In Denial (17 page)

But now she was having trouble making eye contact. They had eaten their breakfast in silence, the only noise in the dining room the clink of cutlery on china, and cups being replaced in their saucers. Adam assumed his father had made his mother aware of what had already been said before he was invited into the house for breakfast. Invited? There had been a time when he could have walked in and out at will, but not now. Had he really become a stranger in his parents’ house? Had he been a stranger since the day twenty-one years ago when his mother had found Lucinda and him in bed together?

Adam placed his knife and fork as quietly as he could on his plate before picking up his napkin and wiping his mouth. ‘Whether you consider my intent while in Scotland to be the product of a guilty mind or whether you simply couldn’t care less,’ he said, ‘is neither here nor there.’

Joseph’s eyes flickered towards Adam but Christina’s head remained bowed.

‘
I don’t think I need to sit here and try to explain the absolutely devastating affect the loss of Lucinda and the children had on me because we all felt and feel the same. The only difference is that in your minds, as I have now had confirmed, I am very much to blame. You are not accusing me of actually mutilating my own family but you are blaming me for putting them in a situation where they were victims in the first place. None of us, nor the police, has the faintest idea why they were singled out for such violence but they were and they are gone. I wanted to go too, and I’m not going to go into any more detail, but that way out is no longer an option - not in the immediate future anyway. I have resigned from my job, the house in Ashbourne is going on the market and I’m going to Hong Kong. If you want to know why I’ve decided to go to Hong Kong, I must save you the bother because I don’t know. It’s something I must do. Whether to relive some of the past or to lay some ghosts to rest or whether I’ll find something I’m looking for, I really don’t know. But I did come here today in an attempt to clear the air between us. The way we are now stems back to a day when you discovered that two kids had experimented with their bodies. I don’t think you’ll ever understand the bond which existed between Lucinda and me from the moment you took me into your house. We were never brother and sister, we were soul mates and we became interdependent from that very first day. What we did together and what we talked about would under normal circumstances, I agree, be classified as unusual and unnatural but the circumstances were far from normal. But that was twenty-one years ago. For the last fourteen years, Lucinda, the children and I were normal. We were a very happy family and regarded the future with such optimism. Father has told me that it was you, Mother, who was the guiding influence in allowing Lucinda and me to marry. I thank you for that but, and I do not mean this unkindly, it was inconsequential. The bottom line is that on paper I’m still your son and Lucinda was your daughter. I would prefer to go back to being more than a legal add-on. I would prefer the atmosphere that has existed between us for so many years and has now been buried in the depths of guilt and spitefulness, to be forgotten. We should not allow our weaknesses to destroy us further. We need each other’s strengths.’

Christina lifted her head; tears were streaming over her cheeks. Adam wanted to go round the table and hug his mother, to tell her that his love and devotion for her had never waned, but he couldn’t. There was a barrier between them and what happened over the next few minutes was dependent on what Joseph said or did not say next.

Without looking at Adam, he spoke slowly and almost without emotion. ‘I have one son and his name is Patrick.’

The three of them sat in silence.

In those nine words Joseph had put his obstinacy beyond recovery.

For the last hour Adam had been a stranger in his parents’ house.

‘
Mother, Father,’ Adam said, slowly rising to his feet, ‘I came here today with the best of intentions and prayed that we could recover some of what we used to have. It is now evident that even after the children were born and we came here so often, your attitudes towards me were just
façades.
The intense hatred I feel in this room is unbelievable but it is only in one direction. I will never regard either of you as anything but my mother and father but I suppose in losing you as well as Lucinda and the children my punishment is complete. Thank you for at least seeing me. I will not darken your doorstep again.’

As Adam left the dining room he did not see the tears well up in his father’s eyes as he covered Christina’s hand with his.

*  *  *

Adam settled on an asking price of just over half a million pounds.

He wasn’t at all happy about selling the house but once he’d been as ruthless as possible in disposing of its contents - which meant the local charity shops had benefited considerably - the house seemed to lose much of its character. It was no longer
them
; it was no more than four walls of bricks and mortar.

He still had his small flat in London.

A lot of the furniture went into storage in anticipation of needing it again at some later stage. He was aware that each time he looked at a particular chair, straightened a curtain or dusted the top of a dresser, he would remember.

But that was precisely why he was going to Hong Kong.

He wanted to remember.

*  *  *

As Adam boarded Cathay Pacific Flight CX252 bound for Hong Kong at twelve noon on Monday, Gabrielle Brooks was getting into her car to start her journey into the unknown. The first part would not be unfamiliar because she had often driven the thirty miles to Rutherglen, a suburb of Glasgow.

But this time it was different.

This time she had to give her parents a reason for deserting her post for what could be anything from weeks to months while she went on some wild goose chase after a man who - she admitted to herself lying in bed the previous night - she did not really know. She knew a lot more about him than he did about her, and she could relate to his reasons for wanting to end it all, but she could not say she knew him; she could not say what really made him tick.

But face her parents she must and they were not going to be as undemanding as the Bishop.

