If We Dare to Dream (13 page)

Though her brothers fully supported her, outside of her immediate family tensions were high. While Kit’s supporters were in an uproar about going through another trial, others were fully backing Andrew Sheehan. Jamie went through her days prior to the trial with her head down, avoiding all newscasts and praying her anonymity would be protected since the local news had taken an interest in Andrew’s side of the story as the date of his retrial approached. Where once he was condemned; now he was venerated. Darren told her during one of their meetings that Andrew had long ago decided to give in to his fate and stop fighting because his hopes were constantly being dashed. The way public opinion turned one way versus the other made Jamie understand why. Her heart ached for the injustice.

During the final days before the trial, Jamie spent time with Andrew’s legal team, preparing for questioning and elaborating on the details of her story. Though she had refreshed her memory when she had written out the account of that evening, she was unable to answer some of the pointed questions they asked her. They advised her very matter-of-factly to only tell what she knew for a fact instead of guessing. It was virtually the same thing Grady and Ted had told her so long ago. Continuing on in his urgent and enthusiastic way, Darren advised her that if she did guess she could ruin her credibility and blow everything.

Jamie shuddered at the thought.

The morning of her testimony dawned dry and hot. She had pulled out her best suit for the occasion the night before, a conservative black pantsuit with a high collared, white silk blouse. To complete her professional look, she swept her thick mahogany hair in an updo. Though she was determined to make a good impression on the jury, she also realized as she lay awake that night that this would be the first time she saw Andrew since they had met on that fateful night. During her drive to the court complex, she worried how that would go. Admittedly, she was nervous about what she was doing and about his reaction to her. Over the last several months of preparation for the new trial, she had not heard from him once, even though she knew that he was very much aware of her involvement in his new case. Darren’s stories of his reluctance to try again had frightened her. In fact, she was not sure if he even appreciated her presence. That her involvement may be causing him additional pain triggered such an emotional response in her that she feared she would turn to jelly if he even scowled in her direction.

The traffic on the highway was light that morning, and she arrived with plenty of time to spare. Adding to her luck, she was able to find a parking spot in the lot adjacent to the courthouse complex, and Hayden was already there waiting for her near the front steps. Despite the early hour, the parking lot and entrance were surprisingly busy, so Hayden had picked a spot to wait off to the side of the steps where he could find shade from the hot Arizona sun under the canopy of a well-established mesquite tree.

His smile was broad when he saw her approach, and she felt a surge of gratitude that he was accompanying her. She embraced him in a tight and grateful hug, taking in his formal attire with measuring eyes. So used to seeing him in his casual clothes, she had never realized how handsome and serious he could be when he chose. His suit was of a good, quality cut, and knowing him she assumed it came from Nordstrom or Dillard’s. The navy silk blend filled out his tall build nicely, so she gave him a sisterly whistle of appreciation.

“Pretty slick, Hayden.”

He chuckled cheerfully. “Surprisingly, I could say the same for you. Work clothes, I presume?”

“Of course. You think I wear this kind of stuff daily?”

“Not even for that slug you’ve been dating?”

Though laughter was the last thing on her mind at the moment, Jamie was so caught off guard when he raised a brow that a short burst of mirth erupted from her stiff lips. “Slug? Really?”

“Sure. He’s an accountant, for goodness sake. Seriously? How stodgy can you get?”

“I’ve only gone on two dates with George,” Jamie protested. “And he’s not a slug. He’s actually a really funny guy.”

“There is no such thing as an accountant with a sense of humor,” he retorted. His chin lifted toward the sky in an arrogant pose. “They are famous for being dry and humorless, tall and thin, with glasses and baggy clothes.”

 “You have not described George at all, you silly snob,” she replied with a smile. “Thanks for that though, I appreciate the laugh.”

She also appreciated his loyalty, for he had taken the day off to support her, even though it meant sitting in the hallway the entire morning. At that moment, she needed all the support she could get despite his teasing.

“I figured as much,” he said with a wink.

“Thanks for coming with me today,” she said.

“Not a problem. I figured you might need a friendly smile.” He nudged her with his shoulder affectionately. “Do you want to get lunch after since we’re both playing hooky from work? You can fill me in on this paragon you’ve been seeing.”

“That sounds great.”

“All right. Ready to go in?”

She nodded. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

Knowing that they had to pass through security screening, Jamie had left everything but her identification and keys in her car. The items that she did bring fit easily in the tray that passed through the x-ray, and she was quickly waved through. Hayden followed close behind, and they stood in the entry in an attempt to determine which room was their courtroom.

People of all ages and sizes, in various shades of dress and socio-economic status mingled around them. To her, it was organized chaos. There were lines at every window, and none of them seemed to have the label she needed for direction. The information desk was not any better, with a sour-looking woman and security guard staring at an elderly gentleman with very little patience. She turned to Hayden.

“Any suggestions?”

“Look for the lawyer?”

“He’d be in the room already, wouldn’t he?”

“Good point.”

While she paused and glanced around, Hayden crossed the wall to a posted list. He grinned at her over his shoulder. “It’s here.”

She scanned the list until she saw the courtroom she needed. A sign above the hallway indicated which way to go, so she tugged on Hayden’s arm and headed down a maze of bland white corridors to the correct room.

“At last,” Hayden said theatrically.

Jamie glanced at the closed wooden door. There was no sound coming from the room, and she wondered if the day’s proceedings had begun. Darren’s secretary had told her that she would have to wait to be called, so she found an uncomfortable-looking wooden bench to sit down on.

“Should we peek in?” Hayden asked, still hovering by the door.

