If the Ring Fits (14 page)

T
he next few weeks passed quickly. Mary Karen thought more about what her brother had said and convinced herself she’d overreacted. She still planned to ask David about it, but she hadn’t found the right opportunity to bring it up yet.

The twins had started kindergarten and Logan was in preschool three days a week. She should have had more free time, instead it felt as if all she did was spend her days in the van. She drove the boys to school every morning and picked them up every afternoon. There were times she could have used Travis’s help, but his car was a two-seater. The best he could do was to occasionally pick up Logan from preschool.

But Mary Karen didn’t mind. Having Travis as her husband had improved her life and lessened her workload by a thousand percent.

She loaded some breakfast plates and glasses into the
dishwasher and straightened, her back already starting to ache. She’d been up since six, getting the twins fed and ready for school.

Travis had left the house shortly after she’d gotten up. It was his morning to do surgery. After he finished at the hospital, he had a full afternoon of patient appointments. He’d told her not to expect him before six.

“Looks like it’s just you and me today, Logan,” she said to her youngest who’d watched while she loaded the dishwasher. “What would you like to do today?”

“Go to the park!” he shouted.

“Shh.” Mary Karen brought a finger to her lips. “Remember to use your indoor voice.”

“I want to go to the park and play on the monkey bars,” the little boy said in a more reasonable tone. “Please, Mommy, can we? Please.”

Mary Karen moved to the kitchen window and pushed back the curtains. The fine drizzle that had started to fall during the night was still coming down. Of course, this was Jackson Hole. You only had to wait five minutes and that could change.

“I’m afraid it’s raining outside right now, sweetie,” she said. “If it clears up this afternoon, we could go then.”

Logan thought for a moment and then nodded.

“I could get out your logs,” Mary Karen suggested. “You could build me something.”

“I want to look at pictures,” Logan announced.

It took Mary Karen a second to realize what he meant. Then she remembered the photo albums they’d found in the closet the other day when they’d been cleaning out the spare bedroom, getting it ready for the babies.

That night she and Travis had sat on the sofa with
Logan on his lap and the boys on either side. They’d flipped through the albums, looking at photos. All of the ones they’d looked at had been taken after Logan’s birth.

Travis had been in many of them. Which wasn’t surprising considering that next to her parents and her brother, Travis had helped her the most after Steven had taken off.

“Can we, Mommy?” Logan begged. “Can we look at pictures?”

Mary Karen’s back spasmed and she glanced at the sofa in the other room. Although there were dozens of things she wanted to accomplish today, what would it hurt to put her feet up for a few minutes, flip through some photos and spend a little one-on-one time with her child?

“I think that sounds like a swell idea.” Mary Karen started toward the living room, her eye on the comfy sofa and ottoman. “Why don’t you get an album or two from the bedroom and bring them to me?”

“Okay, Mommy.” Logan’s face broke into a big smile. “I run fast.”

“Walk,” she called out as he raced down the hall.

She lowered herself onto the sofa cushions and watched him disappear around the corner. In his striped long-sleeved T-shirt, jeans and sneakers, he looked more like a little boy than her baby.

Soon, Logan would be caught in the middle between one set of older twin siblings and a pair of younger ones. Mary Karen vowed that he would not get overlooked. She would make sure that both she and Travis gave him the attention he deserved.

“I got a big box.” Logan shoved a shoebox in her face. “Lots and lots of pictures.”

Mary Karen’s heart sank. She didn’t need to slip off the lid to know what was inside. These photos were ones taken when Steven was still around.

“Honey.” She took the box from her son’s hands. “There aren’t any pictures of you in here. These are all pictures of your brothers when they were babies.”

Logan’s blue eyes lit up like the lights on the Christmas tree. He climbed up onto the sofa and settled in next to her. “I wanna see.”

Mary Karen stared at the box in her hands. If she was going to take a trip down this particular memory lane, it seemed appropriate that she would do so on a damp, gray-skied day. She lifted the lid off and placed it on the end table.

Logan reached inside and pulled out a handful of loose photos, handing them to her. “I wanna see baby Connor and Caleb.”

