In Hot Pursuit (22 page)

Uncle Vern
could be very stubborn when he had a mind to be, Nellie remembered.

By the second
day, Will was anxious to get back to his whale study. Time was running out and
the orca would soon be moving on. Vernon suggested Nellie and Mike stay with
him while Will completed his study, and Will wholeheartedly backed the idea. He
needed time away from Nellie. He'd told her there would be no promises, but for
Nellie he knew that wasn't enough. She loved him, and to Nellie, love meant
marriage.

Before he
cruised off on the
Isadora
though, he
wanted to come to an understanding with her. He wasn't ready to sever ties, but
he couldn't hold her under false pretenses. Marriage was not an option, so the
decision to stay with him would be hers. He also knew he'd have no hold on her.
When the right man came along, she'd go with him and never look back, a thought
Will shoved out of his mind. That evening, Will found Nellie sitting on the
pier, staring across the silver-tipped waters of Strathmore Sound. Will had no
idea what her thoughts had been the past two days as he'd pretty much kept to
himself
. "Can I join you?" he asked.

"I was
hoping you would." Nellie extended her hand for him to take then pulled
him down to sit close beside her. They sat holding hands while listening to
waves lapping against pilings.

Gazing at the
Isadora
, Will tried to dismiss the whole
gruesome nightmare with the gunman, but couldn't. The scene seemed etched on
his mind—Nellie's stricken face and the horror in her eyes, the gun pressed to
her head, a pair of remorseless, faded-blue eyes. And the countdown. The
indescribably, terrifying countdown. "Every time I think about what
happened and realize how close I came to losing you," he said, "I
feel like my insides are being ripped out."

"Good."
Nellie snuggled against him. "At least you care enough to worry."

"That
seems like an odd thing to say."

Nellie looked
up at him. "It does?"

"Of course
it does," Will said. He released her hand and slipped his arm around her.
"You know damn well I care, that I... love you." His heart quickened.
He hadn't intended to say that. He’d never said those words to anyone except
his sister.

While looking
across the water, Nellie asked, "Do you love me enough to marry me?"

Will
anticipated her bringing up the issue of marriage again, but hadn't planned on
dealing with it tonight. The fact that he'd admitted his love changed nothing.
"Having something special for a short time is better than a lifetime of
nothing," he said. "What we have is special, a kind of chemistry I've
never felt with anyone
.
 
But right now we're filling needs in each other's lives, and
needs change."

"That's a
cop-out for not facing why you can't make a commitment," Nellie clipped.
"But since you refuse to talk about it, I keep thinking back on everything
you told me that might give me a clue--your wariness when I said you had the
makings of a father. And when I asked why you never married, you shrugged and
said you were a loner. There's also the vasectomy, a clear-cut statement about
your stance on parenthood. But you won't tell me why."

Will gazed
across the water, feeling the emotional chasm that had slowly been separating
them growing wider. "I told you to leave it be."

"We've
gone beyond that, Will. I can't just leave it be," Nellie said. "But
can you answer at least one question?"

Will shrugged.
"I'll try."

"What,
exactly
, do you want from me?"

Will continued
to stare in the distance, as he replied, "A loving, caring relationship
for however long it lasts."

"That's it?"

"We
agreed. There'd be no promises."

"I may
have agreed at the time," Nellie said, "but now I realize it was a
mistake. For however long as it lasts won’t do for me because I believe true
love's enduring, which means, forever, and that love is sealed with a
commitment of marriage."

"Love is
impermanent," Will said, continuing to stare across the water. "If I
could undo everything that's happened between us I would but I can't. I'm sorry
if I hurt you. I never intended to, but I thought we both knew what we were
getting into."

Nellie stood.
"I still know what I want," she said, "but I refuse to set my
convictions about marriage aside, so I guess we have nothing more to talk
about." Turning, she walked away, and Will didn't try to stop her. And
Nellie faced the realization that for whatever his reason, Will would never
make a commitment to her or anyone else, and somehow, she'd have to come to
terms with that and live her life without him.