*  *  *

Unbeknown to both Adam, as he settled back with the In-flight magazine after the Boeing 747 had levelled off at 35,000 feet, and to Gabrielle as she turned off the M8 at Junction 14 for Rutherglen - still not knowing what she was going to tell her parents - a phone call was taking place that would seal their destinies.

‘
Patrick?’

‘
Yes, this is Patrick Yong,’ he replied sleepily.

‘
It’s your father.’

‘
Father! It’s four o’clock in the morning. Where are you? It’s been a long time.’

‘
The lack of contact was out of necessity, Patrick. You know that better than I do.’

‘
Has something happened? Sorry, but this is a bad line. Can you hear me all right?’

‘
Yes, Patrick, I can hear you as well as I need to. He’s coming to Hong Kong. He might even be on his way already.’

‘
When you say he, I presume you mean Adam. He’s coming to Hong Kong?’

‘
Yes.’

‘
Does he suspect anything?’

‘
He has made no connection between what happened and Hong Kong. Why would he?’

‘
So why is he coming here?’

‘
I’m not sure he even knows that himself.’

‘
So this is a warning to be on my guard?’

‘
Yes.’

‘
I’ll find out what flight he’s booked on and do the necessary.’

‘
Do what you must, Patrick but no harm must come to him. There has been enough killing.’

‘
No, Father.’

There were a few seconds silence.

‘
Are you still there?’

‘
Yes, Patrick, I’m still here.’

‘
How are you and Mother?’

‘
Outwardly we’re all right but we’re dead on the inside.’

‘
It was beyond our control, Father.’

‘
Beyond our control?’ Joseph almost shouted. ‘What happened led to the deaths of my daughter, your sister, and my only grandchildren. It was no accident.’

‘
I must live with it too, Father.’

‘
We must all live with it.’

There were another few seconds of silence.

‘
Do you want me to let you know when he arrives and leaves?’

‘
No, there’s no need.’

‘
Do you want me to -?’

‘
Patrick, I’m only making this call so that you’re aware that he’ll be in Hong Kong. Nothing else has changed.’

‘
Father!’

Patrick was talking to the dialling tone.

It was approaching three o’clock as Gabrielle Brooks found Adam Harrison’s house about half a mile out on the Buxton Road to the north of Ashbourne. He had not given her the exact address but had described the house to her and as it was the only one that fitted the description, it had to be his. To her dismay there was a man knocking a For Sale sign into the ground at the entrance to the driveway.

Gabrielle wasn’t sure what to do.

She found somewhere to park fifty or so yards from the house and watched the man struggling with the sign. Further movement caught her eye as a young woman appeared from the front of the house and gave the man a hand.

Gabrielle’s visit to her parents had, she thought, gone reasonably well but although her mother seemed to understand, she could tell that her father was upset by her decision. She had not told them the whole story, just sufficient detail so she didn’t have to lie.

Getting out of the car she approached the two people who were still having trouble with the sign. She had planned the exact words to say to Adam but now she felt a bit flummoxed.

The young woman turned as she heard Gabrielle approach.

‘
Hold it straight, Jenny,’ the man said, his frustration obvious. He had his back to Gabrielle.

‘
Excuse me,’ Gabrielle said, smiling and peering down the driveway to see if Adam’s car was there. ‘But is the owner in?’

The man stopped hammering and turned round.

‘
What?’ He was in his early thirties, overweight and he was sweating.

‘
I asked if the owner was in.’

The young woman eyed Gabrielle warily. Perhaps in her late twenties, she was a little taller than Gabrielle, with a slightly fuller figure but other than that she thought they could have passed as sisters. Jenny was dressed in a smart blue business suit, whereas Gabrielle was in jeans and a long-sleeved blue shirt.

‘
May I enquire who is asking?’ said Jenny, letting go of the For Sale sign.

‘
My name is Gabrielle Brooks and I’ve always been interested in this property.’ She had no idea where the lie came from or why she felt the need to lie in the first place, but if she’d said Adam was a friend then she would surely know where he was.

‘
We’re his appointed agents,’ the man said, ‘so if you’d like to call into the office we can give you the details.’

‘
Actually, I do know Adam Harrison,’ Gabrielle said, trying to recover the situation, ‘and I do love this house, but it’s him I’m trying find.’

Jenny and the man moved closer together, the sign temporarily forgotten. ‘He’s not here,’ Jenny said. ‘He’s gone away.’

‘
I see. Have you any idea where to?’

‘
No, just that he’s away for two to three months and -’

‘
Did he leave his contact details should you find a buyer?’

‘
We’re to go through his solicitors.’

‘
And they are?’

The two estate agents exchanged glances. ‘I don’t suppose there’s any harm in telling you that. It’s Jacobs and Wrights. They’re on Compton Street.’

‘
Which is?’

‘
Just off Church Street.’

‘
Thank you. You’ve both been very helpful.’

*  *  *

Gabrielle decided she needed to change her tack. She booked into The Station Hotel in Station Road, changed into a plain linen skirt and jacket, applied a little make-up and rather more perfume than she would normally wear, and then went in search of Jacobs and Wrights. She found it sandwiched between a fine wines shop and a hardware store.