The first picture she held up was taken in the hospital. She had a baby in each arm and Steven was sitting beside the bed. Her mother—or was it her dad?—had taken the family shot.

Mary Karen remembered the photo. Until Steven walked out on her, a copy of this print had sat framed on the fireplace mantel.

Logan giggled. “Your hair looks funny, Mommy.”

Mary Karen smiled. Instead of hanging loose to her shoulders like it did now, her hair had been shorter and layered.

She looked young. Innocent. Happy.

Mary Karen remembered the elation she’d felt over giving birth to two healthy babies. She’d been on top of the world, determined to be a fabulous mother and wife.

Logan pointed to Steven. “Who’s that?”

“That’s your father.” She kept her voice matter-of-fact. While Steven would never be her children’s daddy, he
was
their father. “He lives in Boston. Remember?”

Logan looked at the man with the dark hair and tight smile. He tilted his head. “Why is he way over there?”

At first Mary Karen didn’t understand what Logan was saying. She glanced down at the familiar photo and studied it, trying to see it through Logan’s eyes. Suddenly she understood. It was if she was seeing it for the first time.

Initially she’d assumed Logan was commenting on the fact that Steven wasn’t in bed with her and the twins. But now she saw what he meant. Even though Steven’s chair was beside the bed, he was leaning
away
from her and his sons rather than toward them.

As she and Logan went through the pictures, the pattern continued. It became apparent that even during the years they’d lived under the same roof, in the same house, he hadn’t really been with them. What was worse, she hadn’t even noticed.

By the time they got through the box’s contents, Logan’s eyelids had begun to droop and Mary Karen’s mind was a tangled mess of troubling thoughts and emotions.

Thankfully when she suggested they take a nap, Logan didn’t argue. Mary Karen slipped off his sneakers and covered him with a cotton throw. By the time she brushed a kiss across his cheek, he was already asleep.

Though exhaustion wrapped itself around Mary Karen like a weighted vest, she knew she’d never be able to sleep. Not with images of her and Steven running through her mind. And with them the heavy re
alization that signs of Steven’s unhappiness had been there all along.

He’d said he loved her. Not as often as she’d have liked, but enough that she believed him. Of course, he’d also accused her of trapping him into a lifestyle he’d never have chosen, but those hurtful words were said only when he was angry.

She’d always thought it was her unexpected pregnancy with Logan that had pushed him over the edge. Now, she saw that her marriage had been in trouble from the beginning. She’d been so busy trying to be the good mother that she hadn’t noticed the signs and addressed the issues before the marriage was irreparably harmed.

Mary Karen swiped a shaky hand across her cheeks, surprised when it came away wet. Pulling a tissue from her pocket, she wiped away the tears then moved to the window and stared out into the grayness.

Was she doing the same thing with this marriage? What had David meant when he’d implied he’d had to give Travis a push?

Mary Karen had made it clear from the beginning that she wouldn’t keep him in a marriage he didn’t want. And when she’d found out she was pregnant—and his sense of honor and duty had kicked in—she’d asserted she wouldn’t settle for anything less than love.

Then he’d told her that he loved her, that he wanted to be a husband to her and a father to her boys.

A knot formed in the pit of her stomach. Could he have simply told her what she wanted to hear?

No. No. Travis loved her. That’s why he was with her now. He hadn’t been pushed into this life. He had chosen it. Because he loved her sons and her and their unborn babies.

It was ridiculous to think otherwise. Still, her attempt at a chuckle sounded more like a sob.

She could just ask Travis. But would he be honest? She hated that she had doubts.

Which left David. She would talk to her brother and find out the truth. No matter how painful. Because the one thing she now realized was that sticking her head in the sand didn’t work.

“I can’t believe you lied to get me over here.” David’s blue eyes flashed. “Telling me Logan was running a high fever was a low trick.”

Mary Karen met his gaze, not intimidated by her brother’s annoyance. “I needed to talk with you privately.”

David frowned. “What about?”

“What you said at Nick and Lexi’s on Labor Day.”