***

For the next
two weeks, Nellie tried to enjoy her visit with Uncle Vern, catching up on old
times and getting to know Georgia, but she found her thoughts constantly
returning to Will. She had no idea what to expect from him when he’d return for
her and Mike, or how the trip back to Port Townsend would be, but she held one
last spark of hope that during the time they were apart, he'd come to terms
with his past and want her to be a part of his future.

But when she
saw him again, she knew nothing had changed.

After agreeing
to return the following summer, Nellie and Mike bid farewell to Uncle Vern,
Georgia and Captain Nate, and boarded the
Isadora
.
Nellie immediately felt the tension and frustration of being close to Will.
He'd been particularly reticent since his return, and because they had no
future plans together, she was determined to keep her distance. But the least
she could do was to see that Mike enjoyed the return trip. She would not spoil
it for him.

Once underway,
Mike called down from the bridge, "Mom, come on up."

Nellie felt
uneasy about being in the tight confines of the bridge with Will. His nearness
made her feel vulnerable. Grudgingly she climbed the ladder and found Mike at
the helm, and Will looking over his head. Catching Mike's
Mom-don't-embarrass-me-by-saying-anything
look, she decided not to
make a production out of his tending the wheel. "How's it going?" she
asked, standing close to the window, wanting to keep some distance between her
and Will.

Mike scanned
the water. "Pretty good. We have to keep a look out for deadheads
though—swamped logs on end—they don't show up on radar." He glanced at the
radar screen. "There's something off the port bow about a mile
ahead," he announced.

Will shifted
his gaze from Nellie to the radar screen. "So there is," he replied,
aware that Nellie had been trying to avoid eye contact. And he understood. His
last night in Ocean bay, just before he'd left her there to continue his
research, he'd wandered the deserted streets of town, and during that time he'd
come to realize he and Nellie had reached an impasse. But that didn't change
his desire for her, or his determination to make the trip back special for
Mike. So, a few miles from Beaver Bay, he took over the wheel and turned the
Isadora
into a protected cove, then cut
the engines.

"Come
on," he said to Mike, "let's take the kayak out while the sun's still
high, that is, if your mom says it's okay."

Nellie looked
at Will. "No, I don't think so. Kayaking's too dangerous."

"Don't
worry," Will said. "The water's calm. If anything happens, he'll be
wearing his flotation jacket, and I'll be with him the whole time."

"I don't
know—"

"Geez,
Mom, I'm not a baby," Mike groused.

"I know
you're not, honey, but I'd feel better if you learned kayaking another
time."

"He'll be
fine," Will said, ignoring her warning glance, knowing instinctively it
was right for Mike. "The kayak has float bags and both ends are filled
with foam. It's virtually unsinkable. We'll just be over in the cove, where the
water's shallow, and you'll see us the whole time."

Nellie sighed.
"Well... I guess
it's
okay."

Will ushered
Mike toward the ladder. "Come on," he said, nudging him along,
"let's get going before she changes her mind."

Mike glanced
back at Will, a smile playing about his lips, and climbed down the ladder to
the salon. On deck, Will checked their emergency equipment then he reached for
a length of cord. "Since it's your first time out," he said to Mike,
"you might want to tie your paddle to your wrist with a cord. Just leave
enough slack so it won't interfere with your paddling."

After giving
Mike brief instructions on how to hold the double-ended paddle, they put on
their flotation jackets and climbed into the kayak, Mike forward, Will aft. As
they paddled, Will couldn't decide whether Mike truly wanted to be in the kayak
or whether he'd just been trying to assert his independence from an
overprotective mother. He suspected the latter. "In a kayak you feel as if
you're part of the ocean," he commented, trying to get a dialog going.

Mike glanced
back. "Could a wave turn us over?" he asked.

"Not likely,"
Will replied. "The kayak's designed to ride the ocean swells."

Mike ducked as
spray washed over the bow. He looked back, droplets of water clinging to his
face. "Sorry about that," Will said. "On the bright side, we're
sitting low in the water so we're less susceptible to side winds than if we
were in a canoe. But it's still a good idea to watch for danger signs."

