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Authors: Derek Webb

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‘It's quite famous,' said my dad, matter-of-factly, ‘It's Brunel's.'

‘Brunel's?'

‘He built it. You've heard of Brunel haven't you?'

‘Well, I think so,' I said, not too sure whether I had or not.

‘He was a famous Victorian engineer,' continued my father. ‘He built the Great Western Railway. You've heard of that I assume?'

‘That's the railway that goes over that bridge is it?'

‘It starts in Paddington,' said Dad.

I brightened. ‘Oh, yes, I've been there!'

‘And it goes all the way down to South Wales and the West Country.'

‘Oh, right,' I muttered, not really interested. ‘So this bridge, it's famous you say?'

‘Oh, yes.'

* * *

I couldn't wait to get back to school on the Monday. ‘Whatever's up with you, Robert?' asked my mother as I appeared in the kitchen at half past
seven. ‘Have you any idea what time it is?'

‘Half past seven,' I replied. ‘Can I help myself to some Weetabix?'

‘Yes, here, I'll get it for you,' she said, reaching up into the wall cupboard above her head. ‘But that's not what I meant. What I mean is, what are you doing up so early?'

‘Going to school,' I said, stating the obvious. ‘I'm really looking forward to it.'

‘Well, I must say this is a great change. And, if I don't have to spend so long in the morning trying to wake you up in future, I won't know what to do with my time!'

‘Oh, there's no need to start worrying about that, Mum,' I replied cheerfully. ‘I won't be making a habit of it. It's only for this morning!'

‘Thought it was too good to be true,' she sighed. ‘Go on, get your Weetabix.'

I bolted it down, grabbed my things and tore off up the road. But despite me being so early, I was amazed to find Isabel already in the playground when I got to school.

‘What's up?' I said cheerfully. ‘Couldn't you sleep either?'

‘Dad and Penny had a bust up.' 

‘Who's Penny?'

‘My stepmum.'

‘Oh, I see,' I paused. ‘Serious?'

‘She screamed at him to get out. Told him she never wanted to see him again. Then he went out, slamming the door behind him. But, just before he did, he took this little porcelain statue of a ballerina from the table in the hall and threw it on to the floor. It was her very favourite thing and it lay there in a million bits. She went completely mad.'

‘When was this?' I whispered. I felt more concerned because Is wasn't whimpering or anything. She was just quietly relating the facts as if she had been watching something that didn't really concern her.

‘About six-thirty this morning.'

‘So what did you do?'

‘Got dressed and came to school of course. What else was there to do?'

‘You've been here all this time.' 

‘Yes.'

I was amazed. ‘What have you been doing?'

‘Just thinking.'

‘Oh.' I didn't know what else to say.

Isabel looked at me in an old-fashioned sort of way and then smiled. ‘What about you? Why are you here so early? You look very cheerful for a Monday morning.'

‘You'll never guess,' I started.

‘Try me.'

‘I saw your bridge.'

‘What bridge?'

‘You know; the one you drew.'

‘Oh, that bridge.'

I was really disappointed. She didn't seem in the slightest bit interested. But then, her parents had just had a blazing row, and even if she gave the impression of not being concerned, it must have had an effect on her.

But I persisted anyway, I was sure she'd be pleased.

‘Yes that bridge, Isabel. The bridge you drew in Mr Phillips' class, the one you got into trouble over…'

‘What about it?'

‘Well, I've only been and seen it, haven't I?' I said proudly. ‘It's at Maidenhead. It's a railway bridge. And it's exactly like you drew it, you know with those really flat arches that look impossible and all that…'

She looked puzzled. ‘Yes, I know.'

I was flabbergasted.

‘What do you mean, “you know”? Are you saying you've seen it before?'

‘Yes, of course.'

‘Then why didn't you say something to old Phillips when he was going on about it? He was wrong. Your bridge could have been built. It has been built. It's there. I've seen it.'

‘What's the point?'

‘My dad says it's famous. So old Phillips should have known about it anyway, shouldn't he? Even less reason for behaving like he did.'

‘What's it matter? There were lots of people like Mr Phillips when it was built. They thought it'd fall down too. Some of them even wanted it to. I didn't care then and I don't care now.'

‘What do you mean? I don't follow you.'

‘Nothing.'

She turned away and starting kicking at a loose bit of gravel in the playground, ignoring me.

I was starting to feel a bit angry with her by now. She'd argued with a teacher, and ended up with detention when all she had to say was that it was a real bridge that she'd seen. How stupid.

‘Oh well, please yourself, Isabel Williams.' I stalked off in a huff. I couldn't believe how ungrateful she was. And I thought she was a friend. I was feeling so cross as I crossed the playground that I had to stop for a second and take a deep breath to calm down. I looked over my shoulder and saw Is was still standing exactly where I had left her, still kicking at bits of gravel. ‘I don't know why I bother,' I muttered to myself as I started off again. Unfortunately, I was still looking at Is as I set off so I didn't see Kevin Ryder coming in the opposite direction as he sauntered into the playground.

‘Hey, watch where you're going!' he yelled as I careered into him.

‘Sorry Kev, didn't see you there.'

‘Want to watch where you're going mate,' he repeated. ‘Anyway, it's lucky I bumped into you.'

‘I think I bumped into you actually.'

‘Don't matter. Lucky for you either way. I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse.'

