In the Wake of the Wind (9 page)

Serafina
shook her head frantically. “I don’t care about his tide. It means nothing to me, just as Aiden means nothing to me. Oh,
why
can’t you leave me alone?” she said in sheer desperation.

“Not until I get some answers from you. You see, I do care about Aiden, very much, and I won’t see some manipulative little hussy malign him, not when he doesn’t deserve your scorn.”

“Is that what he told you, that I’m a manipulative little hussy?” she said, angry tears starting to her eyes. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. He’s probably told half the world the same thing.”

“And I wonder what you’ve told the other half of the world, my lady. That is what I call you now, isn’t it? ‘My lady?’ How very clever of you, to have secured rank and privilege at the price of Aiden’s soul.”

“He doesn’t
have
a soul,” she cried. “He’s cold and unfeeling, and—and a blackguard!”

“Thank you. That answers my question quite nicely,” Raphael said, folding his arms across his chest. “In which case, you’ve just made it very clear why you married him. A charming picture, don’t you agree?”

“You think—you honestly think that I
planned
all of this, that I meant to mislead Aiden into this marriage?” she said furiously. “Oh, you are just like him!”

“Since Aiden is the most honorable man I know, I wonder if I shouldn’t take that as a compliment,” Raphael replied coolly.

“Honorable?”
Serafina
said, glaring at him. “That’s an interesting definition for your friend. I’m beginning to think that all men of rank and privilege have the same overbearing, superior attitude. With the exception of my father,” she added loyally. “At least he was kind and gentle and honest. And if he’d known the nature of the man he agreed to marry me to, he’d have instantly rescinded his offer, of that I can assure you. He
never
would have consigned me to Aiden’s protection, not when he knew that I had nothing else and no one else in the world other than my Aunt Elspeth.”

“Oh?” Raphael said, his eyes conveying an expression of boundless cynicism.

“Yes, and if you think you know any better, you’re badly mistaken. My father cared about my well being, which is far more than I can say about Aiden. He thinks I’m bringing him a fortune. Ha!” she said in perfect imitation of her aunt. “He’s going to have the shock of his life.”

Rafe
fixed her with a hard look. “Either you’ve completely lost your mind, or I’ve lost mine. Or you’re lying. The third possibility seems most likely, since I know my sanity is intact, and you appear a little too bright to be delusional.”

Serafina
drew herself up indignantly. “I never lie,” she said. “That would go against the most basic principles of god and goddess.”

“Oh, that’s it then, to be sure,” Raphael said, drawing one hand over his face. “You’re mad.”

“I’m most certainly not,”
Serafina
retorted, realizing that she’d said a little too much about her beliefs, but refusing to back down now. “What makes you think you have the right of it?”

To her surprise Raphael burst into laughter. “Oh, I’m just a God-fearing Englishman who happens to believe in the dictates of the Church, that’s all.”

“There’s nothing wrong with the Church,”
Serafina
said, planting her hands on her hips. “I sing in the choir every Sunday without fail, as it happens. But that doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with honoring the ancient ways, which have been around far longer than Christianity, I’ll have you know.”

“So you’re a little pagan, are you?”
Rafe
said, looking highly entertained. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, given that you’ve been living in Wales for so long with that queer aunt of yours.”

“My aunt is a perfectly acceptable woman of good breeding, and her religious practices are none of your concern. And it’s very rude of you to call her queer. She is merely eccentric.”

“I beg your pardon,” Raphael said, his smile broadening. “I suppose now you’re going to tell me that the reason you balked at the altar was because you didn’t have a high priestess in attendance? No wonder you looked at the bishop with such displeasure.”

“I did not look at the bishop with displeasure,”
Serafina
said in her own defense. “I’m sure he’s a very fine bishop, and it was no fault of his that I didn’t want to marry Aiden.”

Raphael stared at her. “Now you’re saying that you didn’t
want
to marry Aiden?”

“No, I did not,” she said adamantly. “I thought I did until I saw him, but I changed my mind.”

Raphael stroked the high bridge of his nose with one finger. “Then perhaps, since I’m such a muddled, misdirected fool, you will tell me why you changed your mind upon seeing him. Does his appearance displease you?”

“Don’t be silly. Anyone can see that Aiden is a very handsome man. But he doesn’t love me,”
Serafina
finished flatly.

“I daresay he doesn’t. Like myself, Aiden happens to be of sound mind.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she said indignantly. “Do you think I’m not worthy of Aiden’s love?”

Raphael regarded her steadily. “I have absolutely no idea, he said. “Given your behavior this morning, I’d have said absolutely not. But I confess that now I’m confused. I think I’ll withhold judgment until I have a clearer understanding of this rather peculiar situation.”

“Well, it’s a moot point because Aiden doesn’t even believe in love.”

