Read If Wishes Were Horses Online
Authors: Robert Barclay
C
ELIA WARD SIPPED
her iced coffee then languorously crossed one leg over the other. She turned and gave Gabby an inquisitive look.
“So tell me,” Celia said. “How are you and your cowboy getting along since your unbidden trek through the mansion?”
As she remembered accidentally violating Krista's study, Gabby sighed. “Let me guess. An inquiring mind wants to know.”
From behind her sunglasses, Celia winked. “You bet!” she answered.
Before answering, Gabby looked across Celia's well-tended lawn and flower garden. Butterflies hovered among the colorful blossoms. A squadron of wild Dutch parrots yammered noisily at each other as they careened through the air, gone as quickly as they had come. Before the garden lay Celia's swimming pool, its
turquoise water shimmering brightly beneath the hot Florida sun.
Gabby and Celia were wearing swimsuits and lying on loungers on Celia's back patio. As was often the case, the two women were sharing a well-deserved Sunday afternoon away from Jefferson High. Gabby very much wanted to go for a swim, but she knew that wouldn't happen until the ever curious Celia had gotten her answers.
Gabby sipped her iced tea then put it down alongside the remains of the crab salad she and Celia had shared for lunch. As she thought about Wyatt, she shook her head.
“I'm not sure how to answer you,” she said. “Despite what happened, I'm more attracted to him every time I see him. Sometimes it hurts just to be near him. But I have no idea what he thinks about me. Ever since that unfortunate moment in Krista's study, he's been distant.”
“I'm sorry, Gabby,” Celia said. Looking for solace from a female friend, Gabby had told Celia about the incident the same day it had happened. “From what you tell me, it must have been a very difficult moment.”
Another week had passed since that fateful afternoon, and the second month of the New Beginnings Program had begun. After eight more weeks, there would be little reason for Gabby and Trevor to visit the ranch. The grains of sand were slipping through the hourglass that she and Wyatt shared; and even faster now, it seemed, since that incident. To her dismay, she felt powerless to stop them.
As Gabby had told Celia, Wyatt remained standoffish. Gabby was not offended by it because she realized that had their roles
been reversed, she would feel the same way. But she badly missed the fragile warmth that had once existed between them, and she desperately wanted it back.
During dinner that first night, Ram had brazenly suggested that Gabby and Trevor stay and eat with them after every session. But Gabby feared that doing so would be too much, and so she and Trevor usually shared dinner with the Blaines only on Monday nights.
Despite Wyatt's coolness toward her, she had come to love those precious times at the great table, the breeze rustling the silk curtains and Aunt Lou serving her wonderful food. Ram and Aunt Lou sometimes told stories from Wyatt's youth. They were the only times Gabby saw Wyatt blush, and she found it endearing.
“And Trevor?” Celia asked. “How's he doing with the New Beginnings Program?”
At last a topic had surfaced that Gabby could smile about. “I can already see a difference in him,” she answered. “He hasn't totally abandoned James Dean, but it's a start. He's happier and more focused. He's learning to barrel race, but by his own admission his progress is slow. I haven't watched that because the thought of it makes me too nervous. Although Trevor doesn't like the group-therapy sessions, I think they're helping. Along with the horse assigned to him, he's taking care of a pregnant mare named Sadie. Because of that, Trevor and I are usually the last guests to leave the ranch. Sometimes we stay for dinner.”
Gabby's comment about dinner flashed brightly on Celia's radar. “What was that last part?” she asked.
“You heard me,” Gabby answered.
“Despite what happened between you and Wyatt?”
“Yes,” Gabby answered. “Ram insists on it. He can be very persuasive, to say the least.”
Celia yanked her sunglasses down and shot Gabby a sly look. “Well, thank heaven for dear old Ram!” she exclaimed. “But it's time to fess up, girlfriend,” she said simply. “What's really going on with you and Wyatt?”
And there it is,
Gabby thought.
The ultimate question.
She closed her eyes for a moment. “I'm not sure,” she answered. “Despite what happened, I think I'm falling for him. And it's kinda scaring me.”
This was the first time she had fully admitted it to anyone, including herself. Her confession was liberating, and also terrifying. As she examined her feelings, a quick shudder ran through her.
