen to be my most loyal and honest beta readers: Dave (my best man who never was) and J (check out our blog:
JoshAndJ.com
).

As an indie author who’s written a few books now, I can’t recommend using an editor enough. There are many different types of editors out there, they are all useful. Beta readers are great—and necessary—but professional editors make a world of difference. Special thanks goes to my story editor, John Paine (
www.johnpaine.com
). The first version of
Idempotency
was crap. Insomuch as version two improved upon version one, that improvement is
vastly
due to John’s efforts and teachings.

Several different copy editors also worked on the final draft. These amazingly patient people helped to clean up my often superfluous word choices, they pointed out Josh’s too-frenetic point of view changes, and they corrected my interminable abuse and misuse of basic grammar rules (I missed that day of school). To them, a big,
big
thank you.

The best thing about finishing a book is the fact that I get to start a new one! I can’t wait. Maybe I’ll write another crazy existential rant. Or I may return to my zombie series—nothing’s better than killing off a boring character. Or maybe I’ll write the sequel to this book (
Nilpotency
). Or maybe I’ll just write something else entirely. I’m really not sure yet, but I’m headed down to my den right now to find out.

If you’d like to know what I’m up to, check out my website,
JoshuaWrites.com
, or follow me on Twitter
@jO2shuaWright
.

Thanks again for reading.

—Josh