“He doesn’t?” Raphael said, one corner of his mouth curving up. “Whatever gave you that idea?”

“He told me so himself in no uncertain terms at the very same time that he informed me precisely what he thought of his marriage,” she retorted, goaded out of caution. “It was
not
a pretty description, I can tell you. I am sure you can understand why I’d be disillusioned with him after hearing that.”

For the first time Raphael’s cool control slipped. “Good God …” he said slowly. “You really are a little pagan, aren’t you?” He looked her up and down with a sharp, assessing gaze as if he’d just seen her for the first time.

Serafina
colored in embarrassment, folding her arms around her waist as if that might protect her from his penetrating examination of her person. “I am
not
a pagan,” she said. “I just told you—”

“That’s not what I meant,” he said, running his fingers back through his hair.
“Serafina
… I may call you
Serafina?”
he asked.

She nodded, wondering at his sudden change of tone and expression. He almost—almost—looked pleasant, but she wasn’t prepared to lower her guard for an instant.

“Tell me something,” he said, his gaze direct. “Today in the chapel wasn’t the first time you met Aiden, was it?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” she said, her heart leaping in panic that he might have somehow divined the truth.

“I think you do, and since you say you never lie, I assume you’re going to be honest with me. You didn’t have that particular conversation at the altar, did you?”

“I told him at the altar that he didn’t have to marry me,” she hedged. “And he said he did.”

Raphael’s face lit up with a sudden flash of amusement. “Somehow I’m not surprised. But I’m referring to the other conversation you and Aiden had, which I believe you conducted yesterday afternoon in Rockingham Forest.”

Serafina
paled. “He told you about that?” she whispered, horrified.

“He did indeed,” Raphael said, his eyes alight with humor. “He told me all about it, and I think I’m finally beginning to understand what happened today.”

“If he told you all about it,”
Serafina
retorted hotly, “then you ought to understand why I had a change of heart when I saw whom I was to marry. Your friend is an unprincipled rakehell.”

Raphael threw his head back and roared with laughter. “Oh, I don’t know. Aiden’s done his fair share of adventuring, but I think you’re going a little too far to describe him so harshly.”

“Then the version of events he gave you must have been heavily weighted in his favor,” she said. “I assure you, he did not behave like a gentleman.”

“Well … perhaps not entirely, but what
were
you doing sleeping
alone
in the woods? I’m puzzled by that, especially since you were so close to Townsend.”

“I went for a walk. I fell asleep. I thought I was perfectly safe,” she snapped. “It never occurred to me that a man would come along and try to seduce me, especially when he knew I was going to be married to someone else, and he was too. Which is why I had such a terrible shock this morning.”

“If I’d tried for a hundred years, I never would have come up with such an unbelievable explanation. Whoever would have thought it? No wonder Aiden looked so taken aback in the chapel, poor man. The last person he was expecting was his village girl.”

Deeply offended,
Serafina
drew herself up with all the dignity she could muster. “I’m sorry if your friend feels I’m only good enough to black his boots,” she said, wanting to slap Raphael’s handsome, aristocratic face. “But I assure you, his opinion is of no concern to me, and neither is yours. Good day, your dukedom.”

“Your grace,” he said with a broad grin.

“Oh, I may be a countess now,”
Serafina
said disdainfully, “but there’s no need to give
me
airs and graces.”

She turned and fled, the sound of his laughter echoing after her
.

“R
afe,
thank God—have you seen
Serafina?”
Aiden asked frantically as Raphael appeared in the hall. “She’s vanished. Charlotte said she went upstairs, but she’s not there either. I’ve looked everywhere I can think of…”

“Your bride,” Raphael said, examining his fingernails, “has taken off in the direction of the stables. Or so I observed. You might want to go after her before she abducts one of your only remaining horses.”

Aiden blew out a long breath of relief. Serafina’s abrupt disappearance had alarmed him more than he cared to admit. “Thank you. I don’t think she’s feeling particularly comfortable with her new circumstances.”

The comers of Raphael’s mouth quivered. “No, I would imagine not,” he said. “She appeared a little upended to me.”

“Damn! I wouldn’t have left her for so long, but my father insisted on my signing the blasted marriage contracts immediately, the greedy bastard.”

“Hmm,”
Rafe
said. “I trust they provided everything you were hoping for?”

“Yes, of course they did. Why do you ask?” Aiden said, wondering with distraction whether
Serafina
was capable of sitting any of the mounts. He didn’t even know if she could ride. There was only his gelding, one old nag used to pull the gig, and an unbroken stallion his father had been unable to sell.

“No reason in particular,” Raphael said.

“What?”
Aiden
said, his attention snapping back to his cousin. “What are you talking about?”

“I said I only asked about the marriage contracts out of simple curiosity. Your wife’s not exactly what I expected. Not what you expected either, I daresay.”