“What if they’ve started already?”

Several pairs of eyes from down the hall swung in their direction. One helpful looking woman nodded toward them. “They all went in about fifteen minutes ago.”

Hayden sent Jamie a look that suggested not believing the woman, but Jamie shook her head and settled back to wait. After throwing her a sullen look, he joined her with a dramatic sigh. Within a minute or two, he was drumming his fingers against his thighs. Jamie rested her head back against the cool wall. Another minute or so later, Hayden’s drumming extended to his feet. The tap, tap, tapping quickly elicited Jamie’s ire.

“Seriously?”

“What?” Hayden protested in all innocence. “I’m bored. I wanted to see the trial.”

“Like that’s going to be any better?”

“Well, better than sitting out here like criminals.”

“I’m not supposed to go in there because they worry that my testimony will be affected if I hear other people speak.”

“This is going to be very boring,” he muttered sourly.

She sighed heavily and sat back again. Sooner or later someone would come find her. Until then they just had to wait. Leave it to her to have her most impatient brother for company. He was bound to drive her crazy by the time she was called.

After a couple of minutes of squirming uncomfortably, Hayden turned back to her. “So fill me in on your new boyfriend. Who is he and what’s he doing hitting on my little sister?”

Knowing he would not let her get off easy, she grimaced. She was not sure what she had been thinking when she had agreed to a second date with George. Perhaps it was that she was lonely. Or maybe she wanted to be friendly to her new next door neighbor. The man was divorced like her, except he owned the house he lived in while Jamie had just signed a lease on a rental in the same sprawling development that Ford, Ian and Grady lived in. There was no spark of passion, but he was nice enough.

“I’m not marrying the guy, Hayden. He’s my new neighbor and we’ve just had dinner.”

“Twice?”

“Yes, twice, but that doesn’t mean it’s anything serious.”

“Good, because you won’t be allowed to marry again until the four of us give you explicit approval.”

Having spoken, Hayden sat back on the bench and crossed his arms stubbornly. Jamie could feel the argument coming on but held her tongue for the moment. Right now she could not think about George or her family’s insistent overprotectiveness. She had to keep it together, even if it meant entertaining her man-child brother.

She sighed. It was going to be a long morning.

***

Though he had spent the last five years stuffing down any dreams that he would be vindicated, Andrew still took extra time with his appearance that morning. With Smack watching on and biting his lips to keep from gushing enthusiastically, Andrew washed up carefully and thoroughly. As he did so, he ignored his young cellie, feeling too nervous to admit that he feared an anxiety attack at any moment and too proud to allow the kid to see his overwhelming nerves. There was a time when he had nerves of steel. Today, he felt more anxiety than he had in even the worst of ambushes. To remain calm, he practiced his breathing and focused on making himself presentable for court.

While he made sure his goatee was trimmed neatly, he reminded his inner optimist that nothing was going to come of this new trial. For at least the hundredth time that week, he told himself that they would still convict him because they had no other suspects and he was the convenient choice. He had to keep the hope down. Then he brushed his teeth three separate times before he was convinced they were clean enough.

“You’re not going to have any gums left,” Smack commented wryly.

Andrew scowled at him. “At least I have teeth.”

Laughing aloud, the kid wiggled his brows suggestively. “So you’ll let me know if the chick’s still hot, right?”

“Shut up, Smack.”

“Ah, c’mon. I have needs, too.”

Andrew could feel himself bristle, but he could not exactly fathom why. He had only met the woman once. But she was the single person that held the keys to his life in her hands, and he had spent many nights fantasizing about her return. For all his dreaming, apparently he felt as though he knew her well. Now she was here, and he was both nervous and excited to see if his memory had played tricks on him or not.

When he did not answer, Smack’s brows rose in surprise. “Okay, I get it. Hands off, right?”

“Whatever you say,” Andrew muttered.

“I get it… I get it. It’s all cool.”

Andrew resumed ignoring the kid and finished his preparation, completing his tasks with enough time for the guards to escort him outside to the waiting bus.

Every day that he made the journey to the courthouse was like a breath of fresh air. Though his first trip in a vehicle after so long had been surprisingly uncomfortable from the resulting nausea, he felt his spirits rise over his carsickness at breathing prison-free air. Despite being shackled, it was the most freedom he had enjoyed since he went in. His eyes scanned either side of the road eagerly, and he was amazed at the changes in the East Valley in the almost five years since he had been outside the walls of the prison.

Gold Canyon, once a small retirement community, now sported a shopping plaza and a few restaurants. Apache Junction, the city where his grandmother lived, now had housing developments lining the highway, and East Mesa was built up with a new strip mall and theater. These changes were just what he could see from the highway. He could only imagine how different things looked deeper into the respective cities. How fast things had changed.

It saddened him that he had missed all of the growth. Yet hidden deep within the recesses of his mind was the dream that it would not be long before he was once again out and about with these people, his new neighbors. No sooner did the thought escape than he was pinching himself as a reminder of his raising spirits.

Any glimmer of hope was tamped down again when he reached the prisoner access and was escorted in like the criminal he was labeled. Out of everything that had happened to him, all the wrongs he had faced and dealt with, that was the thing he hated the most. He was not a criminal and never had been. He loved and fought for his countrymen and women; he had put his life on the line to protect them. But none of these people cared or believed him. When the tide had turned, every last one of them looked at him as some kind of a monster, including his own brother who had chosen his career over his flesh and blood. His prior service and dedication to protect was forgotten, and in its place it was said that his duty had driven him crazy. Now he was the lowest form of life in the United States, and that had been the excruciatingly bitter pill to swallow.