Mike glanced
back, and said, "How do we do that?"

"By
watching for whirlpools, eddies and other areas of colliding currents,"
Will replied, while maneuvering the kayak toward the cove. "But you also
have to be on the lookout for breakers where there might be rocks or
reefs."

"What do
you do then?"

"Steer
clear. Quicken your paddle strokes like this." Will demonstrated with
short strokes. "And by slouching to lower your center of gravity and
increase stability."

For a while
they rode in silence, the kayak bobbing up and down like a cork in a tub as
they paddled in a straight line. Mike was clearly enjoying himself, seeming to
be taking it all in. Then suddenly, he pointed and yelled, "Look over
there! An orca!"

Will looked to
where Mike was pointing. "Not an orca," he said. "A dolphin.
Same order of toothed whales, but slightly different." The lone dolphin
started swimming toward the kayak then dipped beneath the surface of the water,
and moments later, began circling the boat, gliding by in luminescent shimmers.

"It's
Diana," Will said, noting the scar across the dolphin's snout. "I've
worked with her. Sit still and give her a chance to check us out."

Slowly,
cautiously, the dolphin investigated, rubbing against the kayak, and rolling
from side to side. Will reached out and stroked her snout while talking to her
in a quiet voice. Then the animal closed her air holes tightly, moved under the
kayak, and exhaled a terrific blast. Mike laughed with glee as the kayak rocked
back and forth.

Will steadied
the boat. "I see she's still up to her old tricks."

Diana's
explosion of breath punctuated the stillness. She swam up to the kayak again.
Then the surface of the water parted into ripples as she rose, stood on her
tail, and let out a series of short sounds and clicks. "Go ahead. Touch
her," Will said.

Mike stroked
Diana's rubbery nose. She let out another series of clicks. Mike giggled.
"She feels so slippery," he said.

Diana flipped
her tail, hurled her sleek body high out of the water, lunged through the
surface and swam a short distance from the kayak. Then she circled back, and
again swam away.

"What's
she doing?" Mike asked.

Will watched
her odd behavior, but when he heard her distress calls, he looked at her in
alarm, and said, "I think she’s trying to tell us something. Let's follow
her." Paddling the kayak in the direction Diana appeared to be leading
them they followed her across the mouth of the cove toward the opposite shore,
where Diana disappeared.

"We've
lost her," Mike said, disappointed.

Will scanned
the vacant surface of the water. "Maybe not. We'll wait and see what she's
doing." They stopped paddling and the kayak bobbed on the waves. A few
minutes later, Diana appeared again. After circling the kayak several times,
she ushered them toward a tangle of logs and branches in the shallow water near
the shore. As they approached, Will saw something moving within some debris.
"Go easy," he told Mike. "There's something in that tangle of
limbs. We don't want to scare it."

Mike rested his
paddle on the kayak. "What do you think it is?"

"I can't
tell yet," Will said. "We'll let the boat drift in quietly."

Diana swam up
to the tangle while emitting a series of frantic clicks.

"Okay, old
girl," Will said, patting her snout. "We'll take a look."

As the kayak
drifted into the limbs, Mike cried in an excited voice, "It's another
dolphin."

"It must
be her mate," Will said. "She brought us here to help him."

Mike looked at
the thrashing dolphin. "How are we gonna get him out?"

 
"We'll have to cut him loose," Will
said. "It looks like he's caught in a drift net, and I didn't bring a
knife." He looked at Mike. "Did you bring yours?"

Mike grinned.
"It's right here."

Will winked at
Mike. "Good boy. You've probably saved your first dolphin. Meanwhile, we'd
better start cutting him loose."

"How are
we gonna get close enough?" Mike asked.

"The
water's shallow here," Will replied, backing the kayak away from the tangle.
"We'll beach the kayak and wade out." They paddled to the pebbly
shore and climbed out. Will dragged the kayak onto the beach, took Mike's arm,
and they waded through the shallows to where the dolphin flopped helplessly,
while Diana swam back and forth.