Aiden lifted a shoulder, trying his best to look nonchalant. The last thing he wanted
Rafe
to know was that the woman he’d made such a cake of himself over the night before was now his wife, especially when
Rafe
was familiar with every last detail of their encounter. And on top of that he felt like a fool for having complained so bitterly about his prospective bride, only to be delivered what he’d been longing for. “She’s certainly an improvement over what I anticipated,” he said neutrally.

“Anything would be an improvement over a gorgon,” Raphael replied, his face perfectly straight. “She’s a pretty girl, actually, if a little untutored about social matters,” he continued, regarding the toe of his boot as if it held some particular fascination. “But that can be remedied easily enough.”

“I rather like her the way she is,” Aiden said, then realized that might sound too close to his ravings in the inn. “What I mean is that she’s not the witch I was expecting.”

“Possibly not,”
Rafe
agreed. “Of course, only time will tell. One can only hope for the best.”

“Yes,” Aiden said, relieved that
Rafe
accepted his unexplained change of heart without a lot of unwelcome questions.

“It’s a pity, naturally, that we can’t always have what we want, but then wood nymphs are hard to come by.” Raphael rubbed the corner of his mouth.

Aiden’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “See here,
Rafe,
if you think to poke fun at me just because I was in my cups and waxing a bit poetic last night, think again.”

“Poke fun at you, man? Would I do such a thing, especially in this, your time of travail? No, indeed, you were allowed a bit of fantastical rambling in the last hours before your execution, and I was happy to listen.” He regarded Aiden with an expression of deep sympathy that Aiden suspected wasn’t entirely genuine.

“Thank you for your understanding,” Aiden said caustically, wanting to rip Rafe’s complacent head from his shoulders. “It’s kind of you to be so supportive.”

“Only my job,”
Rafe
replied with a wave of his hand. “But you ought to be concentrating on the present and go find your wife before she gets completely away from you.”

“Yes—yes, I’d better,” Aiden said. “Look,
Rafe
… thanks for everything you did today. And last night.”

“Not at all, Cousin. I’m sure you’ll do the same for me should I ever need your services.” He swept a gracious bow, then straightened with a grin. “Of course, since I have every intention of letting my younger brother provide heirs for me, you might be waiting a lifetime or two to repay me.”

Aiden laughed and slung an arm around his shoulder. “All right then. Let me go and chase down
Serafina.”

“That, I think, is an exemplary idea,”
Rafe
said. “I’ll see to the ushering out of your guests.”

Serafina
ran as fast as she could away from Townsend Hall and all it contained, Aiden and his friend included. She would never fit into their world, didn’t even want to fit into their world, not if it was peopled by men and women who regarded virtues like love and honesty as if they were something to be mocked and disdained, who looked down their noses at anyone who wasn’t as elevated as them.

All of her life she’d believed that it wasn’t one’s station of birth that was important, but rather integrity of character; that kindness to others was as much a guiding principle as honoring all living things and acting honorably in accordance.

And yet in twenty-four hours, she had been exposed to an entirely different way of thinking and behaving. In this world, hypocrisy was acceptable; in this world, people were
bought and sold as if they were items to be bartered over at a marketplace.

She couldn’t believe that Elspeth had allowed such a thing to happen to her—Elspeth who followed the old ways to the letter, who had always told her that love and faith would carry her through anything.

The only conclusion she could reach was that Elspeth hadn’t had any idea of what she was consigning
Serafina
to, that she truly believed, as
Serafina
had, that Aiden and his family were honorable people who wanted only the best for her.

It was a lie. Her entire life had become a lie the moment she’d set foot in the chapel and seen Aiden’s face.

Tears streaming down her cheeks, she headed toward the wide stone bridge with three arches spanning the river. On the other side of the river a hill rose gently from the bank and she stumbled up it, her feet slipping on the slick grass.

It flattened out at the top, a small pond sitting in the middle, two swans, one white, one black, floating on its glassy surface. And off to one side of the pond stood an oak tree.
Serafina
stopped dead in her tracks and stared in wonder.

It was the most magnificent tree she’d ever seen, rising majestically toward the sky, its huge leafy branches forming a protective ceiling overhead. The gnarled trunk would have taken at least five men’s outstretched arms to span its circumference.

The tree of life, symbol of the Goddess Hestia herself.

Serafina
moved toward the oak, wanting to feel its massive trunk beneath her hands, as if it could somehow give her solace, could steady her, could help her make sense out of the chaos that whirled inside her head. She pressed her flattened palms against the bark, her fingertips rubbing over the rough surface seeking the life force contained within the wood.

“Dear Hestia, keeper of hearth and home, source of all life,” she whispered, “please,
please
help me to understand why you have sent me to this awful man, why you took my beautiful Dream from me?”