Celia smiled. “High time you admitted it. It's been written all over you.”
Gabby reached out and took Celia's hands in hers. “What should I do?” she asked.
“You must tell him,” Celia answered.
Gabby shook her head. “I can't,” she protested. “He's not ready to hear it. Especially now, after that faux pas of mine. Plus, he still wears his wedding ring. More than anything else, that tells me he's not ready to let Krista go. And there's something moreâsomething I haven't even told
you
.”
Celia raised her eyebrows. “What is it?”
“He still leaves the church service every time Reverend Jacobson performs the blessings. Five years later and he's still grieving. Maybe he always will be.”
Gabby again gazed out at the inviting pool. “Besides, it was you who warned me that just because I'm ready to move on doesn't necessarily mean that Wyatt is, too,” she added softly. “I have to remember that.”
“So you still go to church every Sunday?” Celia asked.
Gabby shook her head. “Not since that day Wyatt took me and Trevor to brunch. It would be too awkward, especially now. Maybe I never will.”
“I can understand that,” Celia said. “But if you're not attending church, how do you know that Wyatt still leaves early?”
“I called Reverend Jacobson and asked him,” Gabby admitted. “You
didn't
!”
“I did,” Gabby answered. “He told me that if Wyatt ever stays for the entire service, or if by some miracle he comes forward to take the blessings, that he'd let me know. It seems that the good reverend has taken an interest in us.”
Celia laughed and slapped one knee. “Gabbs,” she said laughingly, “you've finally restored my faith in your feminine wiles!”
T
HE FOLLOWING DAY
was Monday, the start of the sixth week of New Beginnings. The sky was dark, threatening to make good on its promise of rain. Like usual on program days, Ram and Wyatt sat on the front porch in their rockers, waiting for everyone to arrive.
Thinking, Ram sat back and lit a cigarette. For some reason, he always cogitated best while smoking. He smiled as he wondered whether nicotine had anything to do with increased mental clarity.
Makes me wonder what all those fool doctors might have to say about it,
he thought.
Next time I see mine, I'll have to ask him.
Ram's mind soon turned to other matters. All the prior week he had wanted to talk to Wyatt about what had happened in Krista's study, but he was unsure about whether to do it. It was obvious that Wyatt's attitude toward Gabby had cooled, and Ram just as
easily recognized that Gabby felt hurt by it. But anything having to do with Krista's study was always a touchy issue for Wyatt. If Ram brought it up, he would have to tread lightly. Then he thought about it some more, and he scowled.
Tread lightly, my ass,
Ram thought.
If he gets mad, so be it.
Deciding to throw caution to the wind, he looked over at his son.
“I'd like to talk to you about something,” Ram said.
Wyatt put his boots on the porch railing. “No need,” he said. “I already know what you've got in mind. It's my business, not yours.”
“Maybe,” Ram answered. “But how could anything that's so clearly bothering a son of mine
not
be my business?”
Wyatt looked over at his dad. “You're going to get into this whether I want you to or not, aren't you?” Wyatt asked.
“Yep,” Ram answered.
Wyatt sighed. “Then say your piece and get it over with,” he said.
“You're being too hard on her,” Ram said. “She didn't do anything wrong. And she sure as hell didn't know what was in that room, or what it means to you.”
Wyatt uneasily shifted his weight in his chair. Ram was right on both counts, even though he didn't want to admit it. Gabby had upset his orderly world yet again. And because he didn't know how to deal with it, he felt uncomfortable around her.
“Is that all?” he asked his father. “Please tell me that this is the end of the lecture.”
“No,” Ram said, “it isn't. You've been so self-absorbed lately that you've totally missed something else of importance.”
Wyatt scowled. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“I'm talking about Trevor,” Ram replied. “Given the way you're treating Gabby, you're running the risk of making her so uncomfortable that she might stop bringing him to the ranch. Besides, I've grown to like that kid. I'd hate to see her yank him from the program just because of your attachment to a bunch of old mementos sealed up in some dusty room.”
Ram dropped his spent cigarette to the porch floor and crushed it beneath one boot. “There, now I'm finally done. So if you want to be angry with me, go right ahead. But you're wrong on this one, son, and deep down, I think you know it.”
