Inferno Anthology (67 page)

Always?

I felt my face flush. Damn him and his sweet talking ways. Before I could say something back, there was a knock at my door.

“Hey, why are you guys here so early?” I asked, opening the door to see Nicole and Avery standing there.

“Early? This isn’t early. We need to leave in thirty minutes,” Nicole said, stepping past me. “Oh, shit! I didn’t know you were here, Easton.”

“You didn’t?” I questioned, turning around to see everyone standing behind me.

“I thought Avery would have told you,” he replied.

“Well he didn’t,” she said, lightly punching Avery’s arm.

“Wait, I thought you knew he was coming and that is why you were stalling after dinner?” I asked.

“No?” she said, raising her eyebrows at him.

“I didn’t tell her, and it slipped my mind when we got back to her condo,” he said, with a mischievous smile.

“Enough said,” I said, stepping around them to go get dressed.

Apparently we were both having a good time at the same time if you catch my drift.

Easton followed me into the bedroom. “I need to run to my car. I left my bag in there.”

He left to get his bag while I started to get dressed. I was going to the hospital, so they were lucky I even bothered putting on something other than my PJs. I dressed in black yoga pants and a light blue tank top that reminded me of Easton’s eyes. I didn’t put any makeup on and threw my hair back into a ponytail.

I was starting to get nervous. Since Doctor Sam told me about my tumor, I kept thinking about whether or not I had cancer. My life seemed like it was starting to go in the direction that I wanted it to. Easton had come into my life, making me happy. Nicole found Avery, and she was the happiest I’d ever seen her. Bailee was about to graduate college, and everything just seemed right.

I’d cried enough tears in the last five days to last me a lifetime. No matter what the biopsy showed, I was going to be strong. I’d always been the strong one. I couldn’t let people know that I was hurting inside. I tried not thinking about it, but I still hurt. The tumor
needed
to come out even if it wasn’t cancerous—I was tired of hurting.

I was thirty and felt like I was eighty. I was in my prime, ready to get married, have kids and live for seventy more years. Not battle cancer and possibly die. I knew people fought cancer all the time, but what if it was something I couldn’t fight?

After we dressed, Avery drove all of us to the hospital. No one brought up what we were going there for. I think they were waiting for me to say something, but I didn’t want to. My brain was talking about it more than I wanted, and I didn’t need other people doing it, too. I just wanted it over.

I wasn’t only scared about the results of the biopsy, I was scared about having a needle poked into me. After my CT, I met with a surgeon that Doctor Sam recommended, and they looked over the results and told me that it looked like the tumor was on the nerve between my first and second rib. It felt like my shoulder blade, but since it was the nerve, I figured it was all around the area. All I knew was, it hurt like a bitch. The surgeon prescribed me stronger pain medication, and it was actually working. Of course it was; it was a narcotic. At first I felt high from the medication, but now I felt relieved for a short time—four hours to be exact. I was just happy that I was finally getting some relief from the pain.

Easton held my hand the whole way to the hospital, running his thumb across my hand, soothing me without any words. That was the beauty of our relationship. Even though we were new, we felt comfortable with each other. We didn’t need to make conversation. Sometimes words aren’t needed, and he knew that.

Easton grabbed my hand again once we were all out of Avery’s truck. There was still the silence among us, but I didn’t care. They could talk once I was getting my procedure done.

We followed Nicole to the correct department in the massive hospital. I stood in a small line, waiting to be checked in while Easton still held my hand. There was no way I was letting him go until I had to.

After checking in and waiting to be called, it was finally time to go back and be prepped. I looked to Nicole, but she knew I needed Easton, so she didn’t put up a fight. She was my best friend, but sometimes you just needed the strong arms of your man to pull you through.

A nurse led me back into the stark hallway and into a large room with multiple hospital beds surrounded by white curtains. A chill ran through me as I stepped farther into the room. Hospitals always made me nervous. There was just something about them that creeped me out. It was probably the uncomforting white walls—and the sick people.

After the nurse weighed me, she led me to a bed. I grabbed Easton’s hand once I got off the scale and held it tight, not wanting to let go longer than I needed to.

“You’re going to be fine, Baby,” he said, whispering in my ear as the nurse started to pull back a curtain around one of the beds. “I know you’re afraid, and honestly, so am I, but you’re never going to be alone. I promise you. I’m here for you and will be here when you’re done.”

“I know,” I said, looking up into his eyes and giving him a weak smile.

The nurse gestured for me to lie on the bed while she took my temperature. After she got her reading, she gave me a white and blue patterned hospital gown to change into.

“Do you want me to step out while you change?” Easton asked.

“No,” I said, shaking my head.

Even though we had only seen each other naked the night before, I was comfortable with him seeing me change. If I didn’t have to change, I wouldn’t have let go of his hand. I didn’t want to be alone, even if he was on the other side of the curtain.

After I changed, I sat on the bed and used one of the warm blankets the nurse left to cover myself up. Not long after, the nurse came back to run more vitals and then stuck IVs in my arms. Easton let go of my hand long enough for her to get me ready, and then she was gone.

I don’t know how much time had passed, but I finally broke the silence. I needed something to distract me.

“Tell me more about Cheyenne. Is she getting better at softball?”

“I think she is. She’s one of the best, believe it or not, and I’m not just saying that because I’m her father. You should see these girls.” He laughed, shaking his head.

“I would like that.”

“Once you get all better, I’ll take you to one of her games.”

“Okay.” I smiled.

I knew that he didn’t introduce anyone to his daughter. He told me that much the first night on the cruise. I started to tear up as I realized I was more than a fuck to him. He kept telling me that I was
his
Superwoman, but it never registered before. He wanted a relationship with me, and I might be dying.

Another nurse came in—not the one from before. She introduced herself as Danielle and told me that she would be with me the whole time during the procedure. After she checked to make sure that the other nurse did everything correctly, the doctor finally came in.

She wasn’t the surgeon that I had met with before, but a doctor who specialized in biopsies.

After I read over the paperwork that I needed to sign—the paperwork that basically said that they weren’t at fault if I were to die on the table—she started to tell me about the procedure. My hand held Easton’s tight—probably tighter than before.

“First, we’re going to bring you back, and you’re going to lie on your stomach on a CT machine. The reason why we do it on a CT machine is so that I can line you up correctly and see where the mass is. Once I have you lined up, technicians are going to mark you where lasers are pointed so I know
exactly
where to go in. Then we’re going to sedate you, but not so much that you’re completely asleep. Danielle will be with you, and if you feel anything just let her know, and we’ll give you more of the sedative.

“It’s more so you’re comfortable and won’t feel the needle. The needle is a hollow needle and is about the width of the tip of a pen,” she said, showing me the pen I used to sign my paperwork. “Once we get the hollow needle in the correct place, I’ll stick another needle inside of it and remove some of the mass so we can run tests. After that, we’ll bring you back to recovery where you will need to stay at least an hour until the sedative wears off.”

“Will you be with her in recovery?” Doctor Ashby asked Easton.

“Yes,” he said, squeezing my hand and giving me a hopeful smile.

“Alright, let’s go. A nurse will show you to the recovery room.”

Easton leaned down and kissed me lightly, and then I was wheeled through double doors. I waited in a hallway, like a car waiting at a red light. I could hear that someone was in the room already, so I laid in the uncomfortable hospital bed, staring at the ceiling.

After ten, maybe twenty minutes—I lost count—Nurse Danielle stopped at my bed and told me that the gentleman before me was done, and they just needed to prep the room for me, so I waited again. After another five minutes, Nurse Danielle wheeled me into the room. It was even colder than the other rooms I’d been in.

Two male nurses helped me out of the bed like I was an eighty-year-old woman—oddly, that’s what my body felt like. I wanted to protest that I could do it myself, but then I realized that it was probably because of the IVs in my arms. They laid me face down on the table with my arms stretched above my head.

After they got my arms in the appropriate position—which was the most uncomfortable position possible—they untied my hospital gown from my back and moved the table back to start the imaging from the CT machine.

I tried hard not to move at their request, but my arms were already hurting from being stretched awkwardly above my head. Once they got the correct pinpoint, Doctor Ashby started to mark me with a marker. She marked dots on the back of my neck and the sides of each breast.

“Okay, Brooke, Nurse Danielle is going to start the sedative. After a few minutes, I’m going to start.”

“Okay,” I said against the firm donut-shaped pillow.

I couldn’t tell when the needle actually went into my neck. I wasn’t asleep, but I wasn’t lucid. either. I didn’t want to remember the pain of the needle, but sometime later, I felt a pinch. I didn’t say anything. Finally, after what felt like a few more pinches, I spoke up.

“Am I supposed to feel that?”

“No. Danielle, give her a little more.”

I tried to listen to what was happening around me. Tried to listen to Doctor Ashby, but all I heard her say was, “It’s really hard and I’m having a hard time getting a sample.”

*~*~*

Nurse Danielle wheeled me into the recovery room after they put me back onto the bed they brought me in on. As she wheeled the bed backwards into the curtain that was mine, I saw Easton’s sparkling blue eyes looking down on me.

“Hey, Superwoman.”

“Hey,” I smiled at him.

“Brooke, we need to keep you here until you’re able to walk. That should be about an hour. Let me go get you some apple juice. Would you like a sandwich?”

“No, the juice is fine, thank you.”

“So, how did it go?” Easton asked as he reached out for my hand.

“I fucking felt it.”

“You felt what?”

“The needle. I felt the needle. Everyone told me that I wouldn’t feel the needle and I wouldn’t remember the procedure, but I felt it and I remember!”

“Okay, Baby, calm down. Do you hurt now?”

“No,” I said, shaking my head.

“Did you tell them that you felt it?”

“Yeah.”

I saw Nicole and Avery walk in across the room. Nicole waved to a nurse, and I heard the nurse say that I was only allowed one visitor, so she needed to make it quick.

“Hey, how you feeling, B?” Nicole asked.

“I felt it!”

“What?” she asked, looking over at Easton.

“Brooke said she felt the needle.”

“You did?” she asked, looking back at me.

“Yeah, and I heard Doctor Ashby tell someone that it was hard and she was having a hard time getting a sample.”

“Okay, well don’t worry,” she said, patting my free hand. “Doctor Sam and Doctor Bloom will get the results in a week or so. Let’s try to relax until then.”

“Okay,” I said. But how could I relax? I had a tumor!

Nurse Danielle stepped in, looking at my entourage and placed a few apple juice boxes on the tray with a cup of grapes. The nurse, who was talking to Nicole when she first arrived, came over and told Nicole that she needed to leave. Easton still hadn’t let go of my hand, and Nicole had Avery in the waiting room.

“I’ll see you in the car,” she said and kissed my cheek.

Avery waved at me, and then they left. Easton and I talked more about Cheyenne. We talked about Halo and how he needed to hire another manager so that he could take weekends off and see me. I liked hearing him say that.

Three apple juice boxes, a cup of grapes and half a dry turkey sandwich later, I was finally released from the recovery room. Nicole and Avery picked us up at the front doors of the hospital, and then we were off to get frozen yogurt at the insistence of Nicole.

*~*~*

After the guys ate real food and Nicole and I ate our frozen yogurt, I was getting tired, so Nicole and Avery dropped me and Easton off at my apartment. I took a double dose of my pain meds, and then we snuggled on the couch and started watching
Perfect Pitch
. I fell asleep before it got started, but I was happy. I was in the arms of the man I loved, and all thoughts of my stupid tumor vanished.

Easton

A
s I waited with Avery and Nicole for Brooke while she had her biopsy, I realized that life was too short. I wanted to introduce her to Cheyenne. I wanted my two worlds to meet—my two girls to meet. If Brooke had cancer and she couldn’t fight it, then at least Cheyenne would meet a strong woman.

I watched Brooke as we drove to the hospital. I knew she was hiding her feelings—trying to be strong, but breaking inside. I didn’t want to draw any attention to what she was about to undergo, so I just held her hand. Occasionally, she would squeeze it as if she was making sure I was still there. I wasn’t going anywhere—ever.