Oh, her beautiful Dream. Adam. Gone forever. Replaced by the truth, which was that Aiden didn’t love her and never had. She had filled her head with fantasies, turning a marriage contract into a beautiful fairy tale of undying love. She was nothing more than a fool—a silly, romantic fool, loving a man who didn’t exist outside of her imagination.

She fell to the ground, burying her head in her arms, her shoulders shaking with heartbroken sobs as all the shock and disillusionment and misery of the last few hours came pouring out unchecked.

In that moment
Serafina
thought she might die of grief.

Aiden stopped briefly at the stables to inquire about Seraing’s whereabouts, learning to his infinite relief that she had gone directly past them in the direction of the river. He hoped to God that in her despair she hadn’t decided to throw herself in. He’d had the same impulse himself only the afternoon before.

Incredibly, today he felt entirely different about life. Instead of black misery, he was filled with exhilaration and gratitude that the one thing he had so desperately wanted the day before had, against all expectation, been delivered directly into his hands.

He’d nearly keeled over at the altar when
Serafina
had appeared, and for a moment he’d thought he was hallucinating when he saw her face, for it hadn’t seemed possible that the abhorrent bride he was expecting had miraculously transformed into his fairy queen.

It had occurred to him in that split second that there might be a God after all, a benevolent God who wasn’t intent on punishing him with one blow after another, but had actually shown some mercy.
Serafina,
on the other hand, looked at him as if he had undergone the exact opposite transformation, her expression of shining expectancy changing into undisguised horror as she registered who her husband was.

He’d wanted to laugh, knowing exactly what she must have been thinking. He still had a thousand questions to put to her, but those could be answered all in good time. All he wanted at the moment was to find her, to reassure her that she hadn’t married the devil himself, even if he wasn’t the Prince Charming she’d been hoping for.

He crossed the bridge, his gaze scanning the riverbanks just to be sure he wouldn’t find her floating among the weeds. But the river and its banks thankfully held no bodies. He knew there was only one direction for her to have followed if she had crossed the bridge, so he climbed the hill toward the pond and the oak tree.

Serafina
sat huddled beneath its great branches, her body hunched over, and he knew by her bent head and the shaking of her shoulders that she was crying.

He wanted to cry himself. Of all people in the world whom he didn’t want to see hurt it was she, and yet by the simple fact of being who he was, he had inadvertently wounded her deeply, delivered that blow of disillusionment that he’d expected to be dealt by a different man.

He walked quietly over to her and kneeling, he gently rested his hands on her slight shoulders.

She stiffened and her head shot up, her eyes wide and swollen with tears. “You!” she gasped, “oh, no—please, go away. L-Leave me in peace, I beg of you…”

“Why do you cry,
Serafina?”
Aiden asked in the low, quiet voice that he used to calm a frightened horse. “Is it really so dreadful to be married to me?”

She shuddered at his touch, and he dropped his hands. “How—how did you find me?” she said, gulping back a sob.

“I was concerned when you vanished so suddenly. I thought you might have taken one of the horses, so I went to the stables. The groom told me you’d come this way.”

Serafina
rubbed her fists over her eyes, leaving smudges of tears streaked with dirt on her cheeks. “I want n-nothing from you,” she said, trying to catch her breath. “I certainly wouldn’t steal one of your horses.”

Aiden smiled, thinking that she looked endearingly like a lost child. “You wouldn’t have had much of a selection to choose from, but I wouldn’t begrudge you. Were you running away?”

“Where would I go?” she said, hanging her head in misery. “You made me a prisoner when you forced me to marry you.”

“Ah, straight to the crux of the matter,” he said, handing her his handkerchief. “Here, wipe your eyes and blow your nose. I think we’d better talk.”

He arranged himself in a sitting position opposite her and drew up one knee, resting his arm on it.
“Serafina,
I can only assume that your distress is because of what I said to you when we met yesterday. I’m sorry about that, truly I am. I wasn’t in the best of moods.”

“Your mood had nothing to do with it,” she said, blowing her nose resoundingly. “You told me exactly what you thought of me in vivid detail.”

“Yes, but then I didn’t know I was speaking to you, did I?”

“It makes no difference to whom you thought you were speaking,”
Serafina
said, twisting the handkerchief into a tight knot. “You spoke the truth about what you felt. You said that I was a scheming harridan. You said you were only marrying me because you’d given your word to your family and that there was no hope for happiness or love. And—and you said I was ugly.”

Aiden couldn’t help grinning. “I did, didn’t I? Well, I was wrong—very wrong. Let’s just say I’d been given some misinformation. Quite a lot of it, actually.”

“Yes, and you’ve been taken for a fool, my lord, on top of that,” she said, glaring at him. “If you think for one minute that I’m going to rescue you from your financial difficulties, then you’re going to be sorely disappointed. I haven’t a penny to my name, so you’ve married me for nothing.”