As usual, Ram's bluntness carried the unmistakable ring of truth. Wyatt had also come to like Trevor. And like Ram had said, that part of it hadn't occurred to him. But it should have, he realized. If Gabby pulled Trevor from the program because of him, Wyatt knew he could never forgive himself.
But this was about far more than just Trevor. Deep down, he knew that he had been too hard on Gabby, and his behavior bothered him. Even so, her unconscious violation of Krista's study still weighed on his heart. He suddenly felt the need to go someplace where he could be truly alone, to sort though his feelings in private. And only one place would suffice.
Instead of waiting to greet Gabby and Trevor on the porch, Wyatt stood and walked into the house. After striding down one of the hallways, he stopped before the door to Krista's study.
Pulling his key ring from his jeans, he selected the one he needed and unlocked the door. After Gabby's intrusion, Wyatt had locked the door and kept the key. The door squeaked with familiarity when he opened it and walked inside.
As his eyes scanned the drab, dusty room, it seemed to yawn back at him. He walked to the window where he and Gabby had stood, and he gazed out at the darkening clouds. A flicker of lightning flashed on the far horizon, its brief appearance a sharp, silver zigzag against the battleship gray sky.
He then looked down at the windowsill. The photo album he had taken from Gabby's hands still lay there, exactly where he had placed it one week ago. In the fading light he saw his and Gabby's fingerprints commingled on top of the dusty album cover. Seeing them together like that suddenly tugged at his heart, and his path became clear.
Wyatt turned and walked back to the door. Leaving the room, he closed the door behind him and again reached for his key ring, thinking. This time he left the key in the keyhole, and the door ajar.
Â
HE FOUND GABBY
in the foyer, chatting with some of the other parents. When he walked up to her, she did her best to smile.
“Do you have some time for me?” he asked.
“Sure,” Gabby answered.
“Let's talk in the gazebo,” Wyatt suggested.
“But it's about to rain, isn't it?”
A brief smile crossed Wyatt's lips, the first he had shown Gabby in a week. “Then we'd better hurry,” he answered. As they walked away, several of the other parents watched with obvious curiosity, while others reacted by rather urgent whispering among themselves.
A white, ornate gazebo stood about fifty yards southwest of the big house. Ram had ordered its construction ten years ago, and its octagonal shape held a matching bench that ran all around its inside wall. As rain clouds continued to gather, Wyatt and Gabby scurried toward it.
“Whew!” Gabby said, catching her breath. She sat down on one of the eight short benches just as the rain started falling. “That was close.”
Wyatt sat beside her. “Yes,” he answered. “But we'll be okay here.”
Gabby turned and looked at him. She couldn't know why he had brought her here, but that didn't keep her from hoping.
“What did you want to say to me?” she asked.
The rain came harder now, falling in dense, waving sheets. A short clap of thunder resounded across the sky.
“I want to apologize for the way I've treated you this past week,” Wyatt said. “It was wrong of me, I know. Please forgive me. I was just trying to make sense of it all. You did nothing wrong. Even so, I reacted poorly.”
Those were the words that Gabby had been longing to hear. Her heart relieved, she smiled.
“There was never any reason to forgive you,” she answered. “What happened was my fault, not yours.”
“Thank you,” Wyatt said.
His conscience finally unburdened, Wyatt looked searchingly at Gabby, almost like he was seeing her for the first time. He sat beside her like that for several moments, luxuriating in her presence but saying nothing.
Gabby smiled at him again before looking out at the weather. It seemed to be abating a bit. In Florida, such brief but strong storms were a fact of life.
“Do you think we should go back,” she asked, “or stay here for a while?” Although she had given him the choice, she knew which answer her heart preferred.
“Let's stay,” Wyatt answered.
After a time, the rain finally stopped. Without talking further, Gabby and Wyatt watched as dappled sunshine gradually returned. They each knew that nothing more needed to be said just now, regardless of what the future might hold for them. It was Gabby who finally broke the silence.
“Let's go back,” she offered. “Everyone must wonder what's become of us.”
Wyatt nodded his approval. Soon they were walking unhurriedly back toward the big house, their boots becoming wet with fallen rain.
From his vantage point behind an upstairs window, Ram smiled as he watched them return.