“You’ll have to be more specific.” In a gesture that was as much a part of him as the wave in his hair, her brother jammed his hands into the pockets of his well-worn jeans and rocked back on his heels.

He didn’t fool her in the least. The wary look in his eyes told her he knew exactly what comment she meant.

“I made coffee.” Mary Karen turned toward the kitchen, hoping he’d follow, relieved when she heard his footsteps behind her on the hardwood.

While she had to know what he’d said to Travis, she had to admit she was scared. What if this wonderful life she’d been living was merely a house of cards ready to tumble down?

Despite her fear she kept her composure and once she reached the kitchen, she poured David a cup of coffee and handed it to him with steady hands.

He wrapped his fingers around the cartoon-character
mug and took a cautious sip of the steaming brew. “Aren’t you having any?”

“No, because I laced it with truth serum.” Despite the seriousness of the situation, Mary Karen smiled at his startled expression. “Just kidding.”

“Har, har.” David shook his head and took another sip.

“I know this is your day off and that you’re eager to get back to July and the kids.” Mary Karen kept her tone conversational. “I just want you to tell me what kind of push you gave Travis.”

Pulling out a chair, she gestured for David to take a seat. He sat opposite her, placing his cup on the table.

“You and Trav are happy together,” he said. “What else matters?”

For a second Mary Karen was tempted to agree. But knowing she’d spent her first marriage not realizing just how much her husband resented her—and the children—wouldn’t let her walk away.

“Remember when July came to Jackson and lied about Adam’s paternity? When you found out it nearly tore you two apart. But you finding out was the best thing that could have happened.” Mary Karen leaned forward, resting her arms on the table. “Secrets destroy a relationship. I love Travis. I want this marriage to work. But I must know if he’s with me because he truly loves me or simply because he feels obligated.”
Obligated.

She hated the word.

Tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks.

“Don’t cry.” David leaned over and awkwardly patted her shoulder. “You’re making this out to be a bigger deal than it is.”

Mary Karen angrily brushed away the tears and re
minded herself that slugging her brother wouldn’t get her answers. “David, tell me.”

“Let it go, M.K.” He shoved back his chair and stood.

“Don’t even think about leaving,” Mary Karen warned.

“You think you’re going to stop me?”

“I’ll call July.” Mary Karen pulled the cell phone from her pocket and placed it in front of her. “She knows the best thing that ever happened was when that secret finally came out.”

David’s eyes turned dark. She could almost see him weighing his options.

He sat down and met her gaze. “Let’s keep in mind that you were the one who told him you were pregnant but didn’t want anything to do with him.”

“That isn’t how it was.” Mary Karen wondered how she’d suddenly ended up being the bad guy. “I just made it clear to Travis that I couldn’t bring him into my life—into my boys’ lives—if he didn’t love me.”

“You put the guy in a bad spot, M.K. You’re having his baby. He knew you already had your hands full with three kids. What did you expect him to do?”

“I expected him to be honest.” Mary Karen rose and leaned forward, planting her hands on the edge of the table. “You, on the other hand, told him to lie if necessary.”

David didn’t need to respond. The truth was in his eyes.

He reached out to grab her hand, but she jerked it away.

“Don’t touch me.”

“I didn’t tell him to say he loved you.”

“Then what did you tell him? I want the exact words.”

“I can’t remember.”

She reached for the phone.

“I told him he’d better do whatever it took to get back in your good graces.” David slammed his fist against the table making them both jump. “I was furious with him for putting you in this position.”

“Well, I’m furious at
you
for putting me in this position.” She’d been so sure Travis was the one. How could she have been wrong twice in a row?

“What are you talking about?”

“I believed Travis when he said he loved me. I let him move in. The boys adore him. How can I ask him to leave now?”

“Why would you do that?” David looked at her as if she’d sprouted wings. “You love him.”

“But.he.doesn’t.love.me.” Mary Karen stopped and took a steadying breath. “I want more for myself. I want what you and July have. What Lexi and Nick have. For the past couple months I thought I had it. But right now I don’t know what’s true…because my brother
encouraged
my husband to lie to me.”