‘Sorry? I think you're wrong there, Kevin, whatever it is.'

‘You seen The Godfather?'

‘Whose godfather?'

‘Not anybody's godfather. The Godfather. It's a film, just come out. It's about the Mafia, you know, organised crime and all that? You must've heard of it.'

‘Oh yes, I think I have. But what about it?'

‘That's where it comes from, see? The film: Marlon Brando in the film he's the Godfather and he says “I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse”.' Kevin repeated it with an American accent so awful it made him sound ridiculous, not menacing as he intended.

Trying to keep a straight face, I answered. ‘No, sorry Kevin, I haven't seen the film. In fact I don't think I can. I'm under age. How come you've seen it?'

‘Well I haven't actually seen it, not properly,' he admitted. ‘But my brother has.'

Kevin had an older brother who was in his final year at school, and was even bigger and uglier than Kevin, if that were possible. It was also why Kevin used to hang around with some so-called ‘mates' who were a lot older than he was. I could see why The Godfather would appeal to him.

‘You still haven't told me what you want, Kevin. What “offer” are you making exactly?' I asked.

‘How would it be…?' he started, as he slid his hands into his pockets and leaned back in what he assumed was a nonchalant way. ‘How would it be, if you didn't 'ave to do no more maths homework?'

‘Great. That'd be really good. And you're going to do it for me I suppose are you?' I laughed.

‘Yeah. You got the picture.'

I stared at him for a minute, wondering if my hearing was going.

‘I think you'll have to say that again, Kevin. I thought for a minute you were saying that you'd do my maths homework for me.'

‘Zactly,' he replied and a broad grin crossed his face, making him look like one of those pumpkins you get at Halloween.

‘Well, it's a very nice idea, Kevin. Thank you. But isn't there something just a teeny-weeny bit wrong with your very generous offer?'

‘What?'

‘You're no good at maths.'

‘Don't matter.'

‘It does if I want my homework to be right.'

‘That is the beauty of my little proposition.' He smiled again in a horrible, smarmy sort of way. ‘What I'm offering you…'

‘…this offer I can't refuse, you mean?' I added.

‘Correct. What I'm offering you is the chance to have your maths and other homework done for you by the best brains in the school.'

‘Not by you then?' I couldn't resist saying.

‘No,' Kevin missed my sarcasm, ‘course not, it'll be done by a team of experts carefully chosen from the top form in the school.'

‘And who has chosen this team of experts?
You?'

‘Don't be daft,' Kevin laughed. ‘Course not. They've been chosen by my brother. We call it Brains United!'

‘Brains United? It's like Manchester United is it?'

‘No, don't be stupid, that's a football team. No, Brains United is like bringing together all the best brains to work on your homework.'

‘Really?'

‘Yeah. My brother's mates do it for you, you see? I mean the maths we have to do is easy-peasy for them. They could do it standing on their heads.'

‘Is that wise?'

He ignored this and carried on.

‘So what do you think then? Worth every penny I'd say.'

‘I wondered when you would get round to the cost, Kevin.'

‘Well, you can't expect me to provide a service like that for nothing, can you?'

‘Of course not. And so how much will it cost to have Brains United do my homework for me?'

‘10p a week.'

‘10p a week. You have got to be joking.'

‘No. Why would I? I told you it was an offer you couldn't refuse. And if you want more subjects I can do you a deal.'

‘I thought you said it was 10p a week to have my homework done?'

‘No, 10p for maths. You'll have to pay extra for other subjects, course you will. I mean you could have Brains United Science…'

‘Brains United Science – B.U.S. – that spells “bus” doesn't it?'

‘Does it?' Kevin's brain cells worked overtime and eventually he agreed with me. ‘Oh yeah, so it does. Yeah, well, as I say there's that one
…
or you could choose Brains United Geography…'

‘B.U.G. Bug.'

‘Oh yeah! That's funny isn't it?'

‘Hilarious Kevin. But I'm sorry, I really don't want to waste my money, thank you.'

‘You don't know what you're missing.'

‘Oh believe me I do. I think having your brother's mates doing my homework spells nothing but trouble. Talking of which, do you realise what Brains United Maths spells?'

‘What d'you mean?'

‘Just work it out. It sort of sums up what I think of your idea.' I smiled and walked off, leaving Kevin frowning as his brain cells started grinding into action. And at that moment, thankfully, the bell went for the start of school.

4

Under the River

I hardly spoke with Is for the rest of the day – I was still feeling annoyed with her – and it wasn't until we were getting our coats off the pegs that she came up to me with a sly sort of grin on her face.

‘Rob,' she said. I should have known something was up; she hardly ever called me Rob even though pretty well everyone else in my class did. She seemed to prefer ‘Robert', which I thought sounded terribly old fashioned.

‘Yes,' I answered as petulantly as I could.

‘Oh, don't be like that,' she said. ‘I've got an idea.'

‘Well?' I tried to sound totally uninterested.

‘You know that bridge…'

‘Yes.'

Then her face became wreathed in smiles.

‘Oh, Rob, you are funny! I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry I was so ungrateful this morning – really!'

‘It's just that…' I began, ‘well I couldn't understand your attitude, that's all. I mean there's this bridge, large as life, just like you drew. And you don't seem interested. If that had been me, I'd have taken it and rammed it right down old Phillips' throat, the way he